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Bumbo Recall - Baby Chair Seat is NOT a Baby Sitter

The Bumbo baby chair is under recall! Read on to learn more of this dangerous chair before it gets beneath the bottom of a tot you care about.

No way, Bumbo! We support the recall!

Say NO to the Bumbo baby chair! (Child's likeness is obscured to protect his or her innocence)

Say NO to the Bumbo baby chair! (Child's likeness is obscured to protect his or her innocence)

Baby Safety in mind? Skip this tot seat!

bumbo-baby-chair-seat-is-not-a-baby-sitter

The Hard Scoop on Bumbo Seats

Umbo...

Ubmbo...

Bbumbo...

Vumbo...

Numbo...

Gumbo...

Humbo...

Bmbo..

Bmubo...

However you know it's name, it's a weird word for a weird looking product that's been called the most innovative infant chair on the market. It's won awards, certificates and they'll take your credit card if you want to buy one for your tiny lil bundle of love.

But is it safe?

Can you afford to walk away and leave your baby sitting by his or her self unattended while you watch soap operas and smoke your Virginia Slims?

Can you run gossip with Mrs. Walton next door when you ask for sugar as little Olivia screeches from her pastel purple Bumbo seat back at your house?

Apparently not.

The Bumbo seat is in fact being recalled!

According to the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission, located in Washington DC of all places, the product is dangerous and nearly THIRTY children have been hurt already! There are approximately a million Bumbos lurking in American homes as I write, so this is not a one in a million kind of incident. It is in fact, a thirty in a million incident. Those odds are quite ugly, friends.

Not only is this foam baby chair dangerous, it's also been deemed distasteful by Better Homes & Gardens magazine and the director of the television series Trading Spaces, Walter Perriman. The Bumbo comes in colors including yellow, aqua and LIME GREEN. No child deserves to be visually assaulted with lime green. Something had to be done. The recall lead to huge troubles for Bumbo International, a South African company which, surprisingly, is the manufacturer of the Bumbo baby chair.

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Now this is not news, we know these things. The Bumbo is dangerous, the Bumbo can hurt children and lead to poor taste in color schemes for home décor later in life, but what in in the name of Jehosaphat *is* a Bumbo?

At first I thought perhaps it was a cute little made up cartoon character. Or maybe a roly-poly little beetle. Maybe even some clever ploy to harness the magical charm of Disney's famed Dumbo without paying royalties.

No, dearest readers, Bumbo is something far, far more sinister. It is, in fact, also known by the names of Bombo or Bumboo. Heard of it? No? Well, perhaps you haven't sailed the seven seas with Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom or spent enough time burning villages and stealing gold? Perhaps YOU are not a pirate?

That's right! I have proof that this product is named after a drink. Not just any drink, either. I mean I might be mildly offended by the idea of my son or daughter sitting in a Franzia high chair or a Michelob playpen, but the very concept of Bacardi bassinet is downright insulting!

You know what Bumbo is? Well, allow me to inform you, sweet readers. If you take some water, sugar and nutmeg, mix that together and throw in some RUM, you'll have a Bumbo! Can you believe this insanity? For years the subliminal message to partake of devil's liquor has been infiltrating infant minds. Nevermind rating movies, video games and all that, no we've got to worry about whether the carseat was designed by diabolical marketing geniuses to prod our children into never even getting ON the wagon, much less ever falling off!

It's a shame, but that's what the American public has done to their children. We've entrusted their precious Pampers-padded bottoms to a product inspired by the pirate's choice booze! It tasted better than the British Navy Grog, they said, so they drank themselves sideways in Carribean shantys planning plunders of new ports. This is the same brew George Washington used to get himself elected, you might be interested to learn. Knew there was something sneaky about that wooden-toothed wig-wearer, didn't you?

So take that silly seat right back to Target or Wal-Mart or wherever you found that foam abomination. Or do whatever it is your supposed to do for the recall, but PLEASE for America's future get rid of it! Pirates of the Carribean was bad enough! We don't need these kids in college and having their conversations go like this:

"Ahoy, Aiden! What say ye we blow off class like a strong gail and fetch a pail of BUMBO together!"

"Aye! It'd be a pleasure to drown me sorrows over my Physics 101 finals with ye, Jacob, let's shiver our timbers back to the dorms!"

No, we don't need that sort of future, friends. Stop the madness now, burn a Bumbo today!

