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"You Know You're Australian When..." Quotes

StricktlyDating is an Australian writer who creates pages of original funny quotes and status updates.

you-know-youre-australian-when

"You know you're Australian when" quotes written by a true blue Aussie.

Once you know these little Aussie secrets, and our Australian slang, you‘ll have to admit you’re almost definitely Australian. Like when you have that cute blue tongue lizard in your yard, or you know a kangaroo could beat any human in a boxing match, or a serious dint in your car. But you know there is truly nothing to worry about when you have a few daddy long legs living in your bedroom! You might even leave them there, but if there was a funnel web, ypu’d think of clearing out!

You Know You're Australian When:

  • You have a spider as big as a dinner plate living in your lounge room and you're not really worried, because it's only a Huntsman.
  • And a little daddy longs legs never bothers anyone.
  • You go to the servo for your petrol.
  • You go to the Bottle-O for your grog.
  • Your don't go to a barbie without your beer stubby and your esky.
  • You love your barbie (And it's not a doll).
  • You went outside for less than 5 seconds and you are covered in mosquito bites.
  • You're strongly encouraged to slip, slop slap.
  • When you hear “Goodonya mate!”.
  • When if it's not on, it's NOT ON!
  • When you don't be a tosser.
  • When ants have moved into your kitchen and they are laying eggs in your kitchen sponge and your toasted sandwich maker.
  • When you find special beaches for dogs.
  • When you are not allowed to keep a Kangaroo for a pet but you are allowed to eat them.
  • When you dial before you dig.
  • When you each chips - Not fries or crisps.
  • When you have a thong tan (On your feet) all year through.
  • You can run, dance, could even build a house wearing thongs. You even own dressy things for more formal occasions.
  • When you need to get a pen license before you can stop using your pencil at school.
  • When you check for Red-Back's before sitting on the dunny.
  • When you have Blue Tongues living in your yard, and you think they're friendly.
  • When saying "Far out!" doesn't mean you're a hippie.
  • When what you're saying is fair dinkum.
  • When everyone calls you their mate.
  • When half the time walking out in your yard is like walking into an oven, and the rest of the time it's like jumping in the river.
  • When you say "Straya mate!" when referring to where you're from.
  • When there aren't many full words in your sentences.
  • When you understand that it's acceptable to call Tom - Tommo, but you wouldn't call Sarah - Saraho.
  • When they build the great wall of China to keep the rabbits out.
  • When you always have tan lines. Even in winter.
  • When you drive though "Macca's".
  • When you know "Crikey!" can mean something's either good or bad.
  • When something's "Bloody" doesn't mean there is blood.
  • When something's a "Ripper!" you know it doesn't mean it's actually ripped.
  • When your builder is a "Brickie" and your truck driver is a "Truckie", but your Accountant is still your Accountant.
  • When having a "Chin wag" doesn't mean wiggling your chin.
  • When you know all the words to the "Wiggles" songs.
  • When you write 'Colour' not color.
  • When your mother is mum - not mom.
  • When someone might look buff, but it doesn't mean you want to see them in the buff!
  • When your water usage costs $20 a quarter but your water bill is $600 because of taxes.
  • When your 3 year old has an ipod touch and an ipad and will have a iphone soon.
  • When you have a mobile phone - not a cell phone.
  • When you don't play football with a round ball.
  • When you play Soccer you use a round ball, but you prefer your footy.
  • When you'll visit a 'Big Banana' or a 'Big Prawn'.
  • When you rarely see money because you operate with plastic.
  • When your shopping is rounded into 0.01c but the lowest coin is 0.05 cents.
  • When you wash your money the notes are still perfectly fine.
  • When it's dark by 5pm in winter.
  • When there's a heatwave and a flood in the same week.
  • When you get mixed up with the time during the year due to "Daylight Savings".
common-aussie-slang-words
  • When it's fine to call someone "Mate!" when you don't know their name.
  • When tomato sauce goes on any food toasted or fried.
  • When you could fry an egg on the roof of your car one minute, and the next minute you are running for shelter from the hail.
  • When you can pick the difference between a Great White and a Dolphin in the surf.
  • When you once owned a Commodore.
  • When you still don't know all the words to the national anthem.
  • When "Aussie Aussie Aussie Oi Oi Oi"
  • When mash potato and pumpkin are perfectly acceptable on toast, for breakfast.
  • When you put honey and sugar in your porridge.
  • When you say "Oh struth!"
  • When you've been wearing a school uniform since pre-school.
  • When you know that Koala's aren't that easy to cuddle.
  • When you call your female friends "Chickies".
  • When you eat a paddle pop.
  • When you know that Kangaroo's can do better Karate than any human.
  • When you say "Hoo roo!" when you're leaving.
  • When it's against the law to have a 'shot' after midnight.
  • When your cigarette packet has photo's of patients in hospital beds and one packet costs you half your days pay.
  • When you're stung by a 'Blue Bottle' in the surf.
  • When you have a designer hand bag but your jeans cost $6 at Kmart, and no one cares.
  • When you have to stop at 16 sets of traffic lights to drive 5kms.
  • When you have to keep a log book of your driving practice before you can sit for your licence.
  • When you wake up in the morning and there's a new Prime Minister and there has been no vote.
  • When the same Prime Minister who was booted out, without a public vote, is the new Prime Minister again, still without a vote.
  • When you get paid $8000 by the Government for having a baby.
  • When your baby wears a nappy and uses a dummy.
  • When possums annoy you at night.
  • When you really do have a home amongst the Gum trees.
  • When your have a six figure debt because you decided to get a Degree.
  • When you wear a green and gold wig and face paint to sporting events.
  • When you go shopping wearing swim wear.
  • When you could drive for 10 hours straight and still only be half way to your holiday destination.
  • When it costs less to fly overseas than fly to the other side of the country.
  • When pretty girls in bikini's top up your parking meter when you're out shopping in Surfers.
you-know-youre-australian-when
you-know-youre-australian-when
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When this is your back yard companion.

