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Do you feel some inferiority complex?

I am a wide reader, I can finish a 400-page novel in one to two sitting, about 2-3 hours only.

How do you feel when your classmates are already successful?

Do you feel that when you browse or scroll a wall posts in Facebook that you've seen your former classmates either in Elementary, High School or even in University are already successful? In my case, I've seen that always. I find myself left behind. And with that I've experience an inferiority complex.

Why?

I'm currently working as a customer service representative of an online shopping site for fashion dress and shoes based on United Kingdom but my rules of engagement is with United States and Canadian customers with a little above average income. I'm a former librarian and as well as a former college instructor in a small college institution nearby.

Although, my salary is enough to feed my family until the next payout will be released. However, no enough savings in my bank is not a good thing to see because of that small bank statement. Every payout of my salary, I've got a chance to deposit a maximum of $10-$15 a month only but when badly needed, I'll take a withdrawal of more than $15. That's gross. In savings, although bank withdrawals is part of the bank transaction but it's not good to see if you have only one deposit in a month and 2-3 withdrawals a month. That's not a good practice.

Going back to my first statement here about the Facebook posts of my former classmates, it seems they're already in their good condition. Some of them almost travelling around the world not because of being a pilot or a flight attendant but as a tourist or having a business in another country but me I can't even go to the nearest country in the Philippines such as Vietnam or even visiting my ancestors in the nearby province. It means they have enough money to do an expense of travelling.

Some of them posting it with building their own business or having a franchise of McDonalds or KFC or Starbucks unlike me even a simple small store I don't have it in which my wife has a dream to have a grocery store. I hope that someday we'll do have our own grocery store no matter how and when as long as my wife's dream will fulfill.

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Some of them been invested already in a big stock market investment here in the Philippine Stock Exchange such as blue chips unlike me I'm only contented with the $1 to $5 cryptocurrency investment (BTC and ETH) every two months. I hope that someday these cryptocurrency that I had will be boom on high in order to invest more.

Some of them posted that they've bought a new car not only one but two or three and I don't know the model but based on the picture it's beautiful and elegant, unlike me been contended of riding a tricycle, jeepney or bus in order to reach my destination. I do have bicycle before as well as electric motorcycle but the bicycle is already been sold to the junkyard and the electric motorcycle is already dump at the back of our apartment because not functioning already due battery issue.

Some of them finished already their PhD while me not able to finish my Master's Degree. Although, I'm done with the academic subjects but not done with the thesis due to financial issues. And another thing, my license as a Librarian is going to expire this coming August 14, 2022 and not going to practice anymore in the field of Librarianship.

I don't know how it feels with this way that I'm seeing those posts from my former classmates. Sometimes, I'm tempted to delete my Facebook account in order not to see their posts. Or sometimes tempted to remove them in my friends list but didn't go through. What if I'll delete them in my friends list and they've found out what I did, how they feel it?

I can't remove them in my friends lists because, transparently, during the time I've got COVID as well as the start of the pandemic, I've beg for help from them and they've help me financially to support my needs. And I truly appreciate their extended help.

In that case, I'm not deleting them in my friends list. I'm dreaming that someday, I'm the one to help them in some way.

Are they lucky and I'm not?

This content reflects the personal opinions of the author. It is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and should not be substituted for impartial fact or advice in legal, political, or personal matters.

© 2022 Luis G Asuncion

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