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Fine Print

This article and others in my Very True Facts series are intended as humor pieces to amuse you. Please do not assume them to be facts (though I have included some), but if you've gotten a chuckle or two out of it, please DO send it to your friends and family! Also, thanks for taking the time to read my silliness. I've also written an urban fantasy novel you can read for free online by clicking here: Swimming the Streets.

Comments

Utter Amazement on June 16, 2014:

Read Sis's FB comment about this, so came to check it out. Utterly amazed that so many people have so much rage against a total stranger!! Also amazed so many people are STILL clueless. Obviously a classic and Bumbo should be paying royalties for 4 years of free advertising.

Sis on June 16, 2014:

Seriously? SERIOUSLY?? Ignorant folks are still reading this and posting in defense of the Bumbo chair. THIS IS SATIRE. It is not a factual report. What is the point in calling the author names because you disagree with the FAUX FACTS of a humor piece? Wow..

Also...this was written by my little brother...who by the way passed away March 9, 2013. I am sure he is laughing at the fact that this piece is still getting negative comments. He got such a kick out of it when he wrote it and folks argued in favor of the chair.

KENAN on December 30, 2013:

"Bumbo can hurt children and lead to poor taste in color schemes for home décor later in life"

Haha, you cant be serious! I know this article is 4 years old but i couldn't stop myself writing how bullshit it is.

ROBERT on September 29, 2013:

30 in a million, how stupid. lime green is fine may i add!

clorox on September 07, 2013:

As a parent that always stayed with my child at all times, I have to say the chair is awesome and tonight was the first time I ever saw one. The child in it was also being watched and was within arms reach of parents. Now whether you like this comment or not, whether he was joking or not is beyond the point, the biggest point here is I am hugely concerned about the number of children being raised by people that cannot spell. Come on people, maybe take a course or something so you can at least look a little smarter for your kids. Is this a joke, NO it is not, just so you know.

apnits on July 17, 2013:

bamboo in turkish is an abusive word. :p

well you can a buy a bamboo koltuk too. http://www.koltukdukkan.com

Any One on May 02, 2013:

Go to author's profile and make click on "report" and say to the HUBPAGES site administrator what you think about the author and his posts.

Any Name on May 02, 2013:

I was looking for a seat like this for my baby, and found this article. At first I thought it was "real" but after some research, I reached to the conclusion that this was no more than a little part of that 98% of shit that floods the internet. Written with very bad idea for a person who thinks he owns the supreme truth just because he's gay. Sexual tendencies don't make anyone better or more clever than other. I just think that the lack of respect making comments like this makes dull and boring people become popular. Just check any `trending topic`on twitter. The autor or this post will surely be a fan of that useless network. I'll send the URL of this post to that South African company and let's see what they think about uncorroborated information like what is shown here.

Poor sad boy... :-(

gina on February 09, 2013:

To the author of this article, you are a complete idiot. Yes, your title sounds like you are a concerned person who wants to inform the public of a recall. Your entire article is concerned with the visual look of the chair and how it will appear in your home's décor and how abrasive it is to YOUR personal taste. The reason the children got hurt is because the chair was placed on a table, or counter, or other chair. As the chair warning states, do not use it in this way, and don't leave a child alone in it. Next time, mention in your title that this is your opinion, so that I can skip to the true recall articles... and as for colour and shape of the chair, it was designed this way to appeal to a child's eyesight and liking of bright colours. Which most children's toys, etc are .....because it stimulates them...makes them happy and playful......heaven help your children as it sounds like they will have a colourless yet "tasteful" décor

barf on December 06, 2012:

Sorry, Mate but ur post isn't funny.

I know it ment to be but simply isn't.

Regards

Guess who? on October 19, 2012:

At the TOP of the article for the whiners who had an issue with "scrolling allllll the way to the bottom!" (boo hoo) is this:

Explore»Entertainment and Media (34,430)»Humor (3,456)»Satire and Parody (432)

Odd, right? It's amazing how people who can write fairly clearly can be such deluded morons. This has been up for.. 4 years? Yeah, about that, maybe longer. Sorry, but the sheer idiocy of the readership is damned disappointing.

