How to Get on Transsexual Hormone Replacement Therapy Relatively Easy
This article is designed for the transsexual who is looking to get on hormone replacement therapy relatively quickly and easily. I discuss a number of systems that may be available to use in your community. More often than not, if you live in a giant metropolitan area, you will be able to get onto hormone therapy using the first method relatively easily.
The reason why one would want to get on hormone replacement therapy quickly is to alleviate much of the stress of being in the wrongly sexed body. I use this terminology because the term "a woman trapped in a man's body" seems foolish to me. We all start out as prototypical female in the womb and we develop due to the pattern that the predominant hormone therapy provides for us. Therefore, a transsexual girl who starts her hormone therapy before puberty will look almost indistinguishable from any other girl. The body can feminized to a point with hormones and/or surgery so I would not even call my body a "man's body" even though I am a male-to-female transsexual.
I know this information because I myself have been on hormone replacement therapy and have had sex reassignment surgery without any need for a therapist at all. I am speaking from personal experience and have no intention of retracting anything I say since it is 100% true and correct to the best of my knowledge. I do hope this helps!
A Very Serious Warning Before You Begin
Please, please, please understand that this advice is intended only for the seriously gender dysphoric and those who understand that they are transsexual. If you have any doubt at all about your transsexuality do not seek out hormone replacement therapy and contact a therapist to discuss your situation. Many universities offer therapy to the general population on a sliding scale. There is a high cost for those who transition but are not transsexuals and Lynn Conway explains this better than I can.
Also understand that it is highly recommended that you consult a doctor at all stages of your transition to ensure that you are doing the right thing, being monitored for any abnormalities that hormone replacement therapy may cause and that you are physically fit and able to have any therapy that you seek.
In summary: Remember that in the end, you are the only one responsible for your own health and you are the one to suffer the consequences if you do not listen to good advice. In other words, don't blame me if you fuck up!
Your Main Enemy: The Harry Benjamin Standards of Care
The enemy that will keep you from getting any treatment easily is commonly referred to as the Harry Benjamin Standards of Care. It is drafted by the World Professional Association for Transgender Health (WPATH), formerly known as the Harry Benjamin International Gender Dysphoria Association (HBIGDA). They require unnecessarily high levels of therapist intervention before they will allow you to access any care and quite a few doctors in this country require the Standards of Care before they will do anything for you.
Do not lose hope though as there are a few doctors and clinics that can provide you with hormone replacement therapy without any therapist requirements or with little therapist requirements. I will go over some of the more common non-SOC systems out there to give you an idea of what options you have.
Option 1: The Tom Waddell Standards
The Tom Waddell Standards govern hormone therapy and give a general overview of transgender health concerns. This was initially designed by Dr. Tom Waddell who worked in the free/low-income clinics of San Francisco and this was developed with all transsexual people in mind. Today, there are a few clinics other than homeless clinics that provide services to transsexual people under the Tom Waddell system.
I started my hormone replacement therapy at a clinic using the Tom Waddell system without even being aware of it. I started my HRT in November 2007 at Dr. Hunter Hammill's office in Houston, Texas with no therapist requirement imposed on me. It was however a requirement that I attend a few support group meetings in the Houston area which I have before my appointment.
Option 2: Clinics and Providers That Don't Give a Damn
There are clinics out there that either do not require therapist intervention at all or require therapist intervention that does not fall in line with the standards of care. Basically, if you cannot find a clinic or provider in your area that follows the Tom Waddell standards, this is your next best option. Finding these clinics are difficult since they do not advertise what their requirements are.
One thing I would recommend is that you talk with people in the local transgender community to find a doctor that does not care about therapist requirements or has low therapist requirements. These doctors are not uncommon but can be tricky to find. If, however, no one knows of provider or clinic which would accommodate this requirement it is highly suggested that you starting phoning clinics and providers in your local area to find one that will provide services to you at no or low therapist requirement.
Generally, OB/GYNs and alternative medicine doctors have a higher level of acceptance—especially if they are curious enough to want to learn from the experience. It is highly suggested that you bring them a copy of the Tom Waddell standards so they will have something other than the Harry Benjamin Standards to reference. Ask the clinics and providers with low therapist requirements what they will require and what a letter would need to state in order to get care.
When I say low therapist requirements, what I mean is less than three appointments needed to get services. This can be done with a simple sanity check, which a friend has had in order to get her hormone replacement therapy.
