Updated date:

Why are You Still Single? 53 Funny Reasons To Explain Why You Are Single

StricktlyDating is an Australian writer who creates pages of original funny quotes and status updates.

Here you’ll find over 53 funny explanations as to why you are single.

Why I am single.

Why I am single.

Why am I single?

  1. You're single because you're not in a relationship with someone who agrees that they're in a relationship with you (and you never have been).
  2. You're single because you've just split up with someone. Yesterday.
  3. You're single because you're not over your ex from 3 years ago... You worry your heart might be broken for life.
  4. You're single because the one you want is already taken. And you're not even next in line.
  5. You're single because you're in love with a celebrity who doesn't even know you exist, despite you retweeting their every status on a daily basis for the past 12 months, or more.
  6. You're single because you're really good at staying single.
  7. You're single because you are taking some time to "find yourself", and you are enjoying what you are finding immensely.
  8. You're single because you're focusing on your career for now.
  9. You're single because no one has asked you out EVER! And you know that there's a high possibility no one ever will.
  10. You're single because you're a weekend alcoholic.
  11. You're single because the one you want to be with doesn't want to be with you. Ever!
  12. You're single because you were just too hot for your last boyfriend/girlfriend.
  13. You're single because you want to be free. At least on the weekends.
  14. You're single because that's just the way you roll.
  15. You're single because your boyfriend/girlfriend went away and never came back.
  16. You're single because you are self-isolating and never go anywhere to meet any one. And you wouldn't have anything to wear if you did.
  17. You're single because all the good one's are taken. By your friends.
  18. You're single because you let a good one get away. Probably more than one actually!
  19. You're single because you're waiting to meet someone really special. Or someone who will at least speak to you occasionally.
  20. You're single because you love to mingle. You were pretty much born to flirt!
  21. You're single because you're hoping your ex will want you back some day. Like even when you're both 80 years old.
  22. You're single because your ex ran off with someone else when you weren't looking.
  23. You're single because you don't want a relationship until you're older. Like 50 years old.
  24. You're single because you kissed on the first date. And it was awkward.
  25. You're single because you're taking a break from relationships and they are also taking a nice long break from you.
  26. You're single because it's your bad choice.
  27. You're single because you are not very good at relationships. Like even with your cat.
  28. You're single because you're last relationship has turned you off all relationships, possibly for life.
  29. You're single because you didn't take your last relationship seriously.
  30. You're single because you push people away with your insecurities.
  31. You're single because you've cheated on everyone you've been in a relationship with. You just can't help it.
  32. You're single because you're too picky.
  33. You're single because you don't know how to let people in.
  34. You're single because you're ugly. And you have a really old fashioned hair style.
  35. You're single because you're a liar. Your pants are on fire!
  36. You're single because it's lots of fun.
  37. You're single because you can't buy love.
  38. You're single because you don't treat people as good as they would treat you if you treated them well.
  39. You're single because you don't take someone on proper dates.
  40. You're single because you're far too awesome for a relationship.
  41. You're single because the only person who's ever asked you out was as old as your grandma.
  42. You're single because you are an emotional ice berg. Like in the middle of a big frozen lake. In the South Pole.
  43. You're single because it doesn't count when you're dating yourself.
  44. You're single because you keep choosing your mums lamb roast over a date.
  45. You're single because you're extremely out of fashion. Like your still wearing Crocs. And striped knitted vests. And wear hair gel.
  46. You're single because you're concentrating on world peace.
  47. You're single because you sleep with 4 smelly dogs in your bed and a cat on your head.
  48. You're single because you fell in love with your boat.
  49. You're single because you're metro and this confuses both genders.
  50. You're single because you dropped a mirror 7 years ago and you're still having bad luck.
  51. You’re single because you were practicing social distancing before it was even considered cool to do so.
  52. You’re single because you’re too shy to try online dating.
  53. You’re single because you haven’t yet realised what an absolutely fabulous catch you are.

