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Safety and the Single Lady Volume 6

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Ms. Macon is an advice columnist and content writer for radio and television commercials. Catch her on Ask A Bitchface, truly funny truth.

Ladies, Under No Circumstances Should You Try Fighting Dudes For Fun...

But, as a woman who has been a victim of assault, and years later, almost a victim, I can tell you the difference in the two situations:

I fought back. And I fought hard.

I also listened to the voice of dread that was in my stomach. And I started to mentally prepare. I took in the location, possible exits, possible assistance, etc. I scouted the sight the same way he had done.

I also knew I had one of two options. I could fight, or I could let it happen.

There was no way in hell I was letting this man get my clothes off of me. So on to part two of the story.

I'm Very Fortunate, I Have 2 Brothers

And they can be genuine jerks. We have wrestled my entire life. Which taught me a lot, like no matter if I'm feeling bulletproof, my 6'7 baby brother can still spin me like a helicopter around his head.

I'm 5'2. There's not a chance in hell I'm defeating him in hand to hand combat. Even Rhonda Rousey would have a problem there, and would need to come out striking because it's only going to take one blow from a man that size, and it's more than just your cage that's rattled. That's the type of hit that will scramble your whole egg.

As women, you need to learn that womens' defensive moves ARE offensive strikes. That's because once he has you in his grasp, you're through. Let your closest male relative wrap his arms around your body. Now do everything you can to get loose.

I'll wait.


Now imagine that wasn't your closest male relative. That is a man that wants to hurt you. Exactly.

I had 2 choices; I could let it happen, or I could fight.

What Do You Absolutely Need To Know?


Don't let him take you off of yours, and do anything you can to make him lose his. Forget standing there exchanging blows with any man. Ladies, I don't care how many times in a week you go to the gym. My cousin trained Buster Douglas, and my daddy had a regulation size ring in his garage.

I still understand that even gloved up and with a mouthpiece, I would be a fool to go headfirst in with someone a foot taller and with a hundred pounds on me.

However, I can use some defensive strikes to try to blind him, severely wound him, or cause him to lose his balance, where I can shove him off of me.

You can hammer strike a man if you have your keys in your hand. It's just like it sounds, as you would swing a hammer to hit a nail, with one of your keys between your fingers. Remember, keep it tight, because a wildly flinging arm is not an asset, it's something they're going to stop and use to hold you. It's called a strike for a reason. Quck, to the point, one tightly controlled move.

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What Are Your Other Options?

I'm going to reiterate some of the points I've made in other Safety and the Single Lady columns. Never, and I repeat, never let them take you to a second location. They're not doing it to talk to you, that's for sure. You do anything you need to do to stay at the first location, because the reason they don't want to stay there is fear that they'll be interupted by someone.

If they get you to another place, it will be a place where nobody will see, and more than likely, nobody will find your body.

You scream, elbow him in his face, hammer strike, kick his ankles, anything in your power to keep him from putting you into a vehicle and taking you to the place that, ultimately, is probably going to end up being where they recover your remains.

I know we all like to believe we could land a well timed groin kick without a problem, but I can tell you after many failed attempts over the years with my brothers, it is nowhere near as simple as we like to think. You don't train with your feet, ladies. Your feet are really just the means to move your vessel. But your hands, they're the answer to everything in your day. Everything. And they'll do exactly as you ask them to do, dexterity included.

Practice your hammer strike, with your key out. Practice controlled, tight moves with your arms. Putting an elbow out defensively, and using that same elbow offensively, as in putting it right into his lips.

Do all three of these while keeping your balance. They don't cost you any money, you don't need any equipment, and you don't need a sparring partner.

Practice these moves until they're burned into your brain. You truly never know when you may need to save yourself.

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2020 MsMacon


dashingscorpio from Chicago on October 15, 2020:

Great advice!

I would also say if a woman is involved with a man no matter how upset she may get with him she should never initiate violence.

In the old days you'd hear about a guy saying something offensive to a woman and she would slap him and walk away.

This is 2020, if anyone hits someone they should expect to get hit back. No one in their right mind would slap a bear in the mouth.

You should only throw the first blow when you know violence is bound to occur. You might want to take stock of things in the room which you can grab to use as weapon. Vital spots to deliver hard blows are eyes, groin, kneecaps, and the throat.

If you're being held face to face try a headbutt to the nose or cup your hands and slam them hard over his ears with the intention of bursting his eardrums. Spit in his eyes or use your fingers.

Lastly if you're uncomfortable carrying a gun you may want to invest in buying some pepper spray to use on in their eyes/nasal areas. Remember your goal is to {escape} not to win.

Once you're free notify the authorities.

One man's opinion!

Anya Ali from Rabwah, Pakistan on October 09, 2020:


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