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Bipolar Disorder: The Illness of "X-Men"

Joan Elizabeth is a writer that explores mental illness/health/healing in conjunction with spirituality and Holistic living and practices.


Psychiatry, Mental Illness, Abnormal Psychology: Being an X-man

X-men are mutants that have Superpowers. A clip of one X-men movie trailer is included below so if you are unfamiliar with the Hollywood series you can "wet your beak." Mental Illness is like the mutant expression in the famous Hollywood blockbusters. The mentally ill just have to see themselves for the unique beings they truly are. Mental illness is often a disturbing life path for most individuals suffering from such chronic "ailments". Such people have to really embrace their irregularity to survive...and definitely to thrive!

I have symptomology that is EXTREME and outlandish for the average people around me. The mental health conditions are severe and they create all sorts of bizarre expressions or ABNORMAL PSYCHOLOGY---so much so that at one point in my life before people were aware...before I was aware, of my disorder, people just thought I was very "out there" or artistic or strangely intelligent.

I experienced all sorts of deep and high mood swings that caused people to think I was precocious. Or that I was eccentric!

I was very productive at first, very intense, very wild-natured to SOME. I was an overachiever and a success-oriented persona. I had no idea that these exceptional attributes would one day be so exaggerated that I would be prescribed boatloads of prescription medicines to keep me "under wraps"!

I just thought Me was Me. I thought this because early-on in human growth and development, we all have a rather egocentric perception. Eventually, most people begin to notice the world around them---if they are socially educated. I was socially aware at a very young age. But, when I was in my early adulthood, I was in college. Older people of a more "mature persuasion" were few and far between. University life was centered around two factors: Education and Social Life. So, it was a very liberal place to discover oneself. There were no real parameters to behavior and mores. Everything was wide-open. Drugs and Alcohol were easy to access and were readily available.

Like adolescence, young adulthood in such liberal environments is varied and ambiguous. It is hard to distinguish between youthful demonstrations, inappropriate behaviors, and flat out illness in the making.

Some of my exaggerated conditions that began developing in my young adulthood were circadian rhythms doused in "night owl" sleep and wake patterns (I often stayed up in my drawing, painting or printmaking studios doing art and socializing until 3-4 AM), thoughts that could not cease, writing binges that went on and on, sexuality that was uninhibited and/or promiscuous, spending that would not quit.

I have adapted to such extreme conditions/states over the course of my life. I had to learn how to step into these make them "A-OK" instead of extreme abnormalities. It has been a task. An arduous task. An X-man task.

It is easy for society to banish or isolate such "weird-isms."

In fact, psychiatric medicine and means have been criticized over the course of time. "Since the 1960’s it has been argued by anti-psychiatrists that the entire notion of abnormality or mental disorder is merely a social construction used by society. Notable anti-psychiatrists were Michel Foucault, R.D. Laing, Thomas Szasz and Franco Basaglia. Some observations made are;

  • Mental illness is a social construct created by doctors. An illness must be an objectively demonstrable biological pathology, but psychiatric disorders are not.
  • The criteria for mental illness is vague, subjective and open to misinterpretation criteria.
  • The medical profession uses various labels eg. depressed, schizophrenic to exclude those whose behavior fails to conform to society’s norms.
  • Labels and consequently treatment can be used as a form of social control and represent an abuse of power.
  • Diagnosis raises issues of medical and ethical integrity because of financial and professional links with pharmaceutical companies and insurance companies."

"Contemporary issues of anti-psychiatry include freedom versus coercion, racial and social justice...

...Psychiatrists have been trying to differentiate mental disorders based on clinical interviews since the era of Kraepelin, but now realize that their diagnostic criteria are imperfect. Tadafumi Kato writes, 'We psychiatrists should be aware that we cannot identify 'diseases' only by interviews. What we are doing now is just like trying to diagnose diabetes mellitus without measuring blood sugar.'...

...In 2013, psychiatrist Allen Frances said that 'psychiatric diagnosis still relies exclusively on fallible subjective judgments rather than objective biological tests'.

Reasons have been put forward to doubt the ontic status of mental disorders. Mental disorders engender ontological skepticism on three levels:

  1. Mental disorders are abstract entities that cannot be directly appreciated with the human senses or indirectly, as one might with macro- or microscopic objects.
  2. Mental disorders are not clearly natural processes whose detection is untarnished by the imposition of values, or human interpretation.
  3. It is unclear whether they should be conceived as abstractions that exist in the world apart from the individual persons who experience them, and thus instantiate them."

The thing about X-men is that the mutants come into full Superpower when they stop seeing themselves as mutants and they start seeing themselves as gifted and unique. This is quite the same as the mentally ill. The more people stigmatize and put down psychiatric situations and patients as wrong or bad, the more the mentally "ill" are seen as ABNORMAL and out of place in the world around them. Rather, the mentally "ill" need to very intentionally be given a rightful place in the world they live in.

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The mores in American society are currently very polarized. Attitudes of American citizens are generally black OR white. There is very little middle ground among the American people these days. This influences my life constantly. As I have been labeled ABNORMAL since 1992, I have to find my place independent of normal constraints or conservative mentalities.

I went to Sonic to grab some food with my nephew and sister-n-law the other day. My sister-n-law does not eat meat for a variety of reasons but primarily because she has a sensitive digestive system. We went through Sonic and there was nothing on the menu she could eat. We went to the adjacent fast-food restaurant Panda Express thinking there would be something she could eat. There were dishes with veggies in them so she had to buy those and take the meat out of them. I have been around vegetarians and vegans for years because I hang out with an alternative crowd of people. It struck me that "my people" were not average people in Hampton Roads, Virginia. Otherwise, there would be alternative food choices available In Chesapeake.

This is what I am addressing. There is a life outside the world of NORMAL. In fact, people have been trying to eradicate the term normal for at least a decade. There is still much work to do with our lexicon and our ideations.

When I am in a decent state of balance, I come across pretty normal. I don't stand out usually. I am very high functioning. I have spent a lifetime working to "fit in". I'll never be average. I have too many attributes that keep this from happening. I have often since childhood identified with Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer. But, usually, I do not look like a "sore thumb." Is that good? Perhaps. But, truly, as I age I get more comfortable in my oddness---my X-man persona. Here is the story of how my life became an anomaly. Enjoy!

One X-men Trailer: Embrace the Irregular, the Abnormal, the Unusual

My Initial Diagnostic Psychiatric History

I have been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder since 1992. It has been one "Rock'n'Roll High School." I was 21 when I had my first full-blown manic episode. I now have had 26+ years of official documented experience with the chronic illness.

It all started my junior year at the University of Florida, and it was brutally shocking. One moment I was a naive 21-year-old young woman and the next moment I was a literal version of Alice in Wonderland.

I had experienced depressions for years. But mania, that was all new to me! I would learn many years later that I was hypomanic the vast majority of my life. Hypomania is frequently experienced as high productivity, high energy, and high mood elevation. It is often accompanied by irritability.

Winston Churchill and Abraham Lincoln have been classified as Bipolar.

Mania is psychotic in nature. And I must say, it can be fostered if in the right set of mental conditions. That is to say, I can create a mild mania/extreme hypomania through sheer determination and hyperfocus. This type of mania is kind of right on the edge of psychosis. If the correct stimulus were to surface, it could be the "straw that broke the camel's back".

While I was at UF, I was waffling back and forth from hypomania to depression. I drank excessively. I partied a lot. My sexuality was in "high gear." My intensity was in "high gear." Everything, in fact, was in "high gear." I was a performer on all levels. And, I had no idea of the apocalypse to come! I was living from moment to moment...completely unaware of the big picture.

I was an art education major. My creativity was beginning to peak. There was no obstacle that my mind could not overcome if I channeled myself effectively and perfectionistic-ally. So, day by day I would press myself into the mold of the world...a square peg in a round hole...until, finally, one summer, I snapped like a twig and I shattered the "glass ceiling" above me.

