Reformed Eve is a daughter of God, which makes her royalty - no matter what the world throws at her. She straightens her crown quite often.
Me, Samson, and I
I feel that for most of my life, I was a Samson. It has been mentioned that character flaws can squander "potential." I have always had a fundamental, yet small, foundation that involved faith in Christ and his love. Samson's biggest downfall, which ultimately undermined his potential, was his lack of fear when it comes to God. The Bible has a large emphasis on the fear of God. Fear of God can mean fear of the judgment of God, but it has a much deeper significance than this. We know that God loves us and is forgiving towards us. In this case, the fear represents an awareness full of God where one recognizes the majesty of God. In this respectful fear, we acknowledge that only in God can we find everlasting peace that is comforting and true.
Proverbs 15:33 mentions that "the fear of the Lord is an instruction in wisdom, and humility goes before honor." Instead of feeling that fear is the fear of getting caught in a wayward path by God, fear is more wanting to avoid filling someone that is loved, who one is loved by, with an offense with one's actions." Deuteronomy 10: 12-13 mentions this: And now, Israel, what does the Lord your God require of you, but to fear the Lord your God, to walk in all his ways, to love him, to serve the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul, and to keep the commandments and statutes of the Lord, which I am commanding you today for your good?" In this case, fear of the Lord is where wisdom begins. Without fear for the Lord, one will walk in darkness, and it will be expectantly hard to walk away from evil thoughts and acts. According to the Bible, we are not to live in fear, as 'fear not' is mentioned many times; however, we are ONLY to fear God.
Samson was fully aware that his strength was in the gift of knowing God in a meaningful, profound manner. He knew that putting God first, following God's path, being faithful and putting God in the center of his life equated to this authentic, awe-inspiring strength. This is how Samson and I are similar, and in how I have emulated him. Even in the worst, heartbreaking moments of my life, I always understood that God was there and that I should follow him. I always knew, somehow, that to be strong, and succeed, and see changes in my life – God needed to be in the center. This can lead one to feel almost a strange, undeserved invincibility. One thinks that they can sin endlessly and that the consequences are relatively mild due to their supposedly elite 'chosen' status. In this mind state, one easily can twist and distort Scripture out of context to suit specific needs. The spiritual armor is neglected and begins to weaken with rust. The pagan ways are flirted with until they start to be part of life. Desires become less Godly, and worldlier. God's retribution is diluted, and then there it was – me, falling out of the favor of God – by following the ways of the world and feeling protected just because I wore a cross while calling myself a Christian.
Samson's story outlines what occurred when one becomes morally obese and content within a relationship, making the mistake of translating this passive style to God's grace. At many points in my life, I have allowed myself to be led away from the well of Living Water. Samson allowed his desires for someone to cloud his judgment. His emotion started to show his heart. Samson knew that the woman temptress in front of him was not whom God wanted him to associate with. This woman, with her beauty, lured Samson away from the Godly fear. His flesh gravitated solely on his physical and Eros-motivated needs. Marrying a Philistine woman was going against God's will, which involved the Israelites staying pure when it comes to culture and faith. Delilah, another Philistine-turned-wife, was also against Samson, ensuring she stayed true to her pagan ways. Delilah used treachery and manipulative skill to finally force Samson to divulge his strength and its' sacred origins.
I associate with Samson in that I, too, married someone outside of my faith. Second Corinthians mentions this: "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?" Deuteronomy 7: 3-4 mentions the consequence of intermarrying with unbelievers: "You shall not intermarry with them, giving your daughters to their sons or taking their daughters for your sons, for they would turn away your sons from following me, to serve other gods. Then the angel of the Lord would be kindled against you, and he would destroy you quickly." I, too, became complacent in my comfort. Again, at many points in my life, I abandoned the reverence I could have potentially experienced toward God. I became weak by my flesh. As happened with Saul, the Lord left me when my extreme reverence (fear) for God was lost. Only through acknowledging one’s sins and through true repentance was I regain this respectful fear that is necessary when one walks with Christ.
