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In Tandem With Angst: Moving on With Disappointment

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Disappointment is not a character one wants as a companion or encounter. He can be a pervasive fellow who will not give up until he consumes your mind, spirit and body.

All of us will have countless experiences with him. But how do we get this rather ugly

house guest to leave? We can't avoid him altogether, but we can manage his persistence.



How to manage dawdling disappointment

Disappointment will dawdle if you let him. He is a nightmare tenant who wants to make his lease permanent, and his negative aura will consume you if you tap into it. How do we get over the cynicism this tenant leaves in his wake and move forward with a more optimistic outlook? Nothing can altogether remove the bitter sting of grief and loss, but we can hone healthy coping mechanisms.

Playing Polyanna is not always advisable.

Taking on the role of the most optimistic girl in the world is near impossible. It isn't healthy either; false or toxic positivity isn't a healthy mindset as it hinders bounce back from failure. Balance and cautious optimism are always crucial.

2. Accept your feelings

Don't try to sweep disappointment

under the rug. Let it fester and hurt for a while, as it will take a shorter time to leave you and will be less likely to reappear.

3. You Are Not A Disappointment Yourself.

Remember that you are not a disappointment because of any setback or failure. The tendency to make wrong judgements or decisions is not exclusive; it happens to everyone.

4. DIsappointment happens when you try anything new

Remind yourself that failure and associated feelings will occur when you step out of your comfort zone. Few people achieve perfection on the first try - everything takes time to learn!

5. Focus on the now.

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Don't dwell on the loss, but take the time to ponder over the positives in your life (and there are bound to be more than a few). You'll realise how much you have compared with what you have lost.

6. Talk about it

Discuss the situation with a trusted friend or family member instead of letting it fester. Your friend may be able to bring a clearer perspective on the issue than you

7. Adjust your expectations

Is the letdown hanging over you because you have set the bar too high? You may have to adjust your expectations. Remind yourself that not doing so will hurt relationships between yourself and others.

8. Learn from it.

Disappointment needn't be fruitless; we can at least use the bitter experience by learning something from it. Always ask yourself what you can gain from what seems to be painful and unrewarding angst.



9. Realise that it's alright to wallow in disappointment for a while.

Healing Disappointment wounds is much like doing so for the emotional scars caused by grief. The best way to get over either is to wallow in it temporarily. Once you finish, you will have the headspace to go on with the other activities that

fill up your life.

10. Refocus your energies

Feeling disappointed with a project could mean that it's time to re-strategise and direct your attention to the tasks that bring you fulfilment instead. Doing this will prevent you from mulling over your letdown for too long.

11. Move Forward One Small Step at a Time

Once you've come to terms with your sorrow and learned the life lesson that it has taught you,

It's time to move forward. If doing so seems a little too much do it one small step at a time.

12. Give yourself a high five.

Remember that you are the person who can give yourself constant validation. No one else is as concerned about your esteem but yourself, because you are the only one who knows what is going on in your head and your world.

So take some time to give yourself a high five in the morning. It's impossible to remain upset during a high five. This simple action will keep the wheels of self-worth turning and renew your self-worth.


In Tandem with DIsappointment A Free Verse Poem


Pure angst

She envelopes

She pulls and tugs with all her strength

Dragging your spirit to low depths

Sorrow


Moving

Beyond this pain that chafes and cuts

And the dolour that sours

Move in tandem

With its

song.

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