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In the Flesh ~ a Poem and Commentary About Finding Love Online

John is a contemporary poet who uses the rhyming styles of the classics to discuss current issues.

Love in the Virtual World

Since the introduction of the Internet the world has seen a major shift in the way people communicate, and even find love. More and more friendships and relationships are developing online rather than "in the flesh."

Some of these people eventually meet and transfer their cyber relationship into real life romances, but the vast majority never meet and are destined to only find and share love in the "virtual world."

This poem attempts to describe one such relationship.

Instant Messaging and Chat Rooms

Instant Messaging (IM) and Chat Rooms operate via the Internet. This allows for instant communication between two computers anywhere in the world and because of this IM and Chat Rooms have flourished.


Instant Messaging is a service that allows users to send typed messages, pictures, files, and live video with sound to a recipient using their screen name. It provides a personal way of communicating with friends and other known acquaintances and is very popular among teenagers and adults alike.

In order to use these services users must download a free program and install it on their computer. There are several available with two of the more popular ones being Yahoo Messenger and AIM (America Online IM). The program handles all the communication and provides a window for the user to type and receive messages.

In the Flesh

Your written name

Breaks through my crust,

Those feelings rise,

Of love and lust.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

I hang on every word

You write,

Whatever time of day

Or night.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

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You make me laugh,

You make me cry.

More often though

You make me sigh.

How do you hold

Such hidden power,

That makes strong men

Wilt like a flower?

You say such words

That don't seem real.

I can't explain

Just how I feel.

You're sensual

But funny too.

I crave my cyber time

With you.

I've never even

Seen your face,

Or heard your voice,

Or know your race.

The love we share

Is young and fresh,

I need to meet you

In the flesh.

Beware Internet Dating

Beware Internet Dating


A chat room is similar to Instant Messaging but instead of one-to-one communication, users log on to a themed based virtual room and communicate with several people only known by their screen names. By sending typed messages to the room all connected users can read and respond like a big online community. The range of topics to choose from is endless: relationships, hobbies, sports, politics, health issues, and religion etc. Basically if there is an interest, there is probably a chat room available. It is often of a place for users to post their name, engage in some chit chat, and then wait for someone to request an Instant Message which is also known as “going private.”


If you find yourself becoming attracted to or involved with someone through instant messenger or a chat room and the relationship appears to be getting serious, it is probably a good idea to request to communicate with them through Skype, FaceTime or other form of video chat.

This way you will have the opportunity to actually see the other (probably faceless) person you have been chatting with. Often people are not exactly honest when chatting online. They may lie about their age, show you a photo of themselves that is ten years old, or of someone they would like to look like but isn't in fact them. They could even be the opposite sex of what they pretend to be.

You still won't be able to confirm details such as if they are actually married or single etc. but you will at least have their appearance and voice to go on.

They met online

They met online

Warning signs

  • You meet someone online and after just a few contacts they profess strong feelings for you, and ask to chat with you privately. If you met on a dating site they will try and move you away from the site and communicate via chat or email.
  • Their profile on the internet dating website or their Facebook page is not consistent with what they tell you. For example, their profile picture looks different to their description of themselves, or they say they are university educated but their English is poor.
  • After gaining your trust – often waiting weeks, months or even years – they tell you an elaborate story and ask for money, gifts or your bank account/credit card details.
  • Their messages are often poorly written, vague and may even address you by the wrong name.
  • If you don’t send money straight away, their messages and calls become more desperate, persistent or direct. If you do send money, they continue to ask you to send more.
  • They don’t keep their promises and always have an excuse for why they can't travel to meet you and why they always need more money. (source: Scamwatch)

Don't Believe Everything You Read

"Is the above poem written from experience?" you may ask. Well not that I am admitting :) although, I have been approached online by a number of very friendly and exotic women who look like supermodels but are desperately lonely and can only find a kind caring man on the Internet.

