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Get Rid of Stress and Worry

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Worry Optional?

My Problem with Worry

I used to worry about everything, starting as soon as my eyes opened in the morning and lasting off and on throughout the day. It was like I was carrying a physical weight on my shoulders. Although I had some serious problems in my life at that time, the worry never accomplished anything.

I worried about my children, my bills, my parents, the house and most of all my impending divorce. The bulk of my “worry time” concerned tomorrow, as I had a lot of fear and did not know how to change the feeling of impending doom. My X-husband was volatile and threatening toward me, so my fears were legitimate, but it was still up to me to come up with solutions that were good for me and my children.

Lessons Learned

I don’t remember the name of the book I was reading, but it suggested that you write everything down you’re worried about and put it in a jar. Wait a week and open the jar. I did this and almost every worry had never happened. That didn’t cure me, but it did help put my life into a better perspective.

I began to realize that all my worries were affecting me physically. So, I did join a group support group. That helped me because I realized I wasn’t the only one living this way, and I made new friends that would tell me the straight truth. When I wanted sympathy, I could always call my mom and get the “poor baby” response, but when I wanted straight talk I discussed problems with a friend who was not so emotionally involved in my life.

Over time my problems started being sorted out, and I literally made a decision each morning that I was going to focus on just this day. I didn’t stop worrying immediately, but I was starting to sleep better.

Research Results

Most of the things we worry about never happen, and now there is a research study that proves this point. It is not abnormal to have a few worries, such as being in college and getting ready to take a final exam.

The University of Cincinnati did pilot research on excessive worrying in adolescents between 12 and 17 years of age. They concluded that 85% of worries never happened. Additionally, of the 15% of the worries that did happen, 79% of the time they were surprised at their ability to handle the situations.

You Are Okay



Developing New Habits

They say it takes 30 days to develop a new habit. I don’t know if that is true, but being consistent with my new way to live sure made me feel better. I started trusting that little feeling in my tummy when making a decision. The result was I was trusting my instincts and making better decisions.

When we’re worried or are under stress, all we see are problems, but once we’ve quieted the brain, control will shift from the lower to the higher brain where creative intelligence kicks in. That is when we start to see solutions.

Bobby McFerrin - Don't Worry Be Happy

Possible Physical Effects

Worrying has such a negative effect on your health as it makes you tired, stressed, speeds up and aging process, and it can make you more prone to depression.

Worry has the same physical effects as the way we respond to danger. So, what happens physically to your body when you are under stress?

  1. Your brain releases stress hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol.
  2. Your heart rate increases.
  3. Your blood pressure rises.
  4. Your breathing rate increases and you perspire more.
  5. You become pale as the blood is diverted to your major organs.

Insomnia is another side effect of worry, as is loss of libido. Sometimes people become more absent-minded also. The physical effects of stress are hard on the body, and if you are living under a lot of stress it is time to make some changes.



Ways to Overcome Anxiety

Identify the anxiety source as understanding the anxiety, the source will help you find a solution. Decide if there is something you can do about your problem.

Scroll to Continue

If it is an imagined fear, then it is time to make a conscious effort to forget about it. If there is an action you can take, then do not hesitate.

Take the action, whether it means confronting an individual or making a plan as to how to get out of debt. You have to begin to take control of your life if you want relief.

Deal with one problem at a time.

Consider the worst possible outcome of your fear honestly before you panic or react without thinking through your actions. Thinking critically should always occur first as most problems can be solved in a reasonable manner.

Accept the fact that you can’t control other people, and you can’t know the future. Set boundaries as necessary. Make positive decisions that feel comfortable to you. Try to focus on the positive.


Obviously, no one likes to live being worried all the time. Life is too short to be stressed. There are solutions to most problems, even though they don’t always appear as quickly as we would like sometimes.

Be kind to yourself by eating healthy, getting enough sleep and exercising. Exercise is a great way to help relieve stress as it produces healthy brain hormones. Watch a funny movie or go out with some enjoyable friends.

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.


Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on September 16, 2019:

Welcome to Hbpages Bernard. I have never mentored anyone but I will answer your questions to the best of my ability, and I will follow you as you write. The best way to succeed here is to write about something you know a lot about, or you may write fictional stories or poetry. Try to use good grammer, include about 3 pictures with your articles ( is a good place to get free pictures) and in addition use a video or tube from YouTube. I wish you the best of luck.

