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Why Do We Say and Do Things That Don't Make Sense

Why Do We Do and Say Certain Things?

Have you ever wondered why some things are the way they are? Maybe it's something we say on an everyday basis, but if we analyzed it, would realize that it doesn't make sense. Or maybe it's something we do which makes sense at the time, but after we give it some thought, it causes us to wonder why we did it in the first place. In reality sometimes what we say and do is nonsensical nonsense. So, what I am going to attempt to do here, is to bring to light all the crazy things we say and do. Hopefully this will make you scratch your head in wonder and possibly even give you a laugh or two.

Disclaimer

Some of the things I will be sharing do have a meaning behind them. They are just expressions that don't quite make sense if you think about it at first. These sayings and things we do in life that will be mentioned here are not for your personal critique but are rather for your enjoyment.

"Makes No Sense At All"

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Things We Say


Jump in my car... You know the common everyday scenario. Hey I am just gonna jump in my car and meet you in a bit. How many of you actually jump into your car? If you do, that is pretty sweet; I wish you could teach me your ways.


I couldn't care less... This one is probably the most often used saying that does not make sense. For example, I could care less if you ate my sandwich. This implies that you do care to some extreme. The real saying should be I couldn't care less.


Same difference... How can something be the same and different? Is that not an oxymoron?


Selling like hotcakes... Why do we use hotcakes for our metaphor? Why not hot dogs or french fries? Or are hotcakes for some reason, what everyone is buying these days. If so, I am completely out of the loop, which brings me to my next point.


Out of the loop... We know this refers to having little or no knowledge of something, but why do we say loop? Is it some mysterious inner circle we are not in, and if so, why are we are not in it? Is it closed off to certain people if they do not have the magic password?


When it comes down to it... What is this infamous "it" we seem to always be referring to?


It's a dog-eat-dog world. Oh really? Have you seen a dog eat another dog? Maybe so, but I do not think this very common, at least not common enough to use as an expression.


Slept like a baby... Unless you are blessed to have a baby who does not cry, most babies wake up crying in the middle of the night. So it maybe it should be slept like an adult...?


I know that like the back of my hand. How many of us actually sit for hours and study the back of our hand? I know I do not, I have other more important things to do, LIKE CHECK OUT THE LATEST ACTIVITY IN HUBPAGES!


Did the bus come yet? Yeah it did like fifteen minutes ago. I am actually just standing here for no good reason. Of course it didn't come yet!


Stupid idiot... You know this one. This one usually comes out in an argument. For example, "Why did you do that? You are such a stupid idiot!" Oftentimes in arguments, we tend to lose rationality and say things over and over but use different words. It would be like me saying, "I am going to the grocery store supermarket, want to come with me in my car automobile?


New and improved... If something is new, how can it also be improved? For something to be improved, there is an understood implication that the "something" has all ready been existent.



Things We Do On Facebook

I know this gets touched on all the time, but I want to share two things we do and bring the nosensicalness of them to light. (Yes, nonsensicalness is a word)

#1 Why do we post things like "Hey!" on someone's wall? Couldn't we just text them or message them privately? By posting on their wall, it almost seems like you are inviting all of your Facebook friends and theirs to join in on the conversation. Think of doing this in real life at a party. You are minding your own business and having a good ol' time when all of a sudden... Two people in the middle of the room begin to scream out their conversation, basically involuntarily inviting everyone in to hear what they have to say. Wouldn't that be a little odd?


#2 Why do we post statuses about what we are are doing or just got done doing. Now don't me wrong I do this to, but does it really make sense? Do people really care that we are going to Blockbuster to pick up our favorite movie or that we are going to play basketball at the park? How did we ever get through life before Facebook? I mean we didn't have the opportunity to tell our "x" amount of followers that we are going to get our favorite coffee at Starbucks!

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Things We Do In Real Life

Going through great lengths to find the desperately coveted TV remote You know, like checking under the couch, looking in the kitchen, maybe in the bedroom on the dresser. Why can't you just use the button on the television?


Why do we post animal crossing signs on the roads? Is it that animals are very likely to cross at this exact stretch of the road and not several hundred feet beforehand?



Bank Oddities Why is that banks will sometimes leave their vault open, but have their pens chained to the table? Do they really think the customer is going to steal the pen, and even if they did, at least they didn't steal the money. Oh wait they did, because you left the door open!


Store our expensive cars Why do most people leave their Lexus and Mercedes Benz outside in the driveway and their worthless junk inside the garage?


Why do we call the man who invests our money a broker? Isn't using the word broke in a financial sense usually referring to a negative aspect?