I continued my hormone therapy while living in Seymour, Indiana with an Alternative Medicine specialist at the Schneck Medical Centre. I knew about this from talking with another transsexual woman who was helping me with my name change and a number of other transition issues. He did not care about therapist letters or anything like that and he provided me with a three-month script for my hormones.
Option 3: Fake Letters
Remember that this should only be used a last resort in the event that Options 1 & 2 did not work for you. I would remind you that most doctors go through tedious amounts of education and training and may not be easily fooled. But then again, if there can be religious doctors - that is proof that there are gullible doctors. If people in your general area are stupid it can work if you make your own letter.
The Aftermath and an Epilogue
Given the number of views this article has received since I published it, I feel it prudent to make a few designations here, just for clarity's sake. You should never, and I do mean never, self-medicate. That's very dangerous, as our bodies are reliant on hormones in order to function. You can suffer a number of problems if you take these drugs without a physician's supervision.
Furthermore, the SOC expresses a paternalism in the psychological and psychiatric industry, that they need to protect us from ourselves. It's a paternalism that I don't particularly care for and I believe that transsexual people should not have to go through these hoops because they have no basis in science.
I look forward to the day when we can serve rural communities by telemedicine, which is already being tried out by Planned Parenthood. This technology can serve transsexual people in rural communities.
But finally, I would like to say how flattered I am by the trust many of the people who have contacted me through this article asking for advice. I'm sorry that I could not help you, as I am not aware of many physicians who are brave enough to provide these services in many American metropolitan areas. I do hope, one day, to start making cold calls to certain health professionals (endocrinologists and Family Medicine doctors) to get more information about what physicians provide these services without a therapist's letter. But until I get the time to do that, I simply don't know. But thank you very much for trusting me with your stories and requests all the same.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and does not substitute for diagnosis, prognosis, treatment, prescription, and/or dietary advice from a licensed health professional. Drugs, supplements, and natural remedies may have dangerous side effects. If pregnant or nursing, consult with a qualified provider on an individual basis. Seek immediate help if you are experiencing a medical emergency.
Comments
jayne parris on September 05, 2019:
ive been dressing all my life so I changed my name to jayne and im dressed all the time now I just need to go all the way ?
Darren C. on August 26, 2019:
I'm a ftm individual who's in desperate need of finding a place where I can possibly get a referral for HRT. I live in Cincinnati, Ohio, so if anybody can tell me the places I can go to, it would be much appreciated.
Thomas K. on January 07, 2019:
I'd like to thank you. I've been doing my research, because I'm still young and in a home where I'd sooner be killed than put on T, but when I finally move out next year I plan on looking into transitioning. I've always had a hard time with therapy because it makes me uncomfortable as I'm not a very 'open' person, so I'd been hoping there was some way I could begin T without having to go through it, and I'm glad that I have options.
Dee Jamison on December 23, 2018:
Im 38 and ive been trying to transition since i was 9 yrs old im looking to start to get my hormones started i have straight Medicare my phone number is 626-455-8864
Jasmin on December 18, 2018:
I want necomw a fulltime lady npt jist a cd
Juno Karklin. on August 11, 2018:
I laughed seeing all of the bad grammar here. I wanted to give you a proper thank you for writing this article. It's given me lots to think about. I am willing and able to even do somewhat risky things to accomplish the task of gaining a female body. I am wholeheartedly thankful that I found this. May your future lead you to great places in life. -Juno Karklin 17
Calvin O'Neal on July 26, 2018:
I am a crossdresser. I enjoy wearing female cloths full time, but I need to have more of a feminime body. To obtane this, I feel out of place not being able to have the look that I need.
Clayton on July 03, 2018:
I'm tired of doing things for others now I want to do things for my sealf.and wanting to be a feamaile is the one thing I've wanted most in life.
Larissa on June 15, 2018:
I want to let the inner girl out.
Lawrence Pugh on May 31, 2018:
O am a very unhappy man! I have no interest in women and i am attracted to mem.
