- 1. They don't compliment you
Most people are happy for you when you succeed in something, or have reached a goal of yours. If you have a friend that is trying to sabotage you or is jealous, they likely won't say anything if you tell them amazing news. They may have a blank stare, or even change the subject. The worst is a compliment with a backhanded insult.
- 2. They Copy You
True friends are interested in what you do, and may ask to do things together or teach you something. A fake friend will be trying to find out what your doing - and then try to do it better. They may appear to take a liking to you, but if they start baking your boyfriend his favorite cookies that you taught them, watch out.
- 3. They Turn Your Good News Into Something Negative
Ever get so excited to tell someone something great that just happen and they only have something negative to say? That really puts a damper on things. And that's what they want. They are jealous that you did something that they didn't.
- 4. They Gossip
This one may be harder to detect, but if you pay attention you'll catch it. Likely if they gossip about others, you better believe they are gossiping about you. Their friends may even start acting more standoff-ish towards you. Is it because something they said?
- 5. You Feel Something Is Off
I say this all the time -- instincts are usually never wrong -- TRUST YOUR GUT! Are you feeling something is just off with your new friend? Are their actions and words not adding up? Do they proclaim to have empathy and even post on facebook about how great they are, but you hear them bad mouthing their other friends? I suggest to get out of that friendship fast!
The most important thing after you recognize these signs, is to do the following:
- Stop telling them anything about yourself
- Don't tell them what you notice them doing (unless you want gaslighted)
- Stay cordial if you have to OR
- Simply end the friendship
They'll get bored and find a new target
Thanks for reading, I hope you found this helpful. Let me know in the comment section other things you have noticed about your experiences with toxic friends!
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
Neena Daniels (author) from Pittsburgh, PA on December 22, 2019:
Thank you for the nice comment, Kelly Ann. That is a great point, that our bodies tell us. That is most certainly correct, i remember getting tightness in my chest and stomach pains from the anxiety of being around such people. Thank you for sharing!
Kelly Ann Christensen from Overland Park, Johnson County, Kansas on December 22, 2019:
That reminds me of a card I received when I graduated from law school. He never did bring himself to even say congratulations, and one of the cards I received had his first name as the artist. It contained a backhanded insult. Small person in my estimation.
I like your advice about trusting your gut. One thing I have noticed around certain people is that my body is speaking the truth when I notice that every muscle in my body is tensed up when I'm around a certain person.
Welcome to Hubpages. I am enjoying reading your articles. Keep up the good work!
Joyful Pride from India on December 19, 2019:
Neena Daniels (author) from Pittsburgh, PA on December 17, 2019:
Thanks for reading DJReyes. I'm glad you could relate!
Louise, thank you for the kind comment, i'm happy that my article can validate for you what you already know. And the thing is, that once you know what to look for, you can't unsee it; so now you are wiser and more equip to handle and disengage as soon as you notice it next time!
Louise Elcross from Preston on December 16, 2019:
I can relate to all of this so thanks for sharing. It is incredible how some people will draw you in with their initial kind and loving ways and then you find that they are not honest. I fell for the gaslighting for a while before I realised what was happening. Message is clear, trust your instincts. Thanks for sharing.
DJReyes from USA on December 15, 2019:
1 or 2 of the 5 things you've said happened to me, so I can relate to it. Thanks for sharing this post.
Neena Daniels (author) from Pittsburgh, PA on December 12, 2019:
Thank you so much for the honest critique, I will take your advice!
Cynthia Zirkwitz from Vancouver Island, Canada on December 12, 2019:
Congratulations on publishing your first hub! It is catchy and contains useful content-- a problem and a choice of ways to resolve it!
May I suggest you include a couple of clear, high quality images related to the theme? These images are the thumbnails that show up whenever your article is showcased on Hubpages.
Otherwise, carry on! You have made a great start!