Updated date:

4 Simple Ways to Get Rid of Toxic Relationships in Your Life

Shibangi is currently a student and likes to write on various aspects of the relationships in her life, she has been facing till now.

Introduction

We, human beings, get familiar with relationships as soon as we take birth. From parents to grandparents, many persons get connected with us unknowingly. Further, in the process of growing up, we meet different persons and we choose who we want to remain in touch with.

In the process of forming relationships and maintaining the previous ones, unfortunately, we get to face its destructive side.

Now, if we get emotionally attached to someone, it’s not easy to cut off the contact with him or her. This kind of condition only leads to confusion in decision making.

We get confused about whether the relationship, which turned out to be toxic, should be mended or broken.

So, when you find your mind has accumulated with this confusion, below you can find some practices which will help you get out of toxic relationships in your life.

1) Use Silence as a Weapon And Save Energy

Now, you have a choice to walk out of someone’s life after experiencing a terrible trust issue. The person may be the one with whom you were having a really beautiful love life or an amazing friendship. No matter how strongly you were connected with them, you will gradually succeed in walking away.

But what if an issue arises with some of your family members? Walking away from your family is never too easy.

After all, problems don’t vanish if avoided. They need to be faced. Therefore, conversations are needed, but sometimes it doesn’t work too; rather it often creates a mess.

The best way to clear this mess is to remain silent. It may sound being submissive, but it does work. If you remain silent while the other person is arguing, the advantage is all yours.

You must be wondering, how being silent in an argument will provide any benefit? Well, here is the answer to your question

Arguing with someone takes up a lot of energy, as you have to anyhow prove your dominance over the other. In short, you will be saving your energy remaining silent rather than spending it in being exhausted!

After a couple of hours or maybe even one to two days, they would eventually understand and feel guilty about what they did, finally making peace with you.

2) Ignorance: A Wonderful Bliss

Ignoring someone is rude, right? But it works wonder if you do it precisely, in the right place and time. Now, direct ignorance may create trouble. So, there are some amazing ways to do this indirectly without planting any seed of disturbance:

  • Whenever you smell an argument or disturbance coming towards you, start engrossing yourself with some or other stuff. Reading a book, listening to motivational talks, and do whatever you like, but keep yourself busy at that time.
  • Most importantly, the work you are doing should seem to them as important even if it is not to you. This would stop them to approach you with their nonsensical stuff.
  • Going outside, even if in the balcony, having some fresh air and keeping your ears plugged with earphones playing music is another way to deal with toxic people.
  • If they come to you and start shouting, it doesn’t matter because their irritating voice won’t reach your ears.
  • Listen to them when they approach you with some actual work. Don’t let them feel they are being avoided.
  • This behavior of yours will assure them that you are not against them and they will most of the time let you be as you are.

3) Self-respect is Important

It is often seen that most of the people don’t want to break off the connection they have with a toxic person. In other words, we can say that the former ones are excessively obsessed with the latter ones.

This obsession only creates the actual problem, by keeping them tied with a state of mental disturbance. These are the people who knowingly or unknowingly deteriorate themselves. If you are one of them, read further carefully.

On the streets near our locality, many cows roam here and there. A bell usually hangs around their neck. Now, what I’m trying to show you is that these cows roam around freely the whole day except the early morning hours.

The reason is that the owners of these domestic animals take them to the house only when needed. The morning hour is the time when milkmen distribute milk. Hence, for distributing milk, the cows are needed.

After extracting all their needs, they again leave these cows into the street. The owners do not care about what those poor animals would eat for the whole day. Instead, they beat them if they are not willing to obey them.

Now imagine yourself as one of these cows. Place yourself in a situation where there is nobody to care about you. Everyone expects you to care about them. Do you want to be treated like that? Ask yourself.

If yes, then it is up to you if you want to live under someone’s pity. If no, then remember, nothing is more important than your self-respect. If someone doesn’t respect you and care about you, then that person is neither worthy of your love nor your time.

4) You Can’t Change Others, but Yourself

Toxic relationships are poisonous. They don’t seem dangerous at all. But they make you almost dead in a very painful way.

