How Far Would You Go To Get / Take Revenge?
So just how far would you go to take revenge on a person who had seriously hurt or upset you? I know I can be a very vindictive person if I know the person who has "done me wrong" has no remorse, or has not apologised to me, (with any sincerity). Many say revenge is not a good move, and we will only damage ourselves by doing this, (although I beg to differ within reason, as justifiable revenge has given me a great sense of relief and closure in the past).
It is not always about the obvious crimes such as infidelity, it can be so much worse, and if legal justice does not pan out, then what is so wrong with seeing justice done other ways, after all, if someone got away with murder, and ended up not being sentenced to death for it, can you blame the surviving relatives for wanting the same end result for the perpetrator?
My big question is, how far do you take it? My previous hub on the subject of revenge was fairly tame, and in general, included amusing ways to get satisfaction against those cruel and nasty individuals who have either hurt you, or made your life a misery for whatever reasons.
So where do we begin? Let's try how we would feel if someone had molested our child! My guess is that "private" revenge would include a judgement far worse than any court would impose. In my opinion this would be totally okay, as the guilty party had no mercy on the victim, therefore deserves no mercy from other humans, (especially the family of the child or children involved). Forget the "human rights" cry that "do gooders" shout, I doubt their opinions would be so rigid once their own families were the victims!
Then we could go on to someone murdering a much loved parent of ours. Would we honestly not feel incredibly in need of extreme pain and justice being inflicted on the perputrator, and could we really forgive, or show mercy to this person? I know I couldn't! I doubt I could sleep at night knowing the murderer could be released from prison at some point in the future, whilst my family member was dead forever! Anyone who has ever watched the TV series "Disorder in the Courts of America" will know how strongly feelings can run when a family member is in the same room as the criminal who hurt or killed their loved ones. Frequently the rage and anger take over, and violence ensues to a degree that all you can see is fury in the eyes of the victim's family, and all reason or ability to back down has gone from their consciousness.
What about our pets! If you knew a person had deliberately inflicted torture on your pet would you be happy to see that person taken to court, fined a couple of hundred pounds or dollars, and then walk free, when you know that had they done the same to a child they would have been locked up for it? This would never be enough for me, and I still get extremely angry at the fact the sentences for animal cruelty are so light they are hardly any deterrent at all. If it were down to me the best form of justice (or revenge) would be for the same torture to be inflicted on the human that did this to the animal.
Then we have those awful neighbours who can make your life a living hell, with loud music, unruly kids, vermin infested homes, racist abuse, vandalism of your property etc. Often it takes years to get any kind of solution to these kinds of problems, and the more complaints you make to the authorities, the more the neighbours make your life a misery, whilst nothing seems to be done by the very people who are meant to prevent this kind of behaviour. I know in these instances revenge can end up being a spiral that escalates out of control as each neighbour tries to get their own back for the previous attack, but there have to other more subtle ways of ensuring they get their comeuppance, e.g. reporting them to the authorities for benefit fraud, anonymously notifying their employer as to the kind of employee they have working for them or maybe even paying someone a few quid to have a "quiet word with them down a dark alley".
Infidelity can provoke the worst cases of revenge. The sense of betrayal and hurt are often too much for many to bear, and plenty of murders have been committed on this basis, be it of the spouse, or the person they were having an affair with. Then of course there are the occasions the innocent member of the partnership or marriage is murdered by the jealous lover who wants the affair to become a more "permanent" arrangement.
There are the gangland type revenge cases, where a member of the gang has been killed by a rival gang. These retaliations are often the most vicious, and are designed to be a warning to other gangs that this gang is "not to be messed with".
Of course we also have the cases of those who "grass up" or "give evidence against", another person to the Police. Whether or not the person "grassed up" was guilty, or deserved to be imprisoned, this is still often followed by acts of severe revenge on the "grass" themselves, hence such long term solutions as the "Witness Protection Programme".
What about rape, how would you react if it were your child, or your spouse? I doubt you would be happy to see this person get a few years in prison and then be released back into society without it dwelling on your mind! Surely you would not only want to know where this person was at all times, but would like to see them castrated as well to avoid them doing this to anyone else, (I know I would happily wield the knife to do the "operation").