Cursive writing? Why did we have to learn cursive writing in school? We don't use it now, right?



Getting mad at the TV remote Why do we press harder on the remote buttons thinking that for some strange reason it will magically work? Did you happen to check to see if the batteries are dead?









Make Up Your Mind!

Make Up Your Mind!

Yes, because those getting eaten are not important at all?

Yes, because those getting eaten are not important at all?

You can bring your pets, you can't bring your pets, which one is it gonna be?

You can bring your pets, you can't bring your pets, which one is it gonna be?

Thanks for the warning!  I just had the most uncontrollable urge to touch the corners of that sign, but the warning in bold print convinced me! WHEW!

Thanks for the warning! I just had the most uncontrollable urge to touch the corners of that sign, but the warning in bold print convinced me! WHEW!

I know it is currently three in the morning, and so I could be losing it, but how can a dead person pay a fine?

I know it is currently three in the morning, and so I could be losing it, but how can a dead person pay a fine?

Could You Make Sense Out of Any of This Nonsense?

I hope you have enjoyed this and have had a few laughs. Unfortunately it is time to get back to work and stop your laughing at this nonsensical nonsense! It is time to do something constructive like reading a book upside down or brushing your teeth with no toothpaste. Or drinking diet soda with fast food, or eating cereal with a fork.

If you have enjoyed this humorous approach to writing, make sure to stop by and visit some of my other works.

Comments

lovedoctor926 on November 07, 2012:

Hey Josh, good to see you writing again.

Diane Minton from Evansville, Indiana on November 07, 2012:

I know why I do it I am bipolar 1 creative genius in writing do say stupid things on a regular basis...mind goes fast thinks deeply even with all Pros can do!! I am thankful for it as it makes life much more interesting! for me and my hubby as well!

stephen on November 07, 2012:

why do we put designs on toilet paper?

shiela on September 09, 2012:

Selling like hotcakes means the goods sell fast because hotcakes must be eaten hot and pronto. Nice read.

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on July 29, 2012:

Rahul,

Thanks buddy, glad you liked it! Sometimes, we say really dumb things!

Jessee R from Gurgaon, India on July 29, 2012:

LOL...

great hub my friend.... some things we say on a daily basis really do not make sense

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on July 28, 2012:

Teresa,

Haha, thanks for sharing and glad you enjoyed it!

Teresa Davis from Moscow, Texas on July 28, 2012:

Josh, are you sure you're not from Texas because we in Texas say and do the very things you mentioned. Ok gotta go and let FB know what I'm doing..rofl

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on July 28, 2012:

Starmom,

Thanks, appreciate the feedback!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on July 28, 2012:

Christy,

Thanks Christy, you are awesome!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on July 28, 2012:

Mary,

Thanks for the awesome feedback! I appreciate your support so much!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on July 28, 2012:

Archer,

Thanks! :) Glad you enjoyed them!

Starmom41 on July 28, 2012:

haha these are good!!!

Christy Birmingham from British Columbia, Canada on July 28, 2012:

LOL this is funny and clever too! I like the part about 'same difference' - I never understood it! I vote up, funny (of course) and sharing too.

Mary Craig from New York on July 28, 2012:

The only complaint I have here is that it took me so long to find this hub!

Funny, ironic and oh so true! This is really a great one.

What about 'eating like a bird' have you ever fed a bird? Do you know how much they actually eat?

We all know there's more but you've done a hilariously good job here and got everyone thinking.

Voted up, funny, and interesting.

Mr Archer from Missouri on July 28, 2012:

I'll be sure to not touch that sign with sharp edges! Those are great? Well done!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on July 28, 2012:

Linda,

Thanks for always giving me a laugh! :)

Linda Bilyeu from Orlando, FL on July 28, 2012:

You made some great points! I say I'm gonna go jump in the shower, I think I might change that phrase now because I never actually jump! Funny stuff! :)

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on July 26, 2012:

GoForTheJuggler,

Thanks, glad you had a good laugh!

Joshua Patrick from Texas on July 26, 2012:

I know I laughed once or twice... voted up!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on July 26, 2012:

dwachira,

Thanks buddy! We say some stupid stuff don't we? LOL

Danson Wachira from Nairobi, Kenya on July 26, 2012:

Several times i have heard use of the phrase "Selling like hotcakes", May be i have used that phrase too. I don't know where it came from, from a baker perhaps? I did enjoy reading this one. Voted up, useful and shared.