Bernardwekhoba on September 16, 2019:

Welcome Pamela. I am new here and I would like you to mentor me and show me what to do and how to do it

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on September 16, 2019:

Hi Bernard, Thank you for stoppimg by and commenting.

Bernardwekhoba on September 16, 2019:

Very educative...

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on June 11, 2019:

Hi Gupi, I agree that it is hard to change the habit of worrying. I hope you can reduce your stress, and I appreciate your comments.

Gupi on June 11, 2019:

Hi, thanks for sharing. Worrying is a very difficult habit to break. I am trying my best to reduce stress in my life.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 22, 2018:

Hi Dred,

Worrying is a hard habit to break. I worked hard to try to just live in the day. When I wrote down about 10 of my worries and put the in a container in my bedroom, then got them out a week or so later I found not 1 of those things happened. That was a turning point for me.

Thanks for your comments, and I wish you all the best.

Travel Chef from Manila on July 22, 2018:

I'm a kind of person who worry too much. As a result, I'm killing my time worrying about the future rather than working on my present. I started to improve, but I hope to continue for the best.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on June 26, 2018:

Hi Heidi, You are right, it is becoming an epidemic. It is sad, and if people would just communicate. I appreciate your comments.

Heidi Thorne from Chicago Area on June 25, 2018:

Sadly, this is such an epidemic in our world! And it can have such an impact on us physically. Ouch. Thanks for the kind reminders to be kind to ourselves!

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on April 14, 2015:

Victoria, That jar really did help me, and I used it for a few weeks. I don't worry very often anymore, thank goodness. It seems like everything usually works out for the best, just not in my time frame! Thanks for your comments.

Victoria Lynn from Arkansas, USA on April 13, 2015:

I worry too much. It's hard to let go. I do like the jar idea!

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on February 10, 2015:

Audry, That does make life much simpler. I appreciate your comments.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on February 10, 2015:

Audry, That horse saying is sure true. We are going throught that with my step-daughter right now, and if is a helpless feeling. I hope your sister will start listening to you in the near future, as misery is only an option. we can choose to be happy. Thanks for the comments and the share.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on February 10, 2015:

manatita, I am glad you enjoyed the video and hub. Thank you so much for your comments.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on February 10, 2015:

Linda, At one point in my life I didn't trust that feeling at all as I made some bad decisions. Life is so much better now and that gut feeling is always right.Thanks for your comments.

Audrey Howitt from California on February 05, 2015:

What a great article on the subject!! I love the idea of only working on one problem at a time!

Audrey Hunt from Pahrump NV on February 05, 2015:

My sister, bless her heart, is a big-time worrier. I've about given up on helping her because she doesn't want to listen to anything I have to say. I wish she would read your good hub on this subject. How does the old saying go? "You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink."

I love her so much and it hurts me that she could be happy if she simply followed the advice you give here. Voted up and sharing. Audrey

manatita44 from london on February 05, 2015:

Excellent, healthy and wholesome article with good suggestions for overcoming worry. Beautiful video.

Linda Bilyeu from Orlando, FL on February 05, 2015:

Amen, Pamela! Such great advice. I also appreciate my gut feeling, it hasn't steered me wrong yet.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on February 05, 2015:

Patricia, It worked that way for me also. I had to consciously make a choice to turn lose of things I could not control. I do appreciate your comments as always. Thanks for the angels, and I'm sending some back to you. God bless.

Patricia Scott from North Central Florida on February 05, 2015:

Learning to quit worrying has been an on going process for me. Once I realized I was missing so many precious moments by trying to control something that may never happen

My life and thinking turned around.

And worry is in my rearview mirror for the most part.

Well expressed, Pamela, as usual voted up and shared

Angels are on the way to you this morning. ps

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on August 02, 2014:

Audrey, I am so glad that you feel that way and that maybe the hub helped you. I appreciate your comments very much. Have a great weekend.

Audrey Selig from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma on July 31, 2014:

Thank you Pamela for challenging us to worry less and be healthy. I know sometimes my brain goes on overload, and it is time to slow down and enjoy life. Ideas like yours can make us all better individuals. Pamela, thank you for your own issues that you shared to make it a better hub. Your writing and examples help everyone. Sharing. Blessings, Audrey

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 20, 2014:

Diana, I think you are probably right as all these things affect us. Thanks so much for your comments.

