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How to Tolerate a Flirting Husband

Flirting partners

Are you having an issue with your flirtatious husband or wife?

What is the root of your spouse’s flirtatiousness?

You met your husband and his flirting drew you closer to him. So, there you are wondering if it is the same kind of flirting that would bring another woman close to him in the same way.

Flirting with someone when you know you are married and committed to a relationship, to me is inappropriate.

Is his flirting focused on one particular person or more than one person?

Flirting with different people does give you something to think about. Anyone with flirtatious behaviour needs to see this type of behaviour from their side and the spouse’s side. You can address the issue in your way.

Your flirting is making me feel less attractive to you.’’

‘’Are you not satisfied with me?’’

‘’Am I not good enough for you?’’

‘’It makes me feel disappointed when I see you flirting with your co-worker.’’

‘’You make me feel heart sore when you flirt with every woman you meet at work.’’

‘’It hurts me so much when you put another woman above me.’’

You have a right to ask as many questions as you like, especially when your partner chooses you over another woman. Flirting with other women and making these women a priority isn’t fair to any spouse.

It is about trusting the one you are married to, or dating.

You married for decades but your partner disregards your feelings and finds other women attractive, and flirts with them like you are not part of that marriage.

Though your spouse loves you they choose to flirt and pass on advanced signals to the other woman. So, you may or may not find this normal or part of what you think is in a marriage.

My point is, does this make you feel happy in your marriage?

Flirting with another woman in your presence of you must make you feel hurt.

How do you tolerate this type of behaviour?

It is hard to watch your partner flirt with another in your presence of you. A flirtatious personality is not for everyone to accept. You have boundaries and when the boundaries are stepped over, flirting becomes harmful.

Flirting with another instead of your partner is not acceptable!

This is often seen in individuals who come from different backgrounds.

For example:

Some were raised in a family with poor communication, no attention from family members and if the individual has a lack of confidence while growing up.

These factors play in the minds of such individuals. An issue that needs to be discussed with your partner.

Understanding where your partner comes from is one of the major problems partners have to deal with in their relationships.

Lack of attention in childhood grows to an extent that, as an adult, you are affected by this, and tend to seek attention elsewhere too. You not only seek attention from your partner, but also from others.

Personality types are not always understood in any relationship.

You do not understand such behaviours from your partner, and one day sees for yourself what you do not want to see. It is disrespectful to you, and regardless of your feelings your partner still chooses to flirt with the other women.

You can redirect the flirtatious behaviour toward your partner to get even with them, but it won’t make you feel any better. Instead, you will be down to your partner’s level.

Flirting ruins partners in a relationship or married partners.

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Be flirtatious yourself and see how your partner feels. Maybe it will make you feel better or worse. Flirting is rude, and without thought of how your partner will feel is not fair to anyone.

Unless you do what your partner is doing it could make your relationship work or break it off. However, flirting is not what you should go through with your partner. The feeling is not good to see your partner flirting with another and you standing there and silently taking all this in and feeling hurt about it.

I have had a lot of that and will not accept flirting in my marriage.

It made me unhappy, is inappropriate, and disrespectful, and I am not forced to go through this type of behaviour. I don’t believe that anyone should go through this in their lives, and with their partners. It is frustrating and makes you feel less worthy of him.

Why would he flirt with someone else if he is in love with his wife?

What is that urge that makes an individual want to behave this way?

Why should anyone go through the hurt and feeling out of place, and feeling like nothing when he and she are in the presence of you?

Self-control is needed to keep such behaviours together when with other people.

Flirting is not allowed unless you accept your partner flirting with others. Most couples have trusted one another. When flirting comes between you both you should rethink your relationship with your partner.

Sometimes the lonely and bored housewife wants the attention of another, and it so happens your partner is available for that. Such women are attention seekers and this works out well for one to flirt with. An individual seeks those who are in need of attention.

That sounds correct to flirt with an attention seeker.