I didn't do it by myself---by my innate biochemistry---the first time. I took a drug and anti-depressant called Prozac for my perpetual depressions and my crescendoing out of control behaviors. "Prozac is a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI). It works by blocking the absorption of the neurotransmitter serotonin in the brain. Regulating the amount of serotonin helps brain cells transmit messages to each other. This results in a better and more stable mood."

Just prior to taking Prozac, I began to place myself in precarious situations just to feel the sharp edge beckoning me to endeavor deeply into the "dark side" of life. Eventually, a relative who was a medical doctor arranged for me to go to the University psychiatrist. The doctor at UF prescribed Prozac.

Anti-depressants were frequently prescribed without mood stabilizers during that period of history. The medical community had no idea then that such drugs were catalysts for psychosis if they were not prescribed in conjunction with a mood stabilizer first---if the patient, specifically, had a medical history and/or behavioral tendency toward Bipolar Disorder.

Whoops! There I went! Flying straight through the "glass ceiling" and straight into mania...It was the craziest, scariest damn thing I had ever experienced.

For over two weeks I ran on sugar and no sleep. I partied without reason. I experienced sex with at least one random guy that I never had any interest in before that period. My actions were extremely out of control. I started a bar fight because I was in some sort of strange delusion that caused me to react hostilely toward some unknown woman in the drinking establishment. I began to have visual hallucinations. I went on a spending spree that included lots of books and lots of magic-oriented games and paraphernalia.

I was on the other side of the "Looking Glass." There would be no saving me. I was mentally ill.

I was hospitalized in the local crisis stabilization unit until my father who was experiencing financial issues at that time pulled me out and took me home with him. I was placed on lithium, Haldol and Cogentin. The summer was one rough "ride."

"The specific biochemical mechanism of lithium action in stabilizing mood is unknown. Upon ingestion, lithium becomes widely distributed in the central nervous system and interacts with a number of neurotransmitters and receptors, decreasing norepinephrine release and increasing serotonin synthesis."

Interestingly enough, Haldol is an elephant tranquilizer.

"Haloperidol (Haldol) has been used in the acute treatment of aggressive and psychotic states, Huntington's chorea and Tourette's syndrome in humans, as well as in the management of nausea and vomiting associated with chemotherapy.

Haloperidol has been used experimentally in dogs, rats and monkeys. It has been reported to assist in the control of stress and therefore to prevent injuries when several species of wild African herbivore are handled at game parks.", Kersti Seksel, in Small Animal Clinical Pharmacology (Second Edition), 2008.

"Haloperidol (Haldol) is the most studied agent for the treatment of delirium in adult ICU patients. It is a neuroleptic agent that binds to postsynaptic dopamine receptors and has strong central antidopaminergic activity. All patients should be monitored closely for extrapyramidal side effects, neuroleptic malignant syndrome, and QT prolongation, which may lead to torsades de pointes. Appropriate Haldol dosing in ICU patients is to administer doubling doses every 15–20 minutes until the patient responds, at which point the total dose administered should be divided and administered in 6-hour intervals. Some anecdotal experience and limited studies suggest that newer second-generation neuroleptics such as olanzapine and quetiapine may be as effective as haloperidol with a more beneficial adverse effect..."

"Benztropine (Cogentin) is used to treat symptoms of Parkinson's disease or involuntary movements due to the side effects of certain psychiatric drugs (antipsychotics such as chlorpromazine/haloperidol)."

During this horrible transition, I threw up from lithium toxicity. I was blinded temporarily by the Cogentin. My body began to transform from a beautiful, slender young woman into a much heavier, acne-inflicted, tremoring young woman.

My mind would never be the same again. And at 21, I heard I would have to take lithium for the rest of my life. This meant no children according to the pharmacology book my father purchased for me, and no more drinking.

How Prozac Works

How Lithium Works

How Haldol Works

How Cogentin Works

My History Before My Diagnosis

Understand that mental illness and mental health are a spectrum and they are very cyclical in nature. There is a very fine line between pathology and extreme personality attributes. A lot of what I now know was once very, very foggy and confusing. I have spent a lifetime piecing together stories and recollections. Some experiences are fragile at best. Nevertheless, I do now believe that I was born with what I term Bipolar Energies and I eventually manifest into the diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder.

I can remember being five years of age and hearing my parents fighting in the adjacent office to my bedroom. I had recently, inappropriately (which is commonplace for last-born children whose parents are too consumed and too tired to "bother" with the details of life), watched One Flew Over a Cuckoo's Nest. I saw a scene where one of the patients was smothered to death with a pillow. Laying in my bed as that five-year-old, feeling horrible amounts of fear and frustration, I attempted to smother myself in order to escape the pain I was feeling from my parents' fight. Of course, I was unsuccessful. A five-year-old has no know-how about smothering him/herself. Nevertheless, looking back, it is evidence of a negative tendency that would later blossom into something far much more epic in nature.

There is a photo shoot of my family of origin that was taken when I was approximately three years of age. It is quite ironic because it displays me in four oval window frames as moody. I was perched in my home puffing out my lip, looking out in wonder, and generally contemplating life as I saw and knew it at that time. It cracks me up to this day! What a snip-it and a photographic montage of prophetic foreshadowing!

I was a pretty happy kid overall. I was kind of shy in the earlier years during certain situations. I was very creative. I was sensitive. I was, also, acutely aware of masculine energies and personas. At some point, I became a fusion of masculine and feminine qualities...emotionally and mentally.

But, I was also a product of a broken home. My parents split the first time when I was around four and a half. My mother took us from our house in Newton, North Carolina to our new residence in her hometown of Salina, Kansas. It was an abrupt and stress-filled transfer. It was, also, a culture shock.

I, also, was the youngest child of four children and the only girl. I got pummeled a lot. My brothers were very energetic beings and they were swimming in testosterone. I, unfortunately, was swimming in estrogen and progesterone and only a tad of testosterone. I wouldn't fully realize this for decades. I thought I was the same kind of being that my brothers were.

Surprise! Nope. I was the "Ugly Duckling."

Around 10 years of age, I began to go through puberty. My chest developed before my periods commenced. At 11, my periods began and I would, years later, learn I suffered from Dysmenorrhea. I often had extended cycles that resulted in me vomiting. It was challenging to say the least! I was my full height of 5'7" in sixth grade. Furthermore, I experienced a knee injury between fourth and fifth grade that was as a result of my tremendous growth spurts and it hindered my confidence and my physical expression and/or exercise a lot. My hormonal fluxes were always difficult to manage, and they were truly a mystery to me most of my young life.

I have tracked the fact that every hospitalization I have had---minus the very last manic episode in January 2019---was during my menstrual cycle. This means my periods are a catalyst for emotional psychiatric imbalance. Average women often suffer from Pre-Menstrual Syndrome or PMS that is know for its extreme behavioral modification issues. My PMS creates a landscape for hospitalizations.

I went from having two to three really good male friends, a best female friend, and multiple other friends to struggling with boys a lot by the time I hit junior high. And I had no idea why!!! I had no idea that my height and my assertive/aggressive persona was generating power struggles throughout my life. It was hard for me in many different ways, but it was especially hard for my emotional body development. And then my home broke again. My father left Salina and my mother for good. I began experiencing a pervasive sadness from time to time. In my eighth-grade-year, my best female friend of six years nearly died three different times because of an acute illness.

I was a jumbled mess inside my bodymind.

By 14 years of age, I was experiencing real depression. At 17, I tried to kill myself with an overdose of mainly over-the-counter medication and one or two prescribed medications.

I went to a psychologist one-three times and stopped because the counselor reminded me of my mother.

By 17.5, I moved to Gulf Breeze, Florida to live with my father and his new wife because my mother and I had a major falling out. At some point after the move, I went through a series of several mood swings and I attempted to go to a psychiatrist for my depression and my emotional issues. I slept a lot during this period to cope with my depression.

I was temporarily put on Pamelor but only for a short period of time. "This medication is used to treat mental/mood problems such as depression. It may help improve mood and feelings of well-being, relieve anxiety and tension, and increase your energy level. This medication belongs to a class of medications called tricyclic antidepressants. It works by affecting the balance of certain natural chemicals (neurotransmitters) in the brain."

