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What to Do When Someone Dislikes You for No Reason at All

Handling different people was an eye-opener for Tonette to see the need to educate others more on the aspect of self-awareness.


It's true that people who state the opposite vibration to ours in any situation make us feel bad. If we've done nothing wrong, where on earth would those people get the right to dislike us?

If you are the kind of individual who constantly looks for every mistake or focuses on the negative, and makes up drama, then people might probably just have the right not to like you.

But why do certain people create barriers? For what reason would they decide to ignore anyone for no apparent reason?

When someone dislikes you, don't panic.

Agree That Not Everyone Will Like You

The notion that everyone will like everyone seems not happening all the time. While all can be nice, it's unavoidable that you will encounter people who will not like you. The reason is because you have different values.


There may be those who don't look in spite of you smiling at them. Some even purposely look away. So you start telling yourself, "If they don't like me, so what?" or "If I can't win them, why should I worry?"... But the truth is, you struggle with it because it affects you.

These are actually very few people, but even if they are few, it's kind of creepy since you don't really understand what you did to them. Agreeing that not everyone will like you helps save your emotion out of the situation. That may even result in getting along better through the less impact of judging the person right away.

They Need Your Understanding

People have the tendency to be highly insecure that often the conclusion where the other person may have better attributes is a thing they don't want to acknowledge. It's normal for everyone to experience insecurity or a feeling of being inadequate in some way, but too much social anxiety can lead to hatred of others.

Try thinking from the other person's position that you may understand her emotions and logic. The feeling of "insecurity" typically arises from the inklings of whether one measures up to an imposed ideal. It may be due to life circumstances, divorce, financial issues, or worst is depression.

Considering the feelings of others helps you make the situation better. You may have some other feelings for that person than anger. A dose of self-assurance sparks optimism and even radiates to people who are in dire need of it.


Accept the Hater

There's a saying that goes, Respond kindly or don't respond at all.

It’s difficult to offer compassion to someone who treats you with unkindness, right? Well, you can close your eyes to things you don't want to see, but you can't close your heart to things you don't want to feel. The best way you can save your senses is to stop being offended.

If you know the offender personally, give credence to the goodness of the person. It's him or her you want to appreciate and not the unacceptable ways. Know that it's okay to feel deeply, provided you don't let it get out of control. Knowing when to give things a push forward and when to accept them as they are is a great consolation.

Shifting the senses this way prevents accumulating a smoldering resentment within you. It is the key to your relationship with others. Did you know that this is a woman's strongest defense against disappointment?

Boost Yourself


If you look at the bigger picture, reality will tell you that haters are almost inevitable. A positive escape is to pursue your own self-development. This duplicates positive energy that brings tranquility. Remember that what brings meaning in your life responds to vibrations that make you feel mentally and emotionally intact.

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Don't take it personally or it will teach your heart to hate. Even if someone doesn't like you if your positive and forward energy is at the strongest, you will vibrate at your best which in turn raises you to the top.

Should you stop being nice to the people who do not reciprocate?


Even if they don't reciprocate, it's best to still be polite to them. Being nice is a personality attribute of every individual and you don't have to change that just because they didn't answer. Instead, associate with those who value you more, and when that "someone who made you feel bad" asks for assistance, don't turn him down.

They will regret it, in the long run when they realize the cold-shoulder they give towards you.

Where the Problem Arises

The problem comes when you start to make even and give back the hard feelings.

Be wary and guard your point of view. Reciprocating is a very human thing. However, the moment you give in to the feeling of hurt, anger, or revenge; you also begin giving in to the qualms of that person.

Don't allow disappointment to deter you. If your opportunities for forming good ties are limited, you can't afford to let one slip.

Choose to smile anyway and use your energy to clear out everything that’s wrong. Disappointment is not yours. Earn self-esteem, commit to being your best, take a deep breath, and think beautiful. Now congratulate yourself for learning the ability to do what is right.


Why Must You Understand?

If you ponder upon Mother Teresa's Do It Anyway, it's a beautiful encouragement that teaches on the value of discernment. Offering some effort to make it happen builds harmony in every situation.

The next time someone dislikes you, try putting yourself in the individual's position that you may learn to love the person a little more. There is one strong reason that you must do this - they needed you to help them understand what friends and family are for.

