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Why I Take a Day off Every Week

Techygran enjoys sharing current information to help herself and others delight in fully creative and healthy, comfortable lives.

Family Moments: Reflection on Blessings

Family Moments: Reflection on Blessings

Benefits of Taking a Day of Rest

When I grew up, all the stores in my small hometown closed down on Sundays (and I think perhaps on Wednesday afternoons). That meant that even if families didn't attend church, their parents were given "a day of rest" from their workplace. That was the law and that was the tradition.

Somewhere along the way there was an escalation of the need to buy, buy, buy and the 'day of rest' concept pretty much went out the window along with girdles, Easter bonnets, and Pepsodent toothpaste. Everybody's weekends became as crammed as their working week-- there were all the "wholesome groceries" to be purchased for the coming week, and often, 'organized' activities for children took place on the weekends (ballet lessons, soccer tournaments, school trips for example). And so it went.

With both parents working outside the home and the children needing "scheduling" of their events and activities, there was a pronounced shift in how families functioned and interacted. I grew up within a 25-mile radius of both sets of grandparents and all of my adult aunts and uncles and cousins. My children grew up in the 1970s and '80s, living a great distance from the majority of their relatives.

Life was chaotic. It continues to be... or it could be, if I choose.

What I discovered in my 30s is that part of God's plan for his children is that we keep that "day of rest" or Sabbath as it is called in reference to the 4th commandment in Exodus 20 that reads: "Remember the Sabbath Day, to keep it holy." Biblically, the Sabbath is a memorial of the six other days that He spent on creating our world, and every being that inhabits it.

Now, initially, it was my husband who went searching and discovered a community of believers who 'keep the Sabbath holy'. He began to stop doing anything of commercial nature, and any work-work on Saturdays. At first I found this monumentally inconvenient. I liked shopping on the weekends! I enjoyed partying with friends on Friday nights. It was, I thought then, a way to relax and release the stress of the past week. I even enjoyed all the kids' sporting events that sprawled across the weekends. I couldn't imagine why he wanted to be so weird, to stick out like a sore thumb, to bring on the wrath and contempt of so many people (like me) who didn't understand why he was 'bucking the trend'.

And so went our life over many years-- he with his loyalty to this Sabbath-keeping and me with my going about my usual lifestyle that was totally indistinguishable from 95% of all other twenty- and thirty-something adults when it came to the weekend. He didn't push. Off he went every Saturday to church in his suit and came home to hang out with us. I went with him on a couple of occasions, but it really wasn't my cup of tea, I'd decided. I heard some critical comments made about the denomination of my childhood and, although I no longer was active in that particular faith community, I took offence.

And So It Began...

I began to notice that I was married to an exceptionally kind and generous man. While my childhood and college friends were going through marriage breakdowns and divorces, my husband patiently and lovingly continued to treat me like the love of his life, even though I did some pretty nasty and shameful things (to "test him" I thought). And I over-worked, over-ate, smoked and drank, all the while thinking that I was living a great fullsome life. I got sick a lot. I had no energy. I feared death and had a painfully challenging relationship with a family member.

I started to align myself with some of his beliefs-- I began to see the blessings in laying all the cares of the week aside and just delighting in the rest and peace of the Sabbath day. I didn't immediately start attending church with him, but I did stop shopping and going out to Friday night parties, plays, movies, etc. I made other health-related changes in my life that increased my confidence and self-esteem. I dipped into the Bible.

At some point I commenced Bible studies I was invited to. I remember telling a group of women around my friend's dining table that eventually I knew I would be joining my husband at church, that I was being pulled in that direction, and that I was lonely for his company (and knew that he must also be lonely for mine). A few of them had husbands who were unbelievers and they were hoping for the same decisions from their partners.

And so, not long after my disclosure to my group of women friends, in the late winter, a pattern of going to church with him developed. He told me later that he thought that it was just a sort of one-off and that eventually I would stop coming, as I had before. I went with him to a Valentine's dinner at the church hall-- a big step for me because I felt like I was under a magnifying glass at these sorts of functions, like his "bad wife". Guilt. The pastor and his wife were very outreaching and friendly. My heart was touched by their conversations with me. I continued to go to church. His pastor said, "Hey, I notice that C. is coming every week to church" and my husband said, "Yeah, I wonder what's going on" in a sort of joking way. The pastor said, "It's the Holy Spirit drawing her". When my husband told me this later I was absolutely flabbergasted... not once in my upbringing or Bible Study experience had anyone talked about this very personal manner in which God in the Holy Spirit would court me. I'm still amazed when I think about it all these years later. That was the clincher-- I gave my life over to Something Bigger than I, repented of my sins, and was baptized.