Jane on July 24, 2012:

Americans really seem to have very stupid children if this product is under recall. Maybe one should consider banning breathing for kids too as it is also dangerous, children could inhale fumes or hyperventilate. Or drinking water! Do you know how dangerous drinking water can be? Children could cough it up or the water might not be clean enough! So ban air and water for Children! NOW!

criss on June 11, 2012:

Go f**k yourself!!! Bumbo is an awesome chair. The name is as well ok, i don't see what your problem is? I also think that by the question "Was this hub...?" should also exist the answer "stupid", so we see how many would vote for that! Retard!

sue on June 10, 2012:

Although this pokes fun at the seat it also eduates. Prehaps the woman who wrote the article will come across this. She needs to.

sue on June 10, 2012:

Scarey i just read an article that was stating the pro and cons of the seat. The woman wrote the advantage of the seat is she can ccan put baby on table and clean Kitchen yikes what if baby falls out. also she uses it as a car seat that seems wrong ????

Lyli on April 23, 2012:

Haha, the insane amount of comments prove that you're a great writer :)

JayO on April 07, 2012:

I must admit, I began reading this thinking "oh no" and wondering what danger this seat will pose to the baby I have on the way...

I think the discussion of "subjecting a baby to lime green" clued me in. Hilarious tone and sarcasm, once I realized it. (And you have to get up pretty early in the morning to sneak sarcasm on me, let me tell ya... Or maybe prego brain is just making me slower to react...) I actually want to show this to my middle school English students as an example of both sarcastic humor and propaganda. Kudos.

The comments may be the most amusing part, however. People can be so unnecessarily defensive. Read the article again and you'll see the humor. Or you won't; but senses of humor are like butts--everyone has one, all of ours are different, and you don't have to appreciate everyone else's. Live and let live, folks. This author doesn't find humor in children's injuries; if that's how you read this, just go on elsewhere, because the existing humor will definitely be lost on you.

SHARAN COLEMAN on March 18, 2012:

ALWAYS follow these basic safety guidelines:

Use the Bumbo Seat ONLY on a floor-level surface.

Do NOT use the Bumbo Seat on any elevated surface.

Do NOT use the Bumbo Seat as a car or bath seat or in water.

NEVER leave your baby unattended.

CHAIR IS NOT BEING RECALLED AND EVEN IF 30 KIDS GOT HURT THERE MOTHER/FATHER SHOULD HAVE PAYED BETTER ATTENTION ANY PERSON IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD NOT LEAVE THEIR CHILD UNATTEND!

GET SOME COMMON SENSE PEOPLE!!!!

Hillary on March 11, 2012:

I have not yet bought the seat but I plan on doing so. I think this article is crazy because maybe people should watch their child better and then maybe things like this won't happen. My friends have nothing but good things to say about these seats so this article does not change my mind about buying the seat

Sandra on March 08, 2012:

HAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!! This was hilarious!!!! I use the bumbo everyday. It helped my baby girl learn how to be a support sitter so much faster. She loves it and so do I but I did get a kick out of this! The name is a bit odd and they are kinda ugly but they work. Only an idiot would leave their child alone sitting there while they go about their business and only a bigger idiot would leave their child alone in it on top of a high surface. I came across this because I was researching bumbo recalls because a friend told me they did a recall because it was cutting off circulation to their legs that it was squeezing them(Which is not true for my baby). I'm glad I came across this. good for giggles

Me on March 06, 2012:

Think why peeps got angry and took it serious is coz its so high up on the google search! Second from the top in fact, so u just font expect a 'joke' to b at the top of ur search. Also think peeps got angry when then realised they wasted their time reading it! What the funny thing is, the more peeps read and comment the longer it will stay at the top of google search!! Shit article but ur work here is done evil one ;-)

Angelica on February 23, 2012:

While the way this article was written didn't seem too funny, there were a few funny parts. But, guys, wasn't it obvious that he was just trying to joke around? Its called sarcasm. Maybe satire if he really was trying to provoke change. Anyways, get some rhino skin or something and stop being so sensitive.

Naomi on February 22, 2012:

Anyone who puts teir kid in any chair and walks away or out of the room is too stupid to have a kid. That's crappy lazy parenting. So I don't think the chair is at fault here. My friend has one and she loves it, but she doesn't leave her kid unattended in it. Parents, grow up and take responsibility or quit reproducing..

Mj on February 10, 2012:

Um. He's not bashing the Bumbo. He is making jokes about how ridiculous the recall is. Some parents are irresponsible and put their children in it and then set it on a countertop. That's dumb. You people need to chill and understand this guy is making a joke about how stupid this whole recall is.