So what if you're single right now? Since you are alive there is a chance (statistically, more in your favour than not) that some one will want to try to put an end to your single status one day!



why-you-are-single
why-you-are-single
why-you-are-single
why-you-are-single
why-you-are-single

Reader Poll

© 2011 StrictlyQuotes

Comments:

peachy from Home Sweet Home on November 14, 2014:

i have 5 friends and my brother in law are still single, they are in their mid 40's. Almost have of your reasons fitted them

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on April 29, 2013:

Thanks for commenting Amanda, lovely of you :)

Amanda Jones on April 26, 2013:

Thank you! It is Very interesting and useful information! I would like that there were less single people in the world.

Michelle Dee from Charlotte, NC on July 15, 2012:

Yes, yes, and yes LOL.

Voted up, funny, awesome.

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on June 26, 2012:

I've been there too barry1001!

barry1001 from North Wales on June 26, 2012:

Very Funny, voted up.

For me 22, 26 and 27

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on June 16, 2012:

bummer!

Lulu luvs u on January 24, 2012:

I am single cuz reason 40 :P And cuz my ex broke up wit me four days after my b day!

Camo Girl!! on January 06, 2012:

I Hope She Does Too!!!

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on January 06, 2012:

Well, I hope she finds someone better real soon ;)

Camo Girl!! on January 05, 2012:

She Is My Sister And She is still in love with her EX boyfriend who she broke up with over 4 years ago that is why she is still single!!!

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on January 05, 2012:

Pretty cool reasons Mira!

Mira on January 04, 2012:

I'm single because of 3,4, and 7....

Camo Girl!! on January 03, 2012:

Yep I Know!!!

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on January 03, 2012:

They're pretty good reasons to be single Camo Girl :)

Camo Girl!!! on January 01, 2012:

I Am Single Because Reasons 9 And 1....

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on December 12, 2011:

That's very nice to know KeithTax, and thanks for stopping bye, best wishes!

Keith Schroeder from Wisconsin on December 11, 2011:

With 23 years of marriage (to the same woman) and still counting, I found some of the reasons funny and some concerning. But #26 is the real reason someone is single. When you are ready that special someone will appear.

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on December 05, 2011:

I must admit quite a few of these are from my own experiences too ;)

Robert Erich from California on December 05, 2011:

You know, about 30 of these have been true in my case at one time or another. Great summary of virtually every reason one might not be in a relationship. Thanks for sharing!

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on November 12, 2011:

Haha, love it Alastar!

Alastar Packer from North Carolina on November 12, 2011:

Forty wicked true reasons why ones single! Looks like you've 'bout covered em all Strickly. I'll just add: Your single because you've given up on first dates!!!

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on November 12, 2011:

Haha, so true Winsome! And glad you found this fun ;)

Winsome from Southern California by way of Texas on November 11, 2011:

Or you're single because you are waiting for someone who is "strictly dating."

Fun hub, SD =:)

Alice Alfonsi from Rome, Italy on November 05, 2011:

You're welcome! ;)

Angel709 from midwest on November 04, 2011:

You're welcome Stricktlydating, and I appreciate the one-liners and your reason for listing the hub in that manner...it also made it easy to digest and pick my favorites at a glance.

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on November 04, 2011:

Thanks for your comment Alice! I've updated it too ;)

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on November 04, 2011:

Not a fan of one-liners Bob? They're one liners so they can be shared on Facebook & Twitter status ;)

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on November 04, 2011:

Thanks for your comment Angel709, I love being single too!

Alice Alfonsi from Rome, Italy on November 04, 2011:

Made me feel amused and sad at the same time. ;)

Anyway, reasons number 8 and 15 are the same.

diogenes on November 03, 2011:

"You're single because you think a list of one-liners constitutes an HP article." Need I say more? Bob

Angel709 from midwest on November 03, 2011:

I'd have to say at least five of these are suitable to why I'm single....and loving it!

Thanks for the article.

Related Articles