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Eric’s Sunday Sermon; Forgiveness and Regrets

Holding degrees in philosophy and Law. Formal studies or certificates or degrees in business, theology, insurance and security. Ex-preacher.

First New Year?

Talk about no regrets

Talk about no regrets

Do What You Can

Forgiveness and regrets go hand in hand. Forgiving is the finest way to clean out regrets. And though it may sound strange to others, regrets remind us to forgive. Quite often ourselves. Regrets and forgiveness go hand in hand. Probably I have much to regret with bad actions and such. But what I regret most is not practicing forgiveness.

What does it have to do with the new year, you may ask. And it is about moving forward with a clean slate behind us. Not to worry, no one expects you to get it all done in a day. Keep in mind that January 1st is a date on a calendar. New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day are great days to start anew.

I make a resolution every year that I basically get done. It is a concerted effort to look back before moving too quickly forward. Maybe even right some wrongs or practice forgiveness. Just that darned phone call I did not make on Christmas is a good place to start. People love to hear from other people generally. Sometimes it is not all about me. Ok, sometimes it is but let us keep that just between us.

Egos are interesting to look at. Mine is only about as large as the Grand Canyon. Thank goodness I know that, otherwise I might be in big trouble. And there you have it on egos. They can create a divide as large as the Grand. And if we do not go back and bridge that gap, the new year portends to carry baggage that is just plain too much of a burden for us to move forth in a productive manner and in good mental health. So maybe on the time line of things we are not mending but rather starting something new and better. You figure it out is reaching out to fix damage done, going forward or backward?

Like I say I make a resolution to forgive and to clean out regrets in the new beginnings of the year. Personally I have no trouble in walking back a mile to apologize. Best exercise there is for both body and spirit. And try to remember it is not about the reaction. You are not allowed to demand reciprocation. But you are commanded by the articles of love to do your part in a wise and loving manner.

Perhaps the situation may call for a prayer of sorts to ask for forgiveness of sins and no more.

Our Way Is Love

That Hike

In the middle of Nowhere

In the middle of Nowhere

Take It Easy

I am Christian to my every fiber of being. Just for me I feel an obligation when asking for forgiveness to both forgive and to repent. Now feel free to google repent. You will get stuff about remorse which I figure is a bunch like regret. But please do not stop at whatever google and dictionaries tell you.

If you delve into ancient Greek and Aramaic the term stems just as much from turning around as it does, sincere remorse. Perhaps like turning your back on unloving actions and facing love right it the old face.

Which kind of brings us to the new year part. We must first face our demons of the past year before we can turn and face our Lord. If you are unaware of the wrongs you have done you cannot turn away from them. How can you ask forgiveness for a regret you have but do not recognize.

There is a great term “soul searching”. I reckon that I kind of need to do that first. What stinking resentment have I stuffed down and what blame of mine have I not accepted? It may just appear to be that anger is one of those deals. Take my word for it, digging that stuff up and dealing with it is hard on you and hard to do. I do not refer here to a therapist or a minister, although that might be good for many. I am talking about hard core reflection.

I think it was my dad who commented to me that people are important and not stuff. I think I was whining on the phone to him. He clearly was not just referring to stuff as in things, but more like stuff as in issues with others. We were working on some heavy stuff about WHO and the new Internet possibilities and yes, rules and regulations. Back then I had a nasty habit of fighting so hard on an issue I trampled on folks. If I need to tear them down to win, well so be it. My dad being a dad was more concerned with his son than any danged issue.

You hurt enough people and the greatest hurt lies within yourself.

Hey, did you know that you can pick any day to start a new year, no rules against it. Shucks you can do it 365!

Dad

I figure we both forgave each other.

I figure we both forgave each other.

Wonderful

Happy Happies

We were on a tough four day hike and I was flailing and wailing. As I sat down on a large boulder to console myself my elder son walked back to me. And he simply looked at me and asked “Dad are you a giver or a taker?” What a wakeup call. The choice was mine. Even my backpack of too many pounds was lighter and my burden slipped away somewhere in that canyon.

So to review in January is a way of looking where I took and did not give. Almost to 100% the lack of giving was a lack of giving love. I like to say “in love”. Not meaning a relationship particularly with another but more like being in the moment and being there “in love”.

Probably that takes us back to that darned ego. If I am in a place of ego, my love connection gets untethered. And if I break that connection first I immediately flow into ego and so often repressed anger. I think prayer and meditation are key here, at least for me. I get out of those good habits and things go wonky real quick. Shoot even exercise and nutrition just go right out of the window. And I lose my connection.

Love is such an important aspect of looking back and reflecting and forgiveness and regrets. If not dealt with in a loving fashion the results can be just not quite right or a downright catastrophe.

Someone coined the phrase “forgive and forget”. No. I really try to remember my history of past transgressions. Forget history and repeat the mistakes I say. But once you have really done your loving best to express and repent then remembering is sobering and not destructive.

I have heard it said that real insanity is doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different outcomes. I think it was Edison who said that he did not fail 1,000 times he just learned 1,000 ways not to do it. I bet he did not repeat any of them.

I was just thinking, which I know is dangerous, that a loving gratefulness helps us to recompense. That inexpressible pull that you get once you have gotten it is just amazing. Seems rather unlikely that we do that all the time.

