Joy sets goals for continuous achievement, and loves connecting with others by helping them reach their own ideals and aspirations.
Small Changes Add Up
Healing in Balance
There are many ideas on how to rejuvenate your soul and celebrate yourself. Many require loads of money, time, or supplies. Instead, we're going to focus on ways to celebrate your heart and achievements, without a lot of expenditure or planning.
We want to challenge you to focus on three things which work in balance:
- Healing your heart
- Allowing your mind to rest, and
- Giving your body what it needs to feel settled and cared for.
This is self-care at it's best.
We also want to challenge you to regularly pause to celebrate milestones large and small, as this builds confidence in your body and mind that you can take on huge, hairy, audacious plans, and win. And you can. You can.
Choose your inspirations from the ideas below.
Self-Love Is Necessary and Healthy
In case you have never made a point before now of celebrating yourself, just know that it is super important to learn to truly appreciate yourself and your efforts . . . not just dabble.
This kind of self-love and appreciation does not depend on perfect results on projects, or anything you undertake, nor does it depend on anyone else's approval.
For those of us who were taught early in life that an "E" for effort simply didn't exist--that our parent's or teacher's approval depended on fantastic results, confidence and poise, or conversely, emotional groveling . . . there is hope.
We can--and must--overcome this conditioning in order to lead fully satisfying, healthy lives.
Do You Feel Selfish?
Learning to celebrate yourself is not selfish. It is necessary.
The Christ of the Scriptures encourages us to love others as we love ourselves. Love and Light are found in the same person. To love yourself is to begin to spread love to others.
How can we love others if we have no love to give?
How can we have self-love if we have been conditioned to feel self-hatred and self-loathing?
Start Here, Start Now
The concept of self-love is huge, and its facets are far too many to cover here--but we can begin to practice by deliberately celebrating our efforts. We can celebrate the advances of our hearts, minds, and bodies toward positivity and compassion, even when the advances are very small.
Start wherever you are at--but start.
Let's begin together!
Trusting Light to Enter
The very first thing necessary to true self-love is to receive love from the One who is Love Himself.
Without this, you can manage only a pretense of self-appreciation.
This is because our minds tend to get tangled in the darkness. We remain there until Light sets us free. We know this in our hearts whenever we admit that we feel unduly destructive, angry or grudging, or self-loathing.
The cure is to let the One who is Light shine in our hearts, and have access to every part of our minds and bodies. He is ready and willing. All you need do is ask Him to make it so.
He created the Universe and everything in it, and now holds it together with Himself. He is the universal healing and light. It is safe enough to trust Him with yourself.
Write it Down!
Now we'll get on with specific ideas for expressing love to your uniquely created self, in all your potential and glory.
We have sorted ideas by how much time they require. There are four categories:
- 5 Minutes
- 1 Hour
- Several Hours/1 Day
- A weekend or Longer
Before you scan the lists and ideas below, get paper and a pen so you can write down ideas as they come to you. (Or open your notes app and start typing.) If you think of something fun--write it! No matter how odd or unrealistic it seems, write it down.
Your idea of fun doesn't have to match anybody else's. Plus you can sort ideas later, and several may turn out to be more doable than they at first seemed. So allow your mind and heart to run and play.
5 Minutes Matters
- Light a candle in a scent you love.
- Read 5 minutes of a book that you've been meaning to get to.
- Listen to a song. Really listen. Feel it.
- Watch a music video.
- Watch an instructional video that helps you visualize skills you want to learn.
- Do a bit of yoga or stretching.
- Do a burst of cardio, especially if you feel sluggish or out of sorts.
- Declutter your space (you'll feel better).
- Eat a piece of chocolate.
- Make your favorite beverage and enjoy it.
- Browse a magazine.
- Read an article online that you set aside with a promise to get back to it. Best are topics that you find enlightening or inspiring. (How-to's and feel-good pieces count!)
- Sit next to a plant or flower and soak in its goodness.
- Cuddle your pet.
- Go outside and read.
- Draw or color (for you, and nobody else!).
- Watch an episode of a favorite show.
- Take a walk or bike ride, in nature if possible. Notice the clouds, rocks, animals, and changing light-play.
- Make up a story about your life as lived in a favorite spot, whether real or imaginary. Write it down, sketch or scribble it, speak it into an audio file, or make a photo file filled with images which take you back there. Return to it often.
