There are many factors that go into building a loving relationship. Certainly it helps that if two people have some things in common, how they like to spend their time. It also helps in understanding the common values surrounding religion or spirituality, politics, environment, abortion, and personal development. It helps if they both eat junk food or both eat organic food. It becomes easier if both are clean or both are messed up, if both are on time or both are late. Physical attraction is also very important. This is great if they have common values around money and expenses.
Yet a couple can have it all and still not have a love affair if an element is missing. Without this essential component, all other amazing qualities will not be enough to make the relationship work.
This essential component is about intention.
At any given time, each of us is devoted to only one of two different intentions: to control or to learn. When our intention is to control, our deepest motivation is to control love, avoid pain and feel safe. At the time When we decided to learn, our deepest motivation is to learn to love ourselves and others.
The motivation to find love rather than love can cause havoc within a relationship.
Forget it: There is no need to remember "always" the bad things that happened during an argument. Sometimes actively "forget". Be the first to apologize and make. Go for it!
Fun: Couples have fun on dates, then get married and also very serious. Lighten up. Go to Yahoo Games (from the http://Yahoo.com main site) and join any number of cards or other games. Or head to a local rental shop and rent an Xbox or other game player and some games.
Disagree: Agree that it is okay to disagree on some issues, and leave it at that. There is no need to create a new religion or political movement just to please both of you. You do not have to agree on everything. And you don't win And that's fine.
Remind: Take time to look back, remind your memories and share what brought you together. Especially when times are tough, lean back and rely on these old memories as your foundation and glue yourself back with them (not literally!).
Memories: Do something together. Enjoy special moments, special anniversary dates and events. Does not need to be detailed. For example, you might enjoy watching a hot air balloon race one spring day. Next year, you can schedule a time to revisit it. Make it an annual event. As time becomes a topic, collect postcards with balloons on card games, toss pillows.
Now start with these simple ideas to maintain your relationship with your ordinary person for a long time. The most important thing is that couples can live happily together to understand and complete each other