I felt very blessed by the privilege of worshipping in fellowship with members of a lovely, giving Christian community. And there was a great deal of peacefulness in being spiritually in simpatico with my life partner. A marriage that is physically, financially and mentally satisfying still has a big hole in it if there is not the spiritual one-ness that comes from believing in the same loving God. I have come to understand that the God I used to think was restricting, angry, punitive and distant is the loving Parent, Partner, Friend I could never have in this old world we live in (none of us can have that 'perfect' earthly parent). The God I love and who loves me truly wants me to live an abundant and positively effective life-- His followers are not judged worthy based on their smoochy gestures of love, business acumen, sharp wit, flawless, never-aging, movie star good looks, or family background but on their willingness to give up their old life for one where the outward signs of their being "all in" are: joy, peace, patiently hanging in there through thick and thin, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control.

And, yes, the Sabbath is a very important 24-hour period in the week for me-- a day of rest and a time to fellowship with other like-believers, an opportunity to enjoy family, reach out to others in need, and focus on delighting in the One who delights in me. The parameters of sunset to sunset mean that wherever I am in the world I can unapologetically pause and enjoy my rest in the Lord. I highly recommend "taking a day off".

I am "retired" now from full-time employment but anyone who is also retired knows that that word is fairly deceptive. I feel like I have quite a few opportunities for a chaotic life if I so choose. I have lots of hobbies and interests and passions, and there seems to be an event and activity every day in our community (and online, of course) to pursue something I thoroughly enjoy. So "taking a day of rest" is as important in my 70's as it was when I was in my "fully-employed" 40s.

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Fellowship with Believers

  • The Sabbath Potluck (Fellowship Meal)
    "Breaking bread together" is a Biblical concept-- when you eat together on a Sabbath you have the opportunity to get to know each other over good healthy, vegetarian food, being both physically and socially nurtured!

Here are some of the benefits for us mature individuals in taking a day off from the normal routine, to observe the Sabbath:

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  • Relationship-Building: Jesus is all about relationships. If you do a thorough reading of the Bible you will find that Jesus was intent on serving others and building the kind of loving friendships that developed into 'eternal' relationships.
  • The Sabbath Day can involve unplugging from the devices and all your normal pursuits to spend in quality one-on-one with your spouse, kids, grandkids, siblings, parents, and the people who stand in for those originals in your life (neighbors, housemates, church family, colleagues, etc.) Make it a special 'relationship' day first and you will be blessed. You might (like my husband did for 23 years) go off to Church by yourself, but you don't have to be 'alone' through the day. My husband never went to people's homes for lunch until I became a Church member and then the invitations were abundant! I asked a couple we got to know if they could demonstrate/tell us about how they spend a Sabbath. They willingly did that and we walked along the river, had a very exciting 'word study' using reference books I had never seen before, did a nature jigsaw with their young kids, talked about our spiritual experiences and a variety of other things (as happens in 'families') and of course ate and prayed together. There is opportunity to really notice the positives about your family members and express your appreciation. Studies show that couples that spend quality time together (however you define that) are likely closer and feel more love, experience less depression, and are feel more supported to take care of their physical and mental health. Love and Hope are spin-offs for everyone when even one person sets aside mere moments to be fully present for a significant other.
  • Gratitude: I know that I fully intend to keep a daily gratitude or blessing list, but the fact is that I don't-- I forget. I get caught up in the news, the aches and pains, the jokes, the household and yard chores, Facebook, the problems besetting my kids in their adult lives, worries... well, you know. Imagine a full day where you are oriented towards thankfulness-- for coming through a tough week, for answered prayer, for a spiritual message from the speaker that touched you in a meaningful way, for relaxation in great company, for the multitude of other blessings and love of a caring God and from a "family" of fellow believers. Expressing gratitude, or thanksgiving, is shown in studies to enhance mental and emotional wellbeing-- the grateful (thankful) person is more likely to have a positive attitude towards others, mostly perceiving them as acting in benevolence. This, of course, results in more feelings of gratitude. Very win-win. An excellent re-charge for the week to come.
  • Joy: In a church we attended, a time for Praise and Petitions (Prayer) was slotted into the pre-Message portion of the Service. Everyone strove for spiritual communion (as I perceived it). Children and the old shared requests for prayer and shared their glad tidings as well. People who were previously guarded, even curmudgeonly, at the outset, not trusting these "strangers", began to talk about the sorrows, concerns and joys in their lives. They invited others to take up their load with them. We praised God and rejoiced with each other when the previous week's or previous year's prayer request had been answered-- often in amazing, unforeseen ways. Joy is an outflow of gratitude, or perhaps huge and sustaining bursts of grateful feelings. Joy is different from happiness, just as sadness and depression are often quite different beasts. Sabbath is a day to push aside all the normal mundane nitpicky concerns (yes, even housework, yay!) and just focus on inflating the joy in your life-- or maybe being aware of the joy in your life is a better description.
Visiting the grieving is one thing we can do that will bless both the visitor and the visited.

Visiting the grieving is one thing we can do that will bless both the visitor and the visited.

Sabbath Activities

  • Feasting with God: Although some people might find this a foreign idea, or maybe even repugnant (depending on your past associations to God), the Sabbath is really a day that you can get right down to this most special of relationships. When I began to experience the messages that the Holy Word has, seemingly, just for me, I became increasingly unwilling to miss an opportunity to spend in Bible study, devotion, worship, contemplation... This day is a divine appointment with the Author of All Creation who will put your trolley back on the rails for the coming week. The Bible, of course, has great value as a builder of neural pathways as we age. Engaging in a group Bible Study on Sabbath is a very mentally-stimulating activity, and well worth getting up early for. And listening to beautiful classical and sacred music, or lighter, uplifting praise music (whatever your preference) is certainly a treat for the emotional side of our being. Too, singing in church is often the only chance many of us will take to sing in public. This is enriching on many levels: certainly kicks in the endorphins and shreds down stress and depression, and again, those neural pathways are being built. As seniors we should be looking for ways to tear down some of our destructive habits (smoking, over-eating, criticism) and replacing them, building up the positive, Godly 'neural superhighways'. Sunset to sunset with God once a week will certainly help with this process!
  • Offering Service: Sometimes we can lose a sense of what our purpose is on this planet. No, it's not the old saw, "He wins who collects the most toys before he dies." We are definitely meant to serve our fellows, particularly those who are having struggles of one sort or other. Sabbath is a day to extend yourself to show kindness and care to others... this could mean "work" (shock!) but not the money-grubbing kind of work most of us are used to. Works of mercy and compassion use the template Jesus modeled for us... visiting the sick, persons in nursing homes, hospitals, jails, counseling with a single mom having a tough time with her toddlers, soaking up impish giggles with a toddler who doesn't seem able to keep out of trouble... these are some examples. The assets for us older folks in serving others are manifold: we have increased self-worth, feel happier, make friends, model altruism for our younger "family" members who will feel more connected to us, and that all goes back to the 'relationship' advantages listed at the outset here. Serving others for free also means that we are advantaging the people we serve with positive feelings of gratitude and hope and love, and we are gifting to our local government--social services, health services-- care hours that they would ordinarily have to pay for. An example of this is in our local town where several churches operate a soup kitchen. 200 volunteers provide 22,000 manhours of service each year. 22,000 X $10/hour=$220,000 in wages. Demonstrating caring to others can be a huge mental/emotional boost for those of us who no longer have careers or profitable jobs (which often defines who we are).

COVID-19 Easter Sabbath Message and Communion with Pastor Rhoda Klein-Miller

Sabbath During COVID-19 Isolation and Social Distancing

In the end of March, 2020, there was a stern recommendation against gathering in large groups since these gatherings resulted in the Coronavirus being passed about. Most Sabbath-observing churches opted to cancel physically assembling and began conducting church online.

While we have been told this was disappointing and lonely for many older folks who looked forward to their face-to-face meetings with friends and family at church, it was also an opportunity to reflect on one's spiritual journey with a peacefulness that is not generally available in the weekly hustle. In strokes of pleasing serendipity, older and marginalized members report enjoying more visits by ministers and other church volunteers. There is a mass of online services and other programs available. Many people have shared how much they enjoy not having to get dressed up to go out but can stay home close to their family members, or spend uninterrupted time in Bible study and reading.

