Author Cheryl is an advocate for abused women and children. Her goal is to educate women regarding financial abuse.
When You Look in the Mirror What Do You See
You Are Love
Many people spend their entire lives finding fault in themselves. They really don't see themselves as others see them. You're too fat, too ugly, have too many wrinkles, too many freckles and there is nothing that you love about you.
That is farther from the truth. You are perfect in someone else's eyes. If you took a poll of 100 people and asked them to find one flaw in you and one good thing, I guarantee the good thing would be the easiest for them to find.
Our entire lives have been made on showroom models and how we should be just like them. Look great, be skinny, have nice legs, wear nice clothes but in the real world this is not true. Companies hire these models to sell their products.
Do you think you could sell a product just as well as a gorgeous model who after her selling career is over, has nothing to fall back on.
Life has to start with you. It has to be about you and what you want and what you love. That love needs to be you loving yourself. If five of your friends were asked what do you like about them the most, you would probably get answers like they are a good friend, they are so caring to other people, they think about everyone else but themselves. No one would say oh she is very pretty or has a hot body because they love you for you.
In the video I have added to this article you will see an artist who never sees a person but draws them by their words then has someone else describe them while he draws them from their description. The part that touched me the most is the woman who said the way I described myself seemed unhappy and the other picture that was drawn of her was a happy person. So she saw herself as an unhappy person when a stranger never would say that about her.
You have to learn to love yourself just the way you are and know that you are someone who deserves to be treated with respect and love. If you get any less then that then you do not need that person in your life.
How to Love Yourself
We spend so much time waiting to be loved, hoping love will find us, searching, yearning for that special love. Feeling empty and lost without it. Wanting someone to give us love and fill us up. Unfortunately, that’s not usually how life works. Loving yourself is mainly having self-respect, which is the only dependable way to create love in your own life to share with others. When you expect love from an external source, and someone or something does not fulfill your void and fantasies, then you will feel worse than before. (Wikipedia)
1.Treat others with love and respect
2 Create goodwill and thankfulness by practicing random deeds of kindness
3. Express yourself, perhaps in a diary, or through short stories
4 Learn to let go of past events
5. Forgive yourself
6. Put positive statements up some places where you will see them each and every day
7. Sit in front of the mirror
8. Try to look past "material" objects and feelings
9. Keep a journal
10. Be persistent
The squeaky wheel gets heard. Love yourself so that you may love others the right way.
Loving Yourself Sets The Tone For Your Life
Falling in Love With You
The one thing that this world does not have enough of is love and the only way that this can be achieved is if you start by loving yourself. Take the time you need to work on you and to love you. We all have attributes that we need to work on. If you can't love yourself you can't love others. When you are looking for a new relationship concentrate on being up beat and talk about your good qualities. You new partner doesn't want to look at you as a Debbie Downer type person. No one likes someone that always complains about themselves.
Hold your head up and walk with others not behind others. You are a valuable human being and you need to know that. Life won't hold your hand and guide you. That is solely up to you to pick the right path. If you don't care what happens to you then you will end up going down the road of doom.
Your Success Begins With You
There are many things that can hold you back from where you want to be. Everything that you see about yourself will help or hinder a new job, new relationship, etc. We all want to be accepted but you are your worst critic. At some point in a day, if you run into a stranger and start a conversation, ask them if they can tell you one good thing they have to say about you. You probably would be surprised by that answer.
At my job, we are all very close. None of us is afraid to tell the other what they need to improve. Sometimes it is people like this you need. If they can be honest to you why can't you be honest with yourself. If you really think you are that bad, then get help to work on what is wrong. I can assure you that you will feel so much better in the end.
If you see your ex with a woman who looks way better then you did, don't worry because he will still treat her like he treated you. Hold your head up and stop feeling sorry for yourself.
Open Your Arms and Leap in Faith
You Have to Make Yourself Happy
Moving forward from a broken relationship, death of a loved one, loss of employment, divorce and an illness can be one of the hardest things you have to do in life. The only way that you can get through the bad is to see the good in yourself.
Even if it's a minor move like putting on a little make up or cleaning yourself up will make you feel better. Life isn't always going to be pleasant but you have to make you happy before you can make others happy.
You don't need someone else to give you flowers. Give yourself flowers, do things you enjoy without the need of someone else there. Take a warm bath with a nice smelling bath ball, post positive affirmations on post it notes and put them around your house. Contribute to society by finding a job that you love. Don't spend your life in a job you hate.
When its all said and done you are the most important person in your life. Enjoy your life to the fullest.
Ara on April 18, 2016:
After someone betrays me or tries to, I stop caring. This has been the story of all my relationships. I can't forgive and therefore don't believe in happiness; at least for me.
I want to find true happiness within me but I can't seem to do it no Mathis hard I try.
Cheryl A Whitsett (author) from Jacksonville, Fl on March 13, 2014:
Thank you both for stopping by to read my hub.
kerlund74 from Sweden on March 13, 2014:
I think this is an issue for so many people. An important thing is that all we think about ourselves becomes true to us, not to anyone else. Then I think your advices are useful!
Madeleine Salin from Finland on March 12, 2014:
I'm happy with who I am today, but in ny teens there were many things I would have liked to change about my looks. I really like the video. I saw it for the first time some months ago. Nice hub!