Val enjoys turning his thoughts into a form of an article or a rhyme, while not necessarily keeping in mind reader's possible taste.
Losers live in the past. Winners learn from the past and enjoy working in the present toward the future.
-- Thomas Waitley
I am about to talk here about losers. Not in a mocking, degrading sense, because if we had never lost in life, we wouldn't have found out how winning made it feel so different.
But well, there are losers, and then, there are losers, and I mean those who managed to make it a habit to somehow sabotage their chances of winning, while coming up with all kinds of excuses.
So this post is about those excuses.
Hey, some even sound legit, as if jumping out from those shrink's textbooks. But I am not a shrink, so I can be forgiven for giving them a less compassionate interpretation. I am already planning to make a rhyme at the end of this text -- while not being a poet by my literary ego's self-assessment.
Thus, just try to find this topic as entertaining as it's intended to be. You know, humor hasn't spared even those handicapped, dead, mourning, depressed -- so losers can't be offended for having their turn.
I might as well start with those poor devils with neurotic traits who just can't stop dragging that heavy emotional tail from their childhood, which makes them bump into realities of relationships, whether romantic, professional, well. even their dog may not be showing enough understanding.
So. whoever is willing to listen -- just kidding -- people always pretend being willing to listen, there goes their story of life crowned with an excuse for not making something more impressive of their life.
It never stops amazing me how such folks can't see that adulthood makes them free from childhood's limited ability to assess life -- with a responsibility that maturity is suggesting to outgrow those limitations, along with that toilet training which they found so easy to master and leave it there in the past.
While every loser can be spotted by presenting themselves as a "victim" of this or that circumstance, this type sees themselves as a victim of a treatment they received from their primary caregivers, usually parents.
After having to slay some of my own inner dragons following some crappy details of my childhood -- but finding it quite easy to do -- I find it hard to understand why grownups feel so emotionally trapped in their past.
Even more so, after seeing them otherwise taking care of most of other challenges in an adult fashion.
Indeed, when you think of it, we got that umbilical cord severed at birth, freeing us from mother's womb, and then we absorbed some non-supporting crap -- but then for the rest of our days we choose to keep an emotional umbilical cord with our parents, putting a weight on what they said, apparently unable to shake it off.
I've seen people disagreeing with their parents in a discussion -- but then they are still agreeing with what they heard from them as a kid which was not true -- but just hurting.
I heard my parents say with a pitiful face that I would be a disaster when I would start my school. Then I turned a straight-A student, 4 years a chairman of my class, and 2 years a chairman of the whole student body in the entire school.
I heard them say how scared I was of my own shadow -- and I turned out a drill sergeant in the army.
I heard them say to neighbors how I was terribly scared of strangers and strange places -- and then I emigrated, not once but twice.
Parents are sometimes simply damn wrong. We may not have hurt feelings of our own kinds the same cruel way, but must have done it some other way, unintentionally.
It's this thing with being a parent -- and it's simply odd that we have to hold the grudge and stay hurt, using that for an excuse for not doing the best of our lives we can.
Self-discipline is what separates the winners from the losers.
-- Thomas Peterffy
"It's Man's World"
Sorry ladies, but I have seen more male suckers in my relatively long life than I would care to remember.
It's even animalistic, as it brings up the scene of two idiotic rams butting heads while the female is standing on the side and watching -- possibly thinking: "Why are they fighting? Once that I am ready to mate, any of these idiots would do".
Some comedic historian said: "If Cleopatra had a little longer nose, history of Rome could have turned out different".
Or, how about that one: "There is a woman behind every successful man".
Which makes me think that the slogan from the above title -- "It's man's world" -- could have originated and believed by a bunch of women who were not "equipped", whether physically of mentally to make a sucker out of a man.
Hey, wars were started to impress a woman...empires were built to impress a woman...there would have never been an invention of poetry if it was not for this more beautiful gender.
Then, just look at all those "women with balls", executives at high places, even those female wrestlers and boxers kicking ass and making those male spectators salivate.
There is also that saying: "Man is woman's first child." You see, I know all these important maxims which are to disprove the one used by some women as an excuse for not getting ahead as anything beyond being a housewife.
Come on, ladies, forget ambitions, get a hobby and let your sucker provide for you, as it was historically predetermined, all the way back from Flintstone going hunting, and Wilma cooking the dinosaur ribs.
Failures are expected by losers, ignored by winners.
-- Joe Gibbs
When It's All Fault of Those "Up There"
I have personally had a displeasure of meeting a number of those losers whose excuse for not doing any better in life was "bad economy...bad government...tough times for a little guy".
They make for a typical union leader, a social activist, or just a run of the mill pissed citizen. Since I spent many of my working years in industry and manufacture, I can say a thing or two about those rebellious losers.
I never got in any conflicts with managements. That made some of the union hot heads look at me as an "ass-kisser". All until I nicely explained to them how I was coming to work just to do my job for which I got paid, and then go home to my family -- with no interests whatsoever in any "injustices", any "right-wrong" games at the work place.
I remember telling them how the company didn't have enough money to pay for my nerves, only for my work.
But they didn't seem convinced.
Just like all those losers to whom I said how I was not into supporting any political parties simply because my voice didn't make any difference. I was just one whose vote they wanted, and after they got in power I didn't exist anymore -- it was all about their career from that point on.
The losers couldn't get it, in a need to blame someone for their own not taking responsibility for their lives.
Well now, there are many other types of losers that would require a much bigger writing space for all to be covered -- but let's just stay with these three, and in addition, here is the rhyme that I composed on this topic. I hope you are going to like it, simple as it is.
He is not a loser who makes a mistake
but who keeps repeating it over and over
at times we just don't get a deserved break
nothing to do with not finding a four-leaf clover.
Our losing is always someone else's doing
even our gods are seemingly not on our side
on some too big bites we may still be chewing
and many are not done with being taken for a ride.
Without having lost, no one can turn wise
learning from mistakes, but not to graduate
for that kind of wisdom we rarely win a prize
because only doing it right is what looks great.
Life is one big challenge, one big test
it's all ups and downs making it complete
and although we may try hard to do our best
some outcomes turn bitter, others end up sweet.
Losers may be those folks who oftentimes dare
but more are among those who won't even try
those are the ones that are easy to scare
left with excuses, each based on a lie.
© 2022 Val Karas