The Church of Golf.
"The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course." - Billy Graham
"Some of us worship in churches, some in synagogues, and some on the golf course." - Adlai Stevenson
"If you're caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightening, hold up a one iron. Not even God can hit a one-iron." - Lee Trevino
"If I'm on the golf course and lightening starts, I get inside fast. If God wants to play through, I let him." - Bob Hope
"I never pray to God to make a putt. I pray to God to help me react good if I miss a putt." - Chi Chi Rodriguez
"If you call on God to improve the results of a shot while it is still in motion, you are using an 'outside agency' and subject to appropriate penalties under the rules of golf." - Henry Longhurst
"Whenever you hear someone say that he or she can worship God quote, 'just as well playing golf amidst God's nature on Saturday or Sunday as I can in a church or synagogue full of hypocrites,' end quote, then you know you're talking with a 21st-century Deist." - David Holmes
"A famous golfer was invited by the king of Saudi Arabia to play in a golf tournament. They played golf for several days, and enjoyed a good time. As the golfer was about to return home, the king stopped him and said, 'I want to give you a gift for coming all this way and making this time so special. What could I get you?'
'I collect golf clubs,' the golfer said. 'Why don't you give me a golf club?'
He boarded the plane, and on his flight back home, he couldn't help wondering what kind of golf club the king might give him. He imagined that it might be a solid gold putter with his name engraved on it. Or maybe it would be a sand wedge studded with diamonds and jewels. When the golfer got home, he watched the mail every day, to see if his golf club had come yet. Finally, several weeks later, he received a certified letter from the king of Saudi Arabia. The U.S. professional thought that rather strange. Where's my golf club? he wondered. He opened the envelope, and to his surprise, inside he discovered a deed to a five-hundred-acre golf course in America.
Sometimes kings think differently than you and I think. And friend, we serve the King of kings. We serve the Most High God, and His dream for your life is so much bigger and better than you can even imagine." - Joel Osteen
Steve on February 28, 2013:
Cute compilation but the word is "lightning"