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Life and Aging: How to Cope With the Future


Why we worry and how it can effect the body

Why do we worry?

People worry about the future or, life in general. Worrying is normal it's part of being human. Some people even have plans for their lives. When those plans don't work out it can cause distress. Worrying can cause your body to go through physical changes or, even become ill.

Worries, doubts, and anxieties are a normal part of life. It's natural to worry about an unpaid bill, an upcoming job interview, or a first date. But "normal" worry becomes excessive when it's persistent and uncontrollable. You worry every day about many different things, you can't get anxious thoughts out of your head, and it interferes with your daily life.

Excessive worrying can make you physically ill

Excessive worry can cause emotional stress and trigger serious health problems. The problem occurs when fight or flight is triggered daily by excessive worry. This may cause a sympathetic nervous system to release stress hormones such as cortisol.

Some physical effects of excessive worrying can be dangerous. Some of those effects are:

  • Anxiety
  • Stress
  • Fatigue
  • Dizziness
  • Dry mouth
  • Headaches
  • Fast heartbeat
  • Nausea
  • Nervous energy

Feeling like a Failure

Being worried all the time and feeling like you have'nt accomplished anything can make you feel like a failure. Feeling like a failure can cause someone to have anxiety, stress and even become depressed. Failure time and time again can be discouraging and cause people to just give up all together.

I can relate to feeling like a failure more then once. When I was 18 I had to be actress that plan feel through. I learned at a very young age that life can be unpredictable. I planned to get a job as I made it in Hollywood. However, the reality was that I couldn't even get a job at a restaurant. I ran out of money and ended up homeless sleeping on the beach.

I eventually found a job a grocery store, enrolled in college and after 6 years of hard work got my degree. At this time I am 31 and wanting to start my new career after 10 years at a grocery store. Now 3 years later I find myself not using my degree, $38,100 in debt, and stuck at a daycare job.

I put in application after application and still can't even get an interview. Again I had a plan and failed once again. I started to really think about my future and what legacy I'm going to leave behind when I die. I start to worry if I will ever find a husband. I am on all these dating sites and still haven't had a connection with anyone.

Here I am at 34 years old with no husband, no child of my own and no career, worrying about if I will ever have these things. At my age people are starting their own families and careers are thriving. They are just living their lives and making memories. While I'm here just standing still letting life past me by.

I have these goals that I have accomplished and a "decent life" but, still not what I want. There is still things that I have yet to accomplish things I afraid that never will happen. I worry that I may just have to settle for the life I have now and may never be a mother or, wife. I may never get that dream job, this is the hand I was dealt and just meant to be.

Feeling like a failure can cause serious health problems:

  • stress
  • depression
  • self- esteem
  • self confidence
  • giving up

Failure can make you want to give up on everything and not even want to try. It you let it can ruin you. We need to learn from our failure and try again until we find success.

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7 Ways to cope and stop worrying

People need to worry less and live life more. We can acknowledge are feelings and them move on. Th key is to learn how to cope so, it doesn't take over our lives.

If you find yourself constantly worrying about life just stop. Worrying can be really stressful and a waste of your time. So, stop worrying and learn how to manage it. Now I am going to list 7 ways you can cope with worrying.

  1. Problem-solve, don’t worry: Worrying is normally a very inefficient attempt to problem-solve. So when you worry, try to turn this into useful problem solving by considering what you need to do now to deal with the problem. You might want to have a look at this website which provides a useful guide to developing your practical problem-solving skills.
  2. Don’t waste time on “What if..?” questions: Don’t waste time thinking up situations that ‘might’ happen, but in reality are quite unlikely to happen – that is just a misuse of good brain time! Try to spot when you start asking yourself “What if…?” type questions. The vast majority of the scenarios you create using this approach are never likely to happen – so why waste time thinking about them?
  3. Learn to accept uncertainty: Uncertainty is a fact of life, so try to accept that you will always have to live with and tolerate some uncertainty. Unexpected things happen, and accepting this in the longer term will make your life easier and reduce your anxieties. No that the future is not in your control and just live everyday like it your last.
  4. Change your mood: Negative moods can make you worrying worse then it is. Ii can cause you to feel angry, sadness or. insecure. You can try putting on some relaxing music. Music can help you relax and stimuli your brain cells. Acknowledge your feeling and move on don't dwell on them.
  5. Try something new: Try something new and different giving yourself something interesting to do can make a world of difference. May travel to different cities or, states. This can be fun and exciting and take your mind of the negatives in you life.
  6. Distract yourself with something you enjoy: Try doing something that's fun or, relieves stress. I enjoy working out maybe try exercise it can be s stress reliver and also help your body stay healthy. Watch a movie or your favorite show. Do things that you can actually control and focus on that.
  7. Stay in the moment: Live in the moment that you have now and make memories. Worrying about the " what if's" or the future that is out of your control is waste. That just takes away from the precious moments that can you be having now. Set daily goals meet them an then move on to the next , one this can build self-esteem.

These coping ideas do work if only temporary but, its worth a try. We need to get out of our heads a bit and live life. Live in the moment and enjoy, everything else will fall in line.

Don't worry be happy


In closing

Life is what you make it, it may throw you curve balls that your not ready for but, that ok. We need to accept it and then move on. Of course we keep trying and working hard to get were we want to be. However ,it is important that to know that some things are out of our control.

We should focus on what's in our control and adapt and juts live life. We need to live life as if it is our last. Make memories and have no regrets instead of wasting time feeling sorry for ourselves. I've learned to count my blessings and live ,y lige. Live your life , love be happy and have no regrets.


Sequoia Coleman (author) from Los Angeles on August 04, 2018:

Thank you Dora and Carolyn for your kind words.I am really trying to count my blessings and keep a positive attitude. Life is too short to be negative my priorities and passions have changed. Its best to live and the moment and to have what you need, not always what you want. I will not let another negative that take away my joy.

Dora Weithers from The Caribbean on July 23, 2018:

It is great to express these feelings in writing. Your life is not over, and if you keep on expecting something good to happen, it will. Be patient while you follow the prescription you dish out in your "How To" section. Enjoy today and tomorrow will bring its own joys.

Carolyn Fields from South Dakota, USA on July 22, 2018:

Counting your blessings, and valuing what you have are two very important behaviors. It's all part of having an "attitude of gratitude."

Also, you bring up an excellent point about dating. You need to be comfortable with yourself first, before you can expect to be successful at dating. Don't worry about being "pretty." From my perspective, if you have a good attitude about yourself and life, are kind and generous, that is much more important than being pretty. Good grooming goes without saying, of course, but beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Continue to make the best out of life, and karma will reward you. Of that I am certain.

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