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on July 21, 2012:

Docmo,

Thanks so much bud! I enjoyed writing this one! :)

Mohan Kumar from UK on July 21, 2012:

Great fun Josh, it is always delightful to look at the absurdities of language and communication as well as the delicious silliness of humanity. Brought a great deal to smile about, Josh-ster. Thanks.

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on July 21, 2012:

Barber,

Yes it is hilarious to realize that people have done these things before. Lol.

Stacy Harris from Hemet, Ca on July 21, 2012:

I always get a kick out of reading warning labels. After all, you then realize someone has probably been a stupid idiot somewhere for the companies to have to put those warnings on them... For instance.... Did you know it is not advised to dry your hair while showering or bathing.... Go figure! Fun hub.... Thanks for the laugh!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on July 09, 2012:

Thomas,

Thanks for commenting. Yes, we all do stupid things like that. What would life be without funny mistakes like that. :)

ThoughtSandwiches from Reno, Nevada on July 09, 2012:

Josh,

I've found myself walking past the TV to look for the remote in the refrigerator. I do this because I once found my TV remote in the refrigerator. Yeah...weird. I've also told people that my favorite color is yellow when I'm very aware that it is in fact green.

I'm off to the grocery store, supermarket to stare at my hand.

Thomas

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on July 01, 2012:

Thanks so much vellur!

Nithya Venkat from Dubai on July 01, 2012:

Great hub, enjoyed and voted up!!!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 30, 2012:

Yes Nell unfortunately that does count! :( jk lol glad you liked it

Nell Rose from England on June 30, 2012:

Really funny! I love the Touching wires too! there are so many sayings like this, now I am going to watch what I say, and no I don't jump in the car! lol! I have fallen flat on my face in the car though, after a night out, does that count?

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 28, 2012:

Haha good one! Thanks for stopping by and commenting!

Jennifer Vasconcelos from Cyberspace and My Own World on June 28, 2012:

This is so freakin funny. After you die touching the Tram wires and you don't pay your fine - you'll be called a deadbeat (**drumroll please**). Forgive me I couldn't resist.

Thanks Josh.

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 26, 2012:

Why would I do that? I love when you comment! :)

Shauna L Bowling from Central Florida on June 26, 2012:

Thanx for not hitting the "deny" button Fairy Godson!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 26, 2012:

Hahaha, brave that was priceless! I loved every addition you gave me! :) You are too funny, thanks for commenting! I appreciate it!

Shauna L Bowling from Central Florida on June 26, 2012:

Excellent hub, Josh! Our communication is so full of oxymoronic, contradictory phrases.

When you posted the FB segment about carrying on public conversations, I immediately thought of people who insist on talking on their cell phones in public. Who the hell wants to hear their conversation? What is so friggin' important that you can't wait until you're in a private setting? What did these oh-so-important-wannabes do before cell phones? When I'm in the grocery store and I get a phone call, unless it's to remind me to pick up some bread, I tell the caller I'll call back when I'M NOT IN PUBLIC!

And how 'bout turning up the A/C. I still haven't figured that one out. Does that mean make it colder (turning it down)? Or make it warmer (turning it up)?

And shut off the light. Excuse me, but I shut doors (or my ears to idiots who have no sense of what words really mean), I TURN OFF the lights.

Or, at the risk of being banned by the HP police, "I have to take a leak". Really? You don't have one to leave? You need to TAKE someone else's?

One what really gets me, and this I hear from city folk is, "yeah, no". Which is it?????

I could go on and on, but you've got the spotlight here, so I'll leave you with this thought:

No need to look for the remote if you're male. IT'S IN YOUR HAND! You've grown an appendage. Pick a show and get off your lazy ass when you want to change the channel!!

My name's Bravewarrior and I approve this message. I hope you do, too, Josh!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 26, 2012:

Haha, yeah me too! :) Glad you got a good laugh, thanks for stopping by! :)

Denise Handlon from North Carolina on June 26, 2012:

LOL I needed a good laugh! I loved the sign about the animals at the zoo. hahaha.

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 26, 2012:

Thanks very much crazednovelist! I enjoyed writing it, thanks for reading and commenting and voting, and I am glad you had a few laughs!

AE Williams from Atlanta, GA on June 26, 2012:

Oh my, this was the first article I read this morning. I absolutely love it! It's funny and it has a certain panache (yes I said panache). Your obvious sarcasm is entertaining and your content is beyond relatable. I think of many of things throughout my daily life wondering "why did you say it like that?" Also people should say ATM Machine (ATM= Automated Transaction MACHINE) or PIN number (PIN= Personal Identification NUMBER)... why all the extra words? I know what you meant lol. It was awesome read this. Voted up, funny and awesome. Kudos, buddy. :)

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Thanks for reading Vellur, I appreciate the comment and the vote! :)

Nithya Venkat from Dubai on June 25, 2012:

Enjoyed reading. Great hub, funny we do and say so many things without looking at how ridiculous it actually sounds. Awesome. Voted up.