- Journal how you feel (see prompts below).
- Train your pet, or play with them.
- Listen to the rain, or breeze.
- Watch clouds drift.
- Lie in soft grass, doing nothing you don't want to do.
- Make a fun meal you enjoy. Share it only if that makes you happy.
- Avoid anything stressful or not-fun for at least 45 minutes. Turn off notifications, ignore unwanted phone calls, get away from negativity, then breathe in the relief. Exhale stress and resentment.
- Meditate, do a calming yoga routine, or choose another form of movement that calms and settles you.
Journaling Prompts for Self-Love
When journaling for self-discovery or healing, it is good to have some prompts tucked away for whenever you feel emotionally stuck.
Of course, you can alway use free writing, and learn from whatever comes out on the page. This can be hugely effective and centering. But for those times you feel full to bursting, but your writing-hand seems empty, try these prompts:
- Right now, I feel . . .
- I wish . . .
- If I could change anything, the first thing I'd do would be . . .
- A regret I want to release is . . .
- It hurts to love you because . . . (Use this one for either yourself or another person)
- My feelings about a particular object are . . . (Choose an item that brings you delight, or conversely, one you would like to avoid.)
- Right now, I would like to . . .
- I intend to visit __________, because ___________. (Make a list of reasons, write random thoughts about the place, or create a mind map of everything that appeals to you about the location. Sketch or paint illustrations, if you wish.)
- My favorite place is . . .
- I am wildly grateful for . . .
- A situation or incident that could work harmlessly to my advantage is . . .
- I want to become more . . .
- A childhood memory is . . . (You may use this prompt to explore negative memories in preparation for healing their effects, or you may say, A memory I cherish is . . .)
- A memory I want to heal is _________ If the effects of this memory were changed to positives, I would be _____________ (List or describe the specific ways in which your life and emotions would be different, then consider giving over this memory to Christ, who in His power of Light can use anything for good).
- As a parent/spouse/child etc. I want to be . . . (Choose one role and explore it, writing down the best version of yourself that you can see.)
- My perfect life looks like . . .
Use plain writing, explore poetry, or any other format that makes sense or appeals to you. Lists, mind maps, drawings and images, partial memories, unfinished scenarios, things that scare or hurt you, and nighttime dreams are all good options. The idea is to give yourself space to explore you, thereby loving your soul by giving yourself the gifts of attention and being heard. You may think of journaling in terms of self-parenting, if it helps.
Online you can find many more prompts. Try searching "journaling prompts", "getting to know you questions", or "personal history prompts".
A Day (or So)
- Watch your favorite movie, or try a new one.
- Do a whole lot of nothing in particular, while wearing your favorite (or most comfortable) clothes.
- Drink at least two mugs of your favorite comforting beverage (non-alcoholic, of course).
- Read as much as you want.
- Go rock climbing or hiking.
- Play a sport you enjoy.
- Attack a fix-it or home improvement project, which will enhace your life and bring you joy in times to come.
- Splurge on something you've been wanting for a while, or just go shopping.
- Go out with friends. Consider scheduling a day ahead of time, say, once a month, to get together and do something refreshing and memorable. (The friends make the memories worth keeping, you know.)
Really Getting Away
A Weekend or Longer
- Go somewhere that inspires you--whether it's across town, or across an ocean.
- Enlist the help of friends or family to watch your pets or children, if really getting away isn't an option. Even a night alone can do wonders for your sanity and sense of well-being.
- Attend a workshop on a subject that interests you.
- Make big progress on a home improvement project, setting yourself up for feelings of satisfaction and self-confidence.
- Start (or finish!) a project which has been waiting for you for far too long!
- Begin lifestyle changes which require much attention, rest, or planning--such as a program of fasting, spiritual exploration, or a new exercise commitment.
- Dream, dream, dream!--and write down or save images of every detail that excites you to move forward in life, and become your best you. Don't force yourself to plan--just dream, allowing your imagination to play. Learn to soar. Allow this expanded view of your possible life to be imprinted on your heart and mind, motivating you to undertake many more moments of change and challenge, which can be celebrated in turn.
Getting Away in Your Mind--Healthy Escapism
Personal Benefits of Ambient Music
The above video features appealing landscape photography, shot from a drone, and emotional music that is good for both relaxing and focusing--depending on what you want to do. It helps me, personally, to enter and maintain a calm state of mind, conducive to all things requiring focus and/or deep breathing.
