Jesus knows us too well
(John 2:23-25) 23Now when he was in Jerusalem at the passover, in the feast [day], many believed in his name, when they saw the miracles which he performed. 24But Jesus did not commit (entrust*) himself to them, because he knew all [men]. 25And needed not that any should testify concerning man: for he knew what was in man.
So when we see that Jesus was unwilling to “entrust” Himself to them, what is the challenge for Christian men since we have accepted Jesus as Lord and Savior? If the Holy Spirit now indwells the men of our church, are we not “entrusted”?
Start with the Bible
The easy way to determine if we're on God's page is to compare their words and actions compared to the Bible. There are good and bad examples in the Bible. But the desires of God are constant; not fickle like men.
(Psalm 118:8-9 WEB) 8[It is] better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man. 9[It is] better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in princes.
Men don't realize they've been commissioned
When men step forward to accept Jesus as their "Savior" and "Lord", they are commissioned as leaders in their homes, church, and community.
In my church, all of our outreach events, were led by women. Of the elected leaders (all men) less than half actually served in these events and never led an outreach event.
What comes first in a Christian man's agenda? Work is one, obviously (assuming he has a job). Recreation is another area that men prioritize.
But haven't they acknowledged Jesus as their Lord? Men need to seriously examine their priorities, and make sure that they're making a difference in their family and church.
Just looking at any church and there will be less men than women. Men will follow the patterns they picked up from the places they spend the most time.
Failings of Men
Many prayer concerns are mentioned in church. But shouldn’t the spiritual failings of many men also draw our attention to prayer? Don’t the failings of men also impact more than themselves? I believe the greatest responsibility of men is in the home based on the following scripture.
(Ephesians 5:25-27) 25Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
Failing in the home
In recovery groups and men's groups men have revealed to me great differences in their family structures as opposed to Biblical designs for Christian marriages. Some of those worldly patterns also includes myself while I was a lay-leader in church.
One was my lack of involvement with my sons' activities. I also did not listen well to my sons or engage them in conversation.
My temper was always a problem. Some physical and a lot of verbal. There were co-workers who I had turned off completely.
But part of my testimony was my viewing of pornography. It is a very hard habit to kick. And one that I started at age 68. I'll let you guess as to well that worked down the road.
Failing in life
In Celebrate Recovery (CR), a Christian based 12-step ministry for "hurst, habits, hang-ups, and addictions", we could openly share our struggles, fears, and angers over our dysfunctional patterns. At first new members would seem to be bragging. But after a few weeks they started to catch on to the problems they themselves had been creating.
I don't think others ever caught on to the problems in their lives. The most obvious example of this were the people who had four, five, or unknown number of baby-mamas. Others had literally hundreds of sexual encounters and would have the ordasity of blaming their spouse (or live-in girlfriend) for a single affair.
Men often claim the position of leadership based on earlier verses in Ephesians Chapter 5. But since we are “entrusted” by the Holy Spirit it behooves us to note that Jesus models “servant leadership”. And that means sacrificing ourselves for the wellbeing of our families. And that wellbeing means providing security and spiritual leadership. Men are the head of the family and should be praying accordingly to take up that responsibility.
It is scenes like this that verify the closeness of a family guided by a Godly man
Don't forget God's appointed helpmate
A wise husband will admit that his wife knows him better than anyone else, excepting the Holy Spirit. The man fixates on the goal. A woman's intuition will spot flaws in plans and her husbands friends. Her intuition is God-given by giving women more connections between the right and left sides of her brain than men.
He will also realize he's raising adults, not children. As children grow older, they should be given more age-appropriate responsibilities.
Men are the one person in the family that God looks to for responsibility. Everyone needs to be responsible. But it is men that God will look to for that model and accepts that the father and husband has the last word.
Parents will teach their children more by the behaviors they exhibit than they will with words. They should see parents that practice loving each other. Parents should be active in church and civic activities. Their friends should also be of good character.
Like an Army
There's no need to determine who's the head of the army; it is Jesus. Within the corps, each man is to look out for every other man. These are called accountability groups. They exist to discipline, train, and support on another.
There needs to be introspection, honesty, confidentiality, and input from every member. Once these elements are in place, men will freely open up to each other and will improve themselves without being fixed by another man. Each man's story is different, but there is enough similarity, that men can recognize their strengths and weaknesses in each other's experiences.
© 2022 Jay Warcamp