How to Make your Childs Mother Love You Again
If you are having problems with the mother of your child or baby Here is some very good advice listen up. 1st i would just do my very best to take care of the child as your the father. 2nd I will allow he to see me doing things for the child. Keeping your words short with her. Never let her see you still love her. Always play it cool. And most of all always be sweet and nice. If she's smart she will start to notice your different. Remember when you argue and fight the child will notice that and will grow up to be confused on what really going on between you and the mother. And if the mother continues to fight with you over the smallest things. You will push her away farther and farther. The best thing to do is don't call her for weeks. Visit with your child on the dates you have visits with him or her. Be short over the phone. Make it seem you're always busy. By avoiding her you are giving her the time to think about you. With women you never know , She can be thinking about the past you guys once had. And if that baby grows up looking like you. Chances are she is going to fall in love with you again. But most important make sure you provide for her and the baby. Do not leave her doing it all alone. Remember a woman loves a man who can take care of his child. If you follow these steps you might have a chance of getting her back. Good Luck
David on August 11, 2017:
I was with my First Baby Mama for 4 years and then we separated when my son was 1 month old. After another 4 years it's been good and bad but we have a overall good co-parenting relationship.
My second baby mama on the other hand I will never, ever, and I mean EVER be reconciling with her. She being a Scorpio, and physically, verbally, mentally and emotionally abusive as well as denying my affections which I found out she was cheating on me with her other ex's as well as ex fiancées.
Meanwhile while 2nd Baby Mama treating me badly, 1st Baby Mama was there not sexually but mentally and emotionally and I told her that now I realize what I did because of what 2nd Baby Mama did to me and I so sincerely apologized to her. After that I said I feel that I got my friend back after 8 years and she said that I did.
Recently 1st Baby Mama and I have been lightly flirting. Maybe next year when things are done with court with 2nd Baby Mama and Bankruptcy, I ask the 1st Baby Mama out on a date.
Marco.A.N.R. on November 11, 2016:
I can't say I still have feelings for her because I can't remember the last time I kissed her and how it felt. But I still have flashbacks and I get the feeling that there's something missing. It may be true love, or it just might be my emotions playing games with my head. Maybe a lot of you fathers can relate to me and hopefully my comment helps others understand that a lot of us deal with the same question, WHAT IF. The mother of my child gets nervous around me and I can feel her different. I can't explain it but she still loves me, I know it. I personally have a lot of pride but sometimes I tell her like it is. Maybe one day we will be together, maybe one day I will finally move on. We both know how we feel and nobody else will ever understand that, we just happen to love in silence, one way or the other. To all the real fathers out there, if your gut tells you she still loves you, remember, it isn't always your mind playing tricks. True love will never end, so keep your head up high fathers, we were chosen for a reason, take great pride in that. WOMEN LOVE THAT, SPECIALLY THE MOTHER OF YOUR CHILD!
LL319HA on October 18, 2016:
My ex partner left me two months ago we have a 2 year old and found out 2days after she left me she was pregnant with my second child. I have tried everything to show her how much I love her but she don't seem interested. What would people recommend I do I really love this women but I carnt seem to do anythin
Luke on May 23, 2016:
Hi all, I'm nearly two months into a break up from my partner of nearly 9 years. We have two girls together and split up for a few months back in 2013 after getting stuck into a new parent rut and lost touch with each other with being new parents etc. Recently I took on extra work of a evening to support our family as our rent and bills went up plus having our second child now with us who was born in 2014. She broke up with me early April saying we wasn't that great but with working two jobs to pay the bills to give my girls every thing they needed. She used this as one of the reasons to finish it. I am devistated as with in the past year I have lost my mum and dad. It's a fought one to swallow as my little family was my life after the loss of my parents. Kills me driving away from our home and my beautiful girls. Just hope she comes round and sees that we can be a happy family once again.
Lee on May 20, 2016:
That's a very good attitude to have Jay, my partner split with me in November 2015 but is moving out this weekend and we have a 4 and 5 year old. It is breaking my heart as its the final act so to speak but I have good family and friends and will get through it fingers crossed
Jay Moon on May 02, 2016:
It's a tough pill to swallow, especially when kids are involved. There's so many reasons to contemplate getting back together an making it work, and often times so few reasons the relationship ended. At the end of the day, you have to accept people's decisions not matter how much you don't want to. It's her choice, and yours to accept it or hold on to something that's no longer there.
Sure you'll think about what could have, or might have been, but we can't exist in memories. Cherish the good you had, and be supportive. But if you really loved her, you'll want her to be happy even if it's not with you.
