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How To Control Your Emotions?

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Just another writer who is trying hard to write a viral story.

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I don't want to be at the mercy of my emotions. I want to use them, to enjoy them, and to dominate them.

Emotion has a bad reputation in our society. People often attach it to being weak or losing control. But, in my point of view, emotions help us in connecting with others at a deeper level. They are very important because they give us a connection to the information generated inside of our bodies. Emotions have developed to help us to be able to survive and avoid threats. Controlling emotion is an important issue to discuss. Knowing where and when to react can help you in various tasks of daily life. Emotional control is necessary for progressing in life happily and successfully. Psychic control guides us that there is no need to tell everybody about our trials or hard times. Some people make moods of others off because of their bad mood. The reason behind losing control is that they are unable to conduct a certain behavior during difficult situations, and that’s a really bad thing one can do.

James J. Gross is a well-known researcher for his study on emotion and emotional regulation. He is a psychologist and professor at Stanford University. He explained,

The inability to control or regulate your emotions is the root cause of some psychological disorders including depression, social anxiety, and borderline personality.

No matter how psychologically healthy we think we are, most people can benefit from learning to manage their feelings in everyday life. With the right habits, you can rescue yourself from overwhelming negativity and keep your emotions under control. To control your emotions there are nine easy steps to follow.

  1. Do physical activities
  2. Label your feelings
  3. Ask yourself question
  4. Have self-awareness
  5. Focus on positive experiences
  6. Distinguish feelings
  7. Create personal space
  8. Buy satisfaction
  9. Avoid emotional toxins

1. Do physical activities

Bodily movements can relieve stress and enable you to perform through tough emotions. You may not think physical activity influences the way you think, but exercising has a profound impact on your attitude and condition of mind. Physical movement is a verified stress-reliever. It also delivers harmony in your life, giving you a much-needed sense of stability and control. When you’re struggling to manage your emotions, get your body moving. Spend at least 15 minutes doing yoga daily. Wander around your residents. Stretch your arms and legs. A little exercise can completely alter your feelings.

2. Label your feelings

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Labeling your feelings is another valuable strategy to handle your emotions. Many people work hard to manage the negativity because they don’t understand their feelings sometimes and the reason behind their certain feelings. For example, you might be feeling down after making a blunder at work. You know you’re feeling negative because you might be worried about making mistakes in the future or be tense about your reputation among your coworkers. Each feeling pinpoints a remarkable, complex emotion that impacts you in a certain way. If you deduce what you’re feeling, you can handle your emotions and discover coping means that work for you. So, whenever you feel down, give your feelings a name like sadness, anger, anxiousness, shame, insecurity, etc. Be specific because every emotion, even the ones that you don’t like, deserve your time and attention.

3. Ask yourself question

The better you understand your emotions, the more you can control them. When you feel bad, ask yourself questions regarding your emotions at that time, the same as you ask others about. You get irritated with yourself when your unfavorable emotions don’t fade instantly. But, how does it feel to treat yourself like you treat your friends or family members in their hard times? When you’re struggling to control your emotions, ask yourself questions about the way you feel. Explore more in-depth into the emotions that create tension and negativity in your life. Some people might feel weird having a conversation or asking questions with themselves. But these moments of self-compassion assist you to comprehend the way you feel.

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4. Have self-awareness

Writing doesn’t come innately to everyone. Some individuals avoid penning because they put high expectations on them that they are able to speak about their emotions confidently. Other people gaze at a blank page and think, “I don’t have anything to say.” Documenting in a journal is a beneficial practice. Journals offer you an area to write in total privacy. No one will read what you write. That means you can write about anything you want in any way you want. Your journal may be a portal for your feelings if you try to understand your emotions better. You can ask yourself questions, explore emotions, and consult your problems without suspicion of critique or objection. Even if you don’t know what to say, try for just 15 minutes to write about your emotions. Say whatever arrives in your mind. Explore whatever you feel. You might not be able to say anything special at that time but even the simplest forms of expression can alter your viewpoint.

5. Focus on positive experiences

In the difficult times of fear, insult, insecurity moments your thoughts spiral out of control. Little issues turn into utter disasters, and it feels like you can do nothing. There is an effective way to dominate your emotions. Sometimes you’re burdened by a silly mistake you made earlier, you're filled with regret, wishing you could have done things differently. Whenever you’re trapped in a whirl of negativity, calculate your blessings rather than the burdens. In simple words, divert your attention from negative incidents to positive ones. Concentrate on happy and uplifting moments instead of errors or regrets. It allows making a list of thrilling, inspiring, and unforgettable experiences. Think about your adventures, your passions, and your best friends. Think about barriers overcame and objectives accomplished by you. If you can memorize your most favourable moments, you can recover from the most overwhelming feelings.

6. Distinguish feelings

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According to an investigation in the journal Cognition and Emotion,

one skill set gives you significantly more control over your emotions.

People take offense and frustration as substitutable emotions, but they are separate. You encounter offense when a person or event has in some way done you wrong. For example, if somebody makes fun of you, that causes you to anger. On the other hand, you encounter frustration when you experience something you cannot adjust or manage. For example, you worked too hard to gain a promotion but you did not get it, which makes you frustrated. All the people who can distinguish between anger and frustration can control their emotions better. Spend a few minutes every day understanding the feeling behind every emotion, if you want to control your emotions in a better way.

7. Create personal space

When you feel swamped, it’s essential to find freedom away from everything. Flee to a spot where you can live, ponder, and reflect on your feelings. Responsibilities and expectations create stress, shame, and insecurity in your life, all of which amplifies your negativity. Living your life is a weighty burden. Don’t be scared to create room when you require it. Even if you have an engaged timetable, spend some minutes on yourself. A few minutes of isolation can stabilize your spirit, remove away the fog, and provide you with some much-needed perspective.

8. Buy satisfaction

Spending money is one of the extremely famous coping agents in the world. People purchase costly or luxury objects to fill gaps in their lives. But, it is widely accepted that money can't buy you happiness. No amount of careless spending will change the way you feel. It doesn't mean that money is unable to affect your emotions. Although, spending money is not going to make you happy forever. You can’t buy a lifetime of positivity. But the funds you expend and the items you purchase, all is in your hands. Researchers found in a study that certain spending habits encourage more positive emotions. Offering money to needy persons can bring you more happiness than spending money on yourself. They discovered a strong connection between happiness and helping donations.

9. Avoid emotional toxins

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To gain more power over your feelings, you need to adjust the way you manage negativity. People get angry at their anger and frustrated with their frustration, without understanding that emotions are not a toxin they require to rid of the body.

Negativity is like harm you need to cultivate and care for. It means figuring out the root of the problem and paying attention to your vulnerabilities. Don’t treat your emotions like your enemy. It’s not a bad thing to have a range of positive and negative emotions. The most emotionally intelligent people try hard to experience all kinds of emotions, positive and negative, freely. The reason you lose control isn’t that you can get angry. It’s because you’re ashamed of your anger. If you stop denying your emotions, you may discover those feelings aren’t as toxic as you thought.

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and does not substitute for diagnosis, prognosis, treatment, prescription, and/or dietary advice from a licensed health professional. Drugs, supplements, and natural remedies may have dangerous side effects. If pregnant or nursing, consult with a qualified provider on an individual basis. Seek immediate help if you are experiencing a medical emergency.

© 2022 S Saleha

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