© 2012 Tonette Fornillos


Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on March 28, 2013:

Blessings Max! I'm sorry about the things you're going through now. No one is sure how far things like this would bring the world. I hope and pray your people will come to terms with your government. I'll be visiting the link and I wish you all PEACE. May GOD be upon you. :=)

Max on March 27, 2013:

This is what i feel about our government that hate all of us they want us all dead please look up infowars . com

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on July 23, 2012:

So true Nomascus, and this is where we needed even the lightest whiff of positiveness. "Interactions between people are one of the most complicated thing, and also one of the simplest thing on earth." - Your words are full of wisdom. Thanks for reading and for sharing. Best wishes!

Nomascus concolor from A Country called Earth on July 23, 2012:

Hi Tonipet! Thanks for these useful advises - it can be a tough battle not to be affected by someone not liking you. Interactions between people are one of the most complicated thing, and also one of the simplest thing on earth.

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on July 10, 2012:

Hello there. I'm with you in the hopes that people can be more understanding. If that happens there can be harmony in the middle of those varying needs. You cited the importance of "understanding" as our best gear to accepting what seems "on a twist" of interest. Thank you for the engaging thoughts. Such are words of wisdom! Best Regards Don.

DON BALDERAS on July 10, 2012:

People meet a variety of people with varying needs, profile, and what-not. Mature people understand uniqueness, and understanding means acceptance. They also breeze differently and their presence creates somehow the 'wind of change' for them to follow through. I hope many people will be more understanding and accepting.

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on July 08, 2012:

Perhaps the most difficult thing in this world is to live in pretense. You're right, I think we all would agree better to be hated for who we are than to be loved for who we're not. I so agree with you. Thanks for sharing and for the wonders of Jesus' love.

Maria Magdalena Ruiz O'Farrill from Borikén the great land of the valiant and noble Lord on July 08, 2012:

Sadly to say but I prefer to be hated for who I am than love for who I am not. Voted up and more for mending my heart...ok Jesus mended it but He also uses know that our hearts breaks from time to time until He comes back for us.

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on June 22, 2012:

Hello Carly,

You're so sweet Carly, thank you. Truly it's calming to give our mind, heart and body, the peace it needs before taking a night's sleep. I'm glad you find the hub insightful. Pls keep coming back. Nice meeting you and keep up!

Carly Sullens from St. Louis, Missouri on June 21, 2012:

I needed to read this tonight. Thank you for writing this topic that can be so abstract with feelings and making it concrete and manageable. You helped me feel at peace before I go to bed tonight.

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on June 08, 2012:

Hi Crystna,

I can say it’s the best thing you’ve done - staying true to yourself and those that have loved you for what you are. You're just amazing! Thank you for the line of votes!

Hello prairieprincess,

Understanding perhaps is what people are in dire need of to stay away from feeling bad about each other’s mistakes. After all, no one’s perfect. So happy to have you here. Blessings, as well.

Hi Audrey,

I don’t know why I am happy after doing something good to others, especially to old people and children. Maybe just a part of me that I can say has grown up, I thank God for this. Glad you’ve dropped by and shared. God bless you!

Audrey Howitt from California on June 08, 2012:

A really good hub about the need for empathy---

Sharilee Swaity from Canada on June 08, 2012:

Tonipet, what a positive, uplifting piece! I appreciate your wisdom and it is so true that we do not have to feel anything in our heart. Thanks for this! Blessings!

And this needs to be shared. I am doing so.

Crystna1985 on June 06, 2012:

You have amazing writing skills! I really hate it when people don't like me but over the years i've realized what people think of me is out of my control,so i just stay true to myself and those that love me, love me for me:) thanks for posting! voted up,interesting,useful and awesome!!

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on June 06, 2012:

Hi Spy. Thank you. It's more than great having you stopped by. Really appreciate it. Blessings!

DragonBallSuper on June 06, 2012:

great article you have here.

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on June 06, 2012:

Hi Joanna. After a day's work would be a beautiful home and family to come home too. Surely would ease your cares away. Thank you for dropping by. Keep up!

