StricktlyDating is an Australian writer who creates pages of original funny quotes and status updates.
A page of funny OMG status updates and quotes.
Funny OMG Status Updates And Quotes:
- Stop looking at me... OMG.
- Just a little late for the gym today. OMG that's one year late.
- When your boyfriend has bigger boobs than you. OMG.
- OMG, hair on your head should be called public hair.
- OMG, outdated meme's should be called memeries!
- OMG, pregnant woman should be the ones called body builders!
- OMG, bedrooms should be called restrooms, not the toilets!
- Trying not to spaz out after being swooped by a magpie. OMG.
- 9am can I please fast forward to 5pm. OMG.
- I'm so clumsy I've started using paper plates and plastic cups at home. OMG.
- The sign on the footpath says DON'T WALK so I ran. Fast. OMG.
- I love seeing men cleanly shaven, style hair and wearing suits. OMG.
- OMG. I love being stuck between bikini babes lining up for hot chips at the beach.
- Oh. Em. Gee!
- OMG, you're wearing complex Instagram double braids and painted in eyebrows at 9am when I've barely had time to wash my face.
- OMG, that made me laugh so loud I spat coffee all over my keyboard!
- OMG, I cannot unread the Tweet I just read.
- OMG! The rain is wet.
- Selfies with a toilet seat in the background! OMG so classy!
- OMG! Volcano's should be called mountain fountains!
- OMG! There is 86,400 seconds in a day. But who's counting...
- What's she got that I don't? OMG.
- OMG. I'll have whatever Miranda Kerr is eating, drinking, wearing and putting in her hair.
- When your celebrity crush has more problems than your ex. OMG.
- STOP IT!... I refresh the page, your tweet appears, I fall off my chair laughing! OMG.
- So, school uniforms include high-heels these days, OMG.
- My 8 year old cousin got an iPhone for his Birthday. OMG.
- Although I'm here at my desk, In my mind I'm in Paris. OMG, and a French man is feeding me croissants and Champagne for breakfast.
- Dreamed I was in a room full of Play Bunnies. And they were hopping around after me. OMG.
- Slept 12 hours. Still tired. OMG.
- 3am still wide awake. OMG.
- OMG I hate it when my underwire bra breaks out and stabs me in the armpit.
- OMG! It's my Birthday and I don't feel a day over fabulous!
- Every single channel is on a commercial break. OMG.
- OMG! Sorry I didn't return your call. I don't use my phone for that.
- Forgetting to set the alarm clock on a Sunday night. OMG.
- I just tried to answer the phone with the remote control. OMG.
- Forgot I was at work and answered the phone with "Hiya!" OMG.
- When you meet someone for 3 seconds and then they add you on Facebook. OMG.
- I brought a new dress. He called and cancelled our date. OMG.
- Left my phone in the office and it beeped all night. OMG.
- 40 degrees today. Left my Tuna sandwich in my boyfriends car. OMG.
- Home dye. Yellow hair. OMG MAKE AN APPOINTMENT!
- $5 for bottled water. OMG beer is cheaper! Beer please!
- There is no more food. OMG.
- I am feeling Fridaylicious! OMG!
- "I want to live in your socks so I'm with you every step of the way!" OMG.
- "Hey look! Even the leaves are falling for you!" OMG.
- OMG there is something wrong with your cell phone! It doesn't have my number in it.
- Wearing purple with orange today, only clothes that didn't need ironing. OMG.
- OMG. Wearing that purple and orange outfit LIKE A BOSS!
- Being at a party with 3 of your ex's in the room. OMG not fun.
- "Do you like whales? Because I would like to free your willy". OMG!
- When your taxi driver has bad B.O... OMG. Windows down please!
- OMG I cannot sit down. Cheek sunburn!
- Realising you've found true love is an OMG moment.
- OMG. Did I just log into Sookbook?
- OMG he's hotter than a volcano.
- OMG I hate you. I wanna be you.
- OMG the smell of mom's cooking. Priceless!
- I can still fit into the earrings I wore in high school. OMG!
- Waiting for the weekend. OMG I hate Mondays!
- Just read the texts I sent when I was partying last night. OMG.
- Last night was wild! OMG.
- Boyfriend shaved his entire body. Not happy. OMG.
- I've found my dream girl. OMG. She plays heavy metal in her car.
- I hate slow laptops... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... OMG.
- When your crush wants to date your mate. OMG.
- When there's a spider the size of a cat inside your car. OMG, that's when you know you're Aussie.
- OMG. If you're going to be two-faced at least make one of them pretty.
- When your blind date is someone you've already dated. OMG.
- When your boobs creep out of your bra. OMG.
- I'm flirting? OMG. I'm from the real world where people call it TALKING.
- Just got asked out by someone who looks older than my dad. OMG.
- When your date's dad asks what your intentions are with his daughter. OMG.
- The shop assistant had just passed wind when I went up to him. OMG. Like salami. Up my nose.
- Just flirted with a stranger because he looked like my childhood crush (The Cookie Monster). OMG.
- OMG I was ironing in my underwear, too close to the window. Sorry Postman.
- Accidentally sending a text to the wrong person OMG.
- Relationship Status: OMG!
- OMG. Just slapped my face, thought there was a spider but it was just my hair blowing in the breeze.
- OMG. You update your status LIKE A BOSS!
- OMG my heart drops when I drop my phone and I pray the screen doesn't crack.
- When you're standing up on a crowded bus and someone pinches you on the butt. OMG.
- OMG After Monday and Tuesday even my calender says W T F.
- I just got caught in one of those OMG it's not what it looks like moments!
- I said I "love you". He said "Okay". O M G.
- When even the weirdest person you know has a boyfriend and you're always single. OMG.
- Can we just be friends? OMG I hate when that happens.
- I don't have ex's I have Y's. OMG Y did I do that!
- Photos of celebrities without makeup. OMG.
- When you're wondering if the person is a boy or a girl. OMG.
- When you finally get to talk to your crush and accidentally say "I love you". OMG *runs away*
- Oreo Recipe: Dip biscuits in melted chocolate, batter and fry...OMG.
- When you're at a friends house and you've done a number two, and it won't flush. OMG.
Author: Stricktlydating Copyright 2013.
© 2013 StrictlyQuotes
Ken Taub from Long Island, NY on June 20, 2013:
StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on May 05, 2013:
Diogenes, you are so funny! You need to get some of those stories online here at Hubpages! And thanks for your comments DDE! I loved hearing from you both :)
diogenes on May 04, 2013:
The one that wouldn't flush reminds me of my days on the Cruiser, HMS Sheffield. I was the shithouse dodger for a month (cleans toilet). We had a "turd of the week" contest and a huge floater was fished out and varnished!
Devika Primić from Dubrovnik, Croatia on May 04, 2013:
Cool so true and you did this hub so well the thought of OMG fits in anywhere these days.
StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on May 03, 2013:
OMG! So lovely to have comments from some of my favourite's on Hubpages! Thank you acaetnna, kidscraft and Sunny River - Enjoy your weekend too :)
acaetnna from Guildford on May 03, 2013:
OMG ... just great!
Sunny River from A Place Without A Name which resides somewhere between Fantasy and Belief, just north of Reality on May 03, 2013:
Thanks for the laugh! That was great!