I often times think about my ideal family that didn't make it. It's natural. Don't think you're weird. Just because we're men, doesn't mean we're heartless. A big part of being a man though, which makes it difficult to deal with emotions you may be having, is when to accept that you're powerless in a situation and being okay with that.
She's gone. She may never come back. You'll only see your child grow up part of the time. This is your reality today. It hurts. But you'll be okay. No article will change that, because this article has no power over her emotions. But you have power over yours.
I opted to take my time. I've dated many women. No emotional connections yet but I'm okay with that. If you really put your all in a relationship, it takes a long time for your emotions to catch up with your penis. And I don't want to start something I'm not ready to finish, so I'll reserve my emotions until I'm good and ready. It'll be disaster to repeat this mistake again so picking a good partner is crucial. Plus, it's only fair to you, your kid and your future lady to be honest with your emotions, especially if you're still hanging on to your ex.
I'd like to tell my kids mom, "hey, although you hurt me, and left me, let's try again." But again, at the end of the day, do I want to risk being vulnerable to someone that walked away from me and perhaps gave me the biggest loss in my life? Not really. You have to accept that you broke up for reason. If that reason is still an issue, you'll break up again and next time it'll be worse.
I'm single, dating, but single. And I would honestly considered getting back with my kid's mom, but it was her choice to leave, and I understand it's her choice to come back. Although, I highly doubt that would ever happen or within the time period before I completely move on emotionally. I had several past girlfriends call me years later trying to get back with me, because I know I'm a good man (when in a relationship) and they realized it too late.
Meanwhile, I'll focus on me, deal with missing my son when he's gone, and enjoying the life I have left and enrich it.
I suggest all you gentes do the same. If you're the one that screwed it up, then losing your pride and owning it may be your only recourse.
Tell her you're sorry, how you feel about her, what you'll do different, and just tell her you're not looking for a response or answer, you just want her to know how you feel. Then leave it alone.
If there's any love left in her, she might come back. Or at least contemplate it. Remember, you're not looking for an answer, you just want her to think about you, like you are of her. So plant that seed, and watch it grow. If she doesn't want anything to do with you romantically, you'll have to accept that, put some RESPEK on that, and move on.
Best of luck fellas.
Logan Rogue on April 30, 2016:
Hey there. Baby mama here. Have any of guys thought about getting married to the mother of your children and not just shocking up as boyfriend/girlfriend? My child's father should like all of you. Tell me he loves me, I'm important, I'm his life. He goes out of the way to wait on me hand and foot. Still do all this stuff for me even though I have a fiance now. But he don't want to marry me so I moved on and found myself a man who loves me, respect me and has stepped up to be there for my kids. I'm engaged now to a man who did the exact same thing as my baby daddy, except he wants me to be his wife. And want he wants to make the love for me real on paper. My only advice to you guys is to be yourself and look deep down inside of yourself and evaluate your issues.
Maybe she is not in love with you anymore because you don't want to commit. Maybe she want you step up and put the effort into your relationship. My child's father is too late. He is till there for our child, he is a great father. But I can't bare to love him and have an sorry substitute for a family. Now, our son gets to see someone really love their mom. We will be getting married October of this year.
Mikewillred on February 14, 2016:
I have tried this already but always tend to fall back on it. And also it is easier said than done you know. what is the best way to stick to it?
Autumn dad on January 07, 2016:
I left her long ago yes i thought i could do it all on my own. But the truth is no one can. I have 2 girls one thats my blood and the other is mine as birth cert. But not blood. Yes the children mom cheated she still going from guy to guy. Already married since and broke up. She moved 3000 miles away and had not tryed to see the children for 3 years. Lets be real she still in love with me so much that she cant be here or dose she just not care about then. Eather or im not waitting for something to spark would never be the same. But its not about me its about the children. So is there a time that I should give her children back because i know they can build a relationship. I grew up without a mom and told my self I would not raise my children as I grew up. CONFUSSED whats the right thing to do. Scared she would run with them like she did before so thats how I was granted full custody...