Joanna Chandler from On Planet Earth on June 06, 2012:

Very interesting and insightful hub :)

Thanks for sharing. I love your pictures also

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on June 05, 2012:

bmcoll - I love big dogs and shepherd is on top of my list, now my hub model, thanks to Ray :=). The quote is too deep for a neophyte haha but pondering on it is a wow...and much more worth the effort. To a couple with a wield handle, thanks for visiting. Cheers B and M!

bmcoll3278 on June 05, 2012:

Another great hub, How did you get the picture at the top of my boss with me in his chops lol. I like to say.

" A great attitude will not solve all your problems , but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort."

Miss Kate000 on June 04, 2012:

First of all i have to say I love love love all your pictures! They are simply adorable. Well done on the hub, it has some great advice in it.

Joseph De Cross from New York on June 03, 2012:

Salamat amiga! Au revoir!

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on June 03, 2012:

Thank you Lord de Cross. Would love to get infected with your pleasant way of writing. I'm glad you liked this article. Everyone is so caught-up with the kitten-turned-lion image. Little cutie has got that perfect attitude worth emulating. Thank you for dropping by. Best regards!

Joseph De Cross from New York on June 03, 2012:

You got my votes. Actually we are having fun writing and enjoying our lives. Great topic, and that Lion pic! Sorry kitty cat! You got caught again..! Lol!


Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on June 03, 2012:

Hi Michelle. What a heart you have. It's true, we never know what other people are going through, and understanding them is the only way to let them realize we care; saves us all from hatred. Thank you for reading and for the vote. Take care:=)

Michelle Dee from Charlotte, NC on June 03, 2012:

You never know what other people are going through. It's best not to hate, it takes too much energy. Great article, voted up.

Michelle Simtoco from Cebu, Philippines on June 02, 2012:

Tonipet, that is so sweet of you. I am trying to get back into writing as had been so busy before. Your words encourages me to keep on. And more power to you too! :)

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on June 02, 2012:

You are a blessing to hubpages, Michelle. I so loved your attitude and your hubs! Loved them all! The world needed young people like you to help bring back all things beautiful. My prayers for you and your goals, more especially for those who needed you and your bestfriend most. MORE POWER!

Michelle Simtoco from Cebu, Philippines on June 02, 2012:

Yes don't step into the "drama"...just let them be is a pretty good strategy to take as the first step! Blessings on this beautiful Sunday!

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on June 01, 2012:

Thank you Barbara. Most of what I've written came from personal experience and the many benefits led me to share how doing good can beat all things negative. Happy that you find the hub positive. Everyone have loved the cat's attitude. So uplifting. Thank you.

Barbara Anne Helberg from Napoleon, Henry County, Ohio, USA on June 01, 2012:

@Tonipet...You have shared in this Hub the universal truths and barriers that keep people from becoming everything they can be, if only for a little self mental primping.

Love the cat looking into the mirror, seeing what he thinks he sees!

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on June 01, 2012:

There you go RJ.

Her asking you about your joy is a gesture that she doesn't have it. Congrats then, you have become her source of light:=)... regardless of how she's going to treat you in the next days to come, one thing there is for sure - she will find a way to get the same joy and will never forget you for the rest of her life. Situations like this usually ends up to genuine friendship. I think you need to be stronger, these people are leaning on you. Easily said than done, but I think it's where you are called for :=) so God will always be with you.

Thank you for sharing RJ. You're giving us good lessons. I wish you more energy, smiles and hopes!

Hello Andera,

Lucky are those who are around you, they are sure of a woman who understands. No one would ever try to dislike you for such a gentle approach. You're awesome! So insightful I'm so happy you enjoyed reading. Thanks for stopping. Take care.

Andera on June 01, 2012:

Haven't we all been thinking about everything this article suggests at one point or another in our lives?

I bet we have, and I've personally found that 'trying to understand' actually benefits me more than it does anyone I'm hoping to come to terms with.

Also, awesome choice of images! They made the Hub for me!

RJ68 from Memphis on June 01, 2012:

It's funny really. It has become so let me say this. She had the nerve to ask me about my joy. It makes her mad and I cannot understand it so the more joy I have the more she tries to take it away and no one is doing anything to stop her. However, I have prayed and ask God to forgive her. I go to work knowing that God is at work in my life. NO matter what.