They used to always be from Ghana or Nigeria, but more recently seem to be British or American (funny that their English writing skills are never very fluent..damn the school system today) who unexpectedly have to travel to the African continent to settle the affairs of a sick or dying father or relative. This usually recently deceased person remarkably always has millions of dollars tied up in their estate that their only daughter cannot access without it being claimed and transferred to a third party's bank account.

This is where they usually request my kind assistance, and for my help they will generously pay me around a tenth of the fortune. I only need to pay the solicitor's costs and that of transferring the money etc. usually a mere $400 or so. To arrange this all I have to do is email the President of some bank in West Africa etc whose email address they supply.

These women are very friendly and ask all kind of questions about where I live, what interests me, sport I follow etc. and I am so suave and adorable that they fall in love with me within the first five minutes of messaging, promising me anything and wanting to meet me so we can spend our lives and the million dollars together (maybe it's my Aussie accent,,nah that can't be it, they haven't heard it).

They seem to miraculously be experts in whatever sport or interest I say I like. For instance I told one that I loved football, so she came back telling me that Manchester United was her favourite team in the FA Cup and all these facts that held no interest for me. I told her I liked Rugby League or Rugby Union Football, not Soccer...and she was stunned into temporary silence.


Have you been scammed?

If you think you have been scammed, report it to the website, app, or social media site where the scammer first approached you. Let them know the scammer’s profile name and any other details that may help them to stop others being scammed.

If you think you have provided your account details to a scammer, contact your bank or financial institution immediately. (source: Scamwatch)

Too Good to Be True

About this time I slip in the fact that although this is all very tempting, I am happily married and not free or interested in meeting them, but wish them well in their quest for online love or whatever they are looking for. These girls invariably do have trouble digesting this information however and after asking a few questions about my wife and if I have children, revert immediately back to arranging to meet me, what we can do together etc and how wonderful a person I am. Yes, what a wonderful person I would be, willing to cheat on my wife for someone I have only spoken with for five or ten minutes by Instant Message.

By now I have had enough fun stringing this person (probably West African gentleman posing as a voluptuous model) along, that I click "block this user" and never have to hear from them again. At least I wasted some of their time when they could have been scamming someone more vulnerable and gullible.

I am sure many women have experienced similar messages or emails from handsome and suave foreign men spruiking similar lines. I'd be interested to hear your stories in comments.

I just want to make it clear that what I have written here is in no way meant to trivialise the legitimate search for love online, or belittle those looking for it. I know a number of people who have met their life partners online (my family members included) and could never be happier. I'd love to hear those stories too.

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2015 John Hansen


John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on March 11, 2016:

Thanks for reading this Geri, and glad you found it entertaining. I guess I can't help my online charisma :) (pity it isn't like that in real life). I know a number of couples who have met online and are very happy (including one of my sons). It can work, but care needs to be exercised. Have a great weekend.

Geri McClymont on March 11, 2016:

Jodah: A very entertaining article about online dating. I'm sorry to hear you've been stalked by so many women online. I know several people who met their current spouse online and both couples are very well-matched, in my opinion. However, I think it's best to enter the online dating scene with great caution and to try to meet in person as soon as possible. Dating locally makes this a lot easier. Thanks for a great read.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on March 08, 2016:

Exactly Ed, and how did we get there? Thanks.

ahorseback on March 08, 2016:

What a great subject for thought , where have we gone Jodah , where have we gone ?

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on November 08, 2015:

Thanks for reading and the great comment Cris. Glad you enjoyed. Yes I remember Catfish, a great poem, and there have been a few other hubs along this theme recently.

CrisSp from Sky Is The Limit Adventure on November 08, 2015:

Well, we've been warned about those scammers and sadly this is really happening in the cyber world we now live in. Remember, one of my older poems, "The Catfish"? So, beware!

Your image clips are really pun-ny and the poem is fun to read just perfect for a Sunday lazy day.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 25, 2015:

Yes Deb, my "Spam" email box is full of them...occasionally one sneaks through and I sometimes like to have a little fun with them and string them along for awhile until they ask for money...just to waste their time and spare someone else more gullible.

