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Created Differently

'Been married the last 22+ years and currently moderate 6 years old, 96,000 plus strong Marriage Educational Community on Facebook

Confederation of Aliens

Men and women are created differently. Figuratively, they could be said to come from two different planets. Men from Mars, and women from Venus. Yet, they have but found themselves here, on planet earth, and in need of living together in unity and peace, for the good and progress of all.

Holy Alliance

Holy Alliance

Martians: Gladiators from Mars

Men are created roughly on the edges, for external, physically visible, active strength. They are crafted for work, howbeit physically oriented work. The man was created with God in mind. He was created to worship and serve. That is his design and original programming. This programming is expected to have been reinforced by the parenting and mentoring of a father (authority) figure in his life as he comes to maturity.

Venerians: Amazons from Venus

Women are made with carefully finished and rounded edges, cleavages that sparkle and awaken the dead. Hence, they are made to look seemingly weak on the outside, as one shouting for help, and in need of carrying and caring for. Yet stronger than man, on the inside. A heavy weight lifter and wrestler commonized only for her deceptive weak disposition. Her strength is not visible, externally, nor is it physical. It is resident in the deep recess of her soul.

All who have taken her for granted, have done so only to the detriment of their own soul. She might not be able to lift physical weights. Don’t belittle her. Big and mighty things don’t come in big and mighty packages. They come in small, seeming insignificant embodying. Don’t judge a book by its cover is the age-old saying of the wise. How so very true it is in this case, just as well.

Any "doubting Thomas" out there? Maybe switching places in childbirth might convince you. Having to carry, and have another new life develop within you for nine (9) whole months. A man will simply go bonkers. Not to talk of the pain of childbirth, the decibels only a few men might have ever known.

Venerian vs Martian

Venerian vs Martian

Created for Service

The woman was created with man in mind. God looked at the things a man will need to make him complete and provided it in a package, called a woman, a man with a womb and breast. A womb to carry and a breast to nurture and ravish. What a God? When He provides, He provides completely.

The Creator sure balanced His endowment between the man and the woman. What one lacks the other compensates for. Each unique in his or her special way. Hence, the foolishness of a movement that seeks to make a man out of a woman, or a woman out of a man.

Beauty of the Garden

There is nothing in a woman that a man needs in his make up to be complete. He is complete already. Not seeing his completeness is a judgment of his immaturity, gap from equilibrium, and a possible mental malady that could do with some professional help. We might as well call a spade a spade. Don't you suppose?

There is nothing in a man that a woman needs in her makeup to be complete. She is complete already. She was complete on arrival, fully kitted with all the features and hormones to go to work as at when due. Glamorization and abuse of the chauvinistic spirit is no excuse for discontent. More like the “Black lives Matter” issue today. Should we then create a “Caucasian conversion machines or hormones?”

Of course, not. The Creator created the beauty of a garden. The beauty of a garden, the work of the gardener, is accentuated by the right amount of variety of flowers. There is beauty in variety. There is beauty in diversity.

Our strength is optimized in our Diversity and Inclusion, no one excluded, nor left behind. It is in each one being single, maturely accepting of themselves and others. Respecting and harnessing each one’s strengths and being a cover for the weaknesses.

Equals at the Table

When it comes to marriage, don’t forget it is a union of a man and a woman. That is a single man and a single woman. That is the way the Creator made it. That is what marriage is. Yes, I know there are different other colorations of men. Those are not marriage from a classical definition, point of view. They are what they are, but sure do not qualify as marriage from a classical point of view.

Marriage is between two wholes (not halves, at least not from a classical, nor idealistic point of view), independent man and woman, who are equal, and can live comfortably on their own, choosing to combine forces and arsenal together as one in continuing the journey of life. It is an exercise of the freewill in coming into an agreement to take life to another level.

The Hunter and His Price

A man in this wise is the natural hunter. His pride is in hunting. His build-up is created to hunt. A lack of understanding and coming to peace leads him astray, as it makes him a servant of the cravings of his desire, rather than the reverse. A hunter man does not take pride in body counts. That is a rogue, a pitiable, gone astray, purposeless, directionless, hormone enslaved being.

A man indeed is one who gives the right treasure to his price. He sees his destiny in his price. And, gives special attention to his hunting. For, as the Holy Book says, “He who finds a wife (not a girl, nor a prostitute) finds a GOOD THING and obtains FAVOR from the Lord.” Only fools will take that for granted.

A woman is made the price of a man's hunting. Wow! Such attention and thought that was put into fashioning out woman (a man with a womb and rightly sized breast). God had to outdo Himself here. After, each creation, He had hitherto said, “it was good.” But how does “it was good” look like? What represents the deep emotions and the joy of God’s heart in creation? What could speak without words?

How "It is Good" Looks

How does one crown his works? You build a structure and then you do what? You put the finishing to it, right? What is the finishing meant to accentuate? Why is it needed? You bake a cake, but for special occasions, you have a need for icing? Why? What is the use of the icing? What does the icing do to your cake in terms of presentability, beauty, and glory?

I can just imagine why and how Adam was lost for words when he first saw Eve. He started speaking in strange tongues. He saw glory. He saw beauty. He was swallowed up in her. He was consumed by her radiance. All his strength surrendered to what he saw. He who exemplified strength became a weakling to her who exemplified weakness. That is God.