Lee on December 21, 2015:
Its not good mike, she has said that she isn't in love with me anymore as I have made her feel bad about herself and that this is a new chapter in her life and she only wants me to be there for the kids. Its strange as we are talking better than we have in ages but she is adamant that there is no going back for us. I have been going home from work and being more happy and chatty and just hope that she sees things differently in the future but I wont hold by breath
mike on December 04, 2015:
Lee. You are still in a VERY good situation. Waych and read the book/movie fireproof follow it and after your 40 days DON'T STOP! I missed my chance but I still feel she loves me just really wants me to be a different person and we have been split up for 8 months now
Lee on November 16, 2015:
I have two young kids with my ex, she told me Friday she wants to separate after 10 years together, I am gutted, she has been saying for two years that I need to show her more affection and I have stupidly let it just drift on as it was. We are staying in the house together until after xmas for the kids sake as only 3 and 4. Could anyone give me advice how to act whilst we are in the house together, should I be cool and not keep asking her to reconsider and just be nice with her and the kids etc?
Phouphet on October 03, 2015:
I've been there and I've had her come around and this does work. Of course I got my hopes up and jumped the gun and she had said several things. She's married and came back shortly and ran back to him. I honestly have come to the point where I'm strong enough to be without her. She has a lot on her plate and to give everyone the answer they have been looking for. Focus on yourself and your children. We tend to focus on trying to make ourselves happy by assuming we need our significant other and we do but, in order for anything to happen you have priorities first and things will fall in place. There will always be opportunities and right now your opportunity is to focus on bettering yourself so your children can be proud. Even though I blew my chance I got more out of it than last time and I am very happy and continue to focus on my happiness and spending time with my kids.
Erin M. on September 24, 2015:
This is horrible advice...the more you ignore a baby mama, the more she'll get the vibe you don't care & look elsewhere for someone that does!
(Source: a dating baby mama :)
Justin on August 19, 2015:
I think the best think to do is give her space and provide for the children and when she's ready she'll come to you she wnt be able to help but come back to you if you guys really had love because im going through this nowa nd i been through it before. space and time away from each other healed everything because she knows no one on this earth loves her like i love her and is willing to do ANYTHING for her like i am. just give her space (just disappear unless its something for your kids) b a good father and b patient and everything will get better...
tristan on August 17, 2015:
Heart break is never an easy thing to deal with, countless failed relationships, the pain is always the same. The ones that hurt the most? Losing those who you have children with! I managed to not only ruin having a family once but twice! The first time her name was lynsey, she loved me with all her heart. We had a son and I managed to destroy any chance of a family by drinking, taking drugs and sleeping with anyone who was interested. When I realised the mistakes I made it was far too late. Years later she got married and had another child with why used to he my best friend. Karma! Second attempt went alot worse, especially as I am still in love madly and deeply. Her name is Shae. We feel in love so quickly and I was wonderful! Son no. 2 comes along... Relationship was not easy. She was insecure and violent, cheated on me, and yet I always forgave her. Eventually it came down to a choice. Stay with Shae and my family would disown me, my first son would not be allowed to visit/see me or break it off. I chose to break it off. Biggest mistake of my life! I still have my boys in my life, I still have a family that's cares. But, I don't have what I've always wanted and that is a family of my own. Shae has moved on, lynsey has moved on...just don't see the point in trying anymore.
Stuart on July 20, 2015:
Hi I'm going through such a bad time also, we split almost 3 months ago and I've ruined everything with trying to force her to spend time with me and our son and pushing her to do things she doesn't want. She knows I'm a great dad and sees me with him and it stil didn't work. In the end she started hating me and has now slept with another guy and starting to see someone else. I try not to think about it and stay strong but in the end I just want my family back together. We started talking again as friends a couple days ago and I've asked her to dinner and a few drinks and she's agreed, all I can say is try be friends after you have have her space to forget about the actual break up. Ask her out for dinner or coffee or something, do your best to be friendly and not push her. Do not talk about the past or if she's seeing anyone else (that's none of your business) just show her what she's missing by not having you around. It's all I can do and if it works then great, if not then I've got to deal with it and move on. Treat her like you would anyother first date girl. Women are so hard to read and will never accept you begging for her back so stay confident, show no weakness and do not show feelings for her...in the end, you wouldn't have feelings for any other first date would you? We've kind of already spoke about a 2nd day together (as friends) but with these days I'm hoping she realises she wants me in her life. At that point back off and give her time to miss the good you rather than the one she remembers breaking up with.
mike on July 18, 2015:
am trying t get my baby mama back, I live her for someone else 2month ago, when she need me the most with my new born child.....now I regret and she doesn't want me back.....but I've always there for them....its been 3 week now since I've been trying to get back but nothing positive from her......advices?????????????????
