If you’re empathic or highly sensitive, it’s almost second nature to put others needs before yourself or take on the problems of the world. But what about your happiness? This is why setting clear and strong boundaries with others are crucial so you can be happy, healthy, and in control of you. Below are the best books to help you create powerful boundaries. Because many empaths become victims of abusers, a few books that teach about setting boundaries with energy vampires or toxic people have also been included.
Energy Healing for Empaths: How to Protect Yourself from Energy Vampires, Honor Your Boundaries, and Build Healthier Relationships
Author: Lisa Campion
Average Goodreads rating:4.31/5
Lisa Campion, a psychic counsellor, offers energy management skills to her fellow empaths in this useful book. According to Campion, empaths are prone to absorbing other people's emotional energy, which might lead to unexpected problems. She emphasizes the dangers of sympathetic overload and encourages readers to stop feeling victimized by their sensitivity and instead take control of their energy and boundaries. The tools Campion teaches, such as a "system check" scan to distinguish one's emotions from others' and strategies to build personal boundaries through visualization and meditation, are the book's strength. She also discusses the nature of "energy vampires" (those who drain one's energy) and suggests ways to break free from them, such as setting boundaries and seeking support if saying "no" is difficult.
Campion's message becomes a little muddled when she delves into concepts like ancient and new souls, soulmates, and ‘’energetics of sexual energy’’. However, anyone who believes themselves to be an empath will find this book useful because of Campion's breezy, accessible manner and clearly described methods to preserve your energy and build boundaries.
I Don't Want To Be An Empath Anymore: How To Reclaim Your Power Over Emotional Overwhelm, Build Better Boundaries, And Create A Life Of Grace And Ease
Author: Ora North
Ave. Goodreads ratings: 3.97/5
when an Empath is unaware of shadow parts of their self, it leads to significant imbalances in their life, major pain, dramas with Narcissistic and drug-addicted people, drug addiction, serious medical disorders, extreme sadness and anxiety, and even suicidality. Ora gently guides you through the process of facing your shadow self in the mirror. While facing your shadow self is never an easy task, it's vital to do so to achieve balance and remain grounded in the face of life's difficulties. For example, Ora refers to "lightwashing" as a way to avoid addressing your problems by continually "living in the light." In yoga and spiritual circles, it's common to hear about the importance of always being positive and content, and that the other people's treatment of you is a reflection of you. Ora informs us that these are misleading concepts and many people in real life often behave selfishly. Thus, it's fine to be broken, irritated, furious, and resentful because you're human after all. A part of being "human" is acknowledging and working through these darker feelings so that you can move on and live well. After working through the chapters in I Don't Want To Be An Empath Anymore, you'll be urged to do the inner work. There are recommendations at the end of each chapter for journal entries, meditations, or other things for putting the lessons you've learned into action. This is a really good book. It is very encouraging and compassionate since it prompted me to face my fears and work through issues that I have long been avoiding.
This book will help you reduce your emotional overwhelm as you allow yourself to feel your emotions and not be guilty about them. You will learn how to express your feelings so that others may understand when and why you are unhappy. In addition, you will learn to create healthy boundaries so that you don't keep others away, but protect your feelings. This book is a great resource to aid you in your journey as an empath in this harsh world.
The Empowered Empath: A Simple Guide on Setting Boundaries, Controlling Your Emotions, and Making Life Easier
Author: Judy Dyer
Average Goodreads rating:4.0/5
The Empowered Empath will show you in a clear and easy-to-follow manner, how to realize your potential and what you are supposed to do with your precious life. This guidebook can teach an inexperienced Empath to transition from a state of misery and dissatisfaction to one of comfort and freedom in their own skin. You will learn, how to become an assertive empath; protect your energy and set boundaries with others. You will also learn how to make the right professional decisions and mange overwhelming emotions.
Whatever your goals as an empath are, you'll be able to reach them after you understand how to use this powerful guide to help you improve your abilities.
Emotional Abuse: A manual for self-defense
Author: Zak Mucha
Average Goodreads rating:4.27/5
Emotional Abuse: A manual for self-defense examines the phenomenon of emotional abuse and how we are socialized to minimize, justify, and dismiss aggressive behavior. The camouflage of emotional abuse leads us to feel we deserve the abuse or somehow are “too sensitive.” We deny our pain to protect the relationship; by denying out pain we lose our own boundaries. Acknowledging our pain allows us to begin defending ourselves.
I really like this book. This is one of the most brilliant books I have ever read.“While Zak Mucha’s explanation of the harms of emotional abuse is useful, it pales in comparison to his wisdom in teaching us emotional self-defense. Learning to protect ourselves from emotional abuse changes everything.
Whose Life is It Anyway?: When to Stop Taking Care of Their Feelings & Start Taking Care of Your Own
Author: Nina W. Brown
Average Goodreads rating:3.88/5
Nina Brown, a therapist and author, teaches readers how NOT to get overly- involved in the emotional needs of their loved ones and instead begin to focus on their own. Is your mother's wish to vent about your father's carelessness last night more important than your need to get to work on time? Do you really have nothing better to do on a Saturday night than drive your younger brother home from the movies or assist your sister with her romantic relationship? If you find yourself dropping everything in your life whenever a family member needs you, you're among the millions of people who are overly invested in their families.
Overly-involved family members often lose sight of who they are and what they actually desire as a result of their loved ones' problems. Excessive empathy becomes an issue when other people's needs dictate your every decision, inhibiting your ability to take care of yourself and move on with your life.