Deb Hirt from Stillwater, OK on October 25, 2015:

I heard that this happens a lot to older folks who these Africans think are lonely. It would be nice to play a game with them...maybe ask THEM for money!

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 21, 2015:

Thank you for sharing your experience Shauna. The best thing you can do with the spammers is delete the emails, but I like to waste their time. Glad you had some success through the dating site, even if it didn't last. Cheers.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 21, 2015:

Thank you for sharing your experience Shauna. The best thing you can do with the spammers is delete the emails, but I like to waste their time. Glad you had some success through the dating site, even if it didn't last. Cheers.

Shauna L Bowling from Central Florida on October 21, 2015:

John, I've gotten a few spammy emails promising me a fortune if I help with banking issues. I immediately delete them and never respond.

I did once find a guy through a dating site. We actually ended up having a wonderful relationship for a while. He lived nearby and we had quite a bit in common. We dated for about a year, then I decided he wasn't the guy for me. He had a major drinking problem and I just couldn't live with that.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 19, 2015:

Thanks for reading and the insightful comment Jennifer. I agree with everything you say about domestic abuse too. Stalking is a bigger problem than it ever was since the Internet and tracking aps on phones etc. Glad you enjoyed the poem. Cheers.

Jennifer Mugrage from Columbus, Ohio on October 19, 2015:

Fun poem. I like that you ended it with the title. Punchy.

So glad the subject of domestic abuse has come up. No, I have not been a victim, but through the experiences of friends and reading Why Does He DO That?, I know how hard it can be for victims to get their plight taken seriously. And that's in America, where the sexist attitudes described above are at least not institutionalized, as they are in many cultures.

Truly, the human heart is deceitful and desperately wicked. I think stalking/abuse has always been a problem, but the sexual revolution has removed many rules and family/community protections that used to help and guide vulnerable young women through the world of jerks. And the internet has made it even wider and more chaotic.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 18, 2015:

Thank you for that great comment Faith, and sharing your insights. I am pleased that I also met my wife before the Internet came into being...33 years ago. Have a great day. Blessings.

Faith Reaper from southern USA on October 18, 2015:

Hahaha, John, what a perfect poem all around for this hub here!

Whew, I am so relieved that you brought home all of the warnings as to placing oneself vulnerable to the Internet and those who lurk there with bad intentions, especially looking for all of those poor lonely souls just looking for love all the wrong places as the song goes. I have been contacted by such and knew to never even acknowledge them back! I have my Facebook private, as that is the place most sex traffickers find their victims, sadly. First, they find those young and lonely women and follow them for a year (those whose Facebook accounts are open to the world) and then after they get to know the woman without even having contacted them but just getting to know their friends and their likes and the places they frequent, then they contact them. They are usually really good looking men with great jobs and an attractive lifestyle, seemingly. They know just the right words to use for the especially lonely women with low self-esteem issues, who are obviously depressed in a major way. Then when the time is perfect they make that "date" for them to fly out to their lavish homes just to get to know each other, then when they do, they are instantly sold into the sex trafficking world and never heard from again.

I am so thankful I met my husband of 37 years the old-fashioned way when there was no Internet LOL. What a blessing. Having stated all of that though, I do know of a few who have met their soulmate online.

Bless you for bring awareness to this most rampant issue of this day.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 18, 2015:

Hi Paula. It's good that you can relate to this and it is interesting that we have been approached by the same scammer. I agree they are so blatantly obvious that it is hard to believe anyone would fall for their spiel, however as they say "love is blind." I think it is usually a good idea to rely on "fate."

Suzie from Carson City on October 18, 2015:

LOL! Jodah, this was fun to read! I certainly have been contacted by a scammer or two. In fact, I believe it may have been the very same who wrote to you!...LOL. I must say that I've yet to talk to anyone to has actually fallen for such scams. Let's hope not! These are so blatantly phony and ridiculous. I am tempted to return a message, suggesting they get a new and better routine!!

