Skip to main content

Exploiting Unknown Secrets That Will Easily Make You Successful

Always associate yourself with people who are better than you- Warren Buffett


You are who you associate with - Tim Ferris

Have you ever had things happen to you that you never thought would- That has happened to me many times where I have often found myself in a situation I have occasionally seen others or heard others go through but never expected to experience myself. And I always question what I did to attract it.

This has been the case for years. I am a person who likes to get to the root of the problem so that I deal with it once and for all. I am always careful of what I think because I am aware of the power of thoughts, but recently I leant of another force I had never really considered nor ever thought harmful, and that is the force or power of association.


. Associate with those who help you believe in yourself. - Author: Brooks Robinson

You would never think anything would rub on you just by listening while someone tells you their life story or their sad relationship. It's not that I look for people who like to pour out their hearts in my ears, but at times people just like to unburden themselves on someone.

Some six years back a friend of mine started having problems in a marriage of fifteen years standing. There were days he wouldn't come home, at first, and then latter the husband left her for another woman. Naturally I felt for my friend, I sympathized, empathized with her, left with three children to fend for, jobless. It sounded the right thing to do and normal.

I am sure many people put themselves in a person’s shoes and really feel for them, and that’s what I did. It is not always easy not to take sides, besides regardless of what was really happening in their relationship there is no justification for a father abandoning his children. That’s how I reasoned, and in this case my feelings, reasoning or conclusion wasn’t really unfounded.

Though what I now realize is that no matter what does happen between those in a relationship my part of it is never to get involved. It is the reasonable think to do but not when you attract the same kind of sprit in your own relationships. I learnt the hard way.

Your friends and the people you associate with are reflections of you- Amanda Ray

What I now know is that you attract through what you associate yourself with, since everything around is energy and energy has a way of rubbing off on you just by being in the environment where negative things take place. My friend finally adjusted to looking after the children on her own and starting from scratch, but it wasn’t an easy journey for her.

I didn’t have a husband walk out on me nor abandon me, but some two years after my friend’s husband left I met a man I thought was my soulmate. He sounded and looked like the man after my own dreams. I understood him and we laughed a lot together, we got along fine and liked to joke a lot. And I thought that was really great too.

I was convinced I had found him and I was sure all was good but out of the blue one day , things went sour and we parted ways.


Do you surround yourself with Anchors or Engines?- Kathy Ireland

After getting myself together and happily on my feet again in the relationship department, I had a close associate relate his office wars and the closure of their company through mismanagement of funds. Naturally I sympathized with him and felt for him too.

A few months latter the company I was working for got a major shake up, it eventually ground to a halt. It was totally unexpected, but there again I asked myself what happened and what gone wrong. I put all my energy in getting myself on my feet again. I reasoned companies went through such many times over and some never got back into business again.

Some years back I moved into a very nice complex and in the intern got to meet and be introduced to my neighbors, though I never got to see them that much, as I always left early for the office and came back late.

I occasionally dumped into a face or two over the weekend, it was on one such occasion that a neighbor volunteered some information that I never thought much of until much later. She said that the tenants in the apartment she was residing had left abruptly and never paid their rent.

Scroll to Continue

I listened politely not really knowing what to say . Then three months later I noticed that that particular flat was vacant, and later learnt my neighbor had left abruptly without paying her rent too.

It wasn’t coincidence or bad luck for the landlord or the agent either; it was just the power of association at work. What a person associates with, or makes themselves a part of rubs off on them too..

Who you associate with makes a difference in how far you go in life. - Author: Joel Osteen

I recently learnt about the power of association and released that what we listen to or what comes into our ears has a way of affecting our lives. It made me realize that half the things that happen to people isn't because of bad luck, as most people always like to conclude.

People just attract by association without realizing it and the more they associated with people who had disintegrated lives the more it affected their own lives too. It explained a lot of what I had experienced as a result of listening to other people's problems and that helped me a lot.

It also made me understand why most people I know are divorced, i realised that all of their parents are divorced or had been divorced at one point in their lives. I met a man, once who was on the outlook for wife number four, on further investigation I found out that his father was on wife number three


''People you choose to associate with in life determine a lot of where you are going in life.'' Steve Harvey

Always work on associating yourself with people that have :

  • Great things happening in their lives happening in their lives

And those Who:

  • have had goals and visions
  • have dreams.
  • have ambition to do and to be great.

I must say there is a huge difference between people who have an ambition in life than those who don’t. Whatever they have always rubs off on you so it is really up to you to select wisely.

It is also wise to try and find out the type of friends your prospective girlfriend/ boy friend hangs out with. I know so many young people who had a lot going on for them but ended up with nothing because of wrong associations. I have also seen man who were successful but ended with nothing when they changed their girl friends or their wives.

You can never underestimate the power of association, it can either propel you to greatness or it can drag you down, and no matter how much you do try you never move upwards, it keeps you pulling you downwards.


Types of environments to associate yourself with:

There is a force behind every association and you must be careful to understand its nature if you want to progress in life.

It is never a lack of opportunities that things have somehow ground to a halt, make a careful search and you will realize that that new acquaintance might not be quite the right person to rub shoulders with.

It is also imperative that you :

  • stop listening to sad stories
  • stop paying attention to broken down relationships and marriage

  • Start keeping your ears on ground for;
  • good relationships
  • successful stories
  • News of thriving marriages
  • News of thriving relationships
  • News of thriving businesses.
  • It is your business to look for motivating content and dissociate from news that you derail you.

    • look for friends that challenge you to get the best out of yourself
    • surround yourself with people who inspire you and not those who bring you down.

By associating with wise people you become wise yourself-Menander

You can only develop a winners mentality if you surround yourself with winners

Be part of a powerful force that is always getting things done.

Arm yourself with books that motivate you, keep moving and never stop

Get into relationships that inspire you to get the most and the best out of you.

Look at association as a tool to evaluate people, and your environment, the moment you fall into step with the right people you will find that everything in your life starts falling into place, and everything starts moving smoothly; winning becomes the tune of your days. Access your friends, and those places where you chose to hang out, and ask yourself if they are a plus or a minus in your life, ask yourself if anything has changed since you started associating with your new neighbor.

The ball is in your court play it well.

Who do you associate with?


charity mtisi (author) from Johannesburg on March 25, 2019:

hie Miebakagh thank you for your contribution. Yes it is true that like attracts like but i think most people associate with the wrong crowds because for various reasons. some want to identify with a particular set, they think that's where they belong never realising that they making themselves worse. Others do so because they are convinced they can never belong be accepted anywhere else.

Miebakagh Fiberesima from Port Harcourt, Rivers State, NIGERIA. on March 25, 2019:

Hi, Charity, it is said that like attracts like. But why some people associated with dis-likes that leads to nowhere baffled the mind. They see no good results yet gen on with the bad crowd. Do you think the mindset is somehow sick? Or is it a sort of psychological imbalances? Thank you.

Related Articles