Of course some of the most famous revenge cases have been from the Mafia of various countries. Anyone who has ever read the book "The Godfather" or seen the film, or perhaps followed the more recent television series "The Sopranoes", will know that there is level of respect demanded between Mafia families, and to breach this is to sign your own death warrant. The examples I have given are of course fictional, but that is not to say they are not based on excellent research by the writers, and that such things have never happened. Even now the kind of activities and shootings that went on during the Al Capone days are a matter of public record
Look at the Kray twins in London, Ronnie Kray was notorious for his violence, and few dared to cross him, and those that did suffered major consequences.
So to return to my original question, how far would you take revenge? Could you kill, would you try to make the person's life a misery or would you simply walk away and put it out of your mind?
- Revenge - Lip Smackin' Good?
An interesting look at revenge and research regarding the emotions involved in reacting to revenge.
Comments
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on May 14, 2013:
Well may she get all she deserves fkaMrsBrown.
fkaMrsBrown on May 14, 2013:
My ex-husband dated this woman for about 4 months last year. He broke up with her when he found out she was still meeting and talking with her supposed "ex" (a married man) behind his back. That guy had been corresponding with my ex-husband for almost the whole 4 months, and sent him recordings of his conversations with her in addition to stories about her wild sexual adventures with random men (my ex thought he was only her 3rd-ever man. He's a moron.). I happened to get my hands on these recordings, and in one, she calls me names and basically talks smack about me, even though I've never met the dirty slag. I gave my ex hell for even mentioning my name to her...
At any rate, this woman uses the court system like she owns it. She's always suing someone, and filed for temp restraining orders against her "ex" 3 times between 8/2012 and 1/2013 (all the while still meeting with him and being recorded, the stupid broad). The first two she never followed up on, but that last one, my ex ended up having to testify because her "ex" subpoenaed him.
I will be taking my revenge by creating a web page using all of this information, as well as the court documents from this last TRO case (which will include my ex's testimony), bringing all of my considerable search engine optimization skills, as well as a great many friends' servers on which the page will be mirrored, to bear. It may take a little bit of time, but eventually, any time someone searches for her name, her husband's, her kids', her company, her current or former addresses or even her married "ex," they'll be served up a lovely page calling her out for the sociopathic sue-happy d-bag she is.
The best part is, other than my own commentary in which I'll be calling her every name I can think of, everything I'll be putting on that page will be a matter of public record, so she has absolutely no legal recourse. Her talking crap about me isn't worth murder, but I'm sure as hell not going to feel bad about destroying her reputation using the internet. Apparently she's worked hard to not have an online presence... she'll have one when I'm through, and it ain't gonna be pretty. She f'd with the wrong b***h.
I don't believe in karma, and some people just DESERVE retribution. I'm happy to oblige.
jesus on June 23, 2012:
i'm ready to leave this world now, i'l never be happy again, the only reason dead men don't tell tales is because they usualy know secrets that are true about someone, oh and because they breathe, well she's got cancer in both breasts now, but they've mended her, seems like even kharma is bias, maybe i will confess, maybe i can get justice for me somewhere down the line, i won't be giving you anymore details though, thankyou and goodbye
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on June 14, 2012:
Thanks for your additional and valuable comments Paul.
paul on June 14, 2012:
I should have also added - societies elected "defense" against evil is the law, police, prison. Arguably, for most of the time and most cases, they are very effective. Some issues may evade the long arm of the law, then you may consider revenge. Also, with revenge, it can lead to a cycle of violence - which the only ends when someone is prepared to turn the other cheek. I would only consider revenge in the most extreme circumstances; where the offence is truly awful, where the police are ineffective, where I can be certain of identity, where I stand a reasonable chance of success (remember evil people are better at evil), where I'm prepared to do prison, where I'm prepared to leave my family to their own devices while I'm in nick, where I'm prepared for tit-for-tat violence, to me or my family - the list goes on and on, which is why I say its' not likely to happen. For lesser offences, let the police and Karma deal with it, and move on, I'd say :)
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on June 13, 2012:
Very good comment Paul. I love to rely on Karma, but sadly it doesn't always happen in our lifetime, or we don't always find out about it, therefore we still don't get the satisfaction of knowing 'justice has been done'. I have to say in many circumstances I would be more than happy to take revenge, and not all revenge has to be an imprisonable offense, although if it came down to someone having murdered my family member and justice not having been done I am sure I would throw aside my qualms about breaking the law and risk prison in order to ensure they got what they deserved. Let's hope we never have to go so far in order to get revenge :)
paul on June 13, 2012:
I've read all the posts - people assume the option of revenge may just be "there". Of course it isn't, to take revenge involves serious planning, and you would be naïve to assume you wouldn't yourself end up in the dock.