Dianna Mendez on July 19, 2014:

Seems like worry is increasing with all the issues present in today's world. Your advice will help people to realize worry is not profitable. I like your suggestion to tackle it one by one. Good reading.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 19, 2014:

Lady Guinevere, I am glad you went for it with your book. It obviously makes you feel good about making that decision. Good for you. Thanks so much for your comments.

Debra Allen from West By God on July 18, 2014:

Yes, deal with one problem at a time. Most times if you deal with stress that way other things tend to take care of themselves. I hemmed and worried and stressed out about starting my book here on HP and was stressing over what others might do or say to me...mostly family members, but then came the thought. Most of my family members do not even read my stuff. It is my story too and then the thought came too about all of this...things happen for a reason and just maybe this is the time for it to be told. Then again maybe my dad is letting or guiding me to doing it. So I stopped stressing over it all and the fear is subsiding. You have a wonderful article here. I am going to share it.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 15, 2014:

Connie, I am glad you found this article useful. Thanks for your comments and the shares.

Connie S Owens from El Cajon, CA on July 14, 2014:

Thank you for those great tips and reminders. I tend to wallow. :) This is a great article and will be sharing it with my readers, followers, and friends.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 14, 2014:

Patty, Those are two important things to repeat and get ingrained in your thinking. It is so easy to worry about problems and it isn't an easy habit to break either. Thanks so much for your comments and the ratings.

breakfastpop on July 14, 2014:

This is a very important piece, Pamela. I can be quite the worrier, but I am learning to live each day one at a time. I keep repeating that I can't change the past and I can't predict the future. Up, useful, interesting and awesome.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 14, 2014:

Ms Dora, I'm glad you enjoyed the hub and getting out more will probably be healthy for you. Thanks for your comments.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 14, 2014:

Denise, I would think setting up a time limit would help also. Thanks for sharing that tip.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 14, 2014:

JY, We do know how the story ends. Enjoy your travels. I would love to do the same and hope to when the time is right. You're welcome.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 14, 2014:

Shaunna, i agree with you completely. Even when it looks like there isn't a solution things always have a way of working out. Thanks for your comments.

Dora Weithers from The Caribbean on July 14, 2014:

Thank you for exploring the effects and the solution to worry. Very practical. I have to try going out more. Voted Up!

Denise W Anderson from Bismarck, North Dakota on July 14, 2014:

I like the worry jar, that just might work! For me, confining worry to certain times of the day has been helpful. I tell myself, "I won't think about that until..." and I give myself a time limit. Usually, I am able to successfully procrastinate the worry until it is gone, and it no longer is troublesome to me.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 14, 2014:

Alicia, I am glad you found this hub helpful. Thanks so much for your comments.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 14, 2014:

Ruby, Congrats on your new home. I imagine you will get it organized over time, so it will be less of a worry. Meditation is a great way to relieve stress, and I probably should have written more about it in my hub. Thanks so much for your comments.

John Young from Florence, South Carolina on July 14, 2014:

Pam, doing OK, I've also learned to avoid stress and confrontation wherever possible. I'm not able to handle it anymore. But let others worry about the world situation, we know how the story ends. I'm planning to go to all the places I wanted to, but didn't have the chance. That's not many seeing I was a military brat, lol. And thanks for all your well wishes.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 14, 2014:

Jackie, You make a good point. Life is too short. I think "Just live for the day" is the best attitude. I appreciate your comments.

Shauna L Bowling from Central Florida on July 14, 2014:

Stress can really do a number on you, for sure. I try not to stress too much. There's always a solution to every problem. Once we realize that and go about implementing those solutions, we can enjoy life.

Great advice, Pamela!

Linda Crampton from British Columbia, Canada on July 13, 2014:

This is a very useful hub, Pamela. I need to take some of your advice! Thank you for sharing your tips for dealing with worry.

Ruby Jean Richert from Southern Illinois on July 13, 2014:

Boy, i sure needed this reminder today. My stress level has been on the rise since buying my new home, instead of downsizing i upsized. So much more to take care of. I made the move and i will survive, but a lesson learned. I know stress is a killer. I find when i'm stressed to the max, i meditate and that helps tremendously. You have listed some great tips. The inner reflection video was spot on. Thank you..

