It is indeed no exaggeration to say that man is a social being. One of the most important social relationships that have a tremendous impact and value in everyone'e life is friendship. As opposed to parents and relatives whom we are related to by being born into a family, friends are people whom we choose and allow to be a part of our lives. Hence the bonding that we enjoy with friends is extremely special and they have a great significance in our lives. While the most common reason that makes friendship bloom between two people are their similarity of thoughts and attitude to life, there are some distinct traits that should be present in a person for him to be a close friend. Following are such 10 qualities which you should be looking for in a friend.
One of the most important qualities that a friend should possess is being trustworthy.Friends are our biggest confidantes hence it is extremely important that we can have complete trust on them and discuss things with them without the fear of them revealing our secrets and personal thoughts to others.while one can figure out if a friend is trustworthy or not over time, it is possible to gauge this quality in a person in the initial stages of a friendship too.The best way is to try to ask him about other friends.If we find that he maintains diplomacy and does not reveal any secrets about that person then chances are very high that the person is trustworthy.One the other hand if he discloses everything that his friend might have shared with him to you it would in most cases mean that he would do the same thing with you and hence you cannot trust him completely.
The next important trait that you should look for in a friend is the fact if he is forgiving in nature or not.The last thing that you want in a friendship is ego clashes over petty bickering and your friendship getting effected by it.While friendly tiffs and fights are a common phenomenon it is important that your friend is forgiving and can move on and maintain the friendship beyond all fights rather than harboring ill thoughts in the mind and strain the friendship for ever.It is very easy to find out if this quality is present in a friend.If he values your relationship then he will never hold on to the past or keep any negative feelings in his mind. He would easily forget any tension between the both of you and forgive you and continue maintaining the relationship regardless of any issues.
Friends to watch with friends!
Loyalty is one of the most important traits that you should look for in your friend.Friendship is a very special relationship that is built on the basic foundation of trust and loyalty. Being a loyal friend means keeping the secrets of your friends safe, respecting the friendship and always being available to friends in need.A friend is someone with whom you can share your deepest emotions without any inhibitions.You can understand if your friend is loyal by simply seeing if your friend is always there with you in your difficult or challenging situations.
Another important trait that you should look for in a friend is being straightforward and honest.One of the best traits of a good friend is his ability to give direct , honest and straightforward opinions and this goes on to make the relationship refreshing and filled with positive emotions and vitality.Being straightforward keeps feelings of resentment or chances of any misunderstanding at bay and brings in trust and freedom in to the relationship.You can easily understand if your friend is straightforward if he gives you unbiased and sometimes even blunt opinions rather than trying to be politically correct all the time and superfluously agreeing to all your decisions regardless how stupid they may be.Lack of honesty and straightforwardness in a friendship makes the relationship very superficial and very soon the genuine love and bonding with the person ceases to exist.Hence straightforwardness is undoubtedly one of the integral aspects of a strong friendship.
One of the most important qualities that you should look for in a friend is their genuine enthusiasm about life in general.Enthusiasm is literally a contagious emotion and being with an enthusiastic friend always make life positive and we feel much more optimistic and proactive.Being with a friend who is always low in spirit and extremely serious about even trivial matters makes the equation with the person less appealing and slowly distance creeps in between the two. More over everyone has some issues with life or the other . Being with friends is a moment when one would want to have a good time which would help him in uplifting his spirits. Having an enthusiastic friend always helps in coping with our stress and we get an emotional strength that helps in combating any situation.
Games to play with friends!
One of the most important aspects of being a good friend is being dependable.It is very important that you should be able to count on a friend in times of distress and have complete belief and conviction that he will be with you .Friends who are only with you during good times and fail to be with you when you need them are surely not dependable and they are just good as accomplice but not fit for deep and genuine friendship.
Being respectful and showing mutual support is one of the basic requirements for a stable friendship. It is important to have a friend who is respectful towards your preferences and practices even though they might not be in alignment to his personal choices . You should be in a position to comfortably voice your opinions to your friend without having any inhibitions.Similarly sometimes your friend might come up with some views which you might not completely agree with . But if you show respect and tolerance then the same feelings will be reciprocated to you.Having a friend who always criticizes you whenever your thoughts do not match up will slowly erode feelings of mutual respect and the friendship is bound to end sooner or later.
Having a friend who is selfless is one of the basic traits of a good friend.A friend is someone who comes to your aid without any reason or expectation to get something in return.But never expect too much without reciprocating similar feelings as then you will be nothing but an opportunist.opportunist. Moreover it is also important to understand that selflessness does not mean a sacrificing attitude.So be realistic in your expectation and ask for things which you think even you can do for him.