Gillian on May 31, 2018:
53 desperatly wanting to live mtf .Not just xdress when i know family arnt dropping in .Once i start i know they will accpt me.Im so un happy,have been from 13 when i knew.As i dressed and took my mate in every way.I cant talk to my dr ,i may buy on line:(
William Beck Aka Jennifer on May 23, 2018:
Hi My Practically Whole Life I've known I'm a Woman I've always felt Uncomfortable as The Male Gender and Body I was given I'm 29 now and I'm lookin to transition Finally now that I have a Gf that Accepts me for me I'm skinny and I'm Transsexual and A Adult Baby Diaper Lover who fits Baby Training Pants I'm Nomatter what going to Start Hrt Therapy and I'm getting Drs set up an I'm gonna go with your one option and I'm may start with New Dr watching Monitoring me gonna Self Medicate with Drs Advice etc
Victoria on April 21, 2018:
Hi my name is Victoria I'm m2f I'll b 50 in October I'm not on treatment at the mo because of my mental health I have eupd and hear voices wen I'm around ppl for to long tho i hear voices everyday but they are worse wen around ppl, I'm worried that i will never be able to go on hrt because of my eupd and it scares me to death
Traci Luvzcum on April 13, 2018:
I am a m2f transsexual who is desperate to find someone who is prepared and willing to provide me with a supply of oestrogen tablets. I am so desperate that I have given my body to a local pimp who is able to arrange meetings for me to give my body to gentlemen who will use me as a female whore on a regular footing and enable me to buy hormones from business friends of my. pimp.
Butch on March 11, 2018:
I have been on female hot.for 25 years and I looking for a DR.to turn me into a woman all the way 24/7
Martin on February 13, 2018:
i need help too, im ftm and i want to get on t quuuiicckkk, how do i do it
Fred Lalonde on February 04, 2018:
Hi I'm trying to get mtf hormones and don't know how? Is there anyone who can help me. I want to become a full time woman. I don't know the process. I need to know step by step instructions such as where to start, therapy, clothing, makeup, surgery, etc. If anyone can help please let me know
kallen on November 15, 2017:
hello everyone, im a 34 year old male and ive wanted to get mtf hormone treatments all my life i even had a gf who supported me and was the only bright spot in my life. ive been thinking very hard about getting treatments, but where im 34 now im a bit stand offish of it. but i feel so STRONGLY that i just cant take it anymore that i have to do this. i sometimes feel im about explode its so much. im hoping to take this information and get started. the middle of this year i almost decided to self medicate, but i knew better, and everywhere i looked people said dont. so thank you everyone for stopping me.
Jennifer on November 04, 2017:
I'm looking get hrt but I don't know how and where can anyone help me?
Thnx
cassandra on October 23, 2017:
hi i have been trying to get on fht for two years ,just resently I have seen my gp who sent me to a psychiatrist who said to me she would refer me to a endocrinologist then a week later told me I had to see another psychiatrist .this initial change of her mind really hurt me emotionally and I am still struggleing .I am not young but I have been struggling with my sexuality for ages and realise who I am [a woman] but I cant move on .is there any place in western Australia where I can procure female hormones so I can move on with my life .
Breanna on September 24, 2017:
And I've been taking hormone on and off roughly four years I am steadily on Esther Doyle and Sparrow locked on and everything's going great I can't wait for the surgeries thank you don't give up no matter what anybody tells you you can't do it if it's what you want go for it just go for it they'll help you
Sasha Lewis on July 09, 2017:
hello there,
so I have a question. I live in Mauritius (small island south east of South Africa) where there are no clinics that specialise or offer treatment for transgenders. Is there an option where I could get a prescription from a generalist and order the hormones online?
:( please help me, I'm a little desperate and I do not know where to turn to to get help.
Kandi White on July 05, 2017:
I need, want hrt so much! iv bn trannsgendered
Jo on June 25, 2017:
Hi. I am new to the mtf i have never felt right in my male skin I looked up srs and been studying I have related to so many stories of transgender over the past three years I have come to terms that this is who I am I came out to family about a month ago it went great I have a very supportive family I am seeing a therapist I am excited for the feuture any one know drs. In se Idaho that prescribe hrt thanks
walkerbooy on May 11, 2017:
hello i wanna ask from where can i get hormone male to female drogstore? what is name the medicale ? plz answer me? :)
Edward Carlson on April 21, 2017:
All this reminds me of my experiences trying to buy a house. What I kept hearing was that I didn't make enough money . Theses requirements are there to protect both patient are provider from harm and or legal action but it also feels like a conspiracy to discourage people seeking transition. A more open-minded public reaction would greatly reduce the likelihood of attempted suicide amongst the transgender community. I understand that this the reason for psychological counseling and evaluation. These things make the cost impossible for some to deal with. Insurance companies and their terms for care and what they will pay for are another major obstacle. I needed but could not get eyeglasses for years because employee insurances would not cover eyecare unless the eyes were injured on the job.