I was, also, socially drinking a lot...every weekend for the most part of my senior year in high school. I smoked pot occasionally as well. Twice I tried ecstasy. What a disaster that was both times! It made me very, very angry and aggressive.

I graduated from high school in June 1989. My drinking continued to be excessive. My sexuality was a "mixed bag of tricks" as I was known as "V" (virgin) my senior year of high school. Some envious female classmates that had been sexually active since junior high thought that it would be funny to say, "Joan V? Baxter" on the back of our senior class t-shirt. I had mistakenly announced while I was drunk one night at a party in the fall of 1988 that I was "waiting"/abstaining for marriage. This abstinence became a challenge/target/joke for nearly everybody in my class. I felt that pressure from the fall of 1988 to the summer of 1989. It was a lot for a teenage girl with raging hormones and emotional stressors of extreme levels to endure.

By the time I went to UF in the fall of 1989, I was thoroughly confused about how to handle my blooming sexuality that was supercharged with Bipolar energies. I eventually "went off the deep end" and I became promiscuous. I would later understand that I was hypersexual due to the disorder expanding in me.

"It is not unusual for people to experience a heightened sense of sexuality during a manic episode. In and of itself, this is not a problem. It is when it is paired with impulsivity, risk-taking, poor judgment, and expansiveness—all features of bipolar mania—that hypersexuality can be destructive.

When the pursuit of sex becomes compulsive, it may even be classified as a sex addiction. While the classification is still considered controversial, a person is said to have an addiction when he or she spends inordinate amounts of time in sexual-related activity to the point where important social, occupational, or recreational activities are neglected."

It is interesting that two of my college boyfriends grew up to be sex addicts. I had a brief reunion with both of them in my early and mid thirties. Both of them were highly successful in their careers; but, their sexuality was in the domain of addiction to say the least!

"I didn’t try to control the (mental illness) behavior because I didn’t know it was mania and I certainly didn’t know that I was ill.

For those who are new to bipolar disorder lingo, there are two main mood swings in the illness. Depression and mania. Within mania, there are two levels of mania, hypomania and full-blown mania. People with bipolar two, like myself, have depression and hypomania. People with bipolar one have depression, hypomania and full-blown mania. In my experience, the symptoms of mania are the same between hypomania and full-blown mania, the main difference is intensity. Hypomania can be very, very destructive and can’t be taken lightly. And just to complicate things even more, there are also two types of mania, euphoric and dysphoric."

How Pamelor Works

What Mania Looks Like, Feels Like, Is Like...

People have asked me, "What does mania feel like?"

It feels like "a speed and an LSD" trip that goes on for 2-3 weeks. I never experimented with LSD when I was young. But, many people I knew/know did. And they would describe such drug-induced states to me after the fact. I have only seen movies and TV shows about people on speed. I have experienced caffeine on multiple levels.

Imagine to my surprise, that at 21, I would go into such a state without LSD or speed.

For me, it begins by not sleeping...for days.

Then it is like a rush of unending adrenaline that forces me into hyper states/conditions. I can't get enough of anything! Everything is super, super, super intense. I eventually, begin having grandiose ideations. I connect with my extra-sensory perceptions profoundly. This can cause grandiose and sometimes distorted auditory and visual experiences. I explain it this WAY because, over the last 26+ years, I have learned a lot about life. I incorporate aspects of life that Western medicine/medication denies or is inexperienced with.

Western medicine does not incorporate the spiritual, energetic, or psychic realms. It denies whole aspects of the human experience. It egotistically claims total overall evidence-based comprehension and mastery of the human body and mind.

In other words, it is fallible and incomplete.

It is especially fallible in the category of Behavioral Health! Why? Because first and foremost, the brain is just a receptor and transmitter. It is NOT the control center. Rather it is a servant, not the master. The human bodymind is far greater than the Western healthcare community conceives.

I discovered this through my gateway to the East. I first explored yoga and massage. Eventually, I explored acupuncture. Then I opened to a whole new world including restorative therapies, Tantra, and craniosacral therapy.

I have been in a spiritual community since birth. I was inducted into Christianity metaphysically when I was an infant. This induction is known in the Lutheran world as Baptism or Christening. This is NOT an intellectual "hoo-ha." This is a living act. It is a metaphysical, sacred ritual of Christendom.

All religions and spiritual expressions incorporate such metaphysical and sacred rituals. I discovered this from an ex-boyfriend that I dated for 3.5 years following a spiritual phase I categorize as my "High Christian" era. He was a very knowledgable, experienced Pagan that practiced all sorts of psychic-oriented magickal perspectives.

"Pagan, Noun.: A person holding religious beliefs other than those of the main world religions.synonyms: heathen, infidel, idolater/idolatress, atheist, nontheist, irreligious person, agnostic, skeptic, heretic, apostate; archaic paynim"

Briefly: My spiritual path has been diverse. It has often been an immersion course in various belief systems and/or religions or spiritual expressions. I classify myself as a Syncretist. I cyclically and intuitively blend belief systems. I was a practicing Christian from ages infancy to 30. I was a Christian missionary to Hong Kong from 27 to 28. I was in the "Dark Night of My Soul" from 30 to 32. I embraced alternative belief systems from 32 to 46. I am a Unity practitioner and have been since 47. I am now 48. I attend Unity Renaissance in Chesapeake, Virginia.

I am now Christ-Centered and I explore all venues of Christ-Consciousness. Jesus Christ is my mentor, God and Wayshower.

Many members and/or Unity practitioners experience Jesus differently and diversely. "Unity is a positive, practical, progressive approach to Christianity based on the teachings of Jesus and the power of prayer. Unity honors the essential truths that underlie all religions and respects each individual’s right to choose a spiritual path."

Mania is a metaphysical experience as well as a medical experience. We are BODY-MIND-SPIRIT-SOUL-ENERGY not just a physical body and mind. Mania is a spiritual expression, an energetic expression, and a physical expression.

"The (PHYSICAL AND MEDICAL) problem is that for someone with bipolar disorder, hypomania can evolve into mania. Or it can switch to serious depression. And you can’t tell which one might happen, because the pattern isn’t predictable."

"A physical body-mind may have:

Five years ago, from a different Hubpages account, I wrote: Bipolar Energies vs. Bipolar Disorder: Living with a Body Pumped Full of Power

I was blogging a lot during that phase of my growth and development. This particular Hub was a thesis statement for my informal studies in Spirituality, Mental and Emotional and Physical Health, and Personal studies. It directly preceded my need to apply for SSA Disability because of a really difficult health period. The Hub is crafted ok but the ending is rather abrupt. The editing is rather poor. And, the thoughts need more development. Nevertheless, it is a good foundation of understanding regarding Holistic medicine/health/healing and Bipolar Energies vs. Bipolar Disorder.

Holistic Living: Healing, Healthcare and Medicine

Holistic Living is very distinct. It does not work like Eastern or Western medicine particularly. It does, however, encompass a lot of Eastern philosophies and techniques. But! It is much more than either Eastern or Western medicine. Its roots are wholism. Therefore it addresses Body-Mind-Spirit-Soul-Energetics.

In fact, it encompasses a lot of Quantum Physics Theory and Practice. It does not incorporate Newtonian Physics per se. It blends spirituality, physicality and science.

It addresses LIFE: The before, during, and after as ONE. Past, present, and future as inseparable.

Unity/Oneness is implicit. Multidimensionality is inherent. The third dimension is experienced as an Illusion or Maya. It is condensed vibrational energy as the Material World experience. The fourth dimension is experienced as a transition from Illusion to Higher Consciousness. The fifth dimension is experienced as the actualization of Love, Compassion, Peace and Spiritual Wisdom. This expansion of dimensionality is Infinite and it includes the first and second dimensions as well.

Much of Holistic Living involves nutrition, energy, spirituality, soul retrieval, body works including exercise/movement and restorative therapies such as massage and reflexology.

It also focuses on soul work and awakenings.

The spirit merges with Spirit. I call Spirit the Holy Spirit. Many do not. And many have a much less HOLY explanation of Spirit.