I too know some couples who successfully began their relationship online. I've never been the least bit tempted to place myself "on the internet market!!" LOL.....I'm a firm believer in Fate.

2 thumbs up, Jodah.....Paula

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 18, 2015:

Hey Eric, thank you for sharing another great success story. A full security clearance and Government approval is a must. Thanks for reading and your generous comment too.

Eric Dierker from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A. on October 18, 2015:

Holy guacamole, I ain't got time to handle nurturing the flesh and blood I wake up every morning with a kiss. But truth be told I met my wife in 2000 over the internet. She was assigned superintendent of an office build out we were doing in South East Asia. But she came with a full security clearance and government approval and I did not fall in love for over a year and much physical contact. So I laugh at it but it can start something real.

Great poem and hub

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 16, 2015:

Yes Devika, unfortunately that is not an isolated story. If you go through my earlier comments I mention a case where a friend of mine was stalked and attacked after she "blocked" a guy she had been chatting with online. Online dating and chatting needs to be approached with caution.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 16, 2015:

Rozina, I appreciate your generous comment on this hub and my writing style. I do like to try and add a little subtle humour or sarcasm into many of my hubs and so it is good to hear it is successful. I felt this was an important issue to discuss. Have a great weekend.

Devika Primić from Dubrovnik, Croatia on October 16, 2015:

I have read the comments and the poem always interesting from you. I knew of a lonely young woman. She got chatting on her cell phone to some guy thinking his sweet conversations were true. When it was time to meet the guy she went secretly. It was unfortunate for her the raped and killed her in the secluded spot they had me. Her body was found the next day in a local park. Such dating don't work out as the many claim.

Rozina Iftikhar from Islamabad on October 16, 2015:

Nice poem...followed by great discussion, touching an important issue;

really like your style of writing....great humor without being too directed...I just loved reading it...

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 16, 2015:

Mike, thank you, thank you, thank you

mckbirdbks from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas on October 16, 2015:

Hello John, interesting choice of topics. Nice poem and I liked the humor.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

MsDora, thank you for reading and agreeing that this is an important issue. I will have to check that movie out "Tall Hot Blonde"...I imagine the title is how someone described themselves at an online dating site. Thanks for recommending it.

Dora Weithers from The Caribbean on October 15, 2015:

Jodah, great that you tackled this issue. The poem is right on. There is movie called "Tall Hot Blonde." Every one interested in online dating should watch it. Like you, I say "Cheers" to those who really find love.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Hi Al, thank you for sharing about your successful experience with online dating. It is good to hear the positive side of it as well. Some of my closest friends are people I have met online so I am all for it. My message is just to be cautious. You can actually get to find out a lot more about the other person by chatting online over an extended period, as long a they are genuine. Thank you for the kind comment about this article and the poem.

Al Wordlaw from Chicago on October 15, 2015:

Hey John, I've had my share of online dating. I've actually met some nice ladies online. I am still good friends with all 5 of them after over 16 years. I met with 3 of 4 that were far out of town and 1 in town. That 1 out town whom I've never met and I are still very good friends. Of the 5 there is 1 that I would marry. So, you've got to be cautious and very selective with online dating. The people whom I've met in person and dated are not likely to do online dating but both ways of meeting are interesting to me. This was a very good article. Real cool poem too.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Drbj, you nailed it with that description. Thanks for reading this hub and I am happy that you enjoyed the experience (poem and cartoons included).

drbj and sherry from south Florida on October 15, 2015:

Loved your poem, Jodah, and the photos and cartoons were the icing on the cake. Thank you for this treat. I guess one could sum up online dating as 'Caveat Emptor' - do not believe everything you read.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Thank you for your in-depth and insightful comment Max. Yes you are right that everything you need is available at our fingertips thanks to the Internet. Just type in what we are searching for and we will be presented with a multitude of choices. Then we just have to use our wisdom and discernment to decide what is legitimate and what is not. "Seek and you shall find" exactly. I appreciate your kind words Max. Blessings.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Good for you Larry, you are proof that online dating can work successfully. All the best to your wife as well.

