Narcissistic people: we are victims of a mixture of genes and psychological factors who covet more understanding, less judgement, more studying and less loathing from all people around us or who get acquainted to us.
- Have you ever asked yourself about the origin of narcissism?
- Do you have the enough knowledge to recognize them among the persons surrounding you ?
- What are the traits that enables you to recognize them ?
- Why people have fascination towards narcissistic people at the first sight of them ? And why this fascination melted away when the ties strengthened with them ?
- Is always giving praise to children beneficial ?
- In this article you will find pleasing answers to all questions going on your mind
The Origin Of Narcissism
According to Greek mythology, there was a handsome boy called narcissus. This boy had a bountiful amount of arrogance permeating his soul His beauty and charm enthralled all women around him but, he was a fool and didn't mind to all these stuff. As he was fixated on his charm and privilege. One a day, a forest nymph Echo entranced and became obsessive by him, but he didn't give her any attention. He spurned and rejected this love. This incurred and stired the rage of Nemesis ( the goddess of revenge ). Quickly, poured his spell over him.
One a day, he drank from a pool water. Having drunk this water, he saw his reflection on the water. Love and adore haunted him. He entirely immersed in his own picture and didn't realize that it was himself. Finally, he died and after his death, a flower started to sprout where he died. When this flower grew, it bore his name (narcissus ). And from this myth, the narcissism 's disorder emerged to the humanity.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder ( NPD)
It is a disorder which emerged in early adulthood and haunted people. Represented in inflated love of their self image, lack of empathy for other people, troubled relations with others and blind yearning for admiration, care, and intention from all people around them. People with this disorder, are self centered, manipulative, demanding and selfish . Also, they have excessive arrogance leaking from each organ of their body. challenged them and humbled them, lifted them up and shrank them down. In front of any slightest criticism, they devastated to the core and their confidence melted away.
Symptoms Of Narcissistic Personality Disorder ( NPD)
Persons with narcissistic personality order suffered from many symptoms :
- Having exaggerated sense of grandiose and vanity that entrench in their minds their uniqueness on this globe. Truth to say, they looked lost to the world and seemed to be loathed among people.
- Blinding yearning for consonant praise, complement and admiration as they are their basic nourishment feeding on it to save their thirsty hearts from sentimental hunger.
- Their brain bathing in the sense of entitlement and being given special treatment . From their perspective, it is their due to be recipient of much privilege, superiority, recognition and awe from all the people around them. Also, people should comply to their wishes and if they cannot, they become useless for them.
- Living in a fantasy world of unlimited success, power, beauty and ideal love is important for them. As real world doesn't feed their perspectives, they resorted to this fantasy world in order to protect themselves from the relentless cage of inner emptiness, anguish and shame. Any person ventures to upset their fantasy world immersing in it, exposed to outrage and violence From them .
- Exploiting other without guilt or shame as they have lack of empathy and feeling towards them. For them, people considered as objects only longed for them to meet their needs. After the interest is over, they left them.
Causes Of Narcissistic Personality Disorder ( NPD)
The main exact cause of (NPD) is unknown. It is probably a mixture of genes, early childhood experiences and psychological factors like:
- Unrealistic expectation from parents
- Excessive criticism
- Over praising and excessive pampering
- Insensitive parenting
- Cultural influences
Over Praise 's Problem Given To Children To Raise Their Low Esteem
According to researches, they are two forms of praise that parents tend to give to their children who have low esteem to raise it. One of them is benign ( process praise) and the other is harmful ( person praise). Person praise refers to compliment for children as persons ( e.g., "you are marvelous !", " you are the most intelligent boy I have ever seen !" and "you are great ! ")
This kind of praise is very harmful for children as it is conditional to their performance. So, this badly affected children as they feel worthy and recognition when they only succeed in performing any task and if the fail in performing this task , they collapse and feel worthless.
In related to process praise, it means giving positive evaluation on the child's performance ( e.g.," you made a beautiful drawing !"). When children are given this kind of praise they are encouraged to set high standards of performance .
Application Carried To Prove Effects Of Praise 's Two Forms On Children
here is a test performed on 313 children by playing a game.These children are divided into three categories. The first category was given person praise, the second was given process praise and the third with no praise. Then, all of them started to play. After that, the responsible for this game exposed all these categories to failure to evaluate this hypothesis.They found out that children given person praise feel worthless and ashamed when the failed. But, for children given process praise, they didn't affect by the failure.
The Reasons Of Having Fascination Towards Narcissistic People At The First Sight Of Them And Melting The Fascination When The Ties Strengthened With Them ?
W. Keith Campbell and Stacy proposed a new model in which they discuss how the emerging relation seemed at the beginning? and what happened after days went on this relation? In order to obviously illustrate this relation, they discussed two important points:" emerging zone and "enduring zone. "
In the" emerging zone " the relation between narcissistic people and acquainted people with them started to sprout out, their initial alluring charisma represented in their charming facial expression, their neat garment and humorous behavior dazzled their sights and made them form a good impression about them without having enough proofs or information about them. Became entranced by their confidence, intelligence, sense of humor and excitement. Can't glance the horrible side of them.
In the " enduring zone ", the relation deepened and the ties strengthened .So, all deceptive appearances melted away. Quickly they overwhelmed by their arrogance and aggression. Truth to say, narcissistic people are good at making friends, acquiring popularity and social status. But, they are terrible at sustaining long term relations.
A Test Hypothesis Performed To Prove This Discussion
Delroy Paulus ( an expert on dark personalities ) has performed a prominent study over two groups: first group is the narcissistic people and the other are the people who get acquainted to them. Then, they asked the two groups to engage in speaking for 20 minutes each week. After that, he asked the people who acquainted to narcissistic people to notice their behavior in the first week and again in the last week ( seventh week).
The results showed that at the first week, narcissistic people seemed to be more " assertive", "confident", "entertaining", "exciting " and "intelligent. But in the last week they seemed to be " arrogant ", have "tendency to brag" and "hostile. "
© 2022 Nariman Ismail