The Arts are fundamental to Holistic Living and they expand into metaphysical and magickal components for many. Music, drawing, painting, printmaking, pottery, sculpture, performance, and art "happenings" are some of the Arts of Humanity. So too are the Language Arts. But the Arts are fifth dimensional in nature as well. Extra Sensory Perception is part of the Arts.

All people have giftings. Most people have more than the declared five senses of touch, taste, hearing, vision, and smell. The psychic realm employs what they call clairs: Clairvoyance, Clairaudience, Claircognizance, Clairsentience, Clairtangency, Clairempathy Clairgustance, and Clairsalience.

These clairs are clear seeing, hearing, knowing, sensing, touching, empathy, tasting, and smelling. They are heightened and highly sensitive experiences that enable people to explore the world far beyond the physical realm.

They are nothing to be afraid of.

Most children are very tapped into this invisible ("imaginary") realm. They learn not to use their ESP because of family mores, religious training, or worldly overviews. This is unfortunate because these are innate abilities and damaging such channels of "information assessment" can damage a person for a lifetime. It is kindred to the period where left-handed people were forbidden to write with their left hands and this caused the left-handers issues with their ability to read, etc.

The spiritual and energetic realms are a part of real life. We DO NOT have to die to experience the spiritual realm. The spiritual exists in the here and now! During my twenties, I belonged to a charismatic evangelical Presbyterian church for approximately seven years. This church practiced their faith in conjunction with the gifts of the Holy Spirit. Today, I practice my life in conjunction with what I learned during that phase of my development but I, also, have reached outside that church's confines into a greater understanding of the spiritual realm.

I know the spiritual and physical realms simultaneously. I have learned the energetic realm as well. This took time and experience. I, initially, learned energetics through a course called Energetic Transformations. At first, I thought the whole situation was like "The Emperor's New Clothes." Everything seemed imaginary---a bunch of "Hooda guru"!!!

I was in the course with 25 advanced energy healers of varying backgrounds and abilities. I felt nothing, saw nothing, heard nothing. I was just there...experiencing an invisible and out of touch world of the imaginary. It was awful. I almost walked away from the class empty-handed. But right at the end of the course, I was paired with two healers that only wanted to work with one another. I felt even more stupid/foolish. Nevertheless, they were the people and the trigger that woke me up to the invisible realm of energy.

I was assigned the task of working with one of the women's hara. So, I began. I quickly moved my hands down the invisible structure outside the woman's bodymind. Suddenly, the woman started freaking out and saying that I was hurting her, and to go much slower. I freaked out!

"How could this be?" I thought. "I am not doing ANYTHING." But, I was. This is quite a long story; but, suffice it to say, over the next few weeks I would come to understand that invisible does not mean nothing. Energy is vibrational in nature. Albert Einstein knew this during World War II. It is how he fathomed the atomic bomb that blew up two Japanese cities!

Historical and Religious Factors that Play into My Holistic Living

Nikola Tesla, an engineer, lived 1856-1943 just prior to the explosion of the atomic bomb. Tesla studied under Thomas Edison. Tesla is known for his early breakthroughs in technology and energy. "In the late 19th century, Tesla patented the Tesla coil, which laid the foundation for wireless technologies and is still used in radio technology today...Tesla himself used his coil to study fluorescence, x-rays, radio, wireless power and electromagnetism in the earth and its atmosphere...

...Having become obsessed with the wireless transmission of energy, around 1900 Tesla set to work on his boldest project yet: to build a global, wireless communication system — to be transmitted through a large electrical tower — for sharing information and providing free energy throughout the world."

It is not exactly known how Tesla failed. There are many theories about him and his eccentric life. Nevertheless, his free energy project ultimately came to an end and Tesla is said to have died penniless and exhibiting forms of mental illness such as Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Some even think he may have been a high functioning autistic. Regardless, he made great strides in helping the world to understand energy.

"Science reveals that everything in the manifest universe is ultimately composed of packets of energy; quantized units vibrating at specific frequencies. Quantum physicists have shown that, although matter may appear to be solid, when you look at it through a high-powered microscope so that it is broken down into its smallest components: molecules, atoms, neutrons, electrons and quanta (the smallest particles measurable), it is ultimately mostly empty space interspersed with energy. So, in essence, everything is comprised of energy and empty space. Everything that appears solid is the frequency of the vibration of the energy that makes it up. An interesting fact about this is that the denser the object, the higher the speed of vibration. At the same time, the lower the density of an object is, the lower the speed of vibration."

"The universe operates according to laws: Some Immutable Laws are Divine Oneness, Vibration, Action, Correspondence, Cause and Effect, Compensation, Attraction, Perpetual Transmutation of Energy, Relativity, Polarity, Rhythm, and Gender."

Pagan groups such as Wicca and Witchcraft employ something called The Craft, a formulation of spiritual and physical laws as well as imagination and creativity and energy workings. It can come in the expressions of Dark or Light Magick.

The Craft is often known for its wicked expressions and controlling, destructive behavior so it is often thought of as Evil. There are many schools of thought regarding these practices. What I can say from my perspective, is that first, the HEBREW Bible ("Also called the Tanakh ((/tɑːˈnɑːx/; תַּנַ״ךְ, pronounced [taˈnaχ] or [təˈnax]; also Tenakh, Tenak, Tanach)) or Mikra, is the canonical collection of Jewish texts, which is also the textual source for the Christian Old Testament.") is very specific about EVIL.

That particular Bible is very particular and is often misquoted and/or misused. Evil practices in its context are in relationship to a cult following an entity called Baal. Baal was into cannibalism and some very distinct destructive practices.

Second, the historical make-up of Western Scriptures is initially oral, then the written language of the Old Testament was Hebrew, and then the New Testament was in two different written languages of Aramaic and Greek.

Oral traditions are "Material passed on from generation to generation by word of mouth. There was a long process of gestation before books of the Old Testament reached their final written form. In ancient Israel pieces of poetry, stories of heroes, legends about founding figures, and songs of celebration circulated amongst groups and tribes. Repeatedly accounts of the momentous events of the Exodus and the wilderness journeys were transmitted to descendants and these were followed later by accounts of the early kings and the prophets; they all gathered embellishments and reinterpretations in the process. Then written collections were assembled—of laws, of prophetic utterances, stories about particular individuals. These writings, in turn, became the raw material for the recognizable written sources which can now be identified in the Pentateuch. Some modern scholars, especially in Scandinavia, where comparisons have been made with the Norse epics, have argued for a very long period of oral tradition; but it is more usually held that written sources go back to about the 10th century, BCE."

Some of the New Testament books are considered to be oral traditions as well. If you read the previous link's material, you can ascertain which books they are.

Language is generally active or living. Latin is an example of a dead language. There are many translations in print because the Western books called the Bible have "room" for interpretation. People who are multilingual understand the concept of "language that does not translate". Some words and/or phrases only exist in one of the languages because only that particular culture exhibits such a phenomenon or activity or utterance.

Third, before the eight books titled BIBLE came into play, folk society was contrived of a synthesis of medicine, magick, science, and religion. There was NO SEPARATION from these topics/knowledge-bases/practices. Everything was indeed ONE. The eight groups of people that created Western-made-Scriptures (and Eastern Orthodox Scriptures) all have different cannons or legalized holy writings that have determined how people must function and abide by spiritual laws. "These canons have developed through debate and agreement on the part of the religious authorities of their respective faiths and denominations."

Fourth, Scriptures are not limited to Judeo-Christian canonical works. There are the Essene Gospels stemming from the Dead Sea Scrolls, the Nag Hammadi texts also called the Gnostic Gospels, The Gospel of the Beloved, etc. This list is not considered all-inclusive.

"The Essenes have gained fame in modern times as a result of the discovery of an extensive group of religious documents known as the Dead Sea Scrolls, which are commonly believed to be the Essenes' library. These documents preserve multiple copies of parts of the Hebrew Bible untouched from possibly as early as 300 BCE until their discovery in 1946. Most scholars dispute the notion that the Essenes wrote the Dead Sea Scrolls. Rachel Elior questions even the existence of the Essenes."