Max Havlick from Villa Park, Illinois on October 15, 2015:

Good work, Jodah, using your accessible poetry to open up discussion of this important topic for your vast, world-wide audience of readers. In spite of the dangers, your message actually is hopeful, because (except for the incorrigibly naïve unable to learn) we usually, eventually do find what we earnestly look for. The universe calmly, compliantly, even diligently cooperates with all of us that way.

If you look with desire for books, you will find them.

If you look with desire for brooks, you will find them.

If you look with desire for cooks, you will find them.

If you look with desire for crooks, you will find them.

"Each one sees what he carries in his heart!" ("Ein jeder sieht, was er im Herzen tragt." Goethe, Faust, "Prelude in the Theater.")

"Continue asking, and it will be given to you; continue seeking, and you will find; continue knocking, and it will be opened to you." (Q-Luke 11:9 = Matthew 7:7; my trans. of Greek text; note the imperative verbs in durative present action, not in aorist single-point-of-action erroneously given in most English translations).

Only continuous learning enables us to improve our results.

Best wishes to you, Jodah, and to all your readers sharing this unending quest for a better life full of happiness and love. Max, Thursday, Oct. 15, 2015.

Larry Rankin from Oklahoma on October 15, 2015:

Actually met my wife online. It has been a most harmonious Union.

Great insight.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

That's great news that your friend from Amsterdam is thinking of visiting you. Oh and I don't mind if you keep giving me ideas for hubs either..wink. Take care back.

Missy Smith from Florida on October 15, 2015:

Thanks Jodah. I wasn't offended at all or belittled. It really is an important subject.

I don't think I will ever meet my friend, I'm pretty sure of that. However, remember my friend from Amsterdam? We've actually been friends for three years now, and he is thinking seriously about visiting me here in another year. He's been to America before, so he's up for the challenge. lol.

Take care and I'm really glad you've grabbed some ideas off me. :)

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Hey Missy, what can I say. I admit your poem did give me the idea for this. In fact a couple of your hubs have sparked something. I was in know way trying to "have a go" at you or belittle the importance of your online relationship however. As I say if you are careful and do it the right way (Skype etc) it can be an excellent way of getting to know someone. My eldest son met his wife on IM, then they started chatting on Skype. She is from another country but had some family in Australia. They talked online for two years before finally meeting and marrying and have now been together five years and have two children. Thanks for liking my poem and the pictures and I do with you all the best in your relationship. Never say never...anything can happen, and I hope you do one day meet in person. Blessings.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Beth thank you for stopping by. Yes, I feel so sorry for those poor damn things who can't wait to access their million dollar inheritance. The least I can do is hear them out before letting them down. I may be dumb but I'm not special! or should that be the other way around?

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Thanks for returning to say you liked the poem Dana, and for sharing. You are certainly right about the Internet having many pros and cons. Blessings.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Thanks Ruby, wow, I am jealous. I have never been approached through Hub Pages lol. I can't even imagine trying to date again live or online. Glad you enjoyed this hub.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Thanks for reading Carb Diva and for liking the poem. Yes there certainly are success stories. My son met his wife online and they have been married five years now. It is fraught with danger though so you need to tread the online dating scene with care. Blessings.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Ann, I haven't tried online dating either but I do keep in touch with friends I have had for years through Yahoo IM and family through FaveTime etc. Because I have instant messenger I have had scammers and the like approach me through that. As I say in the hub I sometimes treat it as a game and play them along for awhile just to see how far they will go and waste their time so they aren't really scamming someone susceptible. Glad you liked the poem.