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Thanks for stopping by Suzette! I appreciate it, and I am glad you had a few laughs! Aww, thanks, that means a lot to me! Have a great night! :)

Suzette Walker from Taos, NM on June 25, 2012:

Funny, funny hub josh. Keep up the good work, keep laughing and keep us laughing! I enjoyed reading this - so entertaining. You are becoming quite a "hit" on hubpages.

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Thanks for stopping by, yes I know. But for a lot of people that is not the case. LOL They just keep searching and searching. Hope you enjoyed the hub.

Pintoman on June 25, 2012:

I can't find the buttons on the tv, they are too small and on the side towards a wall where I can't see them. I can push them, but who knows what will happen.

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Haha yeah exactly my point! :) Thanks for stopping by and commenting Julie! :) I have bookmarked both hubs you have recently published and will be stopping by later onto tonight to read and leave comments! :)

Blurter of Indiscretions from Clinton CT on June 25, 2012:

Very funny hub Josh. I loved it! I never got the "selling like hotcakes" thing either? A lot of things sell faster than pancakes, but whatever. Voted funny and up!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Thanks doc, glad you had a few laughs! :) Things we say and do are really funny if we take the time to look at it! LOL Thanks for voting and commenting! :)

lovedoctor926 on June 25, 2012:

"It's a dog eat dog world! Lol.. too funny! I don't use this expression, but I've heard it before. Animal cross signs, a good way to signal pedestrians to slow down, but do people actually pay attention to signs? Many don't even come to a complete stop at a stop sign. You're right! I could care less actually means that you do care. Hey, great minds think alike. Voted up funny including the signs! What? hahhahahaha

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Yes I enjoyed writing this one! :) Thanks for stopping by Christy and for your votes as well! :)

Christy Birmingham from British Columbia, Canada on June 25, 2012:

I vote up and awesome as I love poking at the English language. I also have hubs about words and phrases. You likely found this one fun to write too!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Haha, thanks for stopping by Kelly, glad you had a few laughs! Yes good answer haha LOL :)

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Thanks for stopping by CWB, yes I know some of them have origins. It is just funny because most people are not aware of these origins, so they say things that they have no idea of what they really mean LOL. Thanks for reading and commenting and voting! :)

Kelly Umphenour from St. Louis, MO on June 25, 2012:

Very clever Josh! Great job - it's funny - smart - I laughed. I have an answer! We call the brokers - brokers because they make us broker! See?

Civil War Bob from Glenside, Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Good hub, Josh...voted up, useful, funny, and interesting. Now to answer some of your questions:

"Jump in my car"...literally worked in the 50s/60s for convertibles...was really cool on tv show "Route 66."

"Same difference" works in math class...what's the difference of 5-2 and 6-3?

"It" is related to that "one" of which we're supposed to "have a good one." ;)

Don't know for sure, but I think the "loop" may have been the hangman's noose originally out of which it was good to be!

Remember all those dogs mentioned in the Bible? Yeah...they got hungry for stuff other than Jezebel when she got thrown over the wall and the feeding frenzy extended to their buddies?

The English guy with the Confederates in "Gettysburg" said he "slept like the dead" right before Pickett's charge, then changed it to "baby" when he saw the impending doom of the troops in the trees...might have started the trend.

New one: "Really?" after you explain something...means basically they thing you're lying!

Have a great day and Feel the Fours Young Hubi!! ;)

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Aww, thanks uncle Bill for stopping by and commenting! :) It means a lot to me!

Bill Holland from Olympia, WA on June 25, 2012:

This is so funny! You put a lot of work into this and it shows through clearly. Great imagination you have, nephew, and your comments have me laughing out loud. Yes indeed, you are a force to be reckoned with at HubPages! Great job!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Thanks for stopping by and reading my hub! :) Glad you got a laugh out of it! No he is just my online uncle; no blood connection in real life. He has been a hug support for me, so I just refer to him as my uncle. Thanks for the votes and share Debbie! :)

Deborah Brooks Langford from Brownsville,TX on June 25, 2012:

Josh I did not know you were Bill's Nephew.. You write like he does. excellent.. I love your hub.. made me smile..

voting up and sharing

Debbie

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Haha, Susan thanks for stopping by! Yes that is another great one! :)

