Keep moving, no one knows if it is the right direction and is doesn't matter. You can always reroute.
JUST DO SOMETHING
I love the idea of the individual person being who they want and no one judging them for that. Then again of course this is the human nature of the universe and everyone tends to be who they THINK everyone around them wants them to be.
I find myself just starting these articles on this website and then not wanting to even post them, I come up with some stupid idea like it isn't good enough or whatever. I always feel like I could be better than I am. It is good to strive to be better, but never starting to begin with I feel like is worse. It could be worse to not even try. So I try. I bring this up to keep going and keep trying. Maybe I don't make sense or people don't understand... It's not like I am that far out there.
I am just a person, in a world... That is trying to be something. Anything. I feel like I need to be something special, but I honestly cannot say with complete confidence if I am or not. Special that is. Whatever that means, in that aspect. Exceptional. Different. Particular. Memorable... To list a few synonymous. To think everyone is rare is a little bit of an overwhelming thought. That is not reality, it simply cannot be. If everyone was significant then on one would be.
How can everyone be something and any one person stick out for what they are? They wouldn't. Maybe I am just finding an excuse to type in this fashion, as I often do. I think that no one reads my articles and then I write new stuff like no one has read the old stuff. That is human nature I think, to have such low self esteem that no one could possibly care. But I am sure that more have noticed me then I ever imagine. So I am just going to write from the heart. Who... Really... Cares? I work in a place where I feel like people are constantly watching me, cameras everywhere and constantly being judged for every step I take. I have gotten used to that. I live everyday as if I am being watched. It really changes the demeanor of a person. By a person I mean me. I have really changed the way I live my life because to be vary frank... You never really know who is watching you.
I keep throwing out this who cares attitude, but that I am sure is getting old real quick. I know that there are billions of people in the world and one will relate to what I am saying. But I don't really need anyone to relate to me. I am doing this for myself. As most people should do. Do things for yourself.
Moving on... I am currently sitting in a cheap desk chair I got from Walmart, or maybe it was amazon. Either way I love it and I am surprised that is hasn't fallen apart at this point. I sit in this chair a lot. Comfortable chairs are important to me. Where I work I am never able to find a chair that satisfies me quiet like this one. That is a good thing considering this is where I live and so the best chair will be for me.
I keep getting excited the longer I type these words. Maybe I am meant to be a writer, maybe not. That reminds me of this movie I watched the other day called, "Incident in a ghost town," The main character in that movie aspires to be a famous writer. Of course a lot of people desire that, but vary few achieve it. I desire to constantly. I know that there are fans that read what I put time into creating... of course there are people out there who relate to me.
Sometimes I find myself starting into space and just zoning out. I guess that is normal, then again who cares what is normal.
Creativity is weird because sometimes I comes to me and other times it does not. Id like to think the time and energy put into something will be worth it in the end.
I don't write for anyone but myself. I used to make videos for myself and now I am just forcing myself to put an effort and DO SOMETHING. Sometimes you just have to do something. Walk around, move things. Just take in the process of doing things. It doesn't matter what it is, I feel like doing SOMETHING is better than doing nothing at all. So go do something. Say something, make something or create. Because saying nothing will never go fart, but doing at least something will be good or bad but it would be better than nothing.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2021 Virginia