"It was in 1928 that Edmond Bordeaux Szekely (pronounced Say-Kay) first published his translation of The Essene Gospel of Peace, an ancient manuscript discovered in the secret archives of the Vatican as the result of limitless patience, faultless scholarship, and unerring intuition...The English version first appeared in 1937 representing yet another fragment of the complete manuscript which exists in Aramaic in the secret archives of the Vatican and in old Slavonic in the Royal Library of the Habsburgs (now the property of the Austrian government). The poetic style of the translator brings to vivid reality the exquisitely beautiful words of Jesus and the Elders of the Essene Brotherhood. Liberated from the secret archives of the Vatican, these sacred scrolls are testaments to the eternal and living truth of the Way."

The following article is a long historical explanation regarding the Gnostic Gospels:

"Many of the Nag Hammadi texts make reference to Judaism, in some cases with a violent rejection of the Jewish God. Gershom Scholem once described Gnosticism as "the Greatest case of metaphysical anti-Semitism". Professor Steven Bayme said Gnosticism would be better characterized as anti-Judaism. Recent research into the origins of Gnosticism shows a strong Jewish influence, particularly from Hekhalot literature."

"The Gospel of the Beloved Companion is the first English translation of a previously unpublished first-century gospel of the same name. Originally written in Alexandrian Greek, and brought from Egypt to the Languedoc during the early to middle part of the first century, this exceptional manuscript has been preserved within the author's spiritual community since that period. In this extraordinary book, the Gospel of the Beloved Companion comes alive to bring us a luminously poetic yet starkly objective insight into, and perhaps a new perspective on, the teachings and philosophy of one of the greatest spiritual teachers the world has ever known."

Fifth, Biblical studies going back to the Abrahamic Religions of Judaica, Christendom, and Islam have varying Scriptures depicting Magick/Magic. '...(Many) people reading this will know that adding the k to magic is not merely an affectation. Rather, it is a way to discriminate between the entertainment known for pulling rabbits out of hats (magic) and techniques for harnessing internal and external energies that will help us change ourselves and our environment (magick)."

King Solomon, son of King David of Judeo-Christianity, was an expert in Magick. He was known for his wisdom and his foreigner wives and loves.

His Temple depicted/described in the Old Testament/Tanakh of Judeo-Christianity was designed by God. The God of the Holy Trinity in Judeo-Christianity. This temple housed the Ark of the Covenant. It was kept within the physical Holy of Holies. Only the holiest of priests who wore a breastplate of crystals ( which spiritually, metaphorically, and energetically represented the 12 tribes of Judaica, could enter the Holy of Holies. Any intruder of lesser holiness would be struck dead.

"Originally, the firstborn sons were to have been the priests of the Jewish nation, who would serve in the Tabernacle and in the Temple and be the spiritual leaders. When G‑d spared the Jewish firstborn during the Plague of the Firstborn in Egypt, He 'acquired' them and designated them for this special role.

After the giving of the Torah on Mount Sinai, the Jewish people made and worshipped a golden calf. Click here to read the entire story. The only tribe that did not participate in this shameful act was the tribe of Levi. At this time, the firstborn lost their special status, and it was transferred to the Levites."

Solomon's magickal wisdom has been recorded in the Occult Studies.

Occult is defined as: "Noun;; Supernatural, mystical, or magical beliefs, practices, or phenomena.'a secret society to study alchemy and the occult';; Synonyms:the supernatural, the paranormal, supernaturalism, magic, black magic, witchcraft, sorcery, necromancy, wizardry, the black arts, Kabbalah, cabbalism, occultism, diabolism, devil worship, devilry, voodoo, hoodoo, white magic, witchery, witching, orenda, mysticism..."

Going back further into the Old Testament/Tanakh, Moses was trained in Egyptian Magick as he was raised by the Pharoah. He succeeded in freeing the Israelites, his people by birth, because not only was he well-versed in Occult studies, he employed the power of the Jehovah. When he went up against the magicians of Egypt, he had a Higher Power guiding him and working through him.

Divination is forbidden in a lot of patriarchal religions like Christendom and Judaica. However, that is odd because Judeo-Christian Scripture supports the Urim and Thummim ("In the Hebrew Bible, the Urim and the Thummim(Hebrew: הָאוּרִים וְהַתֻּמִּים, Standard ha-Urim veha-Tummim Tiberian hāʾÛrîm wəhatTummîm; meaning uncertain, possibly "Lights and Perfections") are elements of the hoshen, the breastplate worn by the High Priest attached to the ephod."

These were for lack of a better phrase, Divination elements (similar to Runes and the I Ching and the Tarot) used by the Hebrew priests to communicate with Yahweh (Often seen written YHWH in Judaism because God's name was considered too sacred to be spoken so the vowel sounds are really a mystery) during the Old Testament/Tanakh.

In that time period, the Hebrews had no physical incarnation (e.g., Jesus) of the Divine. They only had physical representations or theophanies (A Greek word meaning "God appearance.") such as a cloud of fire or a burning bush, etc. They had to go through alternative channels to communicate with God. The Levites were the vessel for that channel.

The Israelites' 40 years in the wilderness was all about establishing a concrete relationship with God. It truly centered around faith before physicality.

The 10 Commandments were the first concrete sets of laws given by the Judeo-Christian Divinity. Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, and Deuteronomy were the Mosaic laws of the Torah/Old Testament. This is known as Pentateuch in Judaism. It's a Greek term meaning "five scrolls" and according to Jewish tradition, it was recorded by Moses after Mt. Sinai.

Diverging a bit so I can move this information along, Christ-Consciousness is the medium/phenomenon/channel of New Age practitioners. New Age is defined as, "Noun;; a broad movement characterized by alternative approaches to traditional Western culture, with an interest in spirituality, mysticism, holism, and environmentalism."

I don't consider myself a New Ager. I am, as I said earlier, a Syncretist. I practice a faith centered around Jesus Christ. I am a well-educated, scholarly woman who during my Christian missionary days to Hong Kong was required to teach Protestant Bible Doctrine to 10th graders. I had a 7th grader in my art classes that would come into my planning period every day (which was his lunch period) to argue Catholic Bible Doctrine. I learned a lot that I was absolutely "clueless" about prior to my missionary experience.

I have incorporated Christ-Consciousness as I have ascended into Higher Dimensional experiences.

I believe in Jesus of Nazareth, the Begotten Son of God born of the Holy Virgin, an expression of Shekinah. Jesus is not a literature-oriented perception for me. He is live to me. I have experienced His life mystically, metaphysically, and liturgically.

"The Shekhinah (Biblical Hebrew: שכינה‎ šekīnah; also Romanized Shekina(h), Schechina(h), Shechina(h)) is the English transliteration of a Hebrew word meaning "dwelling" or "settling" and denotes the dwelling or settling of the divine presence of God."

"Shekinah" in Hebrew is a feminine noun, It is interesting that Isaiah refers to the Shekinah using feminine pronouns. Especially in Isaiah 51. Particularly in Isaiah 51: 9 and 10 and its context the pronouns are feminine. In verse 10 the King James Version (KJV) uses thou and it to refer to the Shekinah. Both pronouns are feminine in Hebrew."

Shekinah is also interchangeable with some aspects of the Tree of Life, a concept originating in the Old Testament/Torah of the book of Genesis in a garden called Eden. "There is another aspect to the Feminine that is central to [Jewish Mysticism] Kabbalistic teachings and is best described through the pattern of the Tree of Life. On this Tree of Life, there are three pillars, the Pillar of Force (usually depicted on the Right), the Pillar of Form (usually depicted on the Left), and the Pillar of Balance (the middle pillar). The Pillar of Force is traditionally seen as the Masculine energy, with Chokmah, the Divine Father, Sol, at its top. This pillar deals with expansion, limitless flow of energy, generosity, force, initiative, potency, and movement. The Pillar of Form, on the other hand, is usually ascribed to the Feminine energy, with Binah, the Divine Mother, Luna, at its top. This pillar deals with contraction, limitation, containment, form, crystallization, receptivity, stillness, patience, and discipline, all of which reflects the functions of the Shekinah in the first act of creation."

I believe that Jesus of Nazareth was damned by Pontious Pilate, was crucified, died and was buried. I believe He descended into Hell (which was abolished during this process) for three days and He was resurrected. I believe He ascended into Heaven (a place of dimension and frequency).

Five years ago, I wrote the Hub: Heaven and Reincarnation: Can they co-exist??? Again, this Hub is old and it is not well-crafted. It needs to be edited and the thoughts are foundational. They are incomplete.

I believe that God is both masculine and feminine. There is Scriptural evidence for this position. The patriarchal culture so many religions profess to believe in came about through blood-shed. It did not manifest DIRECTLY from God.

I believe in Eastern philosophies/religions. I have practiced yoga and Tantra to some degree both conceptually and physically. I believe in Buddhist philosophies. I believe in Hindu philosophies. I practice reincarnation beliefs with a Western emphasis.

These BELIEFS are not inherent to Holistic Living. They are beliefs formulated by me as I have embraced Holistic Living. Others who practice Holistic Living believe other things and they practice other things.

The Jesuits of Catholicism, the founding religion and practice of Christendom as created by Emperor Constantine in Constantinople in approximately 330 A.D., philosophized about reincarnation. About 10 years ago, I had written evidence that some Jesuits actually practiced reincarnation. I had names, times and locations. The Internet has since been flooded by Christian and/or Catholic Christian sources so that when I plug in research queries for Jesuits and reincarnation I get contrary information by those Christian sources. Therefore, if there is evidence regarding Jesuits practicing reincarnation, the query must be very specific in order to pull it up. I did not save my written Internet evidence because I had no idea I would need it in the future.

Jesuits are defined as, "Members of the Society of Jesus (S.J.), a Roman Catholic order of religious men founded by St. Ignatius of Loyola, noted for its educational, missionary, and charitable works."

"In the first half of the seventeenth century, the French Catholic church was very much under the influence of the Jesuit religious order and its widely popular evangelization efforts. The Jesuit strategy was enormously successful in these years, but in the minds of many devout Catholics, Jesuit success came at the expense of key doctrines of the church."

"The issue of free will and predestination also played a key role in the series of disputes that occurred between the Jansenists, followers of the Flemish Catholic theologian Cornelius Jansen (1585–1638) and members of the Jesuit order."

You can study the Jesuits missionary work to Brazil to understand how Jesuits blended with their converts in order to create REACH.

"The global study of empires analyzes the transmission of culture, of which religion is one aspect. Expansion transferred European cultures and concerns overseas and indigenous civilization to Europe. Christianity in China, Japan, and India, which have been well studied, looked quite different from Latin America, as the Jesuits sought to penetrate deeply, sympathize with, and negotiate with Asian cultures. They often began through converting lords, local rulers, or lower-rank officials. As Brazil had no indigenous rulers, the Jesuits sought a strategy from the bottom up, like in parts of China where they made converts among some peasants and artisans.15 Ananya Chakravarti puts Jesuit missions and empire studies together with her comparative study of Jesuits in Brazil and India and with her attention to the local and the global.16..." "...In the past, Jesuit studies tended to focus on the Jesuits as an entity in themselves rather than on the Jesuits’ relations with the world. Martyrdom and the potential of sainthood of Anchieta and António Vieira (1608–97) are examples par excellence. However, the fourth exercise in St. Ignatius’s Spiritual Exercises called on the Jesuits to go out into the world and do the work of God. The Jesuits found themselves acting as scientists, doctors, healers, administrators, and advisors to kings and viceroys around the world. Recently, historians are writing about how Jesuits interacted with people that comprised their spheres of influence—indigenous peoples, African slaves, other Europeans, and Protestants."

It is philosophized that Jesuits pondered and may have employed reincarnation theories from the Greek to evangelize their converts. One such Greek example involving reincarnation was the Pythagorean Cult.

"When it came to their philosophical beliefs, the Pythagoreans were extremely superstitious and mystical. They believed that the human soul was trapped in a continuous cycle of death and reincarnation. It was taught that the only way to free ourselves from this cycle was to obtain a higher understanding of the universe through introspective thought and philosophical study...All in all, they were a mystical society that placed great importance on the mathematical relations of the universe. There is no denying that they contributed greatly to the area of mathematics and philosophy. One needs only to reflect on the Pythagorean theorem, a mathematical principle said to have been discovered by Pythagoras himself, to appreciate the profound impact they had on the development of scientific thought...Were they a cult? Perhaps. They certainly had all the usual symptoms of being a cult. After living according to their ways for some time, it is believed that the Pythagoreans attempted to pressure the ordinary citizens of Crotona into adopting their unique lifestyle. This, rather, unfortunately, did not end well for the Pythagoreans...After there initial destruction, it is possible that they simply faded away, leaving behind their rather perplexing legacy of mathematical genius tempered with mysticism and superstition."

"Judaism (also) began to adopt a transcendental view of history and the meaning of human existence, and at the same time to view the soul as existing on a spiritual plane. It began, too, to speak of the soul remaining beyond the demise of the body, and of a spiritual life beginning prior to material existence...the rabbinic view of the soul as an entity having a spiritual character and as a fixed, defined metaphysical element almost certainly developed under the influence of Orphic and Platonic Greek thought. We may assume, too, that the Greek view of the soul as belonging to the realm of the divine, infinite, and eternal, and the body to the realm of the material, finite, and mortal, also left its mark upon Jewish thought."

"The Jewish doctrine of the soul, however, did not remain within the confines of the Greek schools of thought and their view of the soul as being essentially a philosophical problem. The philosophical concepts it had acquired regarding the spiritual hierarchy of the universe and questions bound up with the conception of the soul underwent a mythical‑Gnostic transformation in the twelfth century when they encountered the early kabbalah and the Sefer ha‑Bahir."

Nikola Tesla: Energy, Vibration, Frequency

Holistic Living: Oneness, Reincarnation, and How the Soul Differs from the Spirit

Holistic Living is about Oneness. It is an awareness that all of LIFE is energy. And all of life is rooted from or originates from Source/God/Divinity/LOVE. It shows that the material world and human beings are condensed vibrations or matter. It explains that energy is never destroyed but merely transformed.

Therefore, reincarnation is an expression of such unending transformational energy. One life goes from "body and mind" to "death" to "spiritual existence only" to "rebirth as a new body and mind." Many religions say the first three aspects of life but stop at rebirth in the physical realm. I say, "Follow the money. Follow power struggles. Follow the control of the masses."

The soul is discarnate. It is not matter. It does not die. It is not destroyed. It transfers from "bodymind" to "bodymind" to "bodymind" carrying with it spiritual properties.

Spirit and Soul are not the same.

“For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.” Hebrews 4:12.

"You consist of spirit and soul and body.” – The Apostle Paul, 1 Thessalonians 5:23

Helen Blavatsky is a 19th century theosophist. She described her take on the spirit and soul as, "Just as a multitude of sparks are sent forth from a blazing fire, so countless 'sparks' of the one Supreme Spirit were sent forth into this manifested universe an immeasurably long time ago and will eventually return to the One...The soul, unlike the spirit, is an individual thing. It is a permanent entity (after it has been unfolded out of the spirit) and is the self-conscious individuality or Ego which incarnates and reincarnates in the human kingdom and beyond...We should not make the mistake of thinking that the mind and the brain are the same things because they are not. The brain is simply a physical organ and the mind is the individual soul which thinks and expresses itself through, and with the aid of, that organ. We have a different brain in each lifetime because we have a different physical body each lifetime but the mind is the same each time. The mind/soul can never express itself in its fullness and entirety in one of its incarnations. It can only express itself partially and the extent to which it does so is determined by its Karma and level of evolution and development."

One holistic practitioner I know describes it as the soul is an expression of the individual with all its individualities throughout all times and dimensions and the spirit is more the life force, the chi or prana which is a bigger expression of Spirit. He equated the life force to The Force in sci-fi movies like Star Wars.

