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Why do Men Cheat in Relationships?

I am Mrs Lawretta Ayodeji; a minister of God with a Law degree. A lover of Jesus Christ. I love life and live it to the full God's way


It is no news that some men delight or derive pleasure in cheating on their spouse whilst in a loving relationship. There has to be something that makes a man stray even when things look good in the home front.

Seriously guys, I have seen relationships that looked like they were designed from heaven, having a perfectly independent and nurturing spouse yet over time we learn that the man (her husband) is consistently cheating on his family whilst living the dream life most men crave.

Sometimes you could conclusively say that cheating maybe engraved in some men’s DNA. In the sense that it does not matter how loving, caring and beautiful a man’s wife is; if the spirit of cheating is engulfed in his DNA he would cheat.

So the question now is; why do men cheat? What is it with most guys that make it difficult for them to concentrate their time, money and energy on the woman they claim to love rather than chasing around anything on shirt? Again, why do men cheat?!

Some say it is because they are unhappy with the marriage or relationship due to the lack of attention or sex or even love from their spouse, while others blame it on boredom. That is; that they are sometimes tired of sleeping with the same woman over and over and over again, and so they would love to try something new every now and again. But I call that selfish thinking because the girl too may as well be tired of your usual, regular, same format, pattern and style of sex but you see because of her commitment to the family, she endures it. For men who blame their cheating habits on the lack of love and attention from their spouse, i would recommend that you have a sit down talk with your spouse about your feeling and also try being romantic with her, just maybe that should stir up something in her that would bring back the love and attention you guys once enjoyed.

In conclusion, I will say that men cheat for selfish reasons. Men who cheat on their spouse are self-centered maroons who think of themselves only ignoring every other person around them. What is good for the Goose is also good for the gander. God bless you


dashingscorpio from Chicago on December 30, 2020:

" I will say that men cheat for selfish reasons."

That's true of both men and women cheaters!

Neither gender is standing on "holy ground".

Cheating is a selfish act no matter if you're talking about a card game or infidelity in relationships. It's all about having more.

The goal of most cheaters is to hold onto all that is "good" in their primary relationship while addressing their other "needs" on the side. Very cheaters are looking to (replace) one relationship with another. They want to {complement or add to} what they already have. If things were horrible in their relationship they'd leave it.

There are three basic types of cheaters

{The Incessant/Serial Cheater}

This type of cheater has never been faithful in any long-term relationship. They get bored very easily and are always on the lookout for the thrill that comes with being with someone new.

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The only reason why someone like this signs up for monogamy is (because the person they desired) expects or requires it.

Monogamy for this type of cheater is the equivalent of going on a very strict diet.

It's not a matter of if but rather when they will cheat. Their unspoken motto is: "Variety is the spice of life!"

Generally you see more of this type of cheater while they are in their teens and up to their early 30s.

{The Unbelievable Opportunity Cheater}

This person is not proactively looking to cheat. Immaturity, impulsiveness, and happenstance are usually contributing factors.

In some instances they may have a secret crush on a stranger they see on the subway, at Starbucks, a co-worker, or an ex they still have feelings for. One day out of the blue the object of their hidden affection hits on them or circumstances present an opportunity to turn their fantasy into reality. Having a "girls night out" or a girl's weekend getaway mixed with alcohol can create temptation.

This momentary lapse in judgment sometimes weighs upon these types of cheaters especially if they genuinely care deeply for their partner. It's not uncommon for this type of cheater to sometimes confess to cheating without being suspected or confronted to rid themselves of the guilt they're carrying around.

{The Discontented Cheater}

This person blames you!

If you had not done or stopped doing whatever, they would have never stepped outside of the relationship.

A lot of betrayed people buy into this belief because if it was their fault it means if they can prevent it from happening again.

Some people choose to see their partner as being a "pawn" who was manipulated by the "other man" or "other woman".

The reality is both cheating and monogamy are choices the individual makes. People do whatever they want to do.

The only person you can control is yourself!

Why ask why?

Truth be told if someone has decided cheating is a "deal breaker", asking why is simply a reflex rhetorical question.

They really don't care about why and there is nothing the cheater can say that would justify their actions in their mind

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