I am sure the parents of the injured children would not think this was funny. But I have no sympathy for said parents. They chose to not read warning labels and their own stupidity harmed their innocent babies.

Get a funny bone and have a laugh.

Yes. I am a mother whose 3 month old sits in a Bumbo. On the floor, where it belongs, while I talk and play with him.

q on January 29, 2012:

who's gonna waste time reading fine print when so much has already been wasted reading such a stupid "joke"? wonder if Bumbo could sue you for steering away so many potential customers for no reason whatsoever?

chip on January 29, 2012:

This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever read. Aside from the idiotic comment about color schemes and the assumption that it's named after a drink that nobody has ever heard of... what parent in his or her right mind would ever leave a baby in another room to watch tv and smoke or leave the baby in the house to go talk to a neighbor?? Anyone who thinks that's okay should never have kids. Babies are squirmy, you have to watch them in any kind of seat. They can climb out of cribs, but that doesn't mean cribs should be recalled, it just means that BABIES NEED TO BE WATCHED, NOT NEGLECTED.

Stephanie on January 27, 2012:

Seriously, you sound retarded. You go on and on about how ridiculous it is, but don't have any real facts in your article. You actually complain about the color. Seriously, if you are going to have a blog, maybe take a writing course. First of all, a parent shouldn't be doing any of the things you mentioned if they have an infant in the house. They should be watching their child, not gossiping with the neighbor. If I were you I would take this article down to save yourself from further embarrassment. Or if you have children, maybe watch them instead of posting idiotic stories.

sherikay on January 22, 2012:

Really? Well if you're not a complete moron, you know better than to place your child anywhere elevated in the seat... and like the infant knows anything about mixed drinks!! Im over 30 and I never heard of a drink called bumbo. Seriously? I don't think placing your baby in a seat is going to cause your child to drink... I think bad parenting will though. So obviously, pay attention to your kid and keep them safe by not doing dumb things. Otherwise, the seat is safe, and who cares what its called- your infant doesn't.

EC on January 16, 2012:

The fine print is all the way at the bottom where it's hard to notice. I googled Bumbo chair to see when I can start using this for my son and it popped and and worried me. I understand that this is meant as a joke, but I was worried about my sons health until I read the comment from the "Hub Writer" stating that it was intended as a joke and to check the fine print. Never used this site before just happened to see it on google. Not a fan. Sorry.

laurel on January 05, 2012:

nonsense

Mrstt on January 03, 2012:

We bought one of these for our twins when they were 6 months old but they didn't like to sit in it so we just put it away. Now they are one year old and our girl has developed a new interest in it. She climbs into it without my help and sits in it quietly for ages. However, she would be under my supervision, I would never leave my babies unsupervised in the Bumbo seat, or high chair or any other chair. The color of our seat is lime green to match our sitting room colors which match the colors of the palm trees outside our windows (we live in a tropical place) so I don't

see anything wrong with the choice of colors. And I do agree that many babies get injured on daily basis because of their parents' carelessness, no need to blame a Bumbo seat for it!

This is just a very stupid article in general! The writer must have taken ages to come up with this pile of nonsense.

CS on December 20, 2011:

I DO have kids and my first grandbaby. I thought this article was hilarious once I caught on that it was meant to be. Why? Because all of these items for babies are meant to be a parenting tool, not a substitute for all parenting. I have news for you fussy angry mommies who think making fun of idiocy is offensive (oh and speaking of making fun of idiocy - please learn to spell "petafile" I think petafiles are actually people obsessed with animal right organizations lol)

Any parent who believes their tot is safe on any surface sitting in anything while unattended is going to find all kinds of daft ways to injure their children whether bumbo seats are on the market or not. Dolts.

armando/jasmin on December 17, 2011:

We just baught our lil boy a bumbo seat,its amazing.pleas tell me why a toddler should understand enything to do with alcohol,inless your an alcoholic an offended only cus everytime you see the bumbo its a reminder of your addiction.to end this I say an infant should never be left alone period.

shaina on December 16, 2011:

i think the recall is dumb in general. people who put their kids on a counter or table or any elevated surface in a bumbo are obviously idiots.

