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SI Has Given Way to DQ In Terms of the Jinx

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Al Oliver made the Team Based On His Unique Nickname

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Back when the most in-depth sports coverage came from print media, one popular magazine became infamous for the stars it put on its covers. Because of several injuries or career-ending slumps shortly after appearing on the cover, fans began referring to the Sports Illustrated Jinx.

While the magazine put a hex on stars from every sport, a new kind of jinx has so far been limited to baseball. It involves neither a magazine nor a newspaper, but rather a popular fast food chain.

“Dairy Queen selected four players this season to market their ice cream and sandwiches,” stated the Sporting News on August 18 via social media. “Bryce Harper, Tim Anderson, Cody Bellinger, and Fernando Tatis.”

All four would face terrible adversity this season, leading fans to believe that representing Dairy Queen might be serving bad luck along with that delicious ice cream. Harper of the Philadelphia would miss most of the year after breaking his thumb on June 26, and Anderson would be out of the Chicago White Sox lineup for six weeks after breaking his finger.

Former Most Valuable Player Bellinger, while not injured, has nevertheless suffered a .210 batting average with the Los Angeles Dodgers this year. Tatis, the San Diego Padres shortstop, has just received an eighty game suspension after testing positive for a performance enhancing drug.

Since it is unlikely that no player will want to be associated with the chain in the near future, I suggest Dairy Queen take a different approach when using baseball to promote its wares. The selections for their products should be based on names, players whose monikers are associated with the delicious offerings from Dairy Queen.

Here is a lineup stocked with baseball names that can be found in your local Dairy Queen.

Duke Carmel, Left Field

His first name is not quite the royalty of the monarch of the restaurant, but his realm was with the St. Louis Cardinals in the late Fifties and early Sixties.

Billy Sunday, Center Field

Greater fame would come to Sunday as an author, whose eminence first emerged as a member of the Chicago Cubs.

Darryl Strawberry, Right Field

The All-Star slugger's first name is just one letter from being Dairy, the last of course being one of its most popular flavors.

David Freese, Third Base

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Pretty much unknown until the 2011 World Series, when he earned Most Valuable Player honors by leading the St. Louis Cardinals over the Texas Rangers.

Trea Turner, Shortstop

Now granted, DQ does not sell an item pronounced the same way as the first name of the Los Angeles Dodger infielder, but the restaurant does provide them to help transport food.

George Creamer, Second Base

He played in the late Nineteenth century, suiting up for three teams and ending with Pittsburgh.

Al “Scoop” Oliver, First Base

One of the most consistent hitters of the Seventies in both leagues, this lovable member of the “We Are Family” Pittsburgh World Series Championship team should be in the Hall of Fame.

Scott Servais, Catcher

Before becoming a well-respected manager, Scott served eleven years in the Nineties and 2000s with mostly the Houston Astros and Chicago Cubs

David Cone, Starting Right Hander

Perennial Cy Young candidate Cone was one of the most dominant pitchers in baseball in the eighties and Nineties, including stints with both the Mets and the Yankees.

Mel Queen, Starting Left Hander

After failing to earn a spot as an outfielder with the Reds, Queen became a key piece out of the Cincinnati bullpen in the late Sixties and early Seventies.

Dan Quisenberry, Closer

Quisenberry is not actually a flavor at Dairy Queen, but the Hall of Fame Kansas City reliever has the perfect initials to represent the restaurant.

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