9. Supportive and Non judgmental
One of the most common things that we expect out of a friend is support. The last thing that we want out of a friend is giving a judgmental view on things and always questioning our preferences without supporting our decisions.Friends are those who are the closest in our lives sometimes closer than even parents and all that we look for in our friends is their emotional support.You can easily gauge who is a supportive friend by their attitude. Friends who are associated to each other over a long term are generally close because of the fact that they understand each other well and always support and back their decisions.
Friends can have an extremely positive impact one our lives right from boosting moral and confidence to helping in taking appropriate decisions.A friend should be someone who can inspire you so that you can broaden your horizons and get a realistic and different perspective on things which can enable you to take even the most difficult decisions of life with extreme ease.In many cases it is seen that we cannot relate to our elders owing to the inherent differences in our way of thinking . But our mind is much more ready and open to take advice from our friends as we do not find their advice patronizing. Hence having a friend who can inspire you is a great way to have a long lasting and fulfilling relationship.
The Most Important Quality Of A Friend
Hence these are the 10 qualities that you must look for in a friend. But it is extremely important to note that just expecting these qualities in your friend is not enough. Friendship is a mutual give and take relationship and hence to have a long term and fulfilling friendship all the above mentioned 10 qualities must also be present in you so that your friend can also have a positive experience with the relationship just like you expect out of the association.
How To Make Friends That Last A Lifetime
It seem like the older we get the less real friends we have. But the core of this problem is not that it's just part of life, but rather our socially distorted understanding of how to actually make friends.
Children don't suffer from this distortion. They know exactly how to make friends. And you as a child knew it definitely better then you know it now. Isn't that true?
If you want to find out how to make friends that last a lifetime then Click Here!
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Do you have any other ideas for qualities that you think a real friend should have?
Nathasha Sadilmi from Sri Lanka on May 09, 2020:
This is a great article
Stella Lockhartt on November 24, 2019:
Bogdan Ivanov (author) from Berlin, Germany on March 06, 2016:
Wow! That's great to hear. Thanks.
Greg Alan Bartley jr from Altoona pa on November 19, 2015:
I really like ur article if help me making a real friend
Monica Langley from USA on January 09, 2015:
All points in the article are really very important to find a best friend but I don't know why i always search for someone who is funny and is laughing machine :P
Well thanks for interesting article :)
Devika Primić from Dubrovnik, Croatia on December 04, 2014:
All of these qualities are so meaningful and a well-approached hub on such a friendship.
Sai Chaitanya from INDIA on November 15, 2014:
I will look for trustworthy and forgiving, when choosing a friend. Because, A person who cannot forgive others, will never be a good friend. And, a person, who was not trustworthy, can't be a best friend. And even, the remaining qualities, explained by you are wonderful. But, those people who have got all the qualities are hard to find. But, Still our friends are friends.
Kenneth Avery from Hamilton, Alabama on October 19, 2014:
I meant every word. You are always welcome.
Just keep up the fine work and you will touch a lot of lives.
peachy from Home Sweet Home on October 19, 2014:
i think it is not easy to find a friend who is forgiving and respectful. Some just blare whatever they got
Kenneth Avery from Hamilton, Alabama on June 10, 2014:
Thank you for your kind remarks about my offerings, but what I said to you was the truth. I love to read your works--for they are amazing.
Just keep up the great work and I believe that big things will come to you.
Thank you also, very much, for your following.
It means a lot to me.
Bogdan Ivanov (author) from Berlin, Germany on June 10, 2014:
So many compliments that I didn't expect. Well, thank you for your kind words I really appreciate them.
I've read a couple of your articles and I must say that they are incredibly well thought through and a joy to read. And by the way, you have one more follower.
Wish you the best and
Kenneth Avery from Hamilton, Alabama on June 09, 2014:
This is an excellent piece of writing. Amazing, to be honest.
I loved every word. Voted up and all the choices because you deserve it.
You might write an in-depth look at what happens when two best friends, a male and female, fall in love.
You have such a gift for writing. Just keep writing and good things are bound to happen to you.
I cordially invite you to read one or two of my hubs, and be one of my followers.
That would make my day.
I am so honored to meet you.
Kenneth Avery, Hamilton, Alabama
Bogdan Ivanov (author) from Berlin, Germany on April 20, 2014:
Vasiliu Cristian on March 30, 2014: