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Funny Quotes and Sayings Said Wrong

StricktlyDating is an Australian writer who creates pages of original funny quotes and status updates.

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Laugh out loud with this hilarious collection of funny quotes and sayings said the wrong way, mixed up, and said backwards, which gives them new meaning and makes them a lot more funnier than they were ever meant to be! You can also add your favourite funny sayings said wrong in the comments section at the bottom of the page.

  • Correct me if you're wrong.
  • It was nerve wrecking.
  • It was nerve shattering.
  • A blessing in the skies.
  • Over my spit milk.
  • It gives me peach of mind.
  • Do you want a peach of me?
  • Laugh out load.
  • It takes two to tangle.
  • Back in the golden days.
  • You've made your cake, now lie in it.
  • Play it by year.
  • Don’t judge me by my cover.
  • I don’t want to squark about it right now.
  • Cry like it never happened.
  • Cry like there's always tomorrow.
  • Crying like a lady.
  • Don’t single me in.
  • Respect the unexpected.
  • Rain wasn't built in a day.
  • Whole kick and caboodle.
  • My life flashed between my eyes.
  • I'll see it when I believe it.
  • I’ll see it when I see it.
  • Go hard and go home.
  • Go hard and go away.
  • Don't let the bed bugs fight.
  • Don't quit when it's over.
  • Long time, I'll see.
  • You made your bed, now eat it.
  • Don't never give up.
  • Trust a known one.
  • We'll burn that bridge when we come to it.
  • You hit the head on the nail.
  • Bone apple tea.
  • It's music to my years.
  • It is what it was.
  • The path to success is over easy.
  • Barking up the wrong creek.
  • Either you run the day, or you run away.
  • Fool me once, strike me twice.
  • Be who you aren't.
  • I mistook me for a fool.
  • If you can't be you, be someone else.
  • Never lay with those who wait.
  • It's like water over the bridge.
  • Sticks and stones may break my bones but time heels all wounds.
  • There's no place like a house on fire.
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  • I sing on the cake.
  • Don't watch me like I'm a hawk.
  • Don't steal my lightning.
  • You changed right before my ice.
  • That’s what I won’t to do.
  • Lightning strikes when the iron is hot.
  • You have a heart of steel.
  • Get your heart off my sleeve.
  • Don't kick the kettle back.
  • Not the sharpest tool on the block.
  • It's not to be a feared.
  • Some things aren’t meant to beat.
  • Gave them a taste of their own medication.
  • Give them a taste of your own medication.
  • Take your cake and eat it too.
  • You took the cake.
  • You scarred the life out of me.
  • I find you very a peeling.
  • Early to bed, late to shine.
  • If you can't join them, leave them.
  • See you never.
  • There's plenty of chicks in the sea.
  • Been that, done there.
  • It's never too soon to teach an old dog new tricks.
  • There's more than one way to bring a cat.
  • As light as the weather.
  • The early bird gathers no moss.
  • Don't look at me in that tone of voice.
  • It's the pop calling the kettle back.
  • Never give pup.
  • A step in time saves nine.
  • What comes around, comes around.
  • What comes around never comes back.
  • Don't put all your eggs in the one casket.
  • What goes around comes back again.
  • No news is good for you.
  • No news in never no good news.
  • It's harder done than said.
  • It's harder said than read.
  • It's harder never said than done.
  • It's how the turntables turn.
  • Time heals all gains.
  • Time flies when you're feeling fun.
  • Keep your friends clothes.
  • The best is yet to be over.
  • The best is begun.
  • Everything happens for the season.
  • Everything happens for the sea son.
  • Don't give up your dreams, keep sleeping.
  • You mean something to someone on the inside.
  • Better late than not at all.
  • Better late than present.
  • The best things in life aren't free.
  • Don't say what you mean.
  • It's all water under the fridge.
  • It's water off your own back.
  • I'm feeling find.
  • I can't find how I felt.
  • Don't judge a fool by it's cover.
  • Don't judge a book by it's pages.
  • The grass is always better on the other side.
  • If the shoe fits, buy it.
  • It's a peach of cake.
  • All good things come to those who look.
  • It's survival of the fitness.
  • An eye for another eye.
  • A good memory never forgets.
  • A stitch in time saves mind.
  • You can't have your cake and beat it too.
  • In the heat of the present.
  • You can't judge a book by it's clothes.
  • In the light of the night time.
  • Don't understand until you know the whole story.