personally, I have more and more respect for kharma as I get older. However, there is a level of crime for which IMO revenge is appropriate. God forbid it arises, but if it did one would have to - in priority - make sure you get the RIGHT person, and then be prepared for the revenge act to go tits up and in fact oneself become victim, and finally be prepared to spend the rest of your life in prison. I'd do all that if I had to- but not likely to happen is it ?
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on June 12, 2012:
I believe in these instances revenge and a need for it is understandable. If justice has not been done through conventional channels, then of course you would find it hard to go through life knowing the guilty walked away unscathed. Your family member sounds truly evil, and any such instance is child abuse and should be appropriately punished.
jesus on June 12, 2012:
please answer my posts if you can, you don't have to but i would appreciate your view i also had neatdisinfectant poured into the same eye.
laptop jesus on June 12, 2012:
a close member of my family put a lighted cigarette on my eyelid when i was seven, how many times does this have to happen before it is called child abuse, i still see them regularly but i still remember what they did.
jesus on June 11, 2012:
what has made you all so bitter, stop encouraging these evil twats on this site, vengence ay, i won't retaliate bring it on.
jesus on June 06, 2012:
i feel that i've received more than my fair share of kharma, it isn't going to stop until its dun me in cor blimey.
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on June 05, 2012:
You were 13, at an age that an immature child might be curious about the opposite sex. It wasn't a good thing to do, but you too were a minor. The beating you received in 2000 was no doubt an unfortunate incident, and a coincidence. It concerns me somewhat that you say you are 'sorry to God only', so what about the child you asked to show you her genitals, her parents etc?
I strongly suggest that if this is still bothering you as much as you say it is you seek out some professional help to assist in you dealing with this.
With regards to you wanting to die you should probably read my other hub on the subject of suicide (just in case this is where your emotions are heading).
https://discover.hubpages.com/education/Do-You-Rea...
jesus on June 05, 2012:
i don't want to live in so much pain anymore, i'm probably someone you'd like to kill, i have many regrets, when i was 13 i asked a 6 year old girl to show me her genitals, i'm now middle aged, i'm not a paedo i have much guilt over this,i have'nt done anything like this since, yet feel god is still punishing me i was beaten severely 2000, i'm suffering every day feels like my face is falling of, i'm sorry to god only, i've never physically molested anyone, i want to die, i can't cope with this pain kill me.
chas229 on May 05, 2012:
I have the wisedom of king solmom,, revenge never sweet, one doing so have dig themselves two graves. for give and move on leave it to the lord. and soon you see the person going by, not doing so good or dead. rembering what brought them there in the frist place.
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on April 06, 2012:
Good comment Ellesar, I feel for you with regards to your former tenant.
Ellesar on April 06, 2012:
For the person who raped or killed my children murder would be easy - I don't really look on that as a revenge though - I would want to ensure that he never did it again, and I believe in capital punishment in 100% sure murderers of children.
Apart from such extreme circumstances I am not a very vengeful person. Once I suffered revenge from a spiteful woman - she had stayed in my flat while I was on holiday and annoyed the neighbours, ran up large bills and generally was a bit of a pain. We fell out, and her response was to dob me into the DSS for getting benefits while I was on holiday. The insult added to the injury was that SHE owed ME money!
