I'm an eclectic gal with many diverse interests. They include relationships, film, trivia, and an assortment of other things.
Democrats are Spineless Wimps
I realize that most Democrats are spineless wimps who don't believe in anything. They waffle and equivocate on every possible topic. But surprise, they actually do believe in something. You'll never hear them admit it though. They're too busy sipping their $5 soy lattes and trying to run you down with their hybrid cars.
If you don't agree with what's here, feel free to comment below. I reserve the right to add to this article based on suggestions. Because I'm sure many of you out there have strong opinions on what you think Democrats really believe.
So here's what Democrats really believe:
It's Not Okay to Execute a Murderer, But an Unborn Child is Fine
A Democrat will jump up and down like a cocaine-addled banshee about the execution of some mass murderer. However, try to engage them in talk about the slaughter of unborn children. Suddenly, mass murderer is okay. Democrats have infinite compassion for murderers. On the other hand, unborn babies? They couldn't care less. Since fetuses don't kill people, Democrats don't worry about them.
Poor People Should Be Able to Leach Off Society Endlessly
Go find the laziest, fattest, most criminally-minded unemployed person you can. Naturally, a Democrat will argue that the government should give that person money. Democrats love welfare like junkies love crack. Of course, welfare solves every problem. We should give people who don't work money forever. It helps! And we wonder why there's a deficit.
A Gay Man Should Be Able to Marry a Goat
When we start sanctioning marriage between people who make sinful lifestyle choices, then we might as well sanction pedophilia and bestiality. Most human societies, whether they follow the Bible or not, agree that homosexuality is sinful. If we're going to sanction and condone a sinful activity such as homosexuality, why stop there?
Democrats hate America. Seemingly, all they ever do is complain about America. They never talk about how it's the greatest country in the world. Democrats just want to complain. In fact, it seems that there's nothing they enjoy more than pilling on the U.S. for virtually everything it does. After 9/11, when the United States justifiably captured and interrogated Muslim extremists, Democrats lined up like children at a candy store to demand that the detainees be treated like house guests. Democrats don't seem to understand that when you deal with evil, a slap on the hand isn't going to do anything. However, do they criticize Saudi Arabia or Pakistan? Of course not. It's always the United States that's doing something wrong.
There is No God
If you want to find an Athiest, just head to your nearest Democratic caucus meeting. Athiests are all Democrats. They'd like nothing more to see the word "God" taken out of the Pledge of Allegiance and off our currency. In fact, as far as Democrats are concerned, there should be no mention of God ever. Democrats don't say "Merry Christmas", they say "Happy Holidays" because "Christ" is in "Christmas" and that's religious and it might offend somebody.
The Government is Better Than Private Business at Everything
Democrats certainly behave like business is evil. Regulate, regulate, regulate is the Democratic mantra.
The Purple Birds Are More Important Than the Unborn Children
Democrats don't give a crap about unborn children, but they certainly seem to get in a huff if a housing development might go up where some speckled mouse or purple bird might be displaced. Only when patriotic Americans become an endangered species will Democrats being to care.
All People Should Be Forced to Drive Electric Cars
If I want to drive a truck that gets 10 miles to the gallon, then that's my right as an American to do that if I can afford it. Ask a Democrat though, and every one of us should be forced to drive a Prius or some other little death box so that we don't waste so much gasoline. Of course, that's what they say. Most Democrats talk a good game and then drive away in their SUV's to their overheated or overcooled houses. Do Democrats really sacrifice more than Republicans when it comes to conspicuous consumption? Of course they don't. In fact, like the hypocrites they are, they're often worse.
Give a Democrat Your Last Dollar, He'll Ask for Three
Democrats, for all their protestations about believing in science and math, don't seem to understand this basic equation: 1 - 1 = 0. Tell a Democrat that you have one dollar to spend and they'll spend three or ten or twenty or several million. Democrats cannot stop spending and spending and spending and that's why our country is in the financial trouble it's in. America isn't just on its last dollar. It's on several trillion borrowed dollars. Yet still, Democrats want to spend more.
Only Criminals Should Have Guns
This is effectively what Democrats believe because they work so hard to regulate guns. They don't seem to get that gun control only puts restrictions on the law-abiding citizens who want to get a gun to protect themselves, not the criminals who are committing crimes who will always find a way to get a gun no matter what the law says. Democrats want regular people to be at the mercy of gun-toting criminals.
Only Democrats Should Determine What People Say and Believe
Where do you think political correctness came from? It didn't come from Republicans, I can tell you that. It came from Democrats who decided that things like having white people running around saying "black person" instead of "African-American person" was intolerable and needed to be changed and then forced down everyone's throat.
I'm sure some people have found what I've written to be funny and others have found it to be highly offensive. It may be the most incisive thing I've ever written or the most inane. While I certainly don't want anybody to feel angry toward me, you should know that I haven't written this article based on any specific feelings I have. I have written it using the hyperbole of politics that seems to misinform and inform so many people. If that results in both laughter and anger, then the article has served its purpose. My intention is to spark a debate and cause people to think or to respond.
Please note below in the link section that I have written a similar article about the other party. If I'm going to offend, I'm an equal opportunity offender. I hope no matter your position, you read both articles to see if I'm exaggerating fairly.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2011 Sychophantastic
Grace Marguerite Williams from the Greatest City In The World-New York City, New York on September 03, 2012:
While I am staunchly pro-choice and pro-gay marriage, I am totally against the principles that poor people who do not intentionally work should receive taxpayers' assistance. I would like to add a subprinciple to that a poor person simply cannot better himself/herself because there are "no opportunities out there" especially for the poor. I totally agree with the principle that some Democrats have a strong animus against this GREAT NATION. These "Democrats" should be called SOCIALISTS or better yet COMMUNISTS as they are not true Democrats. Democrats, by my definition, still believe in the greatness and potential of the United States. Yes, it can be better but so far it isn't bad!