Everyone thinks that they can mend the distorted relationship by changing the mindset of a person. But it’s not that easy as it seems to be. In the process, the situation worsens even more.

Walking away from problems is always not an option; rather you must face it by bringing some positive changes in yourself. Trying to change others is only a waste of time.

Conclusion

By practicing the above ways, you will surely be able to get rid of the toxic relationships. Remember, a calm mind is full of various solutions to any problem in life.
You can eliminate the toxicity calmly rather than getting much tense. So, these were some ways to deal with the confusion about whether to mend or break the relationship.
Let me know if you have some other ways to remain calm and at the same time to eliminate the toxicity in your life!

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2020 Shibangi Das

Comments

Shibangi Das (author) from Paradeep, Jagatsinghpur, Odisha on September 03, 2020:

Thanks, Avyukth! I am glad you agreed with me. I have so many friends who seem to cling on persons who don't value them at all as you said. I try to make them understand but it is of no use. I leave them in their condition hoping that maybe a tragedy could make them understand the reality.

Avyukth Krishna from Bangalore on August 26, 2020:

Hey Shibangi,

This is another amazing article from you. I couldn't agree more with your first point of using silence as a weapon. Sometimes the best thing to do is to just remain silent. At the end of the day, we should realise that our time and energy are worth more important than giving someone a piece of our mind. Especially when the other person has decided to contradict everything that you say.

I also like the point on self respect. People often cling on to someone because their self esteem depends on it. They need someone to tell them that they are amazing without which they feel worthless. So one needs to start developing a strong sense of self respect so that outside circumstances or people cannot change how you feel about yourself.

Keep writing ! Looking forward to reading more of your wonderful articles.

Shibangi Das (author) from Paradeep, Jagatsinghpur, Odisha on August 24, 2020:

That's true, dashingscorpio. Suffering is optional. It depends on you whether you want to suffer or not.

Shibangi Das (author) from Paradeep, Jagatsinghpur, Odisha on August 24, 2020:

Thank you Manik!

Shibangi Das (author) from Paradeep, Jagatsinghpur, Odisha on August 24, 2020:

Thank you Sowrabha ma'am

Shibangi Das (author) from Paradeep, Jagatsinghpur, Odisha on August 24, 2020:

Thank you, Nikhil! Ignorance is indeed a powerful tool to bring positivity into our life.

Shibangi Das (author) from Paradeep, Jagatsinghpur, Odisha on August 24, 2020:

Thank you, Sanjyoti!

Shibangi Das (author) from Paradeep, Jagatsinghpur, Odisha on August 24, 2020:

Thank you, Umesh for your appreciation and I am glad that my tips might help you.

Umesh Chandra Bhatt from Kharghar, Navi Mumbai, India on August 24, 2020:

Good tips. Would help in tense times. Well presented. Keep up your good work in hubpages.

Shibangi Das (author) from Paradeep, Jagatsinghpur, Odisha on August 24, 2020:

Thank you Suchi ma'am! And nice mantra ma'am, everyone should follow it when needed.

Sanjyoti Das on August 21, 2020:

It seems as if a lot of thought and effort has gone into writing the above article.beautifully elaborated and so accurate

Keep writing✒

Your ingenuity must be shared with the world

dashingscorpio from Chicago on August 17, 2020:

Each of us gets to (choose) our own friends, lovers, and spouse.

We also get to (choose) who we spend our time with.

No one is "stuck" with anyone! Suffering is optional.

Nikhil Sharma from India on August 16, 2020:

Hey, Shibangi.

First of all, congratulations to come up with such an interesting topic. And secondly, congrats for writing this article with such an ease that even a tenth standard student will understand it. As you said, ignorance is the powerful tool that one can use to overcome a toxic relationship or get rid of any toxic person. Nicely written article from you. Keep enlightening us!

Suchismita Pradhan from India on August 16, 2020:

I will always believe in one concept,ignore the fools.Whenever you smell a foul play or anything toxic,Chant only one mantra,"omm ignoraee namah"!!nice article.Keep writing.

sowspeaks from Bengaluru on August 16, 2020:

Hi Shibangi, nice take on sensible approaches to tackle toxic relationships. Well thought out!

MANIK GODARA on August 16, 2020:

Beautifully thought and written.