Tiffany Williams on April 11, 2017:
Hi I was just asking how can I start my hormones and we're to get them
jose on April 10, 2017:
this was good to read I'm 34 years old now I'm been off hormones for 7 years now and been liven life as a man and I hate it I just don't feel like one wen I was in 3rd grade I didn't feel or ack like a boy and started to act on wat I was feeling and it was a women I loved it and start cross dressing by 13 I felt competed even though u was able to tell at that time I look a little like both I didn't being what I felt I was that's alll that matter to me I didn't care then I started bying them from other ts girl till I was 18..then went to go get them from doctors was on them and became a real looking women went on to ha e a real life it was amazing but now my life is so diff I want my life I don't look like a women no more but i'dk how and wer to go it's been so long
paulsriley4@verizon.net on March 25, 2017:
I was interested and curious about change from male to female so I guess you look up specialist alternate medicine in the web
Perdia James Keller on March 20, 2017:
I am a female even though I have been off the hormones for awhile my mind an body craves to feel better thank you for your advice
janil on March 07, 2017:
I would like to do my own self medicting and wondering how can I get hormones. My doctor however has agreed to assist me in this with labs and all other testing to ensure my safety and that this doesn"t affect my overall health.. Can someone please help me with this.. I live in GA
Calvin O'Neal on February 22, 2017:
I have been trying to find hormones but do not know how to get any. Coukd you tell me how
WorriedMom1945 on January 25, 2017:
I'm not homophobic, genderphobic, transphobic or anything like that. What I am is a very concerned mom. My eldest child is transgender, on HRT and although I, myself don't personally understand, I accept and I love unconditionally. I can't imagine what it must feel like to be born one gender, but have no connection to that gender other than what you were physically born with. It has to be terribly hard, lonely (if your family and friends don't support you), depressing.
My worry comes with my third child that suddenly decided they were trans. This child has been through a lot of emotional trauma. Seriously injured in an accident when pre-teen, loss of father at 13. Bullied in school because they were "weird", but not due to questioning of gender, just an odd duck. Very involved in choir throughout jr high and high school. When my child graduated, choir went away and they found they had nothing to do and not many friends.
Prior to graduating they were hospitalized twice, self mutilation and suicidal thoughts, very hard senior year. My child has been hospitalized about 10 times total now. Been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, borderline personality disorder, schizophrenia... has had hallucinations as well as fantasies or day dreams of murdering the entire family. Even with all of this, it's my child and I love my children unconditionally. About 8 months ago, one of their friends came out as trans. My child really likes this friend and told them so, the friend said they were not interested in them, the gender. Six months ago my kid decides they're trans. Started changing clothing, the way they look and started obsessing about being trans and starting HRT. saw a gender therapist twice, first time gender never came up, second time referred to endocrinologist who said they saw no approval in system for HRT from counseling. Went back to counseling and they said because they were hospitalized due to suicide attempt two months prior then being 5150'd a few weeks before AND because medication is not taken regularly, they're not sending approval for at least a year.
We've moved, new insurance and saw psychiatrist once and referred to endocrinologist, no questions asked. I'm very concerned. This child has been accepted into the trans community online, FB, Twitter, tumblr and many transgender forums. I feel like my child just wants to be accepted... be a part of a group, it was Mormons for a while. My child just turned 20 and I honestly don't believe that they are trans. I believe that my kid wants to belong to a group and honestly the trans community is very accepting and encouraging.
My kid has serious mental problems that are not under control. They have only recently talked about or decided that they were trans. Trans YouTube videos are all they watch and all they talk about, like all day, every single day. I'm really trying to be supportive, but I don't think this is a decision to be made so quickly. I've found out that my child has lied to previous therapists and mental hospital therapists and social workers about many things, but to say they've felt this way for years, dressed this way for years, it's a lie. If my child cannot be honest with the therapists, how in the world are they being honest to themselves about who they really are?
As I said at the beginning, I do have another, older child that is transgender and I support them. It just scares the hell out of me how easy it's seeming to be for my kid with mental issues, to get on HRT. I'm really very worried.