Maybe my New Year’s resolution is to try harder to turn to the light of love. Although I am not sure it is something you can do by “trying”. More like what my son was talking about with the giving. We shall not pray for us to have more love, except for more love to give. Then it can multiply tenfold.

At any rate I implore you to resolve to both go backwards and forwards in love.

Comments

Mel Carriere from Snowbound and down in Northern Colorado on January 04, 2021:

I can't shout my comments across the lake at you any more because I pulled up roots and transferred to Colorado. I am no longer the Palm-tree Postman, I am now the snow-plow postman. Hence I have been away for a while, but am trying to get back in the groove now.

My New Year's resolution is trying to learn to adapt to this new version of Hub Pages.

Keep up the excellent preaching to the choir.

FlourishAnyway from USA on December 31, 2020:

So glad you are back with a positive message to start us off for 2021. A perfect message.

Peggy Woods from Houston, Texas on December 31, 2020:

What a perfect article to read as we end this year of 2020 and move forward to 2021. Learning how to forgive is important. "Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive others..." is in the Lord's Prayer. May your new year ahead be filled with many blessings.

John Hansen from Queensland Australia on December 31, 2020:

Welcome back buddy. As is the consensus here, you have been missed. This is the perfect message at the end of such a challenging year and needs to be reflected on. It is so true we shouldn’t just pray for “more love” as that is taking, we need to ask for “more love to give” and choose to spread that around everywhere we go.

Forgiveness is fortunately something I do easily (that doesn’t mean I forget or don’t have regrets) and I guess that is a good thing. Anyway, let’s grab this New Year by the collar and make it a good one.

manatita44 from london on December 31, 2020:

A fine piece of writing on topics which are essential at any given moment. Remembrance and renewal are always a great help. Much gratitude and a very hearty New Year to you and loved ones.

Ruby Jean Richert from Southern Illinois on December 31, 2020:

Eric, it good to see you writing again. I have missed you. Your sermon today is right-on. Hopefully we will have fewer regrets in the new year. Be well. Be happy.

Devika Primić from Dubrovnik, Croatia on December 31, 2020:

Eric Forgiveness is not easy for everyone, but in time I guess it can be possible. Happy New Year to you and family

KC McGee from Where I belong on December 31, 2020:

Eric, always glad to read your articles, but even better, I'm glad to see you back.

Eric Dierker (author) from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A. on December 31, 2020:

Chitrangada, all my best to you. Writing is my passion and with out it I have a hole inside. So it is very good to be back.

I look forward to catching up on my reading of your great contributions.

Eric Dierker (author) from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A. on December 31, 2020:

Whahoo! Mr. Happy we both made it through in fine fashion. I should tell you that I always appreciate your writings. So often insights that I have missed.

Chitrangada Sharan from New Delhi, India on December 31, 2020:

Beautiful message in your sermon. Forgiveness is for our own mental peace.

Good to see you publishing after a long time. Hope you are doing well.

Thank you for sharing and a Very Happy New Year to you and your family.

Mr. Happy from Toronto, Canada on December 31, 2020:

"We must first face our demons of the past year before we can turn and face our Lord." - I'll say this is very good advice simply to stay healthy (for those of us who are not "religulous" - reference to Bill Meher's documentary).

Well, thank You for the writings. Another year has gone, wish You many more to come! Stay sane and healthy. Happy New Year and all the very best!

P.S. Those two songs You chose are fabulous! Thanks for those too.

Eric Dierker (author) from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A. on December 31, 2020:

Pamela you are so right. It is hard to be joyous with burdens. Hey there are enough out there these days so we don't need any self made ones. Plus normally you get love back by sharing it in humility.

Pamela Oglesby from Sunny Florida on December 31, 2020:

This is a terrific message in your sermon Eric. I am glad you are writing again.

I use to carry resentments, but it made me feel miserable. When I chose to take my Christian beliefs more seriously I worked to forgive and to make amends to some people. I started feeling so much happier when I got through that time. I agree that the first of the year is a great time for a resolution. Your messages are always full of love, and I appreciate them always, my friend.

Eric Dierker (author) from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A. on December 31, 2020:

Wow Linda that was a really swell comment that adds much here. I thank you for your support during my hiatus. Love abounds in your home to mine.

Eric Dierker (author) from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A. on December 31, 2020:

bill that great concept of "One Day At A Time". Rings so true for me. Thank you for your support good friend it means much to me.

Eric Dierker (author) from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A. on December 31, 2020:

Ann we are so blessed every New Year. Hey we made it through the last and can look with hope to the future. It is very good to hear from you.

Linda Lum from Washington State, USA on December 31, 2020:

Eric, it's so good to have you back here. You've been missed, by me and you'll never know how many others.

You said something in this message that goes back to the Christmas story. You said that you don't love, but rather than you are "in love," that it is not just an action but a total experience. Now here's where I start to sound like my friend Eric, so stay with me. The phrase in the Bible is that Mary was "with child." I think you are "with love." Loves fills your being and is a part of you.

Welcome back.

Bill Holland from Olympia, WA on December 31, 2020:

Loved the message, one I try to live daily, salvation for me to do so, you know? Of course you do! Welcome back and Happy New Year, buddy!

Ann Carr from SW England on December 31, 2020:

Great message Eric. Great to see you back in good form. I shall make a concerted effort to take your advice.

Happy New Year!

Ann