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Hope Brings Me out of Dark Depression

All through the 27 years I've dealt with bipolar depression, I always cling to my childhood upbringing of the idea that there is a loving Fatherly God who watches over me and protects me.

My coping skills during my darkest moments of pain have always been to

  • journal
  • connect with others in person or on phone
  • allowing my heart to hope and pray and know that I have a brighter future, that pain is temporary and that God will not give me more than I can handle.

But the way you need to access God's comfort and peace is through prayer, and bible reading, and listen to Him. One cannot receive the peace of God otherwise, and I think that is why many who are not spiritual are not able to persevere. There has always been a huge difference in my soul when I prayed or did not.

In times when I left prayer alone, and stopped talking to God or asking for His help, I was worse off, always.


Happy times! With my nephew!

Happy times! With my nephew!

Pain makes us empathetic and more able to help others

Difficulties over time have made me more empathetic; I always felt secure that God had me in the palm of His hand, but I certainly have been tested, and felt very dark times, many times over the years. I certainly have not been spared deep suffering, but I repeat, I clung to my prayer life, and my coping skills, and every time I made it through.

A nice quote I've heard is, "You've made it thus far, you can make it through this time too!"

I am truly grateful to depend of God, because many times in life we are alone, or feel alone, but with God, one is never alone!

This faith I've had has kept me from much trouble, much worse things. I would like to say may everyone always have hope that things can and will inevitably get better over time with therapy, support, friends, better medications, and hard work. All things are possible if you believe!

I feel rewarded. I feel I am watched over. Because I have a lovely place to live, and I'm provided for, in addition to a good job. I have had things work out for me. I feel God protects me. I pray for safe travels daily, I pray for my day to go well, and to have a positive attitude. And I even ask God to provide financially and He has done so, on more than one occasion. I have prayed for signs too, that a loved one was in heaven and got the sign I asked for.


My painting

My painting

Dreams do come true!

Dreams do come true- In the past 3 years, I gave a speech at McLean hospital about my books I self published and my recovery, I got back into art, got a job which I've had for 9 months, and became a group facilitator. And I just leased my second car. I am blessed!

My blood pressure improved with weight loss. I feel more alive and confident as well. I will always be grateful to my peers for their support! No one understands you like someone who's walked in your shoes!

I heard in a sermon that D=S-M. Depression equals Suffering minus Meaning.

As Christian Catholic I can not only offer up my suffering and (make use of it), but I can reach out to others to see how they are doing, and be with others and many times I see someone worse off that me, and it puts my mind in perspective that I'm not the one worst off, and I can comfort others and be of help and THAT makes me feel special and loved.

Let us never forget our value in other's lives!

God bless you!


Life will never be perfect

Well, in many cases, as we read in the lives of the saints, the catholic saints, they suffered immensely, but persevered. I'm just saying, just because we believe, we are not going to have easy lives, but if we don't believe, we will not get the comfort God provides either.

I choose to get that comfort. It's a personal choice. It has kept me from self destructive behavior. The grace God provides is supernatural and protects. But you must ask for it.

I'm not here to judge those who choose not to pray,

But if you haven't tried it, I ask you to try because I want the best for you, I want everyone to have a Heavenly Father who loves them, and be able to get comfort from it.

Thanks for your time.


Leave a comment please. Even if you've had bad experience with church/let's talk!

schoolgirlforreal (author) on February 15, 2021:

Thank you!!! I appreciate your feedback very much. Bless you, :)

gyanendra mocktan from Kathmandu,Nepal on February 15, 2021:

Sorry typo: to have read.

gyanendra mocktan from Kathmandu,Nepal on February 15, 2021:

It's a rare opportunity for me have read your article. I know how you have overcome the problems of daily life through prayers

One may be Chatholic, or protestant or Hindu or Buddhust or Mosleme prayer leads us to higher above.

I believe in surrender to God and pray. Than you schoolgirlforreal. Amen Ameen, Om!!

schoolgirlforreal (author) on April 28, 2019:

Good morning James,

Great to wake up and see your comment, Thank you! Have a great day !

James A Watkins from Chicago on April 28, 2019:

I so enjoyed reading about your journey to greater happiness, peace, success, and joy.

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