Christopher1290 on May 03, 2015:
Me and my sons mother has been broken up for about a year now we have both dated other people but she wants me to move on what do I do if I still want my family please someone help me she means the world to me I've been so neglect ice in her emotional needs when it came to the end of our relationship I want to rekindle our love flame and keep it burning for longer than one night again please help
kaapse laiti on March 17, 2015:
Good day evry 1,me and my gf is nw almost 5yars 2gether my daughter is turning 3yars old she one's had an ex bf also now they try 2work out thngs again its killing me evrythng i say dous not work example, love u,u the world 2me etc al that small thngs i get so angry sumtimes and my heart feel down at the same moment they phne each ather evry nighttime,im still living with her its not ouer house her momy's ,she treats me sooo bad its not even funy she make me jealous also she wands 2arque about evry smal thngs if i tel her I love u,she wil somer reply No u dnt etc how do i prove my love 4her? Plz need ceruiose help my email is email@example.com ohja im 25yers old
dave on February 24, 2015:
Me and myex girlfriend have 2 hildren together and wr just broke up 2 weeks ago and all I keep thinking about is her and my children what is the best advice that spmeone can give me to make things work
Ramiro G. on November 25, 2014:
Me and my baby mam broke up 4 moths ago, an someone else took my place, it was my fault for the break up, and realized how important she is in my life after i lost her:( iv try being relationship with other woman but its not the same at all, still miss her allot, don't think it will ever go away, the 1st month she was acting mean with me, didn't want to talk to me, treated me like crap, and now she is acting really cool, nice, just like how she use to act when we were together, we talk almost everyday, and talk about our past and laugh, joke around :) the only problem is that i don't know if she just wants to be friends with me or is she trying to work our relationship??? i don't want to bring my hopes up and then she just wants to be friends, so i'm just going with the flow, being nice, cool, and being there for our son, see how it goes.
Sean on November 16, 2014:
If ignoring her doesn't work, then is it time to be as romantic as possible?
Memo on November 07, 2014:
Yea nothing works I will try this but I'm doubtful . She even asked me to get with other woman. Wants me to sleep over and hook up on weekends.
Sounds great if I was a normal guy.
But no u want a family sometimes I just can't handle the pain I flew 3000 miles 2 times just to pick up down because there's none in my town.
I guess you just can t show them you care and don t ask them let's make it work that does not work.
qUAN on October 30, 2014:
I am trying to get my son's mother back in my life but im so afraid. She is not only the mother of my child but one of the most beautiful women i have ever laid eyes on. I had to start taking antidepressant medicine to keep me away from panic attacks because every time someone mentions her name i start to get very weak, lightheaded and dizzy smh. But i really love her and i'm so scared to tell her i just want my family... PLEASE PRAY FOR ME
loc on July 16, 2014:
100 only one step i aint did yet
Mike on July 01, 2014:
I had my baby mother tell me she's no longer in love with me and to move on. Its hard to be nice when your told that. Ive told her stay and try to work on this family and she still moved on.
robert on June 30, 2014:
I'm 16 year old an I have a daughter that's 15 days old me and the mom broke up long before the baby (ileanna) was born an I still love her an have no clue how to get her back any advice?
Robert on June 30, 2014:
I'm 16 year old an I have a daughter that's 15 days old me and the mom broke up long before the baby (ileanna) was born an I still love her an have no clue how to get her back any advice?
Go on June 28, 2014:
I tried... It seems effortless... I gave her space and she runs back to me... Only to be a friend... Its to painfull to be a friend... She wants to converse everyday like were together... Argue like we're in a relationship... Then she gets mad at me when i say lets try to make it work... The best advice i can give is... If you're puttng all your effort into trying to make it work, but you're the only one... Let go and live a healthy life... Still be a father to your kiids tho... It kills me because i have my son and she has my daughter and i never intended to split up my children... I would do anything and i've made that clear... Sometimes love that was damaged a little is to much for some to take a chance on...
john on May 24, 2014:
I truly love her. I gave her space, someone else took my place, I always tell her how I'm there for them no matter what. It doesn't matter if I'm nice to her , it's like my words don't make any effect on her.
Pierre on May 03, 2014:
It truly works! But you have to be sincere. A woman loves you know matter what as long as your can read her. That's a task within its sself. It's a combination of things. She sees you in the child or children and you show you care. Don't be afraid to loose her or fail is a big thing cause you already have. But love your children. A good woman loves family.
Jay on March 30, 2014:
How u getting on? Is this worth a try?
john.m on November 20, 2013:
Ha was doing this trick before i seen this page it don't wrk cause if it did i wouldn't be here
snook on November 14, 2013:
Baby mamma drama sucks wish she woul open her eyes and see that i love her...snook