Flirting takes two people to enjoy the fun and make these advances. If you do not take it seriously, flirting will get serious with the attention seekers. I know of married women who love the idea of other married men flirting with them.

It is sad in a way to witness these behaviours. They lack attention from their husbands and find it in another, sounds like that is how these women pass their time.

Bored, and hoping for a burst of laughter from another who gives this pleasure to them at the expense of their partner’s happiness.

Flirtatious eye contact and smiles to make some lonely person feel good in this way is not what any couple should experience at any time in their lives.

The bored housewife that seeks attention from a flirtatious married man is not thinking of the wife of that man, but about how good she feels when he flirts with her.

There is a limit that one can take and one should know when to stop doing that. If a married person doesn't know when to stop that behaviour it is time to make a decision.

Couples flirting


Flirting partners in a marriage

How to deal with Flirting Husbands

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2021 Devika Primić


Devika Primić (author) from Dubrovnik, Croatia on April 22, 2021:

Hello dashingscorpio, it has been a while and so glad you shared your thoughts here. Flirting takes two people married or single to take advantage of such situations. My observations tell me that it is disrespectful for a partner to flirt and do this in the presence of the other. ''suffering is optional.'' Flirtatious people are born that way something it can't be stopped and I feel for those who do not know and ignore such behaviors. Your comments are appreciated. Thank you very much for sharing your feedback here.

dashingscorpio from Chicago on April 22, 2021:

Very interesting topic.

Hopefully one discovers their mate is flirtatious BEFORE exchanging wedding vows. The purpose of dating and courtship is to determine over time if you are compatible and share the same values. We get to choose who we marry.

Some people flirt in order to get people do them favors or use them to get an advantage. The person who flirts with the baker may get the larger slice of cake or the person who flirts with the security guard may be allowed access into a nightclub as opposed to having to stand in line to wait their turn...etc.

Nevertheless flirting with someone (in front of their partner) is disrespectful.

However I suspect not many married people will run down to the courthouse to file for a divorce and break up their family because their spouse flirts.

At the very least they have to reach a point where they no longer trust him or her or suspect they are cheating. Once you let your spouse know how much you dislike something (if nothing changes) you have to decide if it's a "deal breaker" for you. No one is "stuck" with anyone. Suffering is optional.

Devika Primić (author) from Dubrovnik, Croatia on April 22, 2021:

Adrienne Farricelli Exactly ''bubbly women'' the same as I see it in some married women who exchange the flirting with married men. They do not care for the wives of these men and flirt back. To me I see these types are missing the attention from their husbands or are seeking something fun. Thank you for comments

Adrienne Farricelli on April 22, 2021:

Hi DDE, flirting with another can be very frustrating behavior, sometimes it can even be quite subtle, where if the wife/girlfriend gets irritated the husband remarks: "But I wasn't doing anything bad!" Yet, the wife is quiet or alone at a party, while hubby tries to grab the attention from bubbly women who are open to exchange the flirting.

Devika Primić (author) from Dubrovnik, Croatia on April 22, 2021:

Hi emge it is common but so disrespectful to their partner's feelings. Thank you for sharing your views here.

MG Singh emge from Singapore on April 21, 2021:

Devika, this is a nice article and it's something so common. Mainly as most men feel flirtation is good. Well written.

Devika Primić (author) from Dubrovnik, Croatia on April 21, 2021:

Peggy I too agree with FlourishAnyway. and with your comment. Thank you for sharing your views here.

Devika Primić (author) from Dubrovnik, Croatia on April 21, 2021:

FlourishAnyway You said it well, flirting with the same person and disregarding a partner's feelings is not fair. I totally agree that a man such as that would need walking papers and public shaming. It is sad for a partner to go through this experience. Thank you

Devika Primić (author) from Dubrovnik, Croatia on April 21, 2021:

BRENDA ARLEDGE I am pleased you stopped by here. Sharing what you know is interesting and true. I do not approve of any partner flirting and ''Gone are the days of a real marriage'' Well said. Thank you very much for your feedback.