Worried Mom
Eske on December 24, 2016:
Does anyone know any hormone doctors in the Austin (TX) area who don't require confirmation by a gender therapist?
Daniah Navarro on December 04, 2016:
Great article it helped me enormously :-)
Kacy Aerin on November 26, 2016:
I'm 48 and I have struggled with my gender identity my whole life, its caused me anxiety and held me back from living life to its fullest.
I'm not hyper-femme, im more butch, but there are alot of ways to "be a woman"
I've been more or less androgenous for years, but have periodically sought out therapy or support groups.
I had one counsellor tell me I was really gay and "confused" (I'm def bi). Another counsellor called me a liar. Since I dress butch,support group sisters have rejected me for not dressing in skirts and heels ("why would you want to be a girl and dress like THAT")
I had planned to self medicate and a good ts sister talked me out of it.
Thank God I finally found a medical services provider who gets it. I told her my story and she wrote me a script for estrogen on the first visit. Over the next 6 months we'll increase the dosage, add spiro and finastride. With documentation from the clinic my health insurance is covering treatment. It only took 2 weeks to straighten things out with them.
I'm so happy to be receiving hormones under medical supervision.
I feel happy and grateful and am becoming much more comfortable with my place in this world.
Jessica Joy Jefferson on September 05, 2016:
i live in Bahrain, where i am not allowed to be transgendered at all! i live here because of my family setting up a school in Riyadh and a school in Manama. i do not know what to do! i was back in New Zealand for a holiday for a short time meeting all of my transgendered friends at tranzform, but now i am back in a prejudiced country that wont let me be who i really am. i am completely cut off from any moral support here. it upsets me greatly: i know that i would make a beautiful woman, but my family is not very supportive of me. My father, mother and sister just say that i look like and walk like a "gay man" when i dress as a woman. They also want to force me to continue working at the Multinational School and seeing the man that i love (who will never love me back. i really need to change in order to find my own man.) at work, with me dressed as a man. i really, really do not want to do that. i don't want to go out tomorrow for my birthday, either. i will be forced to dress as a man if i go outside. No one in my family sympathizes with me at all! i have mild Aspergers, so it does have an effect on my independance and social skills. But i want to go to the UK to fix that, by going to the Priory group to help me with my OCD, depression, anxiety and autism. i also want to try TMS to help erradicate some of my Aspergers if possible. i can't do either of those things in Bahrain. My last pyschiatrist was a lunatic! She told all my secrets to my maid, gave bad advice and said that i did not need medication.
i am hoping that i will be able to start living in New Zealand and taking hormones by December this year. But my mother does not like the idea and both her and my father refuse to think of me as their daughter. One moment they promise to help me pay for my hormones and surgery and the next they are saying i should pay for it all. They are a bunch of liars. And both of them keep on calling me by my male name and using male pronouns, even when i am dressed as a woman! My father says he is liberal, but he does not apply that to the transgender issue. He also ignores the fact that i told both him and mother multiple times that i am a woman in a man's body. Mother does, too! i always used to play with Barbie dolls as a child, i loved girly things, i loved being the princess in a play, i used to wear girl's clothes, i would wear my mother's makeup, i would wear my sister's makeup and i hated the sight of my genitals. i still do. i can't do anything that i want to do in this body. i also used to be forced fo line up in the boy's line at school and i hated that. Another thing i did was to erase my name on my workbook and write a girl's name there instead. i also loved being thought of as a girl by others.
i can't wait for the day i can wear Manolo Blahnik shoes, Chanel clothes and Fendi fur coats. i can't wait for the day i can have a handsome boyfriend, who will one day be my handsome husband. i hope to one day be thought of as a woman and hang out with the other girls fully as a girl. i want to be loved and made to feel beautiful. This bigoted country prevents me from doing that. i hate the Middle East and i hate islam! Because of it, i can't be who i really am. And my parents have very few qualms about the lack of rights i have! They don't believe i am trans at all! They keep on accusing me of being a gay man, when i am not attracted ro gay men and i don't like the idea of anal intercourse! i am alone and afraid.
i went to a pyschiatrist today in Bahrain with my sister who said that they could fix my OCD and also fix my depression with mood stabilizers. I was hoping to be able to start HRT in December this year or January next year, but my mother said on the phone to me and my sister after my session that she did not think I could start it until a year from now! But I am 24 already and I am worried that if I get much older, it will be harder for me to pass as female. I also don't want to get too old where a gorgeous looking guy won't love me and I will npt be considerd youthful or pretty anymore. She thinks that 6 months is the minimum. I am also sick and tired of beimg addressed as a male and not being allowed to wear women's clothes.
What can i do to make my family see the light?
Jessica on September 05, 2016:
Hi there people!
Biannica Marie Feringa on July 26, 2016:
I have been living as a woman for over 20 years off and on as I have had to hide who I am so that way my family would not find out I just would like to be able to finally had the chance to be a woman because I was born in a man's body and knew that I was always meant to be a woman and I just would really like to be out of just get this change done and over with and I know that it starts with the hormone therapy and the estrogen levels in my estrogen levels are that of a woman almost anyhow so I am asking that maybe somebody might be able to give me some insight as to what I can do I had to hide everything from my father to this way he would not disown me as he gave me the same name as him I was born Robert Eugene Feringa Jr and I had a struggle because I knew that my father would disown me if he ever found out so now 20 years later and looking so much forward to being able to be who I was truly meant to be and I just want to get this done and over with so this way I can be happy again
Marquis penn on April 27, 2016:
I really put all my trust into you guys thanks
nicole espinola on February 13, 2016:
i want to undergo for hrt im already 26 years old,,can you help me to have it?
Jhale Moreno on December 11, 2015:
Shayna Lynn's opinion is not directly as negative as it appears to read if you go over it carelessly. It is confoundingly unbiased and biased at the same time. The page WARNING FOR THOSE CONSIDERING MtF SRS actually uses lies such as Renee Richards regretting her sex change after living most of her life. (Renee only hated becoming a public icon of controversy who was only viewed as a transgender or a man playing a woman's game and no longer being valued for her sports achievements.) Renee's quotes are clearly directed to other people and they include outdated quotes for when there was less transgender publicity (1999) after stating the lie of regret.
But, the rest of the website seems to simply advocate fear of making the choice unwisely and is pro-therapy, like Shayna Lynn is on this page. They both stated that only a few transgenders have illusions of what they really feel. However, they list a large amount of traits that these people would fall into and they emphasize how you can go so long before realizing how much you regret the change. That is just exaggeration and disbelief that someone can accept a transformation of body that violates Freud's principles.
Shayna Lynn and Lynn Conway are lying by pretending to be super-experienced in transgender life. Maybe they are experienced with many years of history, but there was never a broadening of understanding of the issues, especially for contemporary times. There is not yet an established textbook certainty of being educated of transgender issues, but both women profess to have such an education.
They are hiding their anti-transgender propaganda along with bits of positive, correct information. But their biggest crime is promoting lies about how the suicide rates of transgenders is just an exaggeration by the LGBT communities. These people are the most seriously dangerous and twisted promoters of ignorance and hatred.
The idea of transgender people lots of therapy is rather foolish. The person who said that it was just 12 hours of therapy was absolutely lying. The HRT approval requires 6 months of therapy.
Also, to post this idea on comments about hormone prescriptions with the simple-minded view that all transgenders use surgery when HRT is being talked about is just plain nonsense, but seems to come up 1,000 times.
ChristieMeows on September 18, 2015:
Wait, so does that mean (even though I have no genital dysphoria AT ALL) that I am not allowed to take hormones? I don't understand... Like, I do want to be a girl,too. It would be a "dream come true" for me. I don't mean to sound like a bitch, though that's how I seem to come across every time I talk to someone, but I identify as a Non-Op (yes, they exist), and all I can gather from reading this is that only "true" transgenders are allowed the pleasure of feminizing their bodies without the use of risky surgeries. I, for one, am very confused; but I do understand that, while I don't have dysphoria like most of the community, I would like to take hormones without getting silicone implants in my butt and breasts or ribs removed or my jaw bone sawed away to round it off, or my nose 'trimmed', or even liposuction. I would rather gain fatty deposits through hormones, and let my body naturally re-shape itself. Is this not allowed within our community, or am I just being a paranoid little bitch? 'Cuz if I'm being a paranoid little bitch, please don't be harsh. I know how rude people can be on the internet, and I personally really don't want to deal with internet drama. But, either way, please, someone tell me which one it is.