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AGORAPHOBIA-WARRIOR

Bhavik is a creative write and he is also a Digital Marketer.

AGORAPHOBIA

AGORAPHOBIA

GOA PLANNING

It was a warm spring evening; my extended family was planning the most awaited trip to Goa. I was super excited as this was the first time in 13 years, I was about to fly on a plane and enjoy that soothing Goa breeze, that exotic beach fun and how can I forget the water adventures. Each member had something to add to the planning list: The private beach hotel, which flight to opt, sightseeing spots, the day to check-in and check-out, shopping spots, the churches and the casinos of course. On hearing this I was much excited and my excitement was gradually aiming the peak. I already told each friend about my “GOA TRIP- FUN UNLIMITED” and asked some to join as well. Anyway, we had to wait for 3 months to fly.

The Day

Tomorrow we will be flying to Goa, the trip we were planning for 3 months and I was dreaming about, every single night. The night was too big for me to spend hence I spend my whole night rolling over my bed. I was the one to wake up and get ready to go, before anyone else in the house.

At the airport, I felt something strange, initially, I kept it to myself, thinking that it’s my excitement but as we boarded the plane, my heart started beating too fast and I was expecting it to pop out of my ribs, my breathes shortened, numbness grabbed my body and my chest started to feel the pain and chills rolled over my body, my parents grabbed me and somehow they managed me to take out of the plane. I was okay as soon as we reached out. Everyone, except my parents and I, flee to Goa, the trip I was dreaming for the past 3 months, I was disturbed as my dream shattered but my parents were disturbed by the unusual thing that happened to me. We went for a consultation to our physician, “IT MUST BE BECAUSE OF THE HOT CLIMATE.” the doctor said. And my parents were relaxed then.

The next day, we planned for the little getaway to the nearest picnic spot in our car. Everything was fine till the time we went to the really big open garden and there I started behaving in the strange manner and all those things that happened to my body, happened again. I was now scared and so do my parents, “IT MUST BE BECAUSE OF THE HOT CLIMATE.”, we thought.

The series of incidents led me to fear, the fear of moving out of the house alone. My family told me to go out and play with friends but I used to stay indoors playing video games on which everyone in the house commented, “I was addicted to technology/mobile phones and games.” But that wasn’t the truth; it was my escape from moving out alone. Eight months passed to this and my fear was growing along. My every escape was successful and I was growing much comfortable with excuses.

It is well said, “It takes a thief to catch a thief.” It was a cherry winter morning out but my body was feeling like burning coal, cold and cough grabbed my throat. I was taken to the hospital where the doctor’s little cabin had the whole medical world inside; it had everything that is needed to cure a patient. As soon as we stepped inside, my heart started beating too fast and I was expecting it to pop out of my ribs, my breathes shortened, numbness grabbed my body and my chest started to feel the pain and chills rolled over my body, it was the same experience as into the flight. The doctor sensed that something is different with this kid, he inquired my parents whether I have experienced the same before and my parents briefed every minute thing to him.

I was sent out of the doctor’s cabin as the doctor wanted to discuss something with my parents secretly. The same evening I was taken to another doctor, my parents were disturbed while taking me there. As we reached there, the nameplate read as COUNSELOR, I had read the term for the first time but I was told that we are going to another doctor for a checkup. We met a very impressive personality; I was friends with her within some seconds. She asked me about my day-to-day routine which directed us towards my ‘escape plans’ that she already knew. And then the Goa plan and that big open garden incident. Now, she knew everything about me.

Initially, she suggested my parents to depend on medications for a while along with some therapies; she already started working on me. As we were now more of friends, because she was the one to understand my emotions and my feels, she assured to accompany me to various places and taught me how to control my fears. I used to cry out loud and go total out of control, that sometimes my actions would harm the person with me, when exposed to the situations that shattered my soul and filled my body with fearful chills but her words “DON’T LET YOUR INNER DEMONS (FEARS) DOMINATE YOUR POWER AND YOUR MIND.” had some magic. She made me join the yoga class that I hated because some yoga/exercises were a bit tough for me in the beginning but soon I loved doing them all.

Now I am 20 years old, I have been to Goa for 3 times now and had fun more than I dreamt of at the age of 13, I have been to that big garden experienced the soothing fragrance of flowers, I go to the grocery shops all alone, Enjoy cycling on the roads. It took me some time to understand and accept that I was suffering from AGORAPHOBIA, but my parents and my counselor made me accept the fact that ‘I have to accept what I am suffering from as it will only take me out of the situation until then nobody could help me’. It was tough to go through but now life is amazing as we all are aware, “Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny.”

© 2021 Bhavik Dhanvani

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