Peggy Woods from Houston, Texas on April 20, 2021:

I agree 100% with how FlourishAnyway responded to your question. Boundaries do need to be set and respected by both partners in a marriage.

FlourishAnyway from USA on April 20, 2021:

Every couple has to have dealbreakers, boundaries, expectations. A little random flirting is one thing but outrageous flirting, a pattern of flirting with the same person, or embarrassing a partner in public with displays of flirting with someone else are some of the things that will get a man his walking papers and probably some public shaming.

Devika Primić (author) from Dubrovnik, Croatia on April 20, 2021:

Hi Bill Thank you for a generous comment. You have thought well about your comment and I enjoyed reading the additional information. Respect is none when a partner behaves in this way. Your valuable comment say it all here. I appreciate your time.,

Devika Primić (author) from Dubrovnik, Croatia on April 20, 2021:

Ann I am so glad you stopped by here. Your comments are useful and adds more to what my hub actually means to a reader. Thank you.

Devika Primić (author) from Dubrovnik, Croatia on April 20, 2021:

MsDora Thank you very much for stopping by. Your comments mean a lot.

Devika Primić (author) from Dubrovnik, Croatia on April 20, 2021:

Misbah Thank you kindly for comment. I believe what you believe and trust is everything in any relationship. Your make good points and I enjoyed reading a comment from you. It makes me think about having a husband who can take care of a woman and to respect her feelings.

Devika Primić (author) from Dubrovnik, Croatia on April 20, 2021:

Interesting article about flirting husbands. Why not wives? I thought about it and females do the same but my focus here is about men.. That is the other focus here about trust and being respectful to a partner. Thank you very much for a comment.

BRENDA ARLEDGE from Washington Court House on April 20, 2021:


Your article touches on a very rule action that happens alot.

Sometimes I think no one really cares about anyone but themselves.

Gone are the days of a real marriage.

But then I do know people who naturally flirt with like a waitress while dining out.

They believe it helps to bring the person a good day & it's just part of who they are as a person.

But tolerating someone flirting right in front of you is a big No.

This shouldn't happen.

Misbah Sheikh from — This Existence Is Only an Illusion on April 20, 2021:

Devika, this is an interesting article. I believe a husband should first care about his wife. They should stay loyal towards each other and most of all there should be respect, even if there is no love

I enjoyed reading your hub. Thanks a lot

Blessings and Love

Chitrangada Sharan from New Delhi, India on April 20, 2021:

Interesting article about flirting husbands. Why not wives? Sometimes, even wives tend to flirt.

As long as, the couple is faithful and honest to each other, respect each other’s sentiments, I don’t think there should be any problem in relationships. Love after all is based on mutual trust and understanding.

Thank you for sharing this interesting article.

Dora Weithers from The Caribbean on April 20, 2021:

Some people are naturally flirtatious. They don;t mean any harm, but it is disrespectful to ignore or embarrass the spouse under any circumstance, so flirts beware!

Ann Carr from SW England on April 20, 2021:

It's certainly something to talk about if it happens to you. I guess it depends on the level of flirting and how one discusses it. In past relationships, I've seen it and thought maybe I was being unreasonable to object, as 'it's just a bit of fun' sort of thing. No, it's not fun if you're hurt by it, so talk!

You make some good points here, Devika.


Bill Holland from Olympia, WA on April 20, 2021:

This is an interesting topic. I have known people who are naturally flirtatious but mean nothing by it. It's like it's part of their DNA, and they don't even know they are doing anything. Some of them are excellent husbands and wives. I have also known people who flirt in what I consider to be a dangerous way, always walking a tightrope between playful and having an affair. Your article touches on much of this. Bottom line, for me at least, is to be very careful what is said when with someone you are not married to, and respect the love of your partner.

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