Amanda Vega on December 15, 2011:

Just a quick update - the chair has had a recall reminder as of late as the injuries due to the lack of straps has increased to well over 50 injuries to children. If you have a Bumbo chair and would like it replaced for free, Prince Lionheart who is a competitor to Bumbo, has a safer version of the chair (with straps to prevent wiggling out of the chair) is doing a campaign to replace up to 1,000 Bumbos with their bebePOD. If you want more info you can email us at amanda@brilliantbabyproducts.com. Disclaimer: we are Prince Lionheart's PR agency for this promotion.

Stanly on December 14, 2011:

We have one of these for our daughter, she could use it between 4 and 7 months then started to sit on her own. We loved it, but its just like anything on the market. Common sense must be used to prevent any harm to your child. She was never left unattended or on any table or counter. this product really helped her learn to sit on her own.

blah blah on December 14, 2011:

The original mis-speller of pedophile/paedophile actually spelled it "petifle," which is even more hilarious than "petifile," which at least makes phonetic sense.

I now keep a piece of paper by my computer to collect all these "stupidisms" ( I just made that up!);my favourites so far are "pupic" hair and "buttox." Keep up the stupidity people, its very amusing when its not so depressing.

Feisty on December 14, 2011:

This article offends me. This seat with "distasteful " color schemes helped teach my son to sit up alone. I never was stupid enough to leave him alone in it, and never left him in it for long periods of time. I now have a 6month old who is trying to sit alone and i plan to purchase another one of these seats. They are the best thing that has happened for infants. The name tho hideous does not offend nor bother me. In fact the name is silly, and infants don't no their sitting on something named after a drink. Its people like u that make such wonderful things for children go away only to be a distant memory. So, skrew u and the recall and negative outlook on this sea, ive never had issues with this seat. Its the best thing since sliced bread, and i will keep this next bumbo for my grand children an so forth.

doesnt matter on December 14, 2011:

Whom ever wrote this article is a straight idiot and if he or she has kids they need to be taken. My son has never had one accident while using this chair but then again i guess its because i actually watch my kids and im not stupid beyond measure and put my son on the table were he could seriously injured. I love how stupid and ignorant our society has become, but without stupidity and ignorance from other people the intelligent ones would be bored all day hahahahahaha. GOOOOOOO BUMBO

not retarded on December 08, 2011:

Satire. Look it up.

kayla on December 06, 2011:

I loved this product I am fairly certain this helped my daughters back muscles tremendously. She started sitting up on her own before anyone of the other babies her age that I know. And once she started sitting up by herself I took the bumbo away. A product shouldn't be recalled because parents are idiots or because the name is an alcoholic drink, pretty sure that is not where the name came from. Just saying.

Chrissy_SB on December 01, 2011:

OK, I'm pretty sure that the "fine print" stating this was a joke *should* be common sence. And how in the hell does writing a commentary on a childrens product make anyone a pedaphile???? more importantly, the biggest problem with the Bumbo seat is that it's called the "Bumbo baby sitter" and idiot parents everywhere have decided that it's cheaper than paying someone to watch their child or (God forbid) do it themselves. by baby sitter I am pretty sure they meant seat (Just saying). The article itself is not offensive........ the idiots who got offended by the article are offensive... I'm also pretty sure part of the satire was how poorly it was written......... and FYI pleanty of recalled products continue to be sold by retailers........ I LOVED THIS ARTICLE........ and to dear poor undecided parents..... If you seak a baby sitter, pay a person to do it not a chair.... just sayin.

Annoyed on December 01, 2011:

Whether or not this is a joke article or a real one, it is a waste of time and I'm embarrassed that I took the time to read it. And to 'louisem' - I would say you're lazy...you can't even make the effort for punctuation!! Geezo.

louisem on November 28, 2011:

I actually love this product its not that im a lazy parent but when im in the shower with bub I put her down in it so I can have a wash myself and at school I put her in it so I can actually get work done for once and on the bus she wont stay still in her pram she always wants to sit up that's were the bumbo comes in handy couldn't live without it great product and I do not care about the name my child isn't going to know what it means I couldn't care less for the meaning of the name. And you would not leave your child in the bumbo when there not within your view not unless your stupid enough to do so you would have to be an idiot to leave your child alone in any toy or seat.

Beverley on November 25, 2011:

There are few truly dangerous baby products - including the bumbo and baby walkers. There are only careless and inattentive parents.

NotImpressed on November 21, 2011:

Here's the statement from consumer reports... "If the seat is placed on a table, countertop, chair, or other elevated surface, young children can arch their backs, flip out of the Bumbo seat, and fall onto the floor, posing a risk of serious head injuries."