Whose Life Is It Anyway? The author Nina Brown starts by helping readers evaluate their own family ties and decide if they are too caught up in other's needs. She then goes on to teach readers a number of ways to help them shield themselves from other people's needs, establish powerful emotional boundaries, reinforce parts of their personality against a predisposition toward excessive empathy, and avoid domineering or manipulative relationships.
Boundaries after Pathological Relationship
Author: Adelyn Birch
Average Goodreads rating:4/5
“This is me, and everything else is not me,” This is how a non-empathic person thinks and their sense of boundaries is innate. Empaths, on the other hand, don't have a built-in boundary; instead, we have finely-tuned antennae that are constantly sensing the wants, pains, and desires of others. As a result, we must learn to set boundaries. Boundaries after a pathological relationship goes into detail about how to set boundaries so whether you are a survivor of abuse or want to avoid a toxic relationship as we are magnets for vampires, this book can help.
When you create boundaries, you communicate your worth to others in a true and practical way. It also has a healthy effect on your health because you are not drained of energy or tired all the time. This brief but powerful book is jam-packed with sound guidance and useful hints. It will guide you through the full process of establishing boundaries, from start to finish.
Boundaries: Where You End And I Begin: How To Recognize And Set Healthy Boundaries
Author: Anne Katherine
Average Goodreads rating:4/5
Boundaries: Where you end and I begin by Anne Katherine, is one of the most interesting and wise books on boundaries that I have ever read. For one thing, I appreciate her definition of a boundary: a limit that promotes integrity. I love that.
This book was published in 1991 but it as relevant today as it was in 1991. I have recently read it. It's full of heartbreaking life experiences, especially if you've ever suffered abuse or lack of boundaries. Through its pages, you'll be able to view yourself. I certainly did!
Under the umbrella of boundaries, Katherine tackles subjects as diverse as overbearing parents, sexual abuse, family dynamics of all kinds, intimacy, the marriage relationship, friendships, peers and work stuff etc.
Every chapter also includes exercises, which are typically basic but not easy. “If someone you don’t trust stands too close to you, move to a distance that feels safer.”. I know, it appears simple enough but in practice it is not.I have some experience with this.Setting boundaries has been the hardest – but also the most rewarding – of all the things I've learnt to do for myself.
This is a book that can assist any empath who has ever felt violated in a relationship or an interaction with others and has no idea why. You will learn what healthy boundaries are, how to recognize if your personal boundaries are being violated, and what you can do to protect yourself.
Psychopath Free: Recovering from Emotionally Abusive Relationships With Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Other Toxic People
Author: Jackson MacKenzie
Average goodreads rating:4.20/5
Have you ever been in a relationship with a psychopath or malignant narcissist?
The chances are that you have been, or you currently are in a toxic relationship. Because abusers especially look for empaths to exploit.
In Psychopath free, Jackson Mackenzie goes into great detail about character traits of both abusers and victims. He explains abuse cycle in detail and teaches you 30 ways to spot a toxic person before it is too late.
However, the best part of the book is when the author teaches you what kind of people you should avoid and how you can establish boundaries and protect yourself from abusers.
Written specifically for victims of abuse, but if you identify yourself as an empath you should read this book as the knowledge might help you in future. I wish I had read this book years ago, before my encounter with a malignant narcissist.
Coping with Infuriating, Mean, Critical People
Author: Nina W. Brown
Average Goodreads rating: 3.63/5
In Coping with Infuriating, Mean, Critical People, Nina Brown explains why many people who don't exhibit all of the characteristics required for a formal, full-blown narcissist diagnosis still exhibit a destructive narcissistic pattern (DNP) that causes much of the same anguish for those with whom the individual interacts. She discusses in detail the character traits of a destructive narcissist. The second half of the book includes practical tools and techniques about dealing with a narcissistic coworker, supervisor or boss, parent, or intimate partner.
One of the most remarkable features of the book is how the author teaches you to set powerful boundaries to protect your emotional well-being.My personal favorite is the "walling off" strategy. It's a type of emotional insulation technique that protects you from other people's projections. Brown advises preparing yourself mentally before dealing with a destructive narcissist. To accomplish this you should visualize the image of high steel doors in a wall sealing you off from the projections of toxic person. (You may also draw down a shade.Use whatever works for you). The concept is that you're aware that this individual has strong projective identifications that might make you feel ashamed, and you're consciously attempting to block them out of your life. The steel doors will not only shut off the toxic projections but also reflect them back to the narcissist
You will be better able to withstand conversations with a narcissist now that you have instituted that symbolic walling off, and you will not leave feeling ashamed, in turmoil, or wondering why I feel the way I do. While you may not enjoy being walled off, it will help you retain your equilibrium.
Emotional Blackmail: When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation, and Guilt to Manipulate You
Author: Susan Forward
Average Goodreads rating:4.1/5
Emotional blackmail by Susan Forward is a thought provoking, eye opening and interesting read. She uses real-life examples to assist the reader understand emotional blackmail."If you don't give me what I want, you will suffer," is the message underlying emotional blackmail. When friends, family, lovers, bosses, and coworkers use fear, obligation, and guilt to force you to do what THEY want, you may utilize the tactics, skills, and scripts in this book to respond positively and stand firm. The author offers step-by-step instructions for repairing relationships and regaining confidence, independence, and self-esteem. This book aids in dispelling the "FOG" that emotional blackmailers use to blind us. Fear, Obligation, and Guilt make up this "FOG." It equips the reader with the knowledge and skills necessary to detect emotional blackmail and to set effective limits against it. This book can assist any empath in shifting the power dynamic in your interactions with emotional blackmailers. Dr. Forward provides you with the knowledge you need to end the blackmail cycle once and for all.