Adrienne is a certified dog trainer, former veterinary assistant, and author of the online dog training course "Brain Training for Dogs."
The act of role playing is a sexual fantasy that can be added to a couple's life. This sexual fantasy generally involves the presence of some characters which are animated by the couple. The couple therefore basically become actors which take part in different erotic scenarios that can add a touch of magic in long term commitments.
There are many advantages of role playing. First of all, role playing is all about fantasy. Perhaps we all have had in our minds a special fantasy that we wished to have enacted but really never confessed to anyone. Women may have always dreamed of being saved by a knight in shining armor or having a story with Zorro. Men on the other hand may be fascinated by the beauties of the exotic dancers or the innocence of a nun.
The great part of role playing is that all these dreams can come true but in the safety of well established couples. No need to worry about infidelities, STD's or hurt feelings. There you are impersonating a special role with your loved one and enjoying each other's roles safely. The best thing is that you are imagining to live a story with a stranger, but under that stranger is your loved one and there are no feelings of guilt nor of wrong doing.
Role playing indeed can rekindle romance and add a special spark to long term commitments. Indeed, it is a true sad fact that often relationships may turn boring at some point or another. Years of marriages or long term relationships may lose their spark at times, as couples start settling like old flour in a jar.
For those who love acting, the role playing session can be organized with a script and even be taped to watch in the future. Indeed, role playing videos may be healthy alternatives to porn watching, where couples end up watching and enjoying the presence of strangers rather than each other. Role playing therefore re-unites rather than separating.
Role Playing should be carried out only by an established couple that is not too shy and is open to fresh ideas. It must be remembered that it is just a game to just spice up things a bit. If one spouse starts depending too much on role playing or tries to carry out scenes to which the other is not comfortable in, it should be stopped. In healthy role playing there is no space for humiliation or violence. It is just a happy game to play every now and then.
Following are some common role playing scenarios:
Role Playing Ideas and Scenarios
- Hospital Fantasies: women turn out to be curvy nurses and men are fascinating doctors. The background is a familiar office visit where one takes care of the other.
- Goddess Worship: women turn out being powerful goddesses that are worshiped by males. Because of their power they take dominant roles.
- Uniform Fantasies; countless women are fascinated by uniforms. Men can dress up as cops and mimic an arrest or they can become sexy J.I Joes and camouflage as Army soldiers. Women make sexy cops as well especially when they handcuff their man and lose the key...
- Innocent Nuns/Priests :Some men may find the innocence of nuns irresistible. Perhaps what makes nuns and priests hot in role playing is the fact that there may be a belief that they may hinder a wild side under their innocent clothing.
- Submissive Staff: Sometimes submissive roles are found sexy. For instance, the waitress or the French Maid may look sexy because they are felt to be servants and therefore men may feel potent in asking them favors.
So Why Engage in Role Play?
The benefits of role playing are not something that just popped up out of nowhere. There are experts on the field that actually recommend role playing to spice marriages and add a touch of magic. There are really no disadvantages when it comes to adding a new idea that will revive a stale relationship, and if this requires some role playing, then couples should go for it.
The idea may appear awkward at first, but it appears that with time, couples start feeling comfortable in acting out their roles as they loosen up their inhibitions and most of them end up having lots of fun. Indeed, more likely than not, role playing does not end up as a one time event. Rather, often couples feel the need to repeat and add new scenes as their love lives take a twist for the best.
According to Scott Haltzman an M.D, and author of the great book, The Secrets of Happily Married Men '"Part of enjoying tantalizing sex is experiencing a level of escape, role playing interweaves well with the natural tendency to dissociate from the daily demands of life. It helps your woman experience more liberation under the covers, because she can put herself mentally in a different, more exciting place."
So why not have fun and perhaps, make this Valentine's day a commitment to give role playing a try? You may unleash the inner actors trapped in yourself and find a newer sense of closeness thanks to a great gift humans will be forever equipped with; imagination.....
Sophie Sharpe from London on October 06, 2018:
love this perspective!
Chankeylong from Banana Republic on June 01, 2012:
No doubt, that the moment when lovers lose the interest to each other comes for the most of couples. And in such cases role play can help to return the passion in a sexual life.
Don't hesitate to make experiments, it's much better than divorce of living unhappy.
jimmy on May 04, 2012:
Thanks for commenting must65gt. Some people understand what you are saying. My wife and I role play sometimes and I appreciate the scripture quotes. She is all I think of and we just have fun. Your comments put it in perspective. Keep up the good work.
hartingale on February 05, 2011:
I use a pole dancing pole with my partner https://hubpages.com/relationships/Poledancingpole it helps give a theme to roe play evenings and allows us to get into character more easily as we use it as a prop (literally and metaphorically)
tim on December 01, 2010:
I agree with you Brian: not all religious people think like must65gt though. I would call myself religious, but find must65gt statement well off track.
Brian on November 19, 2010:
Wow don't you hate when religious people take some simple, harmless, clean fun and demonize it out of proportion. I'm not offended, it's just that what you said is so incredibly stupid and out of place; it's awkward, rude and self indulgent. I could explain in detail, but I just don't have the time or inclination. By the way, I've never actually role played, but it's a perfectly fine activity to bring a couple closer together.
LizzyBoo from Czech Republic on January 03, 2010:
I never experienced a role playing in relatonship. Thanks for advice. Lizzy
must65gt on January 02, 2010:
Interesting hub, my thoughts however are of caution. I can see the possible benefits of the role playing scenario, but it begs the question, are the individuals in fulfilling their fantasies, inwardly thinking of a person they previously encountered and thinking of that individual during the role play? In essence, they may be fantasizing they are making love to another person. By doing so; using their mate as a surrogate and possibly taking the first step in cheating. If we become obsessed with fantasies it’s possible we may start delving deeper into areas that bring higher sexual stimulation and making it's importance prevalent, thereby removing portions of the love, romance, trust and feelings built with a partner. We may see increasing evidence that we are not controlling our passions. They're beginning to control us. I fervently believe that if you are in a healthy relationship, you are making love to the person you want to be with and your sexual pleasures will build as you’re relationship develops. I know that many on here may not have the same devotion and mind set that I have for my God and my savior, and I may be thought of as a zealot. However, I believe that when we allow ourselves to be slowly manipulated in minute increments away from the biblical teachings, we open ourselves up for hurt and mental anguish. If I may quote from scripture:
But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
We have to gird ourselves from these to prevent ourselves from being drawn into physical desires, and replacing the Agape love with lust and impure thoughts.
You will have these tassels to look at and so you will remember all the commands of the LORD, that you may obey them and not prostitute yourselves by going after the lusts of your own hearts and eyes.
I appreciate your thoughts and expressions in this hub and I hope you will not be offended by my views.
Anath on December 29, 2009:
I love role playing whether it is playing the caring nurse, the innocent girly or the dominant Mistress.