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This Is Why You Should Never Stay Friends With Your Ex

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Decide to spend time with your ex and you might regret it for a lifetime. Most states do not enforce friendship agreements, so if one person decides they want out of this arrangement, nothing is stopping them from suddenly ending communication or initiating conflict, which will lead nowhere good.

Remember all the reasons you said "I do" in the first place and use that to remind yourself why you shouldn’t stay friends with your ex.

Did they push too hard for prenup negotiations? Were they bad listeners during their therapy sessions? Did their parents make an inappropriate comment at Thanksgiving dinner when things were still new and raw? If any of these scenarios ring true, then it may be time to end things with your ex-spouse.

It can be tough to let go but remember all the good times you had together and focus on moving forward instead of looking back.

This Is Why You Should Never Stay Friends With Your Ex

1. What are the reasons you should never stay friends with your ex?

There are a few reasons why you should never stay friends with your ex. First, it can be confusing for both of you to maintain a friendship when there are still feelings of love or attraction. Additionally, it's often difficult to transition from being romantic partners to platonic friends, and the line between the two can easily become blurred. Finally, staying friends with your ex can make it more difficult to move on from the relationship and start fresh with someone new.

2. How does staying friends with your ex hurt you?

There are many reasons why staying friends with your ex can hurt you. For one, it can be difficult to move on from a relationship if you're still hanging out with your ex all the time. Additionally, it's easy for things to get complicated if you continue to be friends with your ex. You may find yourself getting back together or constantly fighting, neither of which is good for your emotional wellbeing. Finally, staying friends with your ex can make it difficult to date other people, as you may still have feelings for your ex and be reluctant to let them go. Ultimately, it's usually best to move on completely from an ex-relationship and cut all ties rather than try to stay friends.

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3. Can staying friends with an ex ever work out successfully?

There is no one-size-fits-all answer to the question of whether or not it is possible to stay friends with an ex successfully. Some couples may be able to remain platonic after a break-up, while others may find that maintaining a friendship is too difficult or painful. Factors that can influence whether or not staying friends with an ex is successful include the couple's history together, the reason for the break-up, and how amicably they parted ways.

If both parties are committed to remaining friendly and can set clear boundaries, then there is no reason why staying friends with an ex cannot work out. However, if either party feels like they are getting too attached or starts to re-experience strong feelings of love or hate, then it may be time to reconsider the friendship. Ultimately, it is up to each couple to decide if remaining friends is right for them.

4. Is it better to cut all ties or try to be civil?

There is no one-size-fits-all answer to this question, as the best course of action will vary depending on the situation. However, there are a few things to consider when making this decision.

For your children's sake, it is generally advisable to try to maintain a civil relationship with your ex. This can be difficult, but they must see both parents getting along and working cooperatively towards a common goal. If you cannot manage to be civil with your ex, it may be better to cut all ties completely so that there is no opportunity for them to see or hear negative things about their other parent.

If you do not have children together, the decision of whether or not to stay in contact with your ex may be less complicated. However, it is still important to think about why you want to stay in contact (or not). If you are hoping for a reconciliation, trying to be civil may be the best option. If you simply want them as a friend or source of support, staying in touch may not be necessary. Conversely, if there was bad blood between you during your relationship and you don't think being friends would be healthy for either of you, consider cutting it all off.


Staying friends with your ex is completely foolish, and I hope anyone who has the urge to do so reconsiders their mental state. I'm not the first person to say this – there is a multitude of articles out there telling you that being friends with your ex is a terrible idea (and I will give you some links at the end). Your relationship did not end well, but that does not justify staying in contact with that person. You never know what will happen; some people do remarry, but the majority do not."What if" scenarios aside, it's no fun to be on the receiving end of constant reminders about how much happier your ex is without you. A "stay away" period of at least a few months is the only healthy way to carry on.

In the end, there are no two perfectly compatible people, but often we're tempted to stay together out of convenience or because of our "tried and true" mantra from The Wreckers. We have to remember that sometimes a breakup is for the best. A clean break allows us to find someone whose values better align with ours, whether in our personal or professional lives. And if you ever find yourself stuck in a friendship with an ex, it's OK to cut them out of your life to move on. You deserve happiness too, and you shouldn't settle for anything less.

So, bottom line: if you're not willing to fully commit to the person, then you should never stay friends. Don't give them any room to twist your kindness and care into some kind of romantic interest. Don't let them keep calling you on the phone because they can't stand to be alone. Whatever your reason is for staying friends with an ex, it'll only lead to trouble—unless you're both ready to leave the past behind and move forward together. And let's be real, are you ever really ready for that?

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2022 Shadrach Chigozie Peter

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