Many churches have gone to bat to produce wonderfully inspiring Sabbath programs with high tech music and even, as in the case of the Easter sermon at Oakridge Adventist Church in Vancouver, BC (above), an opportunity to have communion right in your living room with the 'wine' and 'bread' of your choice. I was very blessed by Pastor Rhoda Klein-Miller's sermon explaining the true meaning of 'Common Union' as represented at the Last Supper, and the uplifting music by the praise band done in a multi-segmented screen with the Zoom app. I invite you to listen to the sermon and music above. I hope you are blessed!

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Sabbath is for All God's People

In the Biblical Book by Mark, chapter 2, verse 27, "Then Jesus said to them, “The Sabbath was made to meet the needs of people, and not people to meet the requirements of the Sabbath." (The Living Translation). The Sabbath is a free gift from the God who created it. If you don't align with the beliefs in this article, you can still enjoy all the benefits of a weekly day away from preoccupations with work, money-making, shopping, and the thousands of other activities and distractions that get in the way of authentic peace and joy.

Here are some ideas for trying a "Month of Sabbaths":

  • You could engage with a particular religious organization that you think you would like to know more about. You could speak to people you know who are part of that organization and ask questions. Or just do internet research.
  • You could just arrange with yourself/your family to take one day a week to set aside to explore a regular day of rest each week for a month. Contract with yourself to try at least a month of these set-aside days (4-5) and journal as you go. Use the day for whatever you might define as "sacred" activity-- generally something where you "give back" or do something with a group or community that embodies healthy or inspiring or kind/helpful ideals/activities.
  • You could make this a "nature" day each week where you contract to leave your ordinary routines and have a mini Earth Day doing something beneficial for your local parks, beaches, forests, etc.-- appreciating nature with hikes or walks with family/friends is another idea.
  • If you are an Adventist who finds yourself (perhaps) outside of traditional thought/practice, and think you would like to connect with a "progressive" Sabbath-keeping online community, please read more about AdventistToday Sabbath Seminars here and join the conversation from anywhere on the planet 10:30 AM Pacific Time Saturday.

Comments

Cynthia Zirkwitz (author) from Vancouver Island, Canada on November 25, 2014:

Dear Au fait, Thank you so much for your lovely comments here. I feel very much humbled by them, given the fine application of your writing gifts.

I'm so sorry to have lost your fellowship in the faith-- perhaps it is worth it to take a look at with fresh eyes? I won't harp at you here, but I must say that I can certainly see the influence of your Sabbath-Keeper background in your topics and content. Keep it up! I plan to read all of what you have written. ~Cynthia

C E Clark from North Texas on November 23, 2014:

It's surprising to me how many people do not know the difference between the true Sabbath that God created, blessed, and sanctified, and the Lord's Day that the papacy created and probably blessed, etc. Of course they do not realize either, that the last day of the week, the 7th day, is Saturday.

I loved those potluck dinners! Our pastor always said that Adventists are the best cooks in the world. Cooking yummy and healthful before healthful was cool. :)

Yes, alas I am a backslider.

This is a great article. Those people who observe God's Sabbath that He has blessed and sanctified will receive a blessing. So glad you wrote about this, and you have presented it so well.

Long comments are appreciated by HP. At least 3 good sentences or as much more as you wish, although I think they cut a person off at 750 words or so. I don't remember for sure, but it's around that number -- I've hit it more than once. ;) Just the right subject can get my keyboard going . . . Length of comments naturally affects one's comment level status. Feel free to write as much as you like in my comment sections.

Cynthia Zirkwitz (author) from Vancouver Island, Canada on September 10, 2014:

Thank you MsDora-- you encourage me! I appreciate your being the first commenter for this piece. I am going to read it over again and see if I need to apply some of the tips you provided in your article about Christian writing.

Dora Weithers from The Caribbean on September 10, 2014:

In total agreement that "keeping the Sabbath has far-ranging benefits." Logical--after six days of work we need some rest; psychological--the emotional state improves after a spiritual refreshing; and theological--God blessed and sanctified the day. I vouch for every one of the benefits you listed. Thank you for sharing this excellent presentation. Voted Up and Sharing!

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