Like Samson, I felt that I had a strong potential to be a true disciple of Christ in the past. I have a strong ability to sympathize and emphasize with others in a unique way. Usually, in a crowd, random people come up to me to ask for my advice or tell me deep thoughts and secrets that they somehow feel comfortable sharing with me. I feel like it is easy to not immediately judge them, as I can easily understand their point of view using reasoning, science, my experiences, and my desire to help others. These kinds of gifts immediately become a target for Satan, who is the one who wants to devour our souls. Temptations arise, especially in areas that are considered our Achilles’ heel, and that is when the erosion begins. The more temptation is allowed, the bit of 'give' becomes all your soul – until you do not know who you are, and depression/anxiety riddle your mind with demons that would love nothing more than for you to take your own life. Regarding his hair, Luke 16:10 mentions this: "He who is faithful in a very little thing is faithful also in much; he who is unrighteous in a very little thing is unrighteous also in much."
In my past life, I used to believe in grey areas. Psalms 1:1-6 makes it clear that no gray area exists – you are either with God or against Him. Much like Samson, I was brought to places in my life that were full of shame, pain, and mental imprisonment. I have known God more in my weakest, darkest moments than I have in my entire life. There is joy in pain because you realize that God is what you truly desire, and God is what will set you free. I want to emulate Samson by becoming strong by asking God to forgive me. I want to understand the depth of my sins in the past and know that repentance is more than a slap on the hand – it is a genuine shift of one's reality – a complete abandonment of who I was. I need to realize that in the humiliation I Have experienced in my life, through my failures, I can find strength in God's love, grace, and forgiveness.
Real power is not in the body but the spirit. I want to be like Samson, pray with conviction, and ask the Lord to remember me and strengthen me. I want to become a spiritual giant like Samson and be willing to lose my life for the greater good of God's kingdom. I cannot be afraid by the pillars and the weight sustained by the cornerstones of this Satan-influenced life should I rock them from their foundations with God's strength. I want my life to emulate Samson's final act of strength and courage, and I want these things to have a more significant impact than the mistakes I have made in my life. Real courage gives us the strength to ask God for forgiveness, regardless of how stained the past was.
 Holy Bible: Containing the Old and New Testaments: King James Version. (New York: American Bible Society, 2010).
 Holy Bible: NIV: New International Version. (Durbanville: Christian Media Bibles, 2016).
 King James, The Holy Bible: The 21st Century King James Version: Containing the Old Testament and the New Testament. (Gary, S.D.: 21St Century King James Bible Publishers, 1994).
 Tyndale, Holy Bible: Inspire Bible NLT. (Tyndale House Publishers, 2016).
 Holy Bible: Containing the Old and New Testaments: King James Version. (2010).
 Holy Bible: Containing the Old and New Testaments
 Kenneth L Barker and John R, Zondervan NIV Bible Commentary (Grand Rapids, Mich.: Zondervan Pub. House, 1994).
Barker, Kenneth L, and John R. Zondervan NIV Bible Commentary. Grand Rapids, Mich.: Zondervan Pub. House, 1994.
Holy Bible: Containing the Old and New Testaments: King James Version. New York: American Bible Society, 2010.
Holy Bible: NIV: New International Version. Durbanville: Christian Media Bibles, 2016.
James, King. The Holy Bible: The 21st Century King James Version: Containing the Old Testament and the New Testament. Gary, S.D.: 21St Century King James Bible Publishers, 1994.
Tyndale. Holy Bible: Inspire Bible NLT. Tyndale House Publishers, 2016.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2021 Reformed Eve
Dora Weithers from The Caribbean on March 14, 2021:
"Morally obese." Interesting phrase. Great application of the Bible story. (Might you consider including some pictures.They add some attraction.)
Pamela Oglesby from Sunny Florida on March 13, 2021:
This is an interesting article about your struggles, Eve. Samson was certainly a man of God and I would like to serve like he did also.
I delight in the fact that Jesus came and washed away our sins. All we have to do is pray and ask.