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on April 01, 2012:
LOL, you have far more willpower and are clearly a much stronger person than I am mutagen, although that said there are still some out there I have never had revenge on even though I feel they do deserve it. It just gets too stressful to pursue it, so instead I live in the hope I will hear that something nasty has happened to them anyway.
mutagen from under my cat. on April 01, 2012:
i suppose if something bad was done personally to me i would more likely to let it go, trying to give a person second chance. but if someone hurt my closest people, then for sure i would do a horrible revenge. but i would do it only for few people.
i see things in kind of wrong way because i think everything that happens in our life comes for a reason and if something happens, it is a life lesson. also, i believe our thoughts create the world we live in, we magnetize happenings in our lives by our thoughts.
so if something happened with me i try to understand what it means and why it happened. i've had a lot of things in my life that other people would probably be unable to forget had let go, because from normal human perspective the other person would be guilty. but i believe in every situation both people are responsible for outcome. it is my way to make my problems disappear. i try to find my "blame" in everything to improve myself. sure,m a lot of situations has no my blame, like i had nothing to do to the terrorist who blew a house with my wife or things like that(example). but if someone for example hurt me and stole my car i would ask myself - why they were able to hurt me? am i so weak that i cannot protect myself?
i guess i just look at the bright side and avoid getting into more problems than i got. because for example murdering someone is a quite hard thing to do without becoming paranoid.
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on April 01, 2012:
Hi mutagen, thanks for your comment and for sharing your thoughts on the subject. I personally prefer to be sure justice is done wherever possible, and even though I do have a level of belief in Karma, I am never certain 100%, and I prefer to be sure justice is done in this lifetime, not potentially in a future lifetime. Apart from anything else it feels good to watch justice taking place first hand. Let's face it, if you had a close family member murdered you would not simply rely on Karma to sort it out and not worry about reporting the person to the Police. Additionally you would be devastated if that person got away with their crime in court and was released. I feel the same way about people who have really done the dirty on me, and whilst I would forgive them possibly if I felt they were genuinely remorseful, otherwise I feel they deserve everything they get.
mutagen from under my cat. on April 01, 2012:
mistyhorison2003, i think every situation is unique and even though i have such opinion, it is simply opinion to my own situation, mainly. in a different one i would probably have same opinion as you.
of course, due to the fact that every human sees world in his own manner, it is hard to come to similar conclusions, especially when revenge wasn't done. i believe that it is a huge change to person, committing revenge. this revenge affects both you and the one who it is made on. but still it affects you more than anyone.
i would forgive person because i know they are too stupid to understand that my revenge was made for a truly serious reason. it is easier to give up on an idiot than explain anything or give him pain he will not understand.
life hits everyone by his actions. sooner or later, you do not have to punish him. life will do it in much moreinteresting way, you just will not know about it.
i think, which is simply the way i think, i am human and can be wrong, but: revenge is destruction to the one who does it. we are not gods to decide who should get what. you do not know exactly why this person did this to you, why he became like that, who affected him.
this person is only worth pity. he is so broken that you do not need to make anything more, he already destroyed by his past that keeps affecting him.
i would try my best to forgive because day by day we affect each other. even simple word can have much more meaning to unknown being than you planned to mean by it. every action has a price. revenge is gonna be more expensive to you than you know. if you believe in karma, why you believe revenge?
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on March 18, 2012:
I love to believe in Karma myself, trouble is that in many cases so far it has let me down, or at the very least I have no way of knowing if karmic justice actually happened or not. I really need to know for sure that justice has been served personally, so unless I hear that it has, I feel unfulfilled and that something really needs to be done about it.
anonymous on March 18, 2012:
I would never do something life altering to anyone as an act of revenge even if they had done something life altering to me. I'm a firm believer of kharma and they will get back what they deserve 10x fold.
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on March 16, 2012:
I am so sorry to hear about your Brother EssexBoy, that is just a terrible story. I really see why you feel as hurt and angry as you do, (I would feel the same). I really hope the legal system doesn't fail you.
Good Luck
EssexBoy on March 16, 2012:
well my brother was killed by hit and run why on holiday and the person that done it pulled him from underneath the truck and drove off, he was caught but still out awaiting a court date what keeps getting adjourned and they have no remorse! the way we were treated and my brothers body! yet i have the blokes details: house address, number, name etc etc now if he gets away with it people think its right to leave it at that! NO JUSTICE! no ill take everything the man owns, Ill leave him with NOTHING! ill hurt everyone of his family that are in his house at the time and make him watch it an even then it wouldn't be enough to what im feeling now but i will know that he has been punished in a way that inflicts pain what my brother would have gone through!!! sometimes revenge is the right answer......
