Social anxiety disorder or simply social phobia snatches away your personal and career opportunities and keeps you lagging behind in this competitive world.
I have seen opportunities knock at the door of socially skilled ones, though so many others have the same academic and technical skills.
I accept that mingling with other people is not everyone's cup of tea.
Introverts do not like to participate in social gatherings. Even if they do, physical symptoms like nausea, increased heart beat, short breathe make them feel uneasy.
But no need to worry.
There are some techniques which can make you overcome your social anxiety. Only one thing you needed is the commitment to practice them.
1. Get motivated why you need to overcome your social anxiety:
Unless you understand why you need to overcome your social anxiety, you don't get motivated.
- Social skills brings you more opportunities than you imagine.
- Being social makes you feel more confident.
- Team work has become an inevitable part of our career.
- Psychologically speaking, socially skilled ones emit their emotions through their conversations directly or indirectly and lets stress out of their mind.
Getting motivated is the most important task in overcoming social anxiety. It constitutes 90% of our goal. other 10% includes tips , techniques and strategies to get those social skills.
So, the first thing you get motivated.
2. Never skip any occasion:
When you have social anxiety your mind finds innovative reasons to turn down and escape every social gathering opportunity. Instead of trying to boost your confidence to attend those you quickly find lame excuses to skip,
So, now take a firm decision. You are not going to deviate from this decision. If you deviate from this you are going to compensate by participating in more social occasions.
Take this into your mind, NOW....
" I will participate in each and every social gathering that comes to me. No matter what happens, I won't skip any. if i skip any I will compensate it by attending more."
3. Your friends are your teachers:
Observe people who are known as socially skilled, and learn from them. Their facial expressions, body language, phrases they use, how they respond to different situations etc.
There are some things that are not available in books. they need to be learnt by "watch and adapt' method only.
You don't need to reveal anyone about your observations. Just tell yourself. As infants imitate their parents, you too follow ....select, copy, adapt.
Read social etiquette books:
A great number of books are available in the market. So, go through them and practice them.
Knowing social etiquette is essential because one little mistake may make you embarrassed and keeps you in your own turtle shell, socially alienated.
some of the best books of social etiquette are
1.Emily Post's Etiquette
2. Exceptional advice for the extremely modern lady by Derek Blasberg.
4. Don't be a backbench guy:
These little tips will certainly help you in overcoming social anxiety.
Try to utilize every opportunity to participate in activities, like
- Public speaking
- essay writing
- playing games and sports that involve teams.
- Volunteering for any purpose or organisation.
- Start little talk with strangers (not necessarily on the road, but in familiar places).
- Don't be a back bench guy. it is very, very comfortable to sit in the back seats but trust me you need to avoid them, if you want to improve social skills.
5. Take care of your physical appearance:
Your physical appearance certainly influences your confidence levels.
When you are not satisfied with your appearance, you try to keep away from others. You feel uneasy. You identify that you are feeling uncomfortable, and wait for opportunity to leave that place.
What to do?
Take care of your
- Har style
- clean shave
- body language
6. Find what people are interested in:
Starting conversation with others is very easy than you imagine.
Just follow a simple rule.
"find what people are interested in and ask questions"
This is a very old communication skill and there is nothing new in it.
people have a habit of speaking more about their passionate topics.
The advantage you have here is, you don't need to speak anything, just keep on asking questions one after another.
7. Deep breathe:
How hard you may try, still you may have these kind of symptoms in social situation,
- Shortness of breathe
- Panic attacks
to overcome these you need to acquaint and practice relaxations techniques.
Out of those all relaxation techniques, the simple yet powerful technique is
"Take a deep breathe"
Don't believe me?...do it and find the results.
8. Other relaxation techniques:
Practicing Relaxation techniques will certainly have a long term positive influence on you.
- Mindfulness for stress relief
- Progressive muscle relaxation
- Guided imagery
Choose any of these techniques and make them a long term habit to reap extraordinary results from them.
9. Consult a psychiatrist:
Some times by following the above strategies, you may not be able to overcome your social anxiety. The reason, you might be suffering from GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder) or depression or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder which require medication.
Medication makes your anxiety reduced in a short span of time.
10. Positive Affirmations:
keep telling yourself these kind of positive affirmations. By telling yourself continuously, they enter into your subconscious mind and stay there.
This is a wonderful technique that brings miraculous results.
- "Every breath I inhale calms me and every breath I exhale takes away tension."
- "I love meeting new people"
- "I enjoy being in a crowd"
- "I meet new people easily"
- "I am comfortable around other people."
Alok Vats on August 21, 2014:
Very good blog on ten tips to overcome social anxiety. I guess positive affirmations are the best way to come out of it. If you are facing such issue then I am sure it will work....
Barbara Badder from USA on July 21, 2014:
Thanks for all the good suggestions. My family tends to be shy and some of these techniques should work.
Chitrangada Sharan from New Delhi, India on July 21, 2014:
Very nice and well done hub!
You have given some practical tips and suggestions to overcome social anxiety.
Voted up and thanks for sharing!
Thanks for the follow and welcome to HubPages!
Bill Tollefson from Southwest Florida on July 20, 2014:
Really enjoyed this HUB. I work with many who have Social anxiety disorder and this will be a good reference and normalizing source.
Good job. Keep writing to enlightening others.
Dr Bill Tollefson