At home...feels like heaven

At home...feels like heaven

"A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.”

— Oscar Wilde

A Place of Refuge

People have misrepresented men, by saying their uppermost need is sex. Really? Not true. Sex is not an end in itself. It is only a means to an end, something deeper within. A man is looking for rest, that only a woman can provide, for so she was equipped. What else do you suppose Delilah had over Samson? For those who know the story, in the Holy Book. Samson fell asleep on her lapse. My God!

If only women know how much strength and influence they have over men, they'll be filled with praise and thanksgiving all the days of their life. A few do though, and some abuse it. Therein is the genesis of the hunter-woman, an aberration, yet so powerful. Used in the marriage setting, it is a source of life, favor, and everything good.

A woman who knows her place and her strength knows she is an epitome of strength and power. She is a precious crowning jewel of inestimable worth, for which the man exhibits all is man-ness to get.

This content reflects the personal opinions of the author. It is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and should not be substituted for impartial fact or advice in legal, political, or personal matters.

© 2020 Akin Akinbodunse


Akin Akinbodunse (author) from Lagos, Nigeria on June 23, 2020:

@Tamarajo: Wow! Thanks for a thorough review. I appreciate your candid view. Th only way to avoid abusing a thing is to follow the manufacturer's instructions. In the same token, the only way we are going to get the fullness of life and all it entails is to follow the Creator's mandate. Thanks for being such a beautiful witness to this. I appreciate your time in sharing. Thanks and God bless you real good.

Tamarajo on June 22, 2020:

Hi Akin,

Scroll to Continue

I liked your perspective on this topic. You did a great job characterizing both men's and women's strengths and vulnerabilities, as well as how they were meant to work together and are actually complementary to one another.

It took me quite a life's journey to be able to appreciate God's ordained differences and purpose for male and female. Growing up, my role models and cultural influences presented so many and varied distortions of God's original design that the whole topic left me quite bitter and defensive.

I have since learned that distinguishing differences is not about comparing value. To observe that I am physically weaker than a male does not make me any less valuable. I sincerely appreciate that my husband is stronger than me. He has protected me in both word and physical defense on more than one occasion.

My husband, on the other hand, would say that he appreciates my ability, compared to his inability, to incubate. And I'm not speaking just about childbearing. He can throw one idea at me, and before he gets home from work, I have already developed the plan of execution and many times the result. His inability compared to my ability in this department does not make him less valuable, either. In fact, he utilizes this quite a bit.

We both have learned, sometimes the hard way, that these differences need not be points of conflict but rather a discovery of how the broader vision for operation works.

In the beginning, He created us male and female in His image. We were designed to unitedly, from our different aspects, develop kingdoms (have dominion) in the form of families that functioned with the same vision of growth and development built on the love, respect, and loyalty that God has given each one of us.

For me, cooperating with original design has liberated me in so many ways that it made me realize how much I was oppressing myself with my former views.

I appreciate your addressing this topic. I know it can be, sometimes, a touchy one.

dashingscorpio from Chicago on June 08, 2020:


Akin Akinbodunse (author) from Lagos, Nigeria on June 08, 2020:

@dashingscorpio: Very well said. I agree explicitly. Same token for a Martian or Venerian. There is a standard program for each. This gets corrupted or enforced depending on the events of life each is exposed to as he/she passed through life. That does not condemn them to the acquired state. For as long as there is a willingness, the program can be corrected to what it ought to be. However, by virtue of free agency, the person has to be willing. The human being is the only specie in creation who can decide the person he/she wants to be and become that same thing either metaphorically, or in actual reality. A person is not limited by his/her biology or history. He/she is only limited by his/her imagination. Herein is the power and glory of man, just as it represents his/her fall from glory, just as well. The difference being in the decision he/she decide to make.

dashingscorpio from Chicago on June 08, 2020:

I would say his only hope would be for an eagle to come along to educate him who he truly is and what he's capable of doing.

As one old adage goes: "When you know better you do better."

I have personally known children of one race that were raised in a area filled with another race of people. Their mannerisms, core beliefs, and manner of speaking are completely different from those kids who grew up around their own race of people. Wealth and finances is also another factor not to be overlooked.

Rich kids and poor kids expectations/behaviors tend to be different. Empathy & understanding require effort and willingness.

Akin Akinbodunse (author) from Lagos, Nigeria on June 08, 2020:

@dashingscorpio: Well said. How will we adjudge an eagle who grew up with chickens? Does his growing up with chickens make him a chicken? Does his behaving like a chicken make him a chicken? Is there hope for him to reprogrammed to who he truly his by the intervention of a mother eagle? Or, is he forever condemned to the life of a chicken?

dashingscorpio from Chicago on June 08, 2020:

While I do agree there are basic differences between men and women aside from the obvious physical traits along with how they typically approach things. However it's probably wise for us not to instantly assume a person is "automatically" a certain way based upon their gender. It requires an investment of time to truly get to know someone as well as sift through their "emotional baggage".

Our so called "formative years" and life experiences have a major impact on how we view the world and engage with others; probably more than our gender does. One man's opinion! :)

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