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on March 04, 2012:
Thanks for commenting Anonymity, depending on what they had done I may or may not agree with you, but thanks for sharing them :)
Anonymity on March 04, 2012:
Well, to be honest I chose Other because the psychological warfare is the way to go. Lets say they humiliate you for the last time; mug you, break your possessions and things like that, It's a worse ending if you can get them to live every second in paranoia, if you can even push it further to insanity; which in recourse might even make them commit suicide. It's much, much more enjoyable than just plain out killing them or slapping their wrists.
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on February 26, 2012:
I think in that situation I would feel the same way as you Paul.
paul on February 26, 2012:
if someone were to murder my wife and child a would make them beg for death and not grant them it till i have caused so much pain to them
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on February 23, 2012:
Thanks Sandra, glad you liked it :)
Sandra on February 23, 2012:
Hello again this article was awsome
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on January 29, 2012:
I can well imagine you are RAGE, I hope he gets what he deserves.
Ravi on January 18, 2012:
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Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on January 14, 2012:
I am so sorry to hear what happened to your cat. I had a cat killed by a dog in Tenerife the same way, and I was devastated. She had four week old kittens at the time too, and had hidden them somewhere away from our home, so I have no idea if they survived or not.
I just hope the dog that did this ended up somewhere where it could not harm other cats or animals, and that its quality of life and its temperament improved. It is so sad all round. I would have wanted some kind of revenge on the owner in your situation, although I could never have poisoned the dog, (I might have stolen it and taken it a very long way away and tied it up outside a rescue centre though, hoping it wasn't microchipped and would be dealt with in an appropriate manner by the rescue centre).
Queenpeasant on January 14, 2012:
Mistyhorizon,
You've certainly given me a lot to think about. I especially "hear" your message because the delivery of your message is so calm, rational and intelligent. I've always been a peaceful individual and I abhor violence. Having read these web pages and given it some thought, I believe my intense dislike of violence out weighs my peaceful nature. In other words, if someone had tortured and murdered one of my pets and gotten away with it and say actually laughed in my face at it, well, I must admit, I would feel driven to make sure this person was encouraged in some effective way to never again harm another living creature. As you have stressed, it is important to be sure the person is actually guilty. Also, I am one of those law-abiding types. Makes it a bit more difficult, but that's just me.
There was a time, years ago, when something similar to my "what if" situation involving a pet actually happened. We had a little cat named Maisie Grace. She was black and white and we'd found her with her two kittens years ago and after spaying/neutering the trio we kept them for YEARS. Early every morning they'd line up in the kitchen for a bit of canned cat food and then all three would step outside on the back patio for some fresh air. One morning a big dog ran out of nowhere into our rather large back yard and before I could do a thing he got Maisie Grace by the neck and shook her and it was over. She died in her yard not 10 feet from the back door. I went for the dog, he dropped her and took off. Soon I found out that the new neighbors had said dog tied up on a 6 foot tether in their back yard. That dog would be out there rain or shine on this short, short leash all day every day. I guess they took him in at night. But sometimes she let him off the leash and everyone in the area began to keep their cats and small dogs inside. I couldn't stop thinking about poor Maisie Grace being murdered right before me, all caused by a woman who had no business owning or even being acquainted with a dog. I spoke to a close friend who is a retired animal doctor, he immediately claimed it was my duty to protect other pets and quite possibly children by getting rid of this dog.