I have found that by allowing myself to enter the atmosphere of such videos, I can increase my wellbeing, release negative and unwanted emotions, and heal from tension and emotional blockages.
I personally believe it is possible to increase the negative ion count around me, from merely watching such a video, similar to actually nature bathing or walking in such landscapes.
I hope and pray that you have similar results, and at the least, experience a departure from distractions, and that you find a measure of peace and joy in freer breathing.
Never Giving Up Is Success
Ideas to Start With
Write down your best ideas, and do them! Test them out a few times prior to The Day by noticing how each idea makes you feel when you see it written out. If anything makes you feel suddenly tired or anxious, scrap it. Immediately replace it with another idea. This way, you'll always have a fresh stock of ideas handy when a celebratory moment comes along!
Next time I celebrate, I want to:
_______________ (5 minutes)
_______________ (1 hour)
_______________ (several hours, 1 day)
_______________ (1 weekend)
To Help You Dream--Relax and Unwind to Wonderful Scenery of Fields
Topics Previously Covered in This Series
In Part 1, we explore why fear inhibits our ability to know what we really want, and act on it. Our thought loops often hold the key to realizing our deepest desires. Focusing on and owning these thought loops can allow us to move forward, first making the decision that fear will no longer own us.
In Part 2, we cover the basics of how to develop a vision board, whether in an electronic or physical format. We offer prompts and resources to help you decide what you truly want out of life.
In Part 3, we discuss the role of bio rhythms in setting intentions which yield pleasant fruit. When you pair your firm and detailed expectations with careful timing, cooperation from others and the Universe often results.
In Part 4, we pinpoint how to choose the perfect visuals and images for your needs, decode your personal color associations, and use past regrets and misunderstandings to help you go forward more wisely.
In part 5, we explore the decisions to be made while setting up an Intentions-by-the-Month system, using a Pinterest Board or other format of your choice. This system allows you to form a habit of setting intentions daily, or on whatever schedule you choose.
In Part 6, we walk through how to set up a long term life plan of 5 to 10 years, using either a vision board format, a mind map, or a combination of these two systems.
In Part 7, we acknowledge that manipulation and painful circumstances can make it difficult to know who you are and what you want, then present emotional and mental exercises to help you overcome the gaslighting or conditioning of others.
In Part 8, we show how becoming aware of your emotions is crucial to moving forward in your heart and life, and offer simple exercises to help you discern what you are feeling.
In Part 9, we offer tips and guidelines for creating affirmations that work for you. Developing your own personal affirmations can be a rewarding process, yielding insights into your own thoughts and motives.
In Part 10, we explore a way to develop communication between your mind and body. We focus on how to develop this communication, and offer some ways to troubleshoot resistance in your body, emotions, and mind.
In Part 11, we explore how to build courage and replace negative energy with that of healthy expectations, through the use of positive images to overcome the effects of bad memories.
In Part 12, we discuss how to tap into the free energy of the Universe to boost your own healing powers.
In Part 13, we outline how to realign your energy field with your current intentions.
In Part 14, we discuss how our bodies, hearts, and moods are all influenced by our desires and belongings, and how to make room for wellness and rest by managing what is in our thought boxes.
In Part 15, we explore how to build and maintain a sense of creativity, after your ability to express yourself has been damaged.
Our Conditions and Qualifications
In case you missed our intro before, we are an autistic DID System who have spent years exploring how trauma affects our ability to live our best life and act on our deepest needs. We have no official diagnosis, and no legal qualifications to offer advice or training on mental health conditions. Conversely, we have a decade of experience managing our Dissociative Identity Disorder, as well as about four years working to understand our autism.
Our Approach to Vision Boarding
Because fear is such a huge roadblock to stability and satisfaction, we have chosen to approach the topic of vision board development by exploring how it can be used to assist in healing and changing trauma patterns. We specifically use it to overcome fear and other trauma responses.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and does not substitute for diagnosis, prognosis, treatment, prescription, and/or dietary advice from a licensed health professional. Drugs, supplements, and natural remedies may have dangerous side effects. If pregnant or nursing, consult with a qualified provider on an individual basis. Seek immediate help if you are experiencing a medical emergency.
© 2020 Joilene Rasmussen