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The Effects of Domestic Violence on Children


Domestic violence happens more than most people think. It happens in households with high incomes just as much as it does in poor households. It really doesn’t matter what religion, race or political party you are. Most people from every walk of life have experienced domestic violence or know someone that has experienced it. We all feel terrible when we hear the horrific stories of the victims of domestic violence, but the victims that are affected the most are the children. When children are exposed to domestic violence in their households it can have a devastating effect on them that can sometimes last a lifetime.

Many of us grew up experiencing abuse or watching someone we love be abused. When you are abused the physical wounds eventually heal, but I don't think you ever fully heal emotionally. The effects of witnessing domestic violence can be life changing. Some children who have witnessed domestic violence feel ashamed and embarrassed to tell anyone. They keep the secret hidden. This sometimes causes children to become withdrawn from friends and family, for fear of someone finding out their secret.

The effects of domestic violence often will surface later on in that child's life. It will determine their view of relationships, behaviors in school, and leave them with very little confidence. Some children experience unexplained fears, become introverted, and not comfortable socializing with others.

I believe that you should never allow your children to be exposed to domestic violence. You should teach your children the meaning of respecting others and to learn how to verbally communicate to work through problems in their relationships. You should try to create a home of peace where your children can always feel safe. I sometimes think the effects of witnessing domestic violence can ultimately alter a child's life, leading them into a life of drug abuse, criminal behavior and emotional problems that will follow them for the rest of their lives.

Parents need to realize that you are not only hurting your spouse when you are violent, but you are forever affecting your children’s lives. There is no rewind button to fix the permanent damage that is done when your child witnesses this kind of violent behavior. If you are being battered and you have children, please think of your children and leave. It may be hard and you may suffer financially and emotionally for a while, but you will be saving your children from a lifetime of ill effects from witnessing such violence. If you are the one battering, please get help. There are many places you can go to ask for help. Talk to you physician, your pastor, talk to friend and ask for help. Children are innocent victims and don’t deserve to be emotionally abused.

Lastly, I would like to say if you see a child that you believe is being abused or witnessing abuse in their home, it is your responsibility as a citizen to call law enforcement and try to save that child. Please don’t look the other way, because so many children are suffering a lifetime of emotional turmoil because of the horrible violence they witness.


NayNay2124 (author) on October 23, 2012:

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Jose7polanco, domestic violence is so devasting to children, and anything we can do to protect them from harm, we should. Thanks for reading and commenting.Jos

Jose Misael Polanco from Los Angeles on October 23, 2012:

October is the domestic violence month, this month the DOJ call public concern and attention to domestic batteries and abuses.

Great that you open this overseen topic!

NayNay2124 (author) on September 27, 2012:

Larry, it took me many years to get the courage up to write this story, but I finally said that it is better for me to share this story than to keep it locked up in side of me, and maybe just maybe it could help someone else. Thank you for your continued support and your encouraging words.

Larry Wall on September 27, 2012:


You tell a tragic but touching and meaningful story about your life and the abuse you have faced. I do not know why any male, (I refuse to call them men) would physically abuse a woman for any reason. I know it happens, but it is heart breaking and sickening. As a reporter I wrote many spouse abuse stories and did stories about the opening of safe houses for women. I hope other women learn from your story that they should never accept abuse of any kind. Some women are so traumatized that they think they are causing it. They are not. If the male is unhappy, he can leave. That is a better alternative than hitting a woman. Thank you for sharing your story with us. I know God will bless you for your courage.


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