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A Little Help


By gossiping, or rumors, we in effect, lose our integrity, and power.

Before engaging in idle chat about others, ask yourself these questions:

"What is the purpose behind me telling this story to this person?"

"Who benefits in positive ways when I tell it?"

"Will it hurt, or harm someone?"

"Is it even true?"

Is It True?

We've all heard it, most of us may have even participated in it, and some us have even been the object of it.

What is it? Simply put... gossip, and rumors.

The definition of gossip: idle talk, or rumor, about the personal, or private affairs of others.

Definition of rumor: tale of events circulating from person to person.

Why do we gossip? What is to be gained from it?

We gossip because of our own insecurities, and we try to gain power by doing it. By focussing on others lives, we can ignore our own faults, and issues.

Before engaging in the 'chat circle', ask yourself is this true?

Is It Necessary?

After all the chat has gone through the office, you find out there was NO truth in the story. You've heard it, believed, and maybe even laughed about it. Did you help spread the untruth?

Who was hurt? What was the fallout? Why did it start in the first place? Who gained from it?

Somewhere along the way, you've discovered that the chat is true.

Does everyone really NEED to know? Do you really need to know? Is it affecting you in some negative way? Is it affecting you personally at all?

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Holding your own integrity is necessary. Only you can affect that part of the outcome. Do not engage in the behavior. Politely excuse yourself, and continue on your way.

Is It Kind?

Definition of Kind: generous, helpful, and thinking about other people's feelings.

The majority of us would like to fall in this category. Do we? Do you?

Easiest paths of Kindness:

  1. Be honest.
  2. Non Judgemental. Accept each others differences.
  3. Be compassionate. We all have a story, and we all have joy, pain, happiness, and sadness.

Only you can be responsible for your integrity and honor.


Where do you stand?

In the comments

How do you hold your integrity?

What do you do when the rumor mill makes it to you?

© 2018 Shaunna Jones Leclair


threekeys on March 25, 2018:

Dashingscorpio I think everyone cares whether they are liked or not unless you are someone highly resourced and/or use force or intimidation to get someone to like you. This kind of like is fear based and not genuine liking. Humans are animals that like their herd or tribe. I believe the three things that connects one to another is to be able to confide, receive support and hence feel that they belong.

dashingscorpio from Chicago on March 25, 2018:

Gossip is many people's favorite pastime.

This true whether it's a few friends gathered around a table sipping on tea or reading tabloid newspapers about the lives of celebrities. Many people are either bored with their own lives and looking for a distraction or they want to feel like they're doing better than others. "Did you hear about? "You won't believe this.."

Bottom line is gossip is here to stay. They will always be "haters".

The people most affected are those who want to (fit in) or honestly care about what others think in their social circle.

True freedom comes from not caring what other people think as you continue to (be yourself). Life is a (personal) journey.

"If you live for people's acceptance, you'll die from their rejection "

- Lecrae

Shaunna Jones Leclair (author) from Spruce Grove on March 22, 2018:

Great article Alan! It pretty much focusses on what I also believe. That is, we can change our patterns of speech. :)

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