Missy Smith from Florida on October 15, 2015:

Haha...Well, I can't help but think my last poem may have given you a bit of incentive to write this article and poem. And you are right about scam artists. I have definitely ran into those and leave them behind fast. They are pretty easy to pick out.

The international friends I have, do skype with me, they never ask for favors, and I made it clear from the start not to do so. If that's the kind of friend they need, they don't need my broke a** .

As you know, I have fallen for someone, but I see and know him, and he sees and knows me. We've been like this for about a year and two months now. I don't expect anything permanent will come out of it. I don't even suspect I will ever get to meet him in person. However, love is nice any way you find it and for how ever long it does last.

You do make so many good points in your article. I like your poem as well. As much as I love the one who I reference in my poem, if I do ever start a relationship again, I'm sure it will be with someone I can actually be around. My poem is correct though, I am his, even if not all of me, I think a part of me will always be in some way.

Again, your article is important. Lots do fall for bad people. I hope I never do that. I hope I'm not easily deceived. I like to think I'm pretty aware. I do think about it though, but I also think about how important it is to make friends from around the world too. You just really got to make friends online in a cautious way. Definitely Skype!!!

Your pictures were so funny!!! :)

Beth Perry from Tennesee on October 15, 2015:

Jodah, I really like the poem! I see you've had your share of experience with those poor darned things looking to settle million dollar estates, lol. Dear goddess. But I suppose they are all counting on that one special person dumb enough to fall for it.

Thanks for posting. Good advice you shared!

Dana Tate from LOS ANGELES on October 15, 2015:

Hi again. I forgot to add how much I loved the poem, and I also know of a few people who have gotten scammed out of money. It was hard for me to believe that someone would trust a stranger like that but con artist are called con- artist for a reason right? The internet has brought many blesses and curses. Important topic and I'm going to share it.

Ruby Jean Richert from Southern Illinois on October 15, 2015:

I loved the poem. I have been approached through Hub Pages. I would never consider meeting someone online. I am old fashioned. I want to see and hear a person before I commit to a friendship. I think a lot of people have been hurt this way. Great read...

Linda Lum from Washington State, USA on October 15, 2015:

Jodah - I LOVED the poem, and excellent advice for anyone who might consider beginning a relationship in this way. I know a couple who met online--they've been happily married for 5 years, but I think their storybook ending is pretty rare. Thanks for a great read. Have a blessed day.

manatita44 from london on October 15, 2015:

You say a lot of what takes place on line. You're a pro, Bro. He he. You've gone further than me. It's very risky! I like the old Bob Marley guy with his lap top. Cool looking dude.

Great poem!

Ann Carr from SW England on October 15, 2015:

Never tried it and wouldn't even think about it. Even face to face you can make awful mistakes (I have been there) so I think the danger is 10-fold when you're online.

Great pointers and great poetry here, John. A subject worthy of discussing and pointing out the huge drawbacks.


John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Hi Dana, yes more and more people are trying Internet dating as a means of finding Mr or Ms Right,and some do find love, but many more are scammed. Thanks for reading this.

Dana Tate from LOS ANGELES on October 15, 2015:

I have never tried dating online I like physical contact. I know people who have and it has worked for them but they eventually met the other person. With it being so hard to find love nowadays, I don't blame people for trying to find it wherever they can. However, they must be careful as you have stated there are lots of con artist out there.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Many people have and are trying Internet dating Bill, but you are right with the analogy to quicksand and you do need to tread carefully. Thanks for reading.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Thank you Flourish. I am glad you enjoyed the poem and yes hundreds fall for these scammers every year in my country alone. There are more victims than are reported too because many are too embarrassed to report it.

Bill Holland from Olympia, WA on October 15, 2015:

I tried it once before...internet dating....tread softly on that ground. It oftentimes is quicksand from which you can't return. :) Enjoyable read, John, and quite realistic.