"Past life regression is a form of guided hypnotherapy that appears to elicit memories relating to previous lives. In a large number of documented cases, subjects have recalled characteristics appropriate to the life they are recalling (when these are known), and the period in which it occurred, in surprising detail, and apparently far beyond their conscious knowledge. In combination, the obscurity of the information, realistic presentation of character and emotional identification on the part of the subject have convinced many people of the reality of reincarnation."

"Therapist Carol Bowman claimed that the therapeutic benefits of past life regression are:

see personal relationships in a new light

energize talents and abilities from the past

release fears and anxieties linked to past life traumas

release past life traumas at the root of physical problems

experience the transitional states of death and beyond

understand and align with life purpose.

Psychiatrist James Paul Pandarakalam points out that patients with neuroses may gain immediate relief when they are able to recall a traumatic effect that first caused it.

He suggests this can occur as a result of past life regression, but warns against reliance on this method, which may be counterproductive, since memories of tragic events can be overwhelming."

There are other modalities to tap the multidimensional incarnation information. I use cards with UNIVERSAL and/or Jungian (Carl Jung) images to help me channel psychic "downloads" of such information. Many holistic energy healers use psychic "downloads" that process through their hands to their clients' sphere of recognition.

Many energy healers know they are channeling from a Higher source (e.g., Ascended Masters, Angels, and people who are discarnate or "on the Other Side", or Source/God/Divinity Itself) or Spirit while their clients are unaware.

People should question their healers about the healers' modalities if there is cause for confusion or alarm. People should easily be able to determine if there is a spiritual conflict of interest by interviewing their healer before a healing session. ALL PEOPLE have the RIGHT TO DO THIS. Much of energy medicine is done at a vibrational awareness level only. That is to say that the healer processes the highest form of energy the damaged and/or blocked areas of their clients' bodyminds to create a renewed bodymind or a WHOLENESS.

During my Energetic Transformations class, I visualized me channeling the Holy Spirit and I noticed an actual positive response. I did this because I was trying to tap into my charismatic experiences from the 1990s. It worked. I made a mental note to self.

Some religions forbid energy work/healings because this source of channeling is considered unlawful or flat out EVIL.

I have participated in energy work/healings for over 15 years. Never have I encountered such EVIL within the realms of healing. Multidimensionality is an evolution of Higher Consciousness. It happens through greater awareness.

The only time I experienced EVIL of any kind was when I explored a magickal and metaphysical community that was intentionally endeavoring in negativity and destructive and DARK forces. People within that magickal and metaphysical community intentionally tried to harm others through egoic behavior and/or magick. This is what I spoke of at the beginning of this Hub as the Dark expression of magick.

Strictly metaphysical communities are created through intention. Metaphysical author James Redfield of Celestine Prophecy said, "Where intention goes energy flows." If intentions are dark or egoic, to begin with, everything created by those communities will be wrong, unlawful, or dark in nature.

In fact, every good intentioned energy healing I have participated in is merely the vibration of LOVE being processed through our seven energy bodies and our various chakras.

Another Hub from five years ago was written about the chakras and how they work in regard to physical and mental illnesses:
The same editing, crafting and completion of thought are in effect.

There is no difference between a well-intentioned energy experience and a well-intentioned life experience. That is to say, if someone is doing or saying something from the ego it can and will be as harmful as any energy work that is from the ego. Destructive actions are destructive. Constructive actions are constructive.

The Dalai Lama is said to be according to Tibetan tradition: "Following the Buddhist belief in the principle of reincarnation...It took four years to find the 14th (current) Dalai Lama, Tenzin Gyatso."

"In the course of upholding the Buddhist tradition in Tibet, we evolved a unique Tibetan tradition of recognizing the reincarnations of scholar-adepts that has been of immense help to both the Dharma and sentient beings, particularly to the monastic community...The Dalai Lamas have functioned as both the political and spiritual leaders of Tibet for 369 years since 1642. I (the current Dalai Lama) have now voluntarily brought this to an end, proud and satisfied that we can pursue the kind of democratic system of government flourishing elsewhere in the world...However, in the absence of clear guidelines, should the concerned public express a strong wish for the Dalai Lamas to continue, there is an obvious risk of vested political interests misusing the reincarnation system to fulfill their own political agenda...For those who remember their past lives, rebirth is a clear experience. However, most ordinary beings forget their past lives as they go through the process of death, intermediate state and rebirth. As past and future rebirths are slightly obscure to them, we need to use evidence-based logic to prove past and future rebirths to them."

"There are people who can remember their immediate past life or even many past lives, as well as being able to recognize places and relatives from those lives. This is not just something that happened in the past. Even today there are many people in the East and West, who can recall incidents and experiences from their past lives. Denying this is not an honest and impartial way of doing research, because it runs counter to this evidence. The Tibetan system of recognizing reincarnations is an authentic mode of investigation based on people’s recollection of their past lives." According to the current Dalai Lama, "There are two ways in which someone can take rebirth after death: rebirth under the sway of karma and destructive emotions and rebirth through the power of compassion and prayer. Regarding the first, due to ignorance negative and positive karma are created and their imprints remain on the consciousness...They familiarise themselves with virtue that at the time of death can be reactivated providing the means for them to take rebirth in a higher realm of existence. On the other hand, superior Bodhisattvas, who have attained the path of seeing, are not reborn through the force of their karma and destructive emotions, but due to the power of their compassion for sentient beings and based on their prayers to benefit others. They are able to choose their place and time of birth as well as their future parents."

Some scholar-adept sentient beings have been found in exile from their spiritual communities. Their lives have been tumultuous. Two such beings are captured below. It is interesting that their reincarnations reflect a sign of the times. One being called T.C. found peace with himself after he began the psychiatric med, lithium.

"I had first met Ngari Rinpoche years before when I was a Time correspondent in Delhi. 'Don’t call me ‘rinpoche’,' he said abruptly. 'I don’t have the qualities to be a monk or a Rinpoche. I’m an ordinary person. Call me ‘T.C.’,' short for his family name, Tenzin Choegyal...Over the years, lithium helped to lift him (T.C.)—and so, eventually, did his return to regular Buddhist practice. This, he says, gave him a glimpse into the nature of the mind, the idea that all thoughts, disturbing or pleasurable, are as insubstantial as a feather floating on the winds of consciousness. 'It was only when I began to understand my afflictive emotions that I became interested in spiritual matters,' he explained. This happened when he hit his forties. 'In depression, you have a strong sense of ‘I,’ but you have to size it up, examine it, and the more you do, the lighter you become.' Most of our emotional troubles, he said, come from chasing after 'egocentric interests.' T.C. explained: 'When you can’t get what you want, you get angry—at the world, at yourself—and to overcome that, you become numb, out of sync.'"

Furthermore, another exiled example is Lama Teshe..." I spoke to Nicholas Ribush, director of the Lama Yeshe Wisdom Archive. 'We don’t really understand the workings of reincarnation, only that there’s a continuit y of consciousness. But it doesn’t happen that there’s an identical continuity, and perhaps some of Lama Yeshe’s followers expected that,' he explained. 'They were puzzled, disappointed.'"

Holistic Science, Spirituality, and Medicine

Since December of 2012, the world has been shifting at a very rapid rate. There was a cosmological shift during that time that caused the vibrational patterns to increase expeditiously. "The ancient Maya were accomplished observers of the sky. This image shows Maya animal constellations found in the Paris Codex. Using their knowledge of astronomy and mathematics, the ancient Maya developed one of the most accurate calendar systems in human history. The ancient Maya had a fascination with cycles of time. The most commonly known Maya cyclical calendars are the Haab, the Tzolk’in, and the Calendar Round. Aside from these, the Maya also developed the Long Count calendar to chronologically date mythical and historical events. The 13 baktun cycle of the Maya Long Count calendar measures 1,872,000 days or 5,125.366 tropical years. This is one of the longest cycles found in the Maya calendar system." On the winter solstice, December 21, 2012, the cycle ceased.

Before this calendar ceased, many people and Hollywood began predicting "End of the World" scenarios. It was not an end of the world. It was a change in the relationship of humankind to time. Time and space are man-made constructs to help humanity cope with its life and its activities. Holistic practitioners do not have the same view of time that others have. For Holistic practitioners, time is actually a conglomeration of past, present, and future. There is no true separation. The separation is an issue created by the illusionary aspect of the 3-Dimensional world.