Hillbilly Zen from Kentucky on October 25, 2011:
Since this doesn't seem to have been addressed in the other comments, let me just say that you've offended Hillbillies as well! Great Hub(s) - voted up and funny!
firstname.lastname@example.org from upstate, NY on October 04, 2011:
I'll update my last post to say, many Democrats not most Democrats.-WBA
email@example.com from upstate, NY on October 03, 2011:
"I realize that most Democrats appear to be spineless wimps who don't believe in anything, who waffle and equivocate on every possible topic, but surprise, they actually do believe in something. You'd just be hard-pressed to get them to admit it when they're not sipping on their $5 soy lattes and trying to run you down in their hybrid cars."
This is great humor,and pretty much true! Great hub, this is exaltly what I feel about most Democrats!
I also agree with your comments on Democrats creed to,
"never punish the perp!"-WBA
htodd from United States on October 01, 2011:
Texasbeta on October 01, 2011:
Dems believe in regulating the corporations, because corporations abuse the population and workforce at every chance they get. We don't believe in self regulation, because no corporation has displayed a single moment in history when they have actually self regulated. Publicly traded corporations are legally mandated to maximize profit at the expense of everything. Regulations are a reaction to an act that was already committed, not out of thin air.
Dems don't want your guns. We don't care. We just don't think you need a tank and a fully automatic AK. I have guns and I am a huge liberal.
It isn't the right of old white men to tell women what they can do with their bodies. Period.
Religion - Nope, most Dems are Christians. I am not, but most are. We just don't want YOUR version of YOUR religion pushed down everyone's throats. Keep it at your house. Teach your own kids what you believe, not mine.
Prius' are awesome. Republicans deny anything that would add additional overhead, so they deny things like a climate problem, or greenhouse gases, down to the point that they have to create their own reality in order to believe what they believe. Dems accept reality and work from there.
Dem spending - Actually, Reagan tripled the size of government and debt, Bush expanded the size of government and debt, Clinton ended up with a surplus, and then Bush tripled the size of government and tripled the debt. Obama expanded the debt too...had to deal with the largest recession in 80s years, and the only way any country on the planet deals with that is deficit spending to keep the cash flow moving. That costs money. It is also basic economics taught in the first week of every economic class on the planet.
Dems demand you believe what they believe - Actually, we are diametrically opposed to this. It is Republicans who want to legally mandate that everyone gets on board with things like pushing their version of religion into every public arena. Political correctness is your example? There was no legal mandate for anything like that. It was socially accepted so you were shunned when you called a Mexican a spick. Sorry you can't be racist without people looking at you funny. You, on the other hand, want to legally mandate that your beliefs are pushed on me. That is quite a bit different and quite hypocritcal.
Welfare - We do believe in safety nets. Are you aware that you already got welfare reform in 96? Are you aware that up to 90% of all welfare fraud committed is by hospitals, insurance companies, and private companies? Yeah, I doubt it.
The bottom line of what separates us is Dems look for actual context, history, and facts when making decisions. Republicans like to create their own reality in order to continue to believe fairy tales. Republicans look at what benefits them personally, while Dems look at what benefits everyone. Republicans are reactionary and somewhat juvenile, while Dems are grown ups.
American Romance from America on October 01, 2011:
Peter, Why write a boring one titled What Americans Really Believe? ........she answered it with Democrats doing goats! LOL!
American Romance from America on September 30, 2011:
I loved the marry a goat one! VOTED UP! Your dead on with this one!
Sychophantastic (author) from Texas on September 30, 2011:
And incidentally, I really appreciate all who respond. It's important to express yourself whether you agree or disagree. You can address specific points or just the general tone of the thing or whatever you want. It's all open for debate and discussion.
Sychophantastic (author) from Texas on September 30, 2011:
Peter, I think you think it's more caustic because this is your side. I tried to be equally offensive to both sides. The point of both articles was to offend to promote discussion, though I believe I accurately portrayed what each side thinks of the other. I wrote this one as though I were a Republican and I wrote the Republican one from the Democrat's point-of-view. Of course, they're extreme positions and I'm not claiming to believe what I wrote. I find this type of exercise to be useful. GNelson believes I was more accurate with the Dems. Interesting. All your responses are interesting. I think we all read what we want into these things.
PETER LUMETTA from KENAI, ALAKSA on September 30, 2011:
This one seems to be a little more castic than the republican one. So you're more conservative than liberal, big deal. Labels are not fun. The next one should be "What do Americans Really Believe?"
Kimberlyann331 on September 30, 2011:
I agree with GNelson. Also. When it comes to Homosexual Marriage it should be none of the governments business who marries who. Marriage is a religious institution, the state has no right to pass judgement in those matters, and neither do you. It's their life, calling it sinful is irrelevant, because we are all sinners.
As well you should think about all the good your finger pointing and name calling does. Both sides are corrupted beyond belief, they only way to fix these problems is to work together. Compromise is mandatory on both ends in order for our nation to get its shit together.
GNelson from Florida on September 30, 2011:
I think you were more acurate with the Republicans. You didn't mention that niether party represents the middle class. There should be another choice on all ballots, " None of the above, Try again."