When this is your back yard companion.

Go the green and gold!

Go the green and gold!

© 2013 StrictlyQuotes

Comments:

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on August 05, 2014:

Gday Dawin, that's interesting! You are partly Aussie now, maybe!

Dawen on July 29, 2014:

Of course, the dark by 5pm, Daylight Savings, and six figure debt from getting a degree all apply to my area of the States, too.

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on January 29, 2014:

G'Day DDE, glad you found it interesting :)

Devika Primić from Dubrovnik, Croatia on January 25, 2014:

Incredible ways to know if you are Australian I have not read this before certainly an interesting hub.

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on February 24, 2013:

Thanks Astra! I'm glad you got a laugh from reading this Hub! :)

Cathy Nerujen from Edge of Reality and Known Space on February 24, 2013:

Wow, these are great aussie quotes. I laughed reading this hub. Well done.

Anon on February 01, 2013:

You know you're Australian when a dingo took your baby #LOL

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on January 31, 2013:

G'day dobo700 thanks!

Hi MsDora, that's lovely to know and nice to hear from you too!

Dora Weithers from The Caribbean on January 30, 2013:

I got some smiles out of the ones I understood. I still think Aussies have lots of fun. Thanks for sharing.

dobo700 from Australia on January 29, 2013:

Good to see some more ozzy content

Dobbo - Adelaide

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on January 28, 2013:

G'day Seeker7! That's so lovely of you to comment, I'm thrilled and glad to cheer you up too :)

Helen Murphy Howell from Fife, Scotland on January 28, 2013:

LOL!!! What a great hub!! This has really cheered me up tonight - brilliant!!

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on January 28, 2013:

G'Day Bob! You're no drongo!

Very nice to hear from you and I'm glad you enjoyed this Hub!

Hoo roo!

diogenes from UK and Mexico on January 28, 2013:

Ha!...don't, you had me in stitches and I MISS Oz!

Of course, a lot of those colloquisms the Poms share with you, mate!

But not ...

Hoo Roo!

Love from The Pommy Drongo x