Susan Zutautas from Ontario, Canada on June 25, 2012:

This was fun to read. So many things don't make sense. One of my favorites is "Dog Tired" ... I have 2 dogs and they sleep all day. I don't think they're really tired, unless they're tired from sleeping too much :)

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Haha, awesome addition to these nonsensical sayings! :) That is a great one, we say that all the time! Thanks for stopping by, and I am glad it gave you a laugh! :)

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Thanks brenda, yes start that analyzing. We say the weirdest things! :)

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Thanks TT for reading and voting! :)

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

That is a great idea petenali, thanks for the tip! :)

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Thanks Diane, I appreciate you stopping by and commenting!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Thanks for stopping by and voting Gypsy, whatever! :)

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

LOL, Thanks for stopping by snow! :)

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Well, you for sure got that first line M! :)

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Thanks for stopping by, yeah I can see your point about the cursive writing. :)

Ms-Chrysalis from North Carolina on June 25, 2012:

That was hilarious! We have a new manager at work who loves starting a new project, then stops associates who are walking by, and says, " Will you give me a hand?" And of course, once she has recruited enough help, she seems to mysteriously disappear. Well, once Halloween rolled around a coworker was ready for her. Like always, she's in the middle of something. She says, " Oh thank goodness you're here. Can you give me a hand?" My coworker throws a plastic prop hand at her and keeps walking. She was speechless and I fell out laughing! And the fact that he never even looked back made it that much more awesome. As I slow clapped in my head I too walked off. Well played coworker. Well played.

brenda12lynette from Utah on June 25, 2012:

Nice hub! Brought a smile to my morning. I will now the spend the day over analyzing the weird things I am doing :)

Terrye Toombs from Somewhere between Heaven and Hell without a road map. on June 25, 2012:

Great job, Josh. Had me smiling the whole time. And so very true on all your points. Voted up, more and shared. :) Keep up the great work. :)

Pete from Ontario, Canada on June 25, 2012:

Great hub. I actually play the "literal game" at work. I challenge people on the things they say by taking what they have just said literally... It's hilarious to watch people re-think the things they say and understand what they actually said.

Most people open mouth and then engage brain afterwards with oftentimes unwanted results.

Diane Minton from Evansville, Indiana on June 25, 2012:

Way cool my colleague...you have a gift for the hilarious...take care@@@

Gypsy Rose Lee from Daytona Beach, Florida on June 25, 2012:

Voted up and funny. I love this so much. My favorite saying to most things is whatever. Passing this on or whatever.

snowdrops from The Second Star to the Right on June 25, 2012:

you are really one of a kind Josh. You made the hub laugh!

Life Under Construction from Neverland on June 25, 2012:

yeah! wanted to be on the first line. :) hehehe

Heather from Arizona on June 25, 2012:

This is great. I for one am CONSTANTLY correcting people when they say "I could care less." In the same breath, I am a sucker for nice handwriting whether it's print or cursive. I enjoyed learning cursive in school and by default I write in cursive about 95% of the time. I wish people today had better handwriting-- so many people are sloppy writers and then they complain that I can't read what they "tried" to write. This may or may not have any kind of correlation with cursive. Writing cursive might help encourage healthy penmanship habits? I dunno... I haven't researched it. Anyway, anyway, great points!

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Hahahahaa, those are some awesome examples! :) There are so many out there, aren't there? (like why do we say out there? haha :) ) Thanks for stopping by and commenting, I appreciate it! :) Your comment made me LOL :) Thanks for the votes!

Annie Fenn from Australia on June 25, 2012:

Yeah, we say and do some dumb things, hey? My partner, when he is annoyed about something or someone shakes his head and says "I tell you what!". It cracks me up (now there I go, ever seen anyone really cracking up, that's a scary thought!!!), anyway I say to him "What?", and he doesn't know!!! He just says it!!! Great hub Josh, you sure do make a good point. My votes and best wishes (there I go again, just mean wishing you well, you know like good health, etc, I could hardly send my worst wishes!!!) Josh you are a crack up!!!! :) :) :)

Joshua Zerbini (author) from Pennsylvania on June 25, 2012:

Hahahaha, that was fast! I just published this like (looks at watch) 30 seconds ago LOL Thanks for stopping by and commenting :) I don't know how, the ideas just come to me LOL

Thanks for all the votes, I appreciate it M! :)

Life Under Construction from Neverland on June 25, 2012:

YAHHUUUU!!! This is soo hilarious. big LOL!

You really have such unique ideas J, how did you come up such laughable hub? Voted up and all!