Jake is a recovering addict and ex-con who has life experience that has taught him about addiction issues.
Im not here to try and decipher whats normal and what's not. But, when I wake up next to my girlfriend and we are both covered in sweat, freezing, and feeling very ill. The last thing we want to do is smile at each other and say good morning.
I guess its almost like some people with their coffee. You know that guy at work who you stay away from until he gets his 3rd cup of Joe in. Well, we stay away from each other until we can get our first fix in for the day. Thats even if we had some saved or left over before we went to sleep.
Im very bad at that. Im usually the one in charge of the goods too. I can never save any because its impossible for me to sleep unless we have an abundance of shit.
The Day Begins.
After we rolled out sluggish bodies out of the bed. I normally would go out in out living room area and start to set up our first shot. She usually wouldn't follow me out until I was done preparing it. I needed a few things to do this:
- Small container
- The drugs (heroin)
I would prepare this thing. This next part always varies. The injection. Now, if we had fresh new sharp needles we can usually get in and put pretty quick. However, if our points were a little old we could literally spend hours trying to get into a vein.
We would do this in silence and then after we got right we could finally start to speak to each other. Our addiction is the most important thing yo us. The insane part about this is that we are aware how wrong what we are doing is. We've lost everything for this and still cannot get enough.
Will We Ever Quit?
The funny thing about using drugs is when there is an abundance you live them. Its when you are broke with none that you develop your hatred for them. It gets to a point where your entire life is built around getting and using drugs. That is where im at right now. Its 3 a.m. and im sitting in a bando (abandoned house) where my ex girlfriend has moved into. She is passed out on a mattress from the exhaustion of being up for days. Im not worn out yet. I usually sleep during the day light hours anyway.
I do want to stop. The stress and sadness that comes with this life is incomparable to anything. I have never lived a different way though. Its always been drugs and prison as long as I can remember. So, is there another way of life for me?
The endless cycle....
Whats your opinion?
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2022 Jake Allen