  • Don't bight the bed bugs.
  • You made your cake now lie in it.
  • For all insects and purposes.
  • For all intents and purchases.
  • For all insensitive purposes.
  • Don't fight the cooks who feed you.
  • It's a walk in the lake.
  • It's not rock science.
  • Been there, been that.
  • Better the devil you don't know.
  • Don't count all your chickens before they cross the road.
  • Don't count your eggs before they're in the basket.
  • Don't take me for granite.
  • Don't just do nothing, stand there!
  • When the turns have tided.
  • Patience of a plate.
  • Only fools rush away.
  • I'm asleep in wolves clothing.
  • I have a photogenic memory.
  • It's like water off your own back.
  • How's your daddy?
  • My body is my pyramid.
  • Once bitten, twice try.
  • It's always safe to be sorry.
  • It's better to try than to say sorry.
  • It's like sunshine on a sunny day.
  • Beauty is in the eye of the tiger.
  • Beauty is in the eye of the boulder.
  • Turn your frown inside out.
  • Shut your mouth while you're talking to me.
  • He's not the sharpest shed.
  • It's like watching paint dying.
  • Don't cry because it's over, smile because it's over.
  • There's so many fish in the broth.
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  • You never know what’s around the wall.
  • Don't trust him as you can throw him.
  • Give him and inch and he'll hit the nail on the head.
  • The grass is always greener when you look on the bright side.
  • Always look on the right side.
  • Always look on the bright side of the road.
  • Nothing changes everything.
  • Act your age not your size.
  • Act your size.
  • You've got another think coming.
  • Like a wolf in cheap clothes.
  • Focus on the negative.
  • Don't sweat on the small things.
  • No rain, no flowers.
  • Treat me with neutral respect.
  • I know the way like the back of my feet.
  • I love you to noon and back.
  • Don't dance around the bush.
  • Like two peed in a pot.
  • The corn before the storm.
  • Isn't it iconic.
  • No point in crying if your milk is spilt.
  • What goes around must come down again.
  • If you can't beat them, stay out of the kitchen.
  • The shoe is greener on the other foot.
  • A leopard can't change it's shots.
  • You win some to some one.
  • You win some you loose.
  • Don't let who you are find you.
  • Don't tell me something I don't already know.
  • Tell me something you don't know.
  • Tell me something I know.
  • Don't bight off more than you bargained for.
  • Hunt or be hundred.
  • I'm ready to fold the towel.
  • I'm folding over the towel.
  • Don't give up, keep crying.
  • Knock on good.
  • Don't touch wood.
  • You mistook my kindness for weak knees.
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  • Open your eyes and listen.
  • I'm on the road to somewhere.
  • Not the brightest tool in the head.
  • Wait until the clouds are clear.
  • Look before you lead.
  • That went under my head.
  • In through the ears and out through the nose.
  • An apple a day doesn't fall far from the tree.
  • A fish in time saves mind.
  • Don't cry over chickens before they've hatched.
  • A rolling eye gathers no moss.
  • Too many cooks don't break a leg.
  • As clean as a thistle.
  • Too many chooks spoil the broth.
  • In one ear and out one other.
  • Don’t give up your day dream.
  • My trust is hurt.
  • My heart got opened.
  • As fat As a fiddle.
  • A rolling stone crosses the road.
  • Don’t blame me for what I did.
  • Like a fish on the water.
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© 2018 StrictlyQuotes

Comments

Audrey Hunt from Idyllwild Ca. on June 20, 2018:

What a fun article. A great way to start my day. We tend to take life too serious. This is a great reminder to set aside time to laugh. Thanks.

Peg Cole from Northeast of Dallas, Texas on April 08, 2018:

Like a deer between the front lights, you've hit a funny bone here.

masky’sWrite from SR Nueva Ecija Philippines on April 06, 2018:

I use that style

StrictlyQuotes (author) from Australia on April 06, 2018:

Thank you all for your lovely comments, I had so much fun creating this page.

FlourishAnyway from USA on April 05, 2018:

My grandmother, who slaughters the English language without mercy, has some of these. I’m almost certain.

John Hansen from Queensland Australia on April 05, 2018:

I have heard a few of these incorrect quotes. Quite funny. Wow, what a list.

DDE on April 05, 2018:

Funny quotes! It has been a while since you have written anything! Hope you are well. I enjoyed reading your hub!

Frank Atanacio from Shelton on April 05, 2018:

this was so good.. savvy don't give up keep crying...remember only fools rush away... Some Ive never heard before awesome!!!!