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I Have Cancer: Now What? Biopsy Results and Plans

Life happens, and I am so tired of it happening on me and my family. Satan has pitched a tent in our yard, and now he's building a high rise

Happier days

Happier days

Monday morning, the phone rings...

Cox Health calling. It was my doctor with the results of the biopsy. Cancer confirmed. One half of my prostate is engulfed in cancer. Then he begins to talk about the options. For someone in their 70's he feels good about the "wait and see" method, but not for me. I'm 62 today!

The second method is surgery, removing it completely. Of course, this comes with a probability of incontinence and well, uh, erection issues. But it is highly successful at eliminating the cancer itself. So, an option, albeit not one without serious side effects.

The third option is radiation, or seeds as they call them. This means they insert some small radiation pieces inside to rid me of the cancer. There are side effects to both options, with quicker but shorter lasting ones with surgery, and longer lasting ones with the seeds. Both have good track records, and both have issues.

Right now, I am being scheduled to speak with a surgeon about having it removed. Then, I will speak with another doctor about the seeds. I do not know which way I will choose.

When Joplin, Mo. was struck by the F5 tornado in 2011, there was an overwhelming feeling of dread and despair. People I knew and had grown up with had been killed, not due to sickness but a sudden, violent and seemingly senseless act of nature. But Joplin came together and everyone felt connected, even with people from across the globe.

This is different. More personal to me, as it is happening to me directly. Again it seems senseless as I live a clean life, one without cigarettes, alcohol or drugs but it matters not.

But it is no less despairing to my family and I, and probably even more so. I cannot process it yet, it has happened way too fast for me senses to cope with. September, all is fine. October, you have cancer. November, prep for surgery. Combined with losing my job when I notified the board of directors and filed my FMLA documents, my entire staff losing their jobs, being told by one board member when asked about it being the holidays "What does that matter?".

Cold-hearted people in charge of our lives.

This board...

Tuesday may have been the worst day of my life. My wife takes her dog to the groomer and literally minutes later I hear someone at our door. It is the board president and the one maintenance person who remained behind and is working for them. The reason? He has no drivers license due to a 20 year old DUI. He has dodged the courts for years, and currently has a warrant out for his arrest on failure to show up in court; he cannot get another job. Of course, once the transition is complete he will no longer have a job anyway, but he is fooling himself into thinking he will be spared. No chance.

Anyway, after a conversation through the door (which I believe they were going to open, thinking no one was at home) they asked to speak like adults, not be a child hiding behind the door. I stated several times that I had sent an email to him, asking the status of my job, our place to live on site, and what I was going to be asked to do during the transition. He refused to speak about it and despite multiple attempts to have him respond in writing, he refused and they finally walked off.

Ten minutes later, our water was shut off.

Yes, they shut our water off. They own this condo we live in and are required to live in while working for them. They have no decency to speak honestly, put anything in writing; but are willing to act in a terroristic manner to get what they want.


I give up.

My wife came home. I heard someone at the door and feared they were back. I got my 9 mm pistol and stood waiting as she opened the door. When I told her what had happened, she was furious, and scared.

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I told her that I was done, that I could no longer put up with these people and play their games. She called the school district, who called the office and listened as they lied about who was there, why the water was off to a place where a minor child lived. They backtracked, then said there was a water issue all over the property. Liars. She contacted an owner who lives here and there was no problem at all.

I sent an email telling them I was done; I resign. I included every password I had, and told them to turn my water back on.

Ten minutes later, we had water. Bastards. I knew if they were willing to do that soon our electric would be off, cable, everything. We were at their whim and had no power whatsoever.

Then I emailed the owners and told them everything. There are some seriously pissed off people here now.

Today, I received an email from the board president; saying they accept my resignation, that I have 30 days to vacate the property, and that I am not allowed to say anything to any owner, or even speak with them so long as I am on property or immediate eviction will follow. I cannot go on social media, cannot utter a word. I am silenced.

Happy Holidays to my family.

The school district is assisting in finding somewhere for us to go so our son can graduate with his friends. They found one, albeit temporary, only through March. Then, we must try to find somewhere else for two months. But, this place allows no pets; we have pets, a dog and a cat.

So, the place we bought as a retirement home and have been fixing up two hours away is where my wife will live while our son and I remain near Branson so he can graduate. For almost six months, we will be apart most of the week, driving down to see her on weekends.

All while I undergo treatment for my cancer. Dear God, how much more are we expected to take?

Tuesday was brutal, Thursday was a blessing

I have never, ever felt as bad as I did Tuesday after all that went down. I laid on the couch or in bed, waiting. For what I do not know. Oblivion, I guess.

That day finally ended and Wednesday we packed up and went to our retirement home. We spent the day prepping for Thanksgiving before learning our eldest son would not be able to come and bring his family, including our grandson. He has COVID, despite being vaccinated fully. Then our middle son, who lives in Kansas, called to say he and his girlfriend wouldn't be coming, again due to COVID.

So Thursday dawned with our daughters, their husbands and our new granddaughter arriving to spend the day. Along with our youngest son, we made the day great, eating and talking, enjoying one another. Then we made a huge to go package and took to our eldest son for he and his family. In return, we got pictures of our one year old grandson walking around eating a BBQ meatball on a fork happily.

I'll take that.

The girls had to return home, taking leftovers for days with them. Friday, we returned to Hell and immediately I was in a foul mood. I cannot wait to leave this place. That will be one problem gone, then I can focus on myself and getting treatment. And our son graduating. And missing my wife too many days each week.

Summer cannot come quickly enough.

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2021 Mr Archer

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