Of course, after the dog killed my cat, I called the local Animal Control. They basically said I couldn't "prove" that dog killed my cat, or that the cat didn't "provoke" the dog. I would have needed to have gotten it on film for a judge to be able to even fine this woman. They did go to my neighbors house and leave some sort of brochure on their front door. I kept calling to report them for violating the law by having the dog chained up like that but nothing ever changed. My retired-vet-neighbor-friend, who had cancer at the time, kept advising me to poison the dog. He offered me a way to put something in some meat and the dog would just go to sleep. Forever. Just like that. I knew I had a serious choice to make. I remember really struggling with this. I'm not a vegetarian, I do eat some meat and I wear leather shoes and all that, but I've never killed an animal. Then, something else happened, another neighborhood cat was found dead in it's own yard. Someone saw a big, black, longish haired dog running around the yard, barking. Apparently the other cat who lived at that residence was up a tree. I went to bed that night feeling like I should have poisoned that dog before he'd gotten another defenseless pet. I still regret it. The dog was a miserable animal, turned mean and with a taste for blood. It really wasn't his fault his owner had made him into a monster, but we simply cannot have monsters running loose to slaughter whomever they please. That poor, despicable beast needed to be put out of his misery. The owner needed to be fined, made to work hard labor at a very large animal shelter with plenty of litter boxes to clean. She needed to be denied the right to ever own a pet again. Most of all, our neighborhood needed to be free of this menace, this leaping, bounding, actually pretty dog, who was made into a killing machine by a very cruel and stupid woman.
The next morning the dog was simply GONE. Not to the pound. No. Not anywhere we could find. She'd simply spirited him away. Possibly to a family member, possibly driven to a country road and turned loose. Since we weren't on speaking terms, I never had the opportunity to ask her. Other neighbors tried and she stonewalled them, I'm told, and spoke of a "better" home in her near future. They had put their house on the market within weeks of the dog's last sighting. Back then houses sold quickly around here, they were gone in a couple of months. I still wish I'd gotten rid of that dog. Then again, I'm also glad he's went away and I didn't have to have a hand in it. Maybe I'm not cut out for revenge. I pray I never have to find out.
Mistyhorizon, I have little experience with web pages and hubs or of "threads" and such, although I've read up a bit and dabbled with a few online games and plenty of Facebook. I'm not particularly savvy with all this technology (still get my books at the library every week), however, I will say I've very much enjoyed your well stated and thought provoking topic, and I appreciate you taking the time to say these things in such a sensible manner. It's rash, brash types that give the very concept of revenge a bad name!
Cindy Lawson (author) from Guernsey (Channel Islands) on January 05, 2012:
Hi Mutagen,
Problem 1, is how many people can realistically go on to be on TV, on adverts or in a movie in order to show their ex how 'well' they are doing? Very few indeed I suspect.
I don't agree Murder is an option that we should consider unless in self defence, but mostly because I think this is too easy for the guilty person, and the original victim ends up being the one who is punished.
Karma is something I want so badly to believe in, yet all too often I see the perpetrators of a crime get away with it and go on to live happy lives without any sign of karma kicking in. Best to make sure it does if you ask me!
I definitely disagree that revenge leaves you 'empty and miserable', in fact quite the opposite, it can give you closure, and a feeling that at least justice has been done, the truth has come out etc. I think the 'trust' was already gone when they did the dirty deed on the victim in the first place, and why would you want to 'forgive' a person who clearly couldn't give a damn about what they had done to you anyway? I think you are very unlikely to end up feeling 'miserable' as a result of getting revenge (I can't think of anyone I know who has said that after getting just revenge on someone who deserved it). We have no problem with 'revenge' when the courts issue it in the form of jail sentences, so what is so different about the private individual arranging it? If revenge is 'evil' then so is the judicial system and so are jail sentences, as there is little difference between revenge and justice in the eyes of a victim of a bad deed or a crime.
I really do urge you to read my other article and the experiences of those in the comments section before drawing such hard and fast conclusions as to the effects of getting revenge, whether it is right or wrong and if it is a good or a bad thing to do. In many cases revenge is a way to take control of our lives back after we have been on the receiving end of some kind of cruelty or abuse. It empowers us and makes us strong again, plus putting in perspective how pathetic the person or people who did this to us in the first place were.
mutagen from under my cat. on January 05, 2012:
mistyhorison2003, yeah, my idea is forlost lovers mainly. but by living well i mean living well enough for those people not only find out but see your success everywhere they go. for example your ex already forgot you but nobody forgets completely if you dated more than a month. so that person now can see you on his favorite tv show, your face is even in front of his window on the advertisement of a new fragrance for example. sooner or later he will understand why that face reminds him something. when he will, his amazement will be huge according to what you were when you left him.