Sometimes shoe designers have a bad day. Other times they have a really good day. Who knows what kind of day they were having when they invented these unusual shoes?
Maybe they were due to go on holidays and rushed out something quick with a WOW factor but without really thinking it through clearly. Or maybe they’d just returned from a rave.
I’ve written two other hubs about unusual shoes (Bizarre Shoes and Weird Shoes) and many people have found them quite frightening, as well as being good for a laugh. Many of the shoes showcased so far seem to have the common theme of being highly uncomfortable to wear, but they also make great eye candy as well as being an excellent novelty gift for masochists.
Enjoy & share if you dare!
1. 3D Printed Alien Heels
Coming soon to a 3D printer near you are these delightfully alienoid plastic shoes, which you can even paint yourself, for uniqueness. Not only are they structured from plastic, but you’ll practically need to be plastic yourself just to put them on and stand up.
After a few days, you might possibly benefit from the services of a plastic surgeon too, not only to hammer your feet and ankles back into shape, but also to realign your newly formed alien spine.
Verdict: Wear if you are planning to visit the Alien. She will be impressed and while we know her acid spittle eats metal, there is no evidence to suggest that it reacts on plastic.
2. Invisible Shoes
It was only a matter of time before someone listened to the military and invented shoes to match the fabled invisible cloak, made of reflective mirrors. With these shoes, it is possible to walk around looking like you have no feet and that you are hovering on thin air.
However, it is unclear what use the shoes would be without a matching set of leggings and a coat. The facets at the front of this shoe suggest that it is more of a fashion item and would be highly suited to New Year’s parties - imagine seeing an explosion of fireworks reflected in them!
Verdict: For New Year's parties, fancy dress parties, or any parties really, but not for armed combat as the mirrors will give your position away.
3. Porcelain Potty Wedges
Fancy wearing a couple of toilet bowls on your feet? Well here’s your big chance to wreck your ankles! Suitable for EVERY room décor in bathroom white, you’ll always be fashionable, as well as fashionably late to appointments and fashionably uncomfortable climbing stairs.
These marvellous shoes can be used for a variety of purposes – as a spare potty for a toddler, a temporary bonsai display holder or even as a quick sushi platter when you’re on the street! Just carry the chopsticks and toilet paper in your hairstyle.
Verdict: Wear to toilet conventions, public toilets or anywhere else where you can help people avoid urine soaked floors for $2 a go.
4. The Steampunk Spike Boot
If you’re having trouble sleeping in the desert, this shoe will help immensely. Squash scopions, snakes, spiders and even your dinner with the mean-looking spikes on the sole. Serrated edges mean that the squashed things can’t run away afterwards, and you’ll be able to merrily toast them while watching the stars.
Verdict: Perfect for harsh terrain where you have to survive by catching and killing your food. Just don’t wear them on a horse!
5. Rams Horn Shoes
Looking for a farm shoe to show off your prowness and uncastrated status among the sheep people? Look no further than the Rams Horn Shoe, a delightfully paganistic rumination suitable for those who want to mark their territory while chewing on a cud.
Not only is this shoe made from the skin of the creature it is meant to represent, but the inventor cut apart the skin and sewed it back together to represent the animal. Were they out there or what? Imagine cutting apart a leopard, only to sew it back together again as a leopard shaped shoe…..crazy!
Verdict: Wear these if you are an Aries, or when you want to make love to sheep. Or even if you just hate rams.
6. Maggot Heels
Certainly one for the zombie parade, Maggot Heels are destined to take you far and wild…beyond this realm and into the next, where your decomposing body can be attractively attired and shod.
The maggots look like a spongy type of material which could be very comfortable to walk on, if only it didn’t look like you were walking on maggots.
Verdict: Wear to a comedy funeral, a horror movie set or living dead fancy dress party.