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on May 31, 2012:

Good thoughts wolves. Why moor over something unhealthy when we have the choice to leave it and move forward. As long as we don't hate them back then we're free to feel healthy. Very insightful comment. Best regards!

Apology4Wolves on May 31, 2012:

We are all screwed up. Friends are friends until they're not. Move forward and leave your pain with them.

Shri Mc on May 30, 2012:

I'm sure. Cheers

Tonette Fornillos (author) from The City of Generals on May 30, 2012:

Hello Shri,

Glad you liked the picture of the lion in the mirror. Mufasa could’ve realized nothing big can hurt the eye… good job for the kitten… lol. It’s probably the best thing we can do best for harmony. Thanks for sharing shri. Cheers and harmony!

Hello Larry,

So nice hearing from you always. I couldn’t imagine we did that, I can relate. I was like you, and it was only in my 30’s when a guy friend told me I should not wait for someone to make the first move for me to smile back. Wow, I was so shy he had to tell me that. I had the same situation in my early 20’s. My! I had no reason not to smile for the rest of my life! So lucky I got this chance to share about smiling! Thank you for the thoughtful comment. I really appreciate.

Hi Christin,

It’s the human in us to feel dislike. I like your attitude… there really is no apparent reason to be rude. After all, only “us” knows the reason why we dislike a few people. “Shyness can come across as unfriendliness”... been there done that and I really wish I can be a better person in smiles :=) I’m so honored you’ve thought of pinning. THANK YOU.

Gypsy hello!

“Reaching out and trying to turn the situation around might just make a big difference” … you’ve said it all, little things can really mean a lot! Mr. Magoo can very well relate to Tom being so unfriendly and teasing Jerry was so much fun without him realizing at the end they go as friend, haha. Thank you for sharing fun and for passing this on. Cheers!

Hello RJ,

How are you? I believe in saving “ourselves” some piece of mind. I think you did the right thing, you may have so much to go through but it’s better silent in prayers than a full-scale revolt. In doing them good, they sure will find light in you. Don’t worry, if they make you feel down, we’re here to make you smile :=). I hope things will be settled for you and your friends. God heals!

Hi Mhatter99,

The saying is right, “A small word can be a big bad thing.” Sweet Martin has got that heart enough for a bad word to go near not. Thank you for reading, if yesterday I did not know, now I know – it’s a legacy from martin sweet! Best regards to you!

Thank you very much guys, your comments are really wonderful and you all mean a lot to me! BEST of all!

Martin Kloess from San Francisco on May 30, 2012:

want to get unpopular fast? say something bad about 'that sweet martin".

Shri Mc on May 30, 2012:

Sometimes people are more upset with themselves then they are with you but they look at our smile or cheerfulness and become irritated.

RJ68 from Memphis on May 30, 2012:

Great hub. Going through this now of someone who has a problem with me that I work with and never have done nothing to create any tension. I just look at them as whatever and try very hard not to let them take down my spirit.

Shri Mc on May 30, 2012:

Too funny Gypsy, I remember him. Got everyone else in confusion but he escapes it. Gets like that sometime. lol

Gypsy Rose Lee from Daytona Beach, Florida on May 30, 2012:

Voted up and interesting. You are so right. It's like we add fuel to the fire if we start hating too. Reaching out and trying to turn the situation around might just make a big difference and we may just discover that it's not hate but perhaps something entirely different. Reminds me of the cartoon Mr. Magoo he wasn't unfriendly just couldn't see past the end of his nose. lol Great hub. Passing this on.

Ann-Christin from UK on May 30, 2012:

Good hub. It's ok to dislike someone for whatever reason but that is no reason to be rude and ignore people. I love the pics I'll be pinning them :)

Larry I know what you mean shyness can come across as unfriendliness I've been guilty of that.

Larry Wall on May 30, 2012:

I know what you are talking about. I was one of those persons who did not wave or smile back. I was extremely shy in my younger years and always afraid of saying the wrong thing. Also, I have trouble remembering faces. So it made me appear to be unfriendly, which I was just shy.

Shri Mc on May 30, 2012:

Beautiful Shepard-put the cat down Mufasa. lol

Shri Mc on May 30, 2012:

"help build harmony to every situation", I try.

WOW-the Lion in Mirror

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