Jackie Lynnley from the beautiful south on July 13, 2014:

It is great to be a place in life when we can control our worries. I think we realize finally how short life is and why waste it on worries? Just live for the day. Great article. ^

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 13, 2014:

JY, I am so glad you stopped by as I don't write often enough anymore. I am glad to hear you are writing with the church. I would also say over 800. hubs is a substantial contribution. I am sorry to hear you are officially disabled, but hope you are having as full a life as possible. I wish you the best alwaysl

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 13, 2014:

manatita, Thank you so much for the kind comments as they are much appreciated,. I appreciate the share also.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 13, 2014:

Incomeguru, Yes, I fully agreee. I appreciate your comments.

John Young from Florence, South Carolina on July 13, 2014:

Hi Pam, long time no see. Great Hub as always. I no longer write hubs since I started writing for a local church. Over 800 hubs was enough. I haven't been able to write anyway, up til now. I just came out of major surgery about 2 months ago. I am now officially disabled. But I still read hubs sometimes...however I don't offer writing advice anymore. LOL. You take care sweety.

manatita44 from london on July 13, 2014:

A loving and beautifully written article with much sensitivity. I will pass this on.

Oyewole Folarin from Lagos on July 13, 2014:

Wonderful hub Pamela, well composed and well written. Being worried too much can never bring out good result but failure. Thanks for this eye opening content.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 13, 2014:

Jim, Love you sense of humor. Thanks for stopping by and commenting.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 13, 2014:

Arun, I have seen people like that in the hospital when I was working as a nurse. Some people just see doom and gloom it seems. I hope this hub does help someone. Thanks for sharing your comments.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 13, 2014:

Peggy, I think we all worry about a few things, and I agree that when it is out of control the physical factors are of concern. Thanks so much for your comments and the share.

The Frog Prince from Arlington, TX on July 13, 2014:

Nice Hub Pamela. Dang for a minute there I thought Obama might be resigning.



I met a middle-aged lady recently in a hospital. Her complaints were very high pulse beat and accompanying pressure. After a thorough medical check up the physicians could not detect any other problems except her unusual tension all the time. So your well written hub should be an eye opener to those suffering from worries for nothing. Thank you for sharing.

Peggy Woods from Houston, Texas on July 13, 2014:

I think that worrying about things is just a part of human nature to some extent. It is when it gets out of control that it becomes dangerous to our health and well being. Excellent article including tips on how to put it in perspective and deal with it. Happy to share this article all around.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 12, 2014:

Paula, I think once we are past our childrearing days life is simpler. It is nice to be at a place where everything is not such a big deal. Thanks so much for your comments and I appreciate the tweet. Have a lovely rest of the weekend.

Suzie from Carson City on July 12, 2014:

Pam....Dear me, my fine lady....everything you have shared here is so very true!! I know this is solid, common sense advice and actually have come a long way since my younger days (raising kids) when I worried about every little thing. Terrible thing to do! I LOVE the opening photo and comment about how worry steals our PEACE.

It is wonderful to finally arrive at a place when we're wise enough to put things in their proper perspective.

Great Hub...Up+++ pinned & tweeted

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 12, 2014:

Huntgoddess, I am glad this hub is helpful to you. Thanks so much for your comments.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 12, 2014:

Billy, I had a friend that use to tell me that all the time, and it is the best way. Thanks for your comments.

Pamela Oglesby (author) from Sunny Florida on July 12, 2014:

Jodah, I hate being late also and my husband is worse than I am about that. I am glad you enjoyed the hub, and I appreciate your comments.

Huntgoddess from Midwest U.S.A. on July 12, 2014:

It's like you know me.

This Hub is like a breath of fresh air. I'm keeeping a link to it, so I can use it as a reference.

Thanks so much. This is a great gift.

Bill Holland from Olympia, WA on July 12, 2014:

Good information, Pamela. I used to be a stress I'm on the other end of the spectrum...don't sweat the small stuff, and it's all small stuff. :)

John Hansen from Gondwana Land on July 12, 2014:

Wonderful hub Pamela. I have always been a worrier. For instance if my wife is running late for an appointment, I stress out, even though it isn't me. I can't stand being late for instance. I am better than I used to be. I used to stress about the future and things I have no control over, but that is changing to some extent. I've found things usually have a way of working out. Good advice here, voted up.

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