FlourishAnyway from USA on October 15, 2015:

I enjoyed your poems (very good) as well as your account of how you were approached by scammers. They are definitely persistent and creative. I don't know why they always seem to be associated with Nigeria. It's sad that people actually do fall for this. My dumb proThen-in-law fell for a Russian woman scam. He was in the military and really lonely at the time. He always was very gullible.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 15, 2015:

Thanks for sharing that Suraj. Yes India does have a long way to go to get anywhere near equality of the sexes. But it will happen, no matter how slowly.

suraj punjabi from jakarta on October 14, 2015:

Jodah, that is quite a horrifying statistic. Yes Indian government are also toughening their laws when it comes to women abuse, especially since the horrifying Delhi rape case that happened few years back, it really changed the whole nation's outlook on how women should be treated with respect. Yes there are still many cases of abuse and rape, and it is far from over but the government now takes it more seriously.

Not to sound stereotypical or judgmental, but the mentality men generally have on women over there are very conservative and backwards. Somehow they have this idea that women need to be ruled and should mindlessly obey whatever men wants, anything otherwise they are deemed to be rebellious and uncivilized. It is a very sexist society. Thankfully it is gradually changing.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 14, 2015:

Yes he survived thank goodness, but still has scars on her face today from the attack. There is a concerted campaign in our country at the present time to try to stop domestic violence and violence by men against women. The Government has recently toughened law and given police extra power in regard to domestic disputes. We have introduced strong anti-terror laws but the statistics show more women are killed in Australia each week than people killed each year by terror related activities.

suraj punjabi from jakarta on October 14, 2015:

Jodah, wow now THAT is horror. mine was a soap opera at best. Did she survive? Men is the number one threat to women, all the misery that women have to suffer throughout the ages happen because of men.

So you can imagine how courageous a woman can be to trust a man enough to want to go out with him ALONE and most likely AT NIGHT. Forget online, just going out alone at night with someone you got to know in the flesh is courageous enough. Nature sure has wired us in crazy ways.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 14, 2015:

Wow Suraj, that was certainly a horror story from start to finish 15 years later. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and insights om Internet dating and chatting. I knew one woman who had been dating a guy online. After he was starting to act a bit creepy, she broke it off. But he had gotten to know her well enough to be able to track her. He stalked her and one night broke into her house and slashed her face with a razor. Scary stuff.

suraj punjabi from jakarta on October 14, 2015:

Nothing beats the old fashion way of dating. You need real friends who can introduce you to real people. I have chatted with many girls back in the day and I am glad it never really matured into anything serious.I met my wife during an Indian ceremony in the temple, we dated but we often chatted online. But it started by meeting in the flesh. I seriously do not encourage online dating. I never get too serious when it comes to my online life.

I do know someone who got serious with someone from the internet, the guy pretty much killed her softly with his words. They got married and it was not long before she and her family found out that the guy was poor and could not even afford to feed himself let alone my friend who happened to come from an affluent family. They found out he was poor before getting married and the parents even gave her warnings, but she was adamant. You know how love is, you are a poet.

You want to know the crazy twist to that story? they are in divorce proceedings now, and it was during the divorce process that the divorce lawyers and judge found out, WARNING: PLOT TWIST COMING UP: the marriage certificate was a fake to begin with! OH MY GOD! So 15 years of staying together fighting, physical and verbal abuses and having 2 kids and turns out they were not even officially married to begin with. I feel sorry for her, but I feel bad for finding this a little comical and sometimes I can't help but laugh at how maddeningly silly the whole thing is. 15 years!! This is like the story line of a black comedy.

John Hansen (author) from Australia (Gondwana Land) on October 14, 2015:

Hey Frank, you were quick. I only just pressed the "publish" button. Ye you knew what you were getting in the good old days. Glad you enjoyed this.

Frank Atanacio from Shelton on October 14, 2015:

I love the ending.. Just loved it!!! The love we share

Is young and fresh,

I need to meet you

In the flesh.

then that cartoon I'm a model.. give me the good ole days...

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