"Professor Kostas Skenderis of Mathematical Sciences at the University of Southampton explains: 'Imagine that everything you see, feel and hear in three dimensions (and your perception of time) in fact emanates from a flat two-dimensional field. The idea is similar to that of ordinary holograms where a three-dimensional image is encoded in a two-dimensional surface, such as in the hologram on a credit card. However, this time, the entire universe is encoded!'
Although not an example with holographic properties, it could be thought of as rather like watching a 3D film in a cinema. We see the pictures as having height, width and crucially, depth – when in fact it all originates from a flat 2D screen. The difference, in our 3D universe, is that we can touch objects and the ‘projection’ is ‘real’ from our perspective."

Albert Einstein said, "Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."

Alok Shenoy said, "From the little I understand of Relativity and Quantum Mechanics, Einstein says that each body in the universe has its effect on every other body. We can't see these influences. We believe what we see is what exists...Reality in the above statement by Einstein refers to what we as a society (Western society) call a reality. What we see by our bare eyes is reality. He calls it an illusion and that part I have tried to explain with the example of a spoon stirring in a cup which is causing an effect in the cup even in the absence of any fluid in the cup. This is something we cannot see. This is an effect which does not cross over to a DIMENSION visible to the naked eye. At an atomic level, the possible activity I can think of is during the stirring action, alignment of electrons as per the electrostatic charge on the surface of the cup that you have induced as you scrape the surface with the spoon...This alignment of electrons along the surface to counteract the electrostatic force however does not change what you see hence the persistence of the illusion we live with."

As science and spirituality merge into Holistic Living, terminology transforms quickly. Sometimes, it is difficult to determine terms that succinctly capture an idea or concept or practice. Spirit and Soul are two such ideas. Multidimensionality is not properly aligned to historical Scriptural references of any kind...whether religious or not. There is a new framework being molded and shaped by a humanity that is changing quickly. East and West are no longer distinctly different as technology has unified a lot of our thoughts and experiences. People in both hemispheres are merging culturally. Medicine is no longer heavily weighted to the Western viewpoint. Many Eastern medicine philosophies are influencing the West.

Holistic Living is a convergence of Eastern and Western ways. It includes astronomy and astrology. Lost sciences of Ancient Cultures like Egypt, Mesopotamia, and Atlantis are being rediscovered and often revised. Whole cities and continents are being found at the bottom of the ocean. The great library of ancient Alexandria of Egypt is being researched. Knowledge is changing...sometimes second by second. Fundamentalist and literal interpretations of religions are being transformed.

Holistic medicine is influencing many Western physicians and nurses. While researching this topic I happened across the following Internet article that I found very interesting and helpful:

Prestigious medical physicians such as Dr. Norman Shealy, Dr. Bernie Siegel, Dr. Arthur Guirdham, and Dr. W. Brugh Joy are all cited in the article.

Dr. Siegel is a retired assistant clinical professor of surgery at Yale University. His biography is as follows . He is an oncology expert.

Dr. Shealy is an MD and PhD. He is the Founder and CEO of the International Institute of Holistic Medicine. He graduated from Duke University of School of Medicine. He practiced neurosurgery.

"Dr. Arthur Guirdham (1905–1992) was an English physician, psychiatrist, novelist, and writer on the Cathar sect, alternative medicine, ESP and reincarnation. He graduated from Oxford University and Charing Cross."

"Dr. Joy shared the story of the spiritual transformation that led him to abandon his medical practice and indeed his whole way of life. In the ten years since, Dr. Joy has experienced the dramatic second stage of his spiritual evolution and Avalanche is the result. In this iconoclastic book, Dr. Joy challenges the idealistic vision of spirituality as an experience of love, light, and harmony. He dares to appreciate the dark, shadow side of human nature that, if left unintegrated, can wreak havoc in our lives."

"In 1974, Dr. W. Brugh Joy was a distinguished and respected member of the Los Angeles medical community. In that year he contracted a life-threatening disease that culminated in an illuminating meditation, which caused him to give up his medical practice abruptly. Six weeks later he discovered that his illness was totally cured. This experience pushed him to further his explorations into realms of healing involving body energies, the chakra system, meditation, and higher levels of consciousness."

In Conclusion: A Summary for ALL X-men in the World

I am a self-declared X-man. I have a disorder that is much more than a disease. It is a revelation. I have many spiritual and creative gifts. I have had a very rough life path and journey, but it is also, very often, an awakening to the "Bigger Picture". I have symptomology that is psychiatric in nature as well as medical in nature. The criteria give a visualization of strange phenomena such as a "SUPERPOWER" energetic system, a bunch of hyperawarenesses as well as hyper states/conditions.

I have sensitivities that I spent 30 years denying cognizantly and spiritually. I no longer see these sensitivities as immoral or physically and scientifically impossible. I see them as an inherent part of me. The world is far larger and amazing than I ever conceived it could be before my first psychotic break began changing my life.

My artistic mind is just one attribute of mine. My teaching spirit is another. My symptom of hypergraphia makes me a writer. My symptom of pressured thought gives me an ever-creative brain. My symptom of pressured speech gives me an awareness that others need me to be slower and more precise and more descriptive. My symptom of hypersexuality has given me a much wider sexual perspective and practice than the average person which has quite dramatically introduced me to spirituality on that level.

Each episode I experience of depression makes me consider the shadows and the light. Each mania I experience awakens me to other universes and other perspectives that my balanced periods do not provide.

My suicide attempts have connected me to the surreal that is actually occurring on some fantastic dimension. Angels are very real to me. Near Death Experiences (NDEs) and Out of Body Experiences (OBEs) are not some bizarre delusion that does not actually happen. They are very real.

Psychiatric medicine does much to assist my huge energetic system that would otherwise be so obtuse and full of distraction for the rest of the planet. But such medications as lithium, Haldol, Cogentin, Pamelor and Prozac have horrible effects on the physical bodymind AND they are imperfect or incomplete in their intended function. As my brother, Chris, once said, "So, you are on chemotherapy for life!"

Psychiatric medicine also practices a very ego-driven science. It is highly subjective and frequently wrong and full of mishap and undiscovered "malpractice".

I am 26 years into this alternative lifestyle. It has been filled with devastating ups and downs. It has been filled with wonder. My medication history is long and diverse. I have experienced physical and mental horrors and terrors that most people cannot and do not want to imagine.

I am currently on Seroquel, and Trileptal as well as Calcium supplements twice a day. I take Levothyroxine for my hypothyroidism which was created by the lithium I took for two decades. And, I take a high blood pressure medicine as well.

I had Diabetes 2 for several years which was created by the long-term use of the Seroquel. At one point I weighed 301lbs. When I was in college before I started taking lithium, I was 120lbs. Through diet and exercise and sheer determination, I lost 90lbs., I got my A1C level to a 5.3, and I eventually got off Metformin.

I monitor my blood levels for all these conditions regularly.

I have survived a lot. And yet, in many ways, I have also thrived. Being an X-man is not easy. But! It is what I AM. The videos in this Hub are external resources to explore. I incorporated some of the spokespeople that have educated and inspired me over the years regarding Holistic Living.

Dr. Wayne Dyer

Teal Swan

Deepak Chopra

Louise Hay

Other Hubpages by Joan Elizabeth Baxter

Bipolar Energies vs. Bipolar Disorder: Living with a Body Pumped Full of Power

How Chakras Work and the Development of Physical and Mental Disorder and Disease

The Emotional Body: Making It Healthy

Heaven and Reincarnation: Can They Co-exist?

This content is for informational purposes only and does not substitute for formal and individualized diagnosis, prognosis, treatment, prescription, and/or dietary advice from a licensed medical professional. Do not stop or alter your current course of treatment. If pregnant or nursing, consult with a qualified provider on an individual basis. Seek immediate help if you are experiencing a medical emergency.

© 2019 Joan Elizabeth Baxter


Deborah Bravandt from St. George, Utah on March 23, 2020:

Beautiful, articulate article. Thank you.

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