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How to Read a Dating Profile

I specializes in coaching women (dating and relationship) read and decode men including helping them build self-estem/confidence.

Profile info and pic can say a lot about a person

Profile information can be as just as unreliable as a cover letter and a resume in reviewing job applications. You know what I mean; and most likely, can relate to what I’m talking about, right?

It’s all about learning how to “read between the lines” and instead of looking for congruency, you look for “incongruencies” (inconsistencies).

For example: If they say they like “working out” but you can tell from their pictures they are overweight; that’s inconsistency, don’t you agree? Or if they say, “homebody” but their many of their pictures are at the bar or in a party, is that consistent?

There’s nothing wrong with being overweight or being a party animal, it’s the inconsistencies that I’m pointing out. You also need to understand that, “some people alter their personality or persona based on the type of person they are looking for and want to attract”. This is a big NO, NO! or else, they will like this “pretend persona” instead of the real YOU.

You want to stay true to yourself and be yourself so you will be attracting the right person who will like you and love you for who you are.

Having said that, you need to decode yourself first. Know who you really are and look for that type of particular person who shares the same likes, wants, desires, preferences, beliefs (not necessarily religious beliefs, just beliefs in general), etc.
For example: If you like animals, you look for clues in their profile and pictures for something that is related to animals. Pay attention to backgrounds of their pictures.
“You can tell a lot about someone by they way they treat animals!!”

Pay attention to their age (their generation). Are their “likes (including pages, websites, etc.)”, “hobbies/interests”, “music”, “videos”, etc. matching their generation? Does it match yours?

For example: Some (not all) people who like “oldies” (previous older generation) music may be an indication that they learned to love and enjoy “oldies” because of their closeness to someone older (like their parents).

Did you know that many employers are also checking out social media accounts of their short listed applicants (aka “Social Media Hiring”)?

Social media account says a lot about an individual because this is what is supposed to be their “true self”. There’s an old saying, “Tell Me Who Your Friends Are, I’ll Tell You Who You Are”. That also applies in hiring and in dating. Learn to be an online stalker! I know it may sounds bad, but it’s all about the intentions. It’s only bad if you have bad intentions.

Just like the difference between “influencing” and “manipulation”; only the “intention” of the person that makes a huge difference.

That’s it for now; there’s plenty more but if I continue and write everything, this article can turn into a book or novel. My whole point in writing this article is… “INVESTIGATE before you INVEST your time”.

Do you have any tips and tricks about reading dating profiles? If so, please share and comment them below. I will be closely monitoring all comments and will be responding to all of you.

Do you want to know something about anything related to dating and relationship? Just ask away and I’ll be more than happy to write an article about it.
If you do not want others to see your question, issue, or concern, you can always send me a private message.

GOOD LUCK TO ALL and I wish that you find what you are looking for. And remember, I’m just a keyboard away from you!

Comments

Jordan Findley (author) from United States on September 25, 2020:

I strongly agree with everything you wrote. I would like to add these though...

The term "garbage in, garbage out" applies in dating profile. As a result, they are attracting the wrong person.

The "once they "meet me" my charming personality and sense of humor will "win them over"" mentality only applies when applying for a job. A job requires knowledge and skills for the job we are applying for. A job is just 8 hrs a day, 5 days a week.

However, when it comes to our relationship, IT'S OUR LIFE, 24/7. If and when we pretend to be someone else, sooner or later, our true self will come out because we will get burned out and will be unhappy with the person we attracted..

dashingscorpio from Chicago on September 25, 2020:

"You want to stay true to yourself and be yourself so you will be attracting the right person who will like you and love you for who you are." - Excellent advice!

The problem with a lot of online daters is their ego becomes bruised when they are not getting much responses or dates. The same thing happens with sending out job resumes.

The first thing anyone does is attempt to (revise) their resume or profile in order to "attract" a higher number of responses.

Some people might choose to "shave off" a few years because they believe a lot of folks are NOT searching for women/men in their actual age range.

Since (they) believe they look younger than they are, a 40 year old might list themselves as 35 or a 50 year old as a 45.

Others have been known to add 1-2 inches to their height or they're now overweight and use a photo when they were slimmer. Some just use an extreme close up of their face or a "body part" to draw the viewer in as opposed to having any photos which reveal their whole physique.

They justify these "white lies" because competition is stiff and they believe a lot of people are on the (surface) "shallow".

However once they "meet me" my charming personality and sense of humor will "win them over" and my "white lies" won't really matter.

At least that's what many people tell themselves. From their point of view all they're trying to do is {get their foot into the door}.

Everyone wants to be "chosen" and many will do anything for a yes.

Unfortunately misleading people rarely leads to a happy ending.

They end up going on a first date and never hearing from that person again and can't figure out (why). If your appearance and personality do not match your profile odds are the other person will move on.

Another thing which frustrates people is many of them chase after those who are out of their league.

In the real world a guy who looks like Danny DeVito is not going to end up with a girlfriend who looks like Charlize Theron! And yet you have these guys sending flirts and emojis to every "hot looking woman" wondering why they struck out.

The reason why there are so many lonely "nice guys" and "nice girls" is because they are not attracted to each other!

Nobody wants the "low hanging fruit". Everyone wants someone on their arm who will